Admittedly, when Chanyeol got roped into going to a youth camp day with his church, he didn’t think he would enjoy it all that much. (Okay, so he hadn’t been “roped into going”, it was more like his parents said he was going and that was the end of it.) But it was just one day, it wasn’t even like an overnight thing or a weekend thing or anything like that, so he figured he would bear with it and accept whatever Jesus-y events he would be forced to take part in today. He wasn’t an Atheist or anything, he just didn’t put going to church things at the top of his do-for-fun list. At least his older sister was there to suffer with him. Really though, other than her and one other guy around her age from their church, Chanyeol knew no one, and if the people there were anything like the rest of his church, it was going to be a holy terror of a day.

There was about a hundred kids there in total, and Chanyeol wasn’t really sure why he’d been expecting more (maybe because they had driven all the way to Mapo – all six kilometers – and they were closer to the center of Seoul now), but he was a bit relieved by the smaller crowd. Not that he was bad at socializing, but he was kind of awkward upon meeting new people and tended to overcompensate by being too obnoxious and scaring everyone off. He didn’t really plan to make friends here, anyway, because he didn’t want overly-religious snobs in his life; he already got that enough from his family. Then again, who knew how many kids (well, young adults) were here because their parents had dragged them into it, like himself. Still, Chanyeol had enough friends at home, he wasn’t worried about obtaining more.

His mindset ended up changing very quickly.

Everyone was split up into groups of ten or so, so everyone could go around and do everything in a semi-orderly fashion. There were only eight other boys in Chanyeol’s group, a couple who seemed to know each other, a couple who Chanyeol thought were kind of cute, but at least half the guys seemed pretty snooty, and those were all the better looking ones. You couldn’t have everything, Chanyeol supposed. Not that he would even think of looking for love at a place like this; his religion and his uality were sort of very opposing, so yeah, that wasn’t happening.

There were about four of them who were kind of awkwardly on their own, and Chanyeol was one of them. This wasn’t allowed to last for long, though, because soon they were told to find a partner (or form a group of three), and Chanyeol knew he was going to have to stop acting like a total loner and pull himself together. He was in the process of doing as much when one of the other boys came up to him and smiled warmly.

“Wanna be partners?” the other asked brightly, and Chanyeol’s mind immediately made note of his cute eye smile. He thought the boy was at least a year or two younger than him (not that he minded, all his friends were younger than him too).

“Oh, yeah, sure,” Chanyeol said, trying to keep his voice at a bearable level. Even if the guy was younger, he was cute, especially when he was smiling widely again.  “I’m Chanyeol,” he offered, giving a smaller smile of his own.

“Byun Baekhyun,” the other returned pleasantly. “I’m also kinda relieved you’re one of the youth, and not a leader. You definitely look like you could be a leader.”

Chanyeol was pretty sure he didn’t look that old. All the leaders were mid-twenties and older. “How old do you think I am?”

“Probably older than you are,” Baekhyun admitted, and his smile became a bit shy. “Are you in college?”

“No,” Chanyeol laughed. He’d heard it a hundred times that he looked older than he was, but he still felt kind of proud of it. “I’m in my last year of high school. I’m not even seventeen until November.”

Baekhyun’s eyes widened. “Wow, I’m actually older than you!” And his smile was kind of blinding. “My birthday already went by.”

It took a while for Chanyeol to process that this very cute, sunny boy was somehow older than him, and that Chanyeol was very much allowed to think he was so cute without feeling guilty. On top of that, Baekhyun was nothing but wonderfully nice the whole morning as they went through their partner and group activities together. And when they broke for lunch, Baekhyun asked if Chanyeol wanted to sit with him, and they talked more – not even about religious things, just about themselves, even though Baekhyun told him he’d come on his own just because he wanted to. Baekhyun told him about how he lived in Bucheon, and how his brother was studying abroad in university, and how he knew it seemed totally lame of him to come to something like this but he really liked his religion and was always willing to learn more, and he liked meeting people.

By the end of lunch, Chanyeol knew he had one of those one-day crushes on the guy. He also knew that was really stupid of him, because Baekhyun was obviously a super social and religious guy, and that was not good for Chanyeol. Chanyeol, with his three close friends and a couple acquaintances; Chanyeol, who was gay and hadn’t even told his family or anyone because being gay was wrong in their eyes, and of course it would be in Baekhyun’s. But he got caught up in soft brown eyes and warm smiles throughout the day anyway, and he only felt a little regretful. It was just one day; he probably wouldn’t even see Baekhyun again.

Except when Chanyeol went to call his parents to tell them to leave soon, about half an hour before the day was over, Baekhyun asked where Chanyeol lived, and Chanyeol told him his house was in Yangcheon.

“Oh, really? I can give you a ride home,” Baekhyun told him happily. “It’s on the way to Bucheon anyway, don’t worry about making your parents get you.” And that was it. The camp ended, Chanyeol found his sister and told her about their ride, and then they were getting into Baekhyun’s car.

“You do have your license, right?” Chanyeol’s sister joked as she got in the back seat. Baekhyun grinned at her in the mirror.

“Of course,” he assured her lightly. “I’m a great driver.” They bantered playfully for a moment, and Baekhyun’s age was brought up again, Chanyeol’s sister seeming impressed upon hearing he was older than Chanyeol. Chanyeol just sat there quietly, feeling kind of sick, because it felt awfully flirtatious, and he wasn’t surprised or anything (his sister was beautiful and Baekhyun was cute and it was natural for straight boys to flirt with pretty girls), but he sort of resented his sister for the moment.

But then Baekhyun’s attention returned to Chanyeol. “Today was pretty fun, don’t you think? I mean, even if you only went because your family made you, you seemed like you were enjoying yourself.”

“Yeah, it wasn’t so bad,” Chanyeol admitted. “The people weren’t unbearable like I was expecting. Some of them were kind of cool, actually.” Well, just one of them.

“I was the coolest, right?” Baekhyun joked, shooting him a quick grin. Chanyeol laughed, but nodded when Baekhyun’s eyes returned to the road. “You should add your number to my phone so we can stay in touch.”

“Huh?” Chanyeol said intelligently. That hadn’t been part of the plan. He was supposed to let Baekhyun go now – or at least, when he got home and saw Baekhyun’s car drive away – not let some sort of friendship or whatever bloom between them. But, well, it was Baekhyun who had suggested it, and maybe Baekhyun would only text him for like two days and then forget about him. “Oh, yeah, sure,” he muttered, and remembered that he’d said the same thing earlier – the first thing he’d said to Baekhyun. The older pulled his phone out of his pocket and handed it to Chanyeol without lifting his gaze from the road, and Chanyeol went to his contacts and added himself in as just “Park Chanyeol”.

Soon enough, he was at his home, thanking Baekhyun for the ride, and Baekhyun quickly sent him a message so Chanyeol could save his number too. And that was the end of it.

Except that, when Chanyeol went up to his bedroom, he grabbed a pen and went to his calendar, circling the fourth of September and writing a short line. Met Byun Baekhyun.

“

The camp had been on the Saturday before school started, and Chanyeol was too awkward to ever text Byun Baekhyun again. By the end of the week, he was planning on deleting the other’s number from his phone, so maybe he’d be able to forget about him. However, on Tuesday morning he got a message from Baekhyun, wishing him good luck for the first day of school. Chanyeol replied to say good luck as well, and he figured Baekhyun wouldn’t message him back, but the older did, to say thank you, adding a smiley face at the end. So maybe that was an obligatory text, but there wouldn’t be more.

Baekhyun had other things in mind. Around three o’clock as he was walking home, Chanyeol received another text, asking how his first day had gone, and he just said it was okay and out of politeness asked Baekhyun how his was. Rather than a short reply, Baekhyun told him about how he could already tell he was going to hate his math class because his teacher was a total jerk, and how it was literally the first day but three girls had asked him out (and Chanyeol was kind of happy when Baekhyun said it was totally annoying and not flattering or anything), and it had been kind of totally weird at lunch because most of his friend circle were gone off to university and stuff, but other than that, it had been pretty normal for him, too.

So much for forgetting Baekhyun.

Baekhyun always had something to say from then on, never starting a conversation out of boredom, and seeming genuinely interested in talking to Chanyeol. He never texted Baekhyun first, but the boy seemed not to notice, messaging him maybe once or twice a day. Gradually, though, messaging the older became a more frequent thing; sometimes, Chanyeol wouldn’t reply right away, or wouldn’t see Baekhyun’s message until a while later, so their conversations would be dragged out over the day. Within a couple of weeks, Baekhyun texted Chanyeol pretty often, and they talked about all sorts of things, getting to know each other like real friends instead of two guys who met one time at a church camp and didn’t even live in the same town.

At first, Chanyeol’s friends didn’t say anything, not seeming to notice how often Chanyeol was on his phone at lunch, because he was a lot anyway, surfing the internet and whatnot. But it was only a matter of time before someone caught on to how he would suddenly start smiling and then typing.

That someone turned out to be his friend Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo was quiet – not because he was shy, just because he preferred to observe, and he was very good at noticing things (well, most things). So of course he figured out Chanyeol was messaging someone, not just blogging and checking his social media, and one day he pointed it out, in his quiet but direct manner.

“Do you have a girlfriend, hyung?” Kyungsoo wondered as Chanyeol read his latest message from Baekhyun at lunch one day. There was only one person Kyungsoo referred to as hyung, since their other friends, Sehun and Jongin, were younger than them. Still it took Chanyeol a moment to realize Kyungsoo was speaking to him, a bit lost in his Baekhyun-filled world.

“Huh? No,” he answered finally, feeling himself grow warm at being put on the spot.

“Well, you seem to really like whoever you’re texting all the time,” Kyungsoo noted, not accusing but just curious.

“It’s not my girlfriend,” Chanyeol assured him. When he saw Sehun raising an eyebrow, he added, “I don’t have a girlfriend.”

“Then who is it?”

“It’s… my boyfriend,” Chanyeol joked, and all of his friends stared at him in shock. Apparently, they hadn’t gotten the joke part of it. “I’m kidding,” he clarified. Though I wish I wasn’t.

“You had me worried,” Jongin said, laughing. “Like, since when do you have a boyfriend? Since when do you like boys?” Chanyeol didn’t much feel like laughing himself, but he forced himself to anyway. He knew Jongin was just playing around, acting like it would be so appalling for Chanyeol to be gay; a year ago, Jongin had told Chanyeol in confidence that he thought he might like boys himself, even if he thought he was mostly straight. Chanyeol hadn’t come out to him, but he’d assured Jongin he was okay with it and he wouldn’t tell anyone.

(He also had the sneaking suspicion that at least one of the guys who was making Jongin question his uality was Kyungsoo, who they’d met the last year, but he hadn’t asked about that either.)

“Anyway, who is this mystery person, then?” Jongin went on. “Or is it people? Did you make new friends without us, ‘Yeol? Are you ditching us before you even graduate?”

This time Chanyeol laughed for real. “Nah,” he said. “Just a friend I made over the summer who’s pretty cool. He was at that stupid camp thing my parents made me go to.”

“And you still like him?” Jongin asked mock-incredulously. “You must be serious about him, then.”

Chanyeol shrugged. “I guess. He lives in Bucheon, so we don’t actually hang out, but we text a lot.”

“So, it’s a long-distance relationship?” Sehun put in, and Chanyeol grinned.

“I guess,” he repeated, amused. He kind of liked that idea; that Baekhyun was his long-distance boyfriend. And apparently his friends did, too, because the term kind of stuck after that, and whenever they saw him messaging anyone they asked if it was his boyfriend. They never actually found out his real name (they didn’t ask), until one day in late November Baekhyun called Chanyeol during their afternoon break.

First of all, Chanyeol had never asked Baekhyun to call him, nor had Baekhyun told Chanyeol he would be calling. It was just something that happened, and Chanyeol wondered if Baekhyun had thought about it beforehand at all or just suddenly decided he wanted to hear Chanyeol’s voice (that would be nice). Either way, he was kind of excited to hear Baekhyun’s voice for the first time in over two and a half months, so he eagerly hushed his friends and answered the phone.

“Hello?”

“Hey, Chanyeol.”

Chanyeol melted a little bit at his voice. It was far more beautiful than he’d remembered.

“HI CHANYEOL’S BOYFRIEND!”

And then Chanyeol died a little inside. He was going to kill his friends, because Jongin and Sehun had not just said that when Baekhyun could hear them. Chanyeol was going to sink into a puddle of embarrassment. Oh gosh.

Baekhyun just laughed, though. “Was that directed at me?” he asked lightly.

“Uh, yeah,” Chanyeol said awkwardly, trying to brush it off like it was no big deal. “Um, it’s sort of a joke we have, ha ha. Since they always see me texting you and don’t know who you are, they refer to you as my boyfriend. It’s just a stupid thing they say, ha. So, I guess you’re my boyfriend.”

“Well this is news,” Baekhyun replied, and Chanyeol was relieved that he sounded amused and not revolted. “I didn’t realize I had a boyfriend. How exciting. Anyway, other than finding that out, I actually called to ask if you wanted to like, hang out sometime. Since we sort of know each other now, and I’ve kind of been busy all the time since school started but I’m finally not. And I mean, we’re apparently dating, right?” Baekhyun’s laugh chimed and Chanyeol felt equal parts warm and fuzzy at the beauty of the sound and sort of put out because Baekhyun was treating their “relationship” like a joke (which of course, it was, but still…).

“Yeah, of course,” Chanyeol played along. “I mean, what kind of boyfriend doesn’t go on dates with his boyfriend?”

“Right?” Baekhyun agreed. “I could drive down to your place then, and we can hang out there or go out and do stuff, whatever works. When’s a good day for you?”

Oh gosh, was this real? Was he actually going to have a date with Baekhyun? (No, not really; they were just getting together as friends. It was just like hanging out with Jongin or Kyungsoo or Sehun. But whatever, he was allowed to be delusional as long as he kept it to himself.)

If he was going to hang out with Baekhyun, though, it was going to be for as many hours as possible. “Are you busy Saturday?” Chanyeol posed, and then noted, “Which is tomorrow. Are you busy tomorrow?”

“No, tomorrow would be great!” Baekhyun said cheerily. “I’ll be there around, maybe eleven? I’d say earlier but I sleep in late on weekends.”

“Same,” Chanyeol nodded, though Baekhyun couldn’t see. Seriously, though, Chanyeol usually slept until noon on weekends, but he was willing to get up early for Baekhyun. “Yeah, eleven is great.”

“Cool! Well, I have class, and you should too, so I’ll let you go and see you tomorrow!”

As soon as he hung up, Jongin punched his arm. “So I guess we get to meet your boyfriend, huh?”

“Um, since when are you invited?” Chanyeol frowned, even though he was still on high (and probably would be until Baekhyun arrived the following day).

“Don’t act dumb,” Jongin returned. “You should’ve told him to bring you a present, so he won’t feel so left out when the rest of us have one for you.” Chanyeol stared at him blankly, not comprehending. “You can’t have seriously forgotten tomorrow is your birthday.”

Oh. No.

“Oh my gosh,” Chanyeol whispered.

“You actually forgot! How do you forget your own birthday?! You’ve been going on about it all week!”

He had forgotten, in the midst of his excitement of having Baekhyun call him. It was the twenty-sixth of November today, and yes, tomorrow was definitely his birthday and he had just invited Baekhyun over and Baekhyun was going to think he’d done it on purpose and oh gosh, this was bad. He was about to call the other back when the warning bell rang and he had to hurry to class instead. The moment he was in his seat, though, he quickly sent a message to the older.

“Uh, I sorta totally forgot that tmrw is my birthday ㅠ I’m gonna be hanging out with my friends and stuff. You can still come if you want but, yeah, it completely slipped my mind”

Chanyeol was chastising himself internally as he sent the message, feeling like a total idiot. He wondered if Baekhyun would even believe him, or if he would think Chanyeol was just trying to blow him off like a total jerk. A minute later, he got a text back.

“ㅋㅋㅋ That’s okay! Do you mind if I come anyway? I don’t wanna bother you on your bday, but I’d still like to hang with you~”

It was hard to hold in the squeak that burst in his throat. He made a hundred mistakes trying to type back as fast as he could. “You can come! That’d be cool v^.^ Class now, gotta go. See you tmrw~”

Maybe it hadn’t been his intention (and it really hadn’t!), but Chanyeol had just made his birthday a million times better.

“

He didn’t take into account that his other friends would be there. Hanging out with Baekhyun on his birthday would have been really, really awesome if it was just the two of them. But of course, Jongin and Sehun and Kyungsoo were there too, and though the latter was pretty bearable, the former two made Chanyeol’s life very hard.

For one thing, they decided to arrive at like ten in the morning and wake him up, the terrible people they were. And then Baekhyun showed up an hour later (at exactly eleven, curse him), and Chanyeol was kind of really happy to see him and Baekhyun even hugged him and gave him a card and everything, and they were all obnoxious about the guy. And maybe Chanyeol would have been able to handle it, but after Baekhyun had hugged him he was feeling a little dizzy (because he was warm and smelled very, very wonderful) and going through a bit of a crisis as he was crushed by waves of feelings, and he didn’t have time for any of his other friends’ childishness. This was not something to be joking about.

(Because last time he had seen Baekhyun, he’d convinced himself it was just a one-time thing; it was a short-lived crush and Baekhyun would be out of his life and not coming back into it. And even though they’d kept in touch a lot, he didn’t really think about having to see Baekhyun again, because they’d both been busy with school and other things and they weren’t best buds who would go out of their way to see each other. They were just some sort of friends. Now Baekhyun was there again though, and Chanyeol was going to have to come to terms with the fact that this wasn’t a little crush that was going to go away. He was going to have to go through the whole thing until Baekhyun left for good or he got over it. This was not a very appealing idea to him at all. Chanyeol really hated having crushes.)

He wasn’t going to let his birthday be ruined by annoying friends and even more annoying feelings towards the one not annoying friend he had. (Although when Kyungsoo showed up he was reminded that not all of his friends were unbearable; and Kyungsoo had a calming effect on Jongin, which brought things down to normal.) With Kyungsoo’s arrival, Chanyeol’s mom brought out a birthday cake and they all sang for him and he blew out his candles (and refused to tell anyone his wish, of course). They ate cake for lunch and the moment they were done Chanyeol was immediately badgered into opening his presents. Even Baekhyun got in on it, whining teasingly for Chanyeol to open his card.

“Well, since Baekhyun is my boyfriend, it would be rude not to read his card first,” Chanyeol announced, quietly because even if his parents weren’t in the room he didn’t want them to hear anything about boyfriends. Even as a joke, they would get mad. Baekhyun, however, beamed and gave a cheer for his special status, handing Chanyeol his card.

“Happy birthday Chanyeol!” he grinned. “My birthday is May sixth, just so we don’t make any accidental dates then.” Chanyeol nodded slowly, ripping open the envelope containing his card. It was handmade, which Chanyeol always liked. On the front it just said Happy birthday Chanyeol!, but inside there was a long message, which Chanyeol grinned at the sight of.

“You can read it out loud, if you want,” Baekhyun told him happily. So Chanyeol did (after taking a moment to admire Baekhyun’s adorable handwriting).

“Dear Chanyeol,

Happy birthday~~~~ I only made this last night because you only told me yesterday it was your birthday, but I still hope your birthday is awesome and being seventeen will be really fun for you. Obviously it will, because I’m at your party and you’ll get to hang out with me all year~ ;) Anyway, I know I’m a crappy boyfriend for not even getting you a present, but I kind of think I’m a present just showing up, right? ㅋㅋㅋ Just kidding. I’ll make it up to you somehow.

I’m really happy I met you at camp and got to know you and stuff, because you looked really scary (sorry!) and you were kind of intimidating, but it turns out you’re actually really cool! And I even got a boyfriend out of it, so no complaints ;) But really, I hope we’ll be able to hang out more in the future because you’re pretty great and I, of course, am extremely great (ㅋㅋㅋㅋ) and together we are unstoppable! ㅎㅎ

Happy happy happy birthday Chanyeol~~

From, your coolest (boy)friend :P Baekhyun~”

Chanyeol was squealing like an idiot inside, but he did his best to remain composed. (Did Baekhyun mean it about them hanging out all year? Would he really get to see him again – maybe a lot?) On the other side of the page, there was a cartoonish drawing of a very tall boy with wild hair and a wide grin, and a shorter boy with a bright smile and crescents for eyes, holding up a V sign.

“Your hair was pretty crazy when we met,” Baekhyun admitted, glancing up at Chanyeol’s now shorter, natural hair. “I’m kind of glad you changed it. It was like you’d had frizzy hair and someone did a bad crimp job on it. But it’s nice now,” he assured as Chanyeol hid his face in his hands. Stupid ugly hairstyle. It was a bad phase, okay?

When Baekhyun was done teasing, they moved on to his other friends. Chanyeol received a very cute giraffe doll from Kyungsoo (because Kyungsoo always called him giraffe), and then Sehun and Jongin gave him a poorly wrapped box containing about ten band-aids, a handful of cotton balls, and some very ugly gloves. They also gave him a weird card with shirtless guys on it and recorded messages in pitch-shifted voices (saying things like “I know you pee in the shower” and “Happy St Patrick’s Day!”). Baekhyun seemed to find it hilarious, otherwise Chanyeol literally would have killed them. Anyway, they ended up bringing him out a real present – a huge, gray scarf – and Chanyeol decided they were allowed to stay. At least for now.

With present-giving out of the way, they had a lot of time to kill before they left for paintballing at three. Therefore, Chanyeol immediately suggested they all go up to his room (because he kind of really liked the idea of having Baekhyun in his room, even if they weren’t alone) and play video games. Everyone agreed with this, and soon Chanyeol was setting up Mario Kart as the others all fought for a space on his bed. Kyungsoo didn’t even bother, immediately plunking himself in Chanyeol’s moon chair. He also gave up the first turn of playing, since Chanyeol only had four remotes anyway.

“We’ll rotate who’s on,” Chanyeol promised him from where he was sitting on the floor in front of Baekhyun (it had been Baekhyun’s idea!). Baekhyun immediately offered to take turns with Kyungsoo, switching every other race. Then they split into teams – Jongin and Sehun versus the other three. Jongin was definitely the best player, though Kyungsoo was a close match, and Chanyeol and Sehun’s skills were pretty equal. They would have to see where Baekhyun’s skills lay, because he apparently hadn’t played before.

It turned out he was really bad. Like, really. He was last every round he was in, yelling and laughing the whole time, and everyone laughed at him every time he fell off the course or slipped on a banana peel. Chanyeol was kind of proud the way he never even seemed to get frustrated, accepting his terrible fate of twelfth place (even on Rainbow Road, when he was still on his first lap when everyone else had finished). One time he was lucky and got eleventh, and he went on about it the whole next game. Chanyeol had to resist the urge to pat his head and tell him he was great.

After an hour of racing, and with still over an hour to go before they were leaving, they switched games, turning over to Rock Band. This time, everyone was able to join in, with Jongin and Sehun opting for their usual guitar and bass respectively, Chanyeol on drums, and Kyungsoo grabbing the mic. Baekhyun was happy to be on the other mic – never previously used, though Kyungsoo always jokingly tried to make his friends sing and play at the same time. According to Baekhyun, singing was a lot easier than racing. (“Speak for yourself,” said Jongin.) So he took the higher harmonies and Kyungsoo was on the main vocals and they started.

Chanyeol might have messed up many times when Baekhyun began singing. If he’d been doubting whether or not Baekhyun was an angel before, he was sure he’d just had it confirmed. Only when Jongin started yelling at him about being in the red (which was very not normal for constant 95% plus scoring Chanyeol) did he refocus on beating out the rhythm and try not to get so caught up in the perfection that was Baekhyun’s voice.

At the end of the first song, Kyungsoo turned to Baekhyun and said, “You’re a really good singer,” giving him one of his rarely sweet smiles.

“Thank you!” Baekhyun chimed, blowing him a kiss playfully. “So are you!”

“Chanyeol, why do you so much today?” Jongin complained, reaching to poke him with his guitar. He shot a glance at Baekhyun. “Normally Chanyeol is actually decent, but I guess your fabulous voice was too much for him.”

Chanyeol threw his drumstick at him. “That’s not why at all!” he said defensively. Jongin had been joking, he knew, but Chanyeol could still feel himself blushing because that was why. “I was just giving you losers a chance to not be last for once. I’m sure you get tired of all the time.” This was true; Jongin and Sehun were always around the seventies area, while him and Kyungsoo swept up the better percentages. “And I still got a better score than you!”

“By one percent!” Jongin noted whinily.

Kyungsoo was rolling his eyes as the two bickered, picking out a song without bothering to ask them. When he had decided on one, they were still fighting and he said quietly, “Okay, I’m ready to go.” That was enough for Jongin’s attention to be snapped up, sticking his tongue out at Chanyeol and throwing his drumstick back to (or rather, at) him.

“Don’t let my voice mess you up this time,” Baekhyun joked, winking at Chanyeol before facing the screen again.

“I’ll try,” Chanyeol replied, though it came out weaker than he’d been going for.

Several songs went by, and Chanyeol still hadn’t fully gotten over Baekhyun’s voice when his dad was calling them to go. It was only when the five of them went downstairs that Chanyeol realized there wasn’t room for all of them plus his dad in the car. But Baekhyun was less than worried.

“It’s no big deal, I can just follow you guys in my car,” he said casually. “Actually! I mean, I can always just drive us, unless your dad wanted to join in on the action.” Chanyeol’s dad was shaking his head, and Baekhyun grinned. “Cool! Just tell me where to go, then.”

“No, no,” Chanyeol argued hurriedly. “It’s all the way out in Gwangju, I don’t wanna make you drive that far.”

“Well it’s that or we take two cars,” Baekhyun pointed out. “Which is kind of a waste, don’t you think?”

And so that was how Chanyeol ended up in the front seat of Baekhyun’s car for the second time in his life, pulling up directions on his phone to the paintball area in Gwangju. Kyungsoo, being the smallest, sat less enthusiastically in the middle of the back row, putting in his headphones while everyone chatted around him.

“It seems like unless he’s singing, Kyungsoo’s kinda quiet,” Baekhyun pointed out, and Chanyeol nodded. “He’s not just like this because of me or anything, right?”

“No, he’s always this way,” Chanyeol assured him. “Kyungsoo’s quiet, Jongin is loud, and Sehun’s a mix but always a sarcastic brat either way.” He felt someone smack him, and didn’t have to turn to guess who it was. Baekhyun chuckled.

“So where do you fall, then?”

Before Chanyeol could reply, Jongin started ranting about how Chanyeol was all over the place; sometimes loud, sometimes (rarely) quiet. “But mostly he’s the same as me, and don’t even act like you’re not, Park Chanyeol.”

Chanyeol just scoffed to hide his blush. Jongin made him sound like a total spaz. “Whatever man. You’re still way more annoying than I could ever even dream of.” He heard Jongin mutter an uh-huh, but said nothing further, and Baekhyun looked amused but pleased with his answer.

A few wrong turns and several miles later, they found the place they were looking for with a happy cheer from Baekhyun. (Chanyeol was beginning to wonder where all his happiness spouted from; maybe being impossibly cute made him feel great all the time.) They were ten minutes early, but that gave them time to gear up and go over instructions, and at three thirty they were ready to hit the field (or forest) and beginning attacking. When everyone had scattered and was in hiding, a whistle blew and the game began.

Chanyeol had initially made it his personal goal to use all of his ammo on Kim Jongin only, because that’s what best friends did (and because Jongin was annoying and definitely had it coming). He sort of forgot about the part where it was his birthday and he was inevitably going to be everyone’s target, but this fact made itself clear very quickly, and within two minutes he was warding off all the other boys. Eventually, Sehun and Kyungsoo seemed to team up on Jongin, but Chanyeol thought Baekhyun hadn’t even tried to hit anyone else but him. Only in a flurry of suddenly being grouped up on again by his other friends did he lose sight of Baekhyun, and he was unable to find him for a few minutes.

Jongin was the first to run out of ammo, and Chanyeol almost died at his face when he realized this. He ended up running as Sehun began shooting his remaining paintballs at him, and Kyungsoo grinned evilly, shooting the younger boy once and going to find cover so he could continue to attack Chanyeol. Chanyeol did the same, but as he hid behind a tree, a paintball hit him from behind, yet when he looked around there was no one there. But then another one hit him, and a third, and he realized they were coming from above. He glanced up, and up on a high branch in a tree a few meters away, Byun Baekhyun was perching and laughing, his gun pointed at Chanyeol.

“You - you!” Chanyeol spluttered, spinning his own gun to aim at the other. Baekhyun laughed and shot him again. Chanyeol returned fire, and Baekhyun grinned when paint splattered on his shin. He aimed higher, hitting Baekhyun’s chest, and then he shot several times and for a second Baekhyun was laughing harder, but then his eyes widened as his balance swayed and he gave a yelp as he pitched backwards.

Chanyeol shouted, running forward as if to catch Baekhyun, but the boy never came down. When Chanyeol reached his tree, he was still up there, laughing again, having landed on a large branch just behind the one he’d been on. In a moment, he swung out of the tree, landing less than gracefully as he continued to giggle.

“So much for that plan,” he said, and then he took off, shooting behind him, laugh carrying back to Chanyeol and temporarily mesmerizing him. It took a few seconds for him to start chasing after Baekhyun, firing and having a fifty-fifty hit-miss ratio. They didn’t get far before Chanyeol ran out of paintballs, and he made an obvious sound upon figuring it out, and then Baekhyun was the one chasing him. It turned out Chanyeol’s long legs were no match for Baekhyun’s stealth, and soon he was being tackled to the ground before he was rolled over to face the older.

“Mercy!” he cried as Baekhyun held his gun to him threateningly, an evil smirk on his face. Chanyeol forgot to be mock-scared for a moment as he took in their positions, Baekhyun’s knees on either side of his hips and certain body parts dangerously close together. Baekhyun didn’t seem to notice it at all, because he just continued to grin victoriously.

“Do you admit defeat?” Baekhyun asked.

“Yes,” Chanyeol croaked, and Baekhyun moved his gun away, raising his arms in the air with a cheer. As he did so, a ball of paint exploded against his chest, and he stared down at it in shock, before looking up to see Kyungsoo twenty feet away, smirking. Baekhyun gasped and grabbed his chest dramatically before collapsing on top of Chanyeol, playing dead.

Chanyeol’s heart didn’t stop racing until Baekhyun had removed himself from him.

(And Kyungsoo was announced the winner, the only one with any ammo still left since Baekhyun and Chanyeol had emptied theirs on each other and Sehun had done the same with Jongin. Kyungsoo was happy to shoot his remaining few on the already paint-covered Jongin, and Jongin grumbled but didn’t complain, because it was Kyungsoo and well, yeah.)

“

The rest of the day went by without any more scary Baekhyun-being-too-close incidences. They returned to Yangcheon and got something to eat, then headed to the movies. When that was over, Sehun and Kyungsoo went home for the night and Baekhyun drove back to Chanyeol’s with him and Jongin (since he was sleeping over). Baekhyun wished him a happy birthday once more, and then he was gone as if he’d never been.

Chanyeol wasn’t sure he wanted to face Jongin.

He knew Jongin wasn’t blind, but if Jongin had noticed the way Chanyeol acted around Baekhyun, he didn’t say anything about it. Then again, Jongin didn’t know Chanyeol was gay, so maybe he wasn’t so suspicious.

Still, Chanyeol had a feeling he knew.

After his birthday, Baekhyun seemed more comfortable asking Chanyeol if he wanted to hang out, and it became a sort of regular thing. Baekhyun only lived a fifteen minute drive away, and he didn’t mind driving down to Chanyeol’s house so they could play video games or just do whatever at his home. He also liked taking Chanyeol out places, to malls and karaoke and little shops and odd restaurants and sometimes the movies. A couple of times they even went into the heart of Seoul, spending Saturday afternoons wandering around and looking at everything. Sometimes Jongin or the others would join them, but mostly it was just Chanyeol and Baekhyun.

And if Chanyeol had any hope that his crush on the older would go away, he soon discovered that it was growing rather than passing. At some point – he thought it was around Valentine’s Day, when they hung out together because they were both single anyway – Chanyeol realized his crush had passed. Because he didn’t have all the fluffy feelings of a silly crush anymore.

He’d fallen in love with Byun Baekhyun.

Maybe he should have backed out then, but he didn’t. Instead, he applied for Bucheon University without telling Baekhyun, and got his acceptance letter a month later. He didn’t even know if Baekhyun was planning on going there, if he’d even be staying in Bucheon or if he would go to another province or another country. Even though Baekhyun talked a lot, he never mentioned anything about university, and Chanyeol wasn’t sure if it was because it just slipped his mind or because he was hoping their friendship would end once they got to post-secondary. Chanyeol really hoped it was the former.

Eventually, he knew he was going to have to tell Baekhyun, one way or the other. Baekhyun deserved to know how Chanyeol felt about him, and Chanyeol couldn’t keep it up forever if he wanted to. Or maybe he could, but he just didn’t want to. Either way, Baekhyun should be allowed to have a say in the whole thing, because it was very possible he wouldn’t want anything to do with Chanyeol if he knew how he felt about him. Maybe if Chanyeol thought he would get over Baekhyun one day, he wouldn’t tell him, but the way things were going… It felt like he only liked him more every day.

With this thought in mind, Chanyeol sort of got in the habit of jotting down his thoughts whenever he could in an attempt to organize them for when he would finally tell Baekhyun. He probably wrote a hundred letters and lines on scrap pieces of paper. Eventually he stuck them all in a binder, so when he would want to sit and try to write his speech properly he could have all his thoughts together.

Months passed, and before he knew it exams were over and summer had arrived. Baekhyun had promised to spend lots of time with him during break, but in the first week of holidays Chanyeol’s life was very drastically changed.

He had been in the midst of writing down another letter – because he was planning on telling Baekhyun before summer ended and he knew he had to get it written out soon – when Jongin and Kyungsoo stopped by to ask him to come out with them. Without thinking, he’d left his writings on his desk and hurried out after them, carefree. And it had been a fun outing – even though Jongin acted different around Kyungsoo without Sehun there (the youngest was on vacation with his family), and Chanyeol had sort of just ended up feeling like a third wheel. (Really, if the two didn’t started dating soon – well, if Jongin didn’t ‘fess up soon, Chanyeol was just going to out him himself. [Though not really.]) After a while though, Jongin became kind of unbearable for Chanyeol, and he wasn’t sure how Kyungsoo was holding up so well but maybe that meant Kyungsoo liked him too. Regardless, Chanyeol ended up leaving the two alone and kind of hoped by the end of the night they would figure themselves out.

Inexplicable dread filled him the moment he walked through the front door of his home. The air was nearly palpably thick with horrible tension, and he suddenly felt like leaving and going back to find Jongin and Kyungsoo. He had a feeling he’d rather put up with them than face whatever was ahead of him.

This instinct turned out to be very right indeed.

His mother called him into the kitchen, and he didn’t like the sound of her voice; it was her I’m-very-mad-but-doing-my-best-to-stay-calm voice, and that meant trouble. And he kind of already knew why; he’d kind of been expecting it ever since he’d met Baekhyun, but it didn’t make it any easier when his mother began yelling the moment she saw him and his father didn’t yell but Chanyeol knew he was very angry too. By the end of a good ten minutes of yelling and scolding, he was told not to call himself a Park anymore in relation to this family. He was given an hour to pack whatever he would need, and then he would no longer be welcome in this house.

When he went up to his room, he caught sight of all his letters scattered across his desk, and felt very sick. (As if he hadn’t been already.) He didn’t really know what to do with himself now, so he sat on his bed and cried for about twenty minutes, hoping to clear his head after letting out his emotions. It worked a bit, enough for him to get his head on and begin packing a large suitcase full with his clothing, and then his backpack with all the other things he needed. With everything ready to go, Chanyeol sat down again, trying (and failing) not to cry while he tried to come up with a plan for himself.

He didn’t have a lot of options. Sehun was gone, Jongin and Kyungsoo were together and Chanyeol didn’t really feel like going to them anymore. He thought about Baekhyun, but told himself against any ideas involving the boy. Still, his mind pondered it anyway.

A few months ago, Chanyeol wouldn’t have felt close enough to Baekhyun to ever ask anything of him. However, since his birthday they’d grown closer, and he thought he was just as good as friends with Baekhyun as he was with Sehun and Kyungsoo (though not Jongin; he was sort of irreplaceable, unfortunately). At least for a day or so – until Chanyeol could get on his feet again, bug Jongin into letting him stay with him until he could get a job and find his own place – it would be okay to stay at Baekhyun’s, right?

Not fully in control of his voice, Chanyeol opted to text Baekhyun rather than call him. “Hey Baek hyung, would it be alright if I stayed at your place for the night?”

He was half-expecting Baekhyun to say no, or not answer him at all. A moment later, though, his phone went off and he read the boy’s message with a small smile.

“Sure ^^ Are your parents gonna drop you or did you want me to pick you up?”

Chanyeol felt a bit guilty as he replied, “Would you come get me?” But Baekhyun just said Sure! again, and promised to see him in fifteen or so minutes.

Meanwhile, Chanyeol only had a couple minutes until his hour was up and he was no longer welcome in his house, so he dragged himself and his suitcase and backpack downstairs, slipped on his shoes and headed out the door. Not feeling like staying anywhere near his house, he began walking slowly down the sidewalk in the direction he knew Baekhyun would be coming from, eventually stopping on the corner at a bus stop and trying not to look as miserable as he felt.

Utterly alone with his thoughts, it was a real challenge not to burst into tears sitting there. Evidently, he knew one day he would leave his parents’ home, and he would tell them he was gay. It was only a matter of time before he was facing this. However, it was so sudden; he’d always imagined he would have long-since moved out, managed to prepare himself for this before it would happen. Instead, it was happening right now, and it felt very final, and in the span of an hour he’d gone from having a home and family to having nothing but a suitcase and bag of a few belongings. The life he had known – the life he had always known and was all he’d known – was now gone with a brutal end and a rough start to a questionable beginning. He wasn’t sure what happened from here.

However, he told himself not to mourn the past too much, and to look forward to what would come next. The worst of it was over, at least he hoped.

Anyway, he’d gone through it once now; if he had to do it again – when it came to Baekhyun and his other friends – he’d be able to make it out again alright. Right?

Right.  

“

Around the time he felt kind of put-together again, Baekhyun pulled up around the corner, hitting his brakes as he spotted Chanyeol in the remains of dying sunlight. Not noticing him, Baekhyun honked at Chanyeol and the younger glanced up before scrambling to his feet. In seconds, Baekhyun was out of the car, giving him a tentative smile.

“What’s all this?” he asked gently, gesturing to Chanyeol’s suitcase. Chanyeol opened his mouth to answer, but he found his words didn’t want to come out. Instead, he just shook his head.

“I don’t wanna talk about it,” he mumbled, and Baekhyun’s seemingly permanent smile disappeared, replaced by a worrying frown. He had finally seemed to notice Chanyeol’s gloomy demeanour.

“Hey, are you okay?” Baekhyun said softly, and Chanyeol just shook his head slightly. Without asking anything more, Baekhyun stepped forward and wrapped his arms around his torso, holding onto him for a long moment. Chanyeol didn’t move for several seconds, but then he rested his chin on the top of Baekhyun’s head and sighed softly, feeling his eyes water. “It’s alright, ‘Yeol…”

It wasn’t really – it wasn’t at all – but Chanyeol whispered, “I know…”

“Let’s go back to my place,” Baekhyun suggested, letting go and offering a careful smile. He took Chanyeol’s suitcase from his hand and tossed it into the back seat of his car, and Chanyeol threw his bag in after it, heading around the car to the passenger seat.

Chanyeol had never been to Baekhyun’s house. Since Baekhyun always drove down, it seemed inconvenient for him to go to Chanyeol’s and back twice, so they would always stay in Yangcheon. He’d never even been to Bucheon, like, in his whole life. It was clear Chanyeol didn’t feel like talking, but Baekhyun the radio and sang quietly, which was soothing for the younger’s heart.

Soon Baekhyun was pulling into a driveway and shutting off the engine, giving Chanyeol another tender smile. “Home sweet home,” he said. Chanyeol gave a tiny smile of his own, but it was half-hearted at best. At the sight, Baekhyun reached out and touched Chanyeol’s hand lightly. “It’s alright,” he repeated quietly, and Chanyeol just nodded. “Let’s go inside, okay?”

Baekhyun got out, taking Chanyeol’s suitcase and backpack for him even though Chanyeol insisted that he could grab his own bags. He led them up to the door, and when he reached it he turned back to give Chanyeol a quick grin. “I’ve been meaning to invite you here for a while,” he admitted. “It’s not super exciting or anything, but…” He shrugged. “Anyway, I’m happy you’re here now.” With that, he let them inside.

Indeed, Baekhyun’s house wasn’t anything spectacular. It had a basic layout, but it still felt very nice, very… home-like. There were photos of Baekhyun, and another boy who had to be Baekhyun’s older brother because it looked so much like him, and the two of them with two adults. There were photos of other people, and photos and pictures of things that weren’t people at all, just decorative art. Chanyeol liked that. In his house there were a few family photos, and school pictures of Chanyeol and his sister, but no informal, fun family photos like Baekhyun had. And there was nothing else besides crosses and pictures of white Jesus and Biblical events. Everything on Baekhyun’s walls made it seem like real people – with real interests – lived here. That was nice.

And when Baekhyun led him into the living room, the two adults featured in some of the pictures were there in real life, sitting comfortably together on a couch. The man was reading the newspaper – or maybe he was doing a crossword puzzle in the paper – and the woman was drinking a tea and watching a show quietly. When Baekhyun appeared in the doorway, they glanced his way, both offering him a smile. He dragged Chanyeol into view so that rather than going back to their own things, the man put the paper down and the woman muted the TV, giving their full attention.

“Who’s this?” the woman asked lightly.

“This is Chanyeol,” Baekhyun introduced. “’Yeol, these are my parents.” Chanyeol had guessed as much, but he still bowed respectfully. “He’s gonna sleep over, okay?” he added to the other two.

“That’s good to know,” his mom said with a smile, somewhat teasing.

“In your room?” his father asked. Baekhyun nodded. “Are you sure he’ll fit?”

“I’ll make him fit,” Baekhyun said, and Chanyeol thought he heard his dad mutter, Good luck. He felt like he was missing something here.

He found out a moment later when he walked into Baekhyun’s room. “What,” was all he managed to say.

“Don’t judge me,” Baekhyun said, looking a bit embarrassed.

For the most part, Baekhyun seemed to have a pretty normal room. Clothes here and there on the floor, a few books on a shelf and several movies on another, a couple band and movie posters plastered on his walls. However, where his bed was supposed to be was a (very ugly) sheet pitched up over the mattress. Were he to go under the sheet (which he would eventually), he would see what was holding it up was a long cardboard box leaning against the bed, a couple nails in the wall, and some branches (seriously). Chanyeol wasn’t even sure how it was keeping itself together, but it looked very terrible and likely to fall down if he blew on it.

“I know it’s not pretty, but it’s nice inside,” Baekhyun told him as Chanyeol continued to stare wordlessly, temporarily forgetting having been kicked out of his house less than an hour earlier in favour of being amused and a little concerned for Baekhyun’s sake.

“That is probably the ugliest sheet I’ve ever seen,” Chanyeol said. “And… just, what?” The sheet really was bad; it was a gross shade of green with blue and purple and white flower patterns. And the whole thing just looked lumpy and weird… Why had Baekhyun ever done this?

“I hate the sheet too, but it’s kind of all I had at the time, and I don’t feel like changing it now.” Baekhyun tried to shrug like it was no big deal, like he wasn’t blushing under Chanyeol’s judgmental gaze. “Everyone always laughs at me, but I like my fort. I feel… safe inside.”

“You’re kinda weird, you know that?” Chanyeol said, but he didn’t really think it was a bad thing. Baekhyun seemed proud of his weird bed fort, and he liked that, even if Baekhyun was looking slightly ashamed now.

“Well then, you don’t have to sleep in there! You can sleep on the floor and I will sleep in my fort and be happy just fine without you.”

“No, that’s okay,” Chanyeol said, and he gave a tiny grin.

“Mhm.” Baekhyun grinned back. “Anyway, you put some pjs on and I’ll go get us some snacks, and we can hang out in my fort.”

Chanyeol smiled, genuinely even though he hardly felt like it, because Baekhyun was sweet and he hadn’t even asked any questions, just invited him into his home like it was no big deal even though he knew something was wrong. But when Baekhyun was gone the smile slipped away, and Chanyeol changed like he was told and sat at the end of the bed, a bit afraid to actually go into the “fort”. Baekhyun came back with a huge bowl of barbecue chips (which he said were all he could find, but they were Chanyeol’s favourite and he didn’t mind at all) and a half-empty two liter bottle of root beer, assuring Chanyeol it was okay if they drank it all. Then he pushed Chanyeol into the little fort and followed in after him, and soon the two were safe under the tented sheet.

“So, ‘Yeol,” Baekhyun offered him the bowl of chips. Chanyeol took a handful, eating them one at a time to make them last (though the bowl Baekhyun had was enough for five people, easily). “Did you want to tell me what’s going on?” His eyes were burning with concern, but Chanyeol could tell he was trying to keep things light for his sake. “You don’t have to, but I’ll listen if you do.”

Chanyeol shrugged, chewing on a single chip for far longer than necessary, until it was just mush in his mouth. “I… got in a fight with my parents,” he said quietly. It had hardly been a fight – he had barely spoken a word to them the whole time; mostly, it had been his mother yelling at him about what a disgrace he was. But it was close enough to the truth. “They kicked me out, and told me not to come back.”

“Oh.” It was almost inaudible, and Chanyeol felt a kick of nervousness. It wasn’t like he’d told Baekhyun the reason for his being cast out, but it was like Baekhyun already knew. There was no judgment in his face, just worry and sadness. “Why?”

He’d expected that, but he still didn’t know what to tell the older. Gulping, Chanyeol opened his mouth to give some sort of excuse, but he didn’t have one. Just like earlier when Baekhyun had picked him up, he shook his head. Baekhyun just nodded, taking his hand and giving it a squeeze.

“Do you wanna watch a movie?” he asked instead.

“Okay.”

Baekhyun nodded again, letting go of him. “You go pick one, then; I have to get changed too.”

And that was the end of it. Baekhyun didn’t ask anything else during the movie (Chanyeol chose Mulan because he loved that movie and needed something to make him feel better right now; also, he sort of felt like Mulan at the moment), though he did comment that it was probably his favourite Disney movie. They lay in the fort with their heads peeking out the entrance, watching the TV a few feet away, chips and pop easily reachable on the floor in front of them. Part way in, Baekhyun leaned his head on Chanyeol’s shoulder, and stayed like that for the rest of the movie; Chanyeol had to remind himself that Baekhyun was always this way, comfortable and loving skinship, and despite how intimate it felt, Baekhyun was a straight guy with no romantic interest in him.

However, when the movie ended and they lay back in the fort – which was really only big enough for one, and Baekhyun ended up cuddling up close to Chanyeol, arms going around him and face burying into his chest – Chanyeol knew he had to say something. Even if he couldn’t confess to Baekhyun right now, he had to at least tell him part of it.

“Baekhyun,” he whispered, and Baekhyun hummed in acknowledgement. “Baek, I – I’m gay.” Baekhyun stilled, but didn’t say anything. “That’s why my parents made me leave. Because they found out.”

There was no turning back now. If he was anything like Chanyeol’s parents or the people at his church – and Chanyeol had to remind himself that he was religious, too – Baekhyun should freak out and shove him away and end their friendship. 

But he didn’t. Instead, Baekhyun tilted his head back to look up at him in the dark, and said softly, “That’s okay.” Chanyeol felt like his heart shattered with relief hearing that. (He was also a bit relieved when Baekhyun didn’t ask how his parents found out.) He’d been sure Baekhyun would make him go, yell at him just like his parents had, but he didn’t. “That’s okay, Chanyeol,” he repeated, tone still very soft. “There’s nothing wrong with that. I still love you, ‘Yeol.”

“Are you sure?” Chanyeol croaked, words catching in his throat as he was overwhelmed with emotions. Despair at possibly losing his family, anger and frustration that they had reacted how they had when Baekhyun was reacting like this; joy and relief that Baekhyun didn’t hate him, that he wasn’t losing Baekhyun; and so much warmth, warmth that was Byun Baekhyun and his constant loving and happy nature, even now, even like this.

Baekhyun hugged him tighter. “Yeah. What kind of boyfriend would I be if I got mad about you being gay?” That made Chanyeol snort, even though his eyes were watering and he was experiencing a bit of an emotional overload. “That’d sort of be an oxymoron, don’t you think?”

“Yeah… I never told anyone before, Baek.”

Baekhyun grew serious. “Not even Jongin?” Chanyeol shook his head. “Well, I’m glad you told me. It’s gonna be okay, ‘Yeol, I promise.”

Chanyeol wasn’t so sure about that himself. “They said I wasn’t welcome there anymore. I think I’ve been disowned.” He sniffled, wiping at his eyes because they were getting too teary for his own good. Crying wasn’t going to solve anything.

A few seconds later, Baekhyun shifted, a hand running through Chanyeol’s hair. “That’s okay. I mean, it’s not okay, but you don’t have to worry about… You can stay here. I don’t mind if you live here, and my parents will be okay with it. Ever since my brother moved out, they’ve always complained about not having two boys to take care of anymore. You can stay here, and then go on residence or something when school starts. What school are you going to?”

“I…” Chanyeol felt like if he told Baekhyun, the older would figure out he liked him, and then he would change his mind about accepting Chanyeol’s uality. But it was sort of unavoidable. “I’m going to BCU.”

“Bucheon University?” Baekhyun asked, unbelieving, and Chanyeol made a tiny affirmative noise. “That’s where I’m going! That’s so awesome,” he added excitedly, trying to keep his voice down. “Seriously, you can just live here until you graduate, then. What field are you gonna be in?”

Wow. So much for Baekhyun thinking he was a creep or something. But gosh, Chanyeol was feeling very overwhelmed, and had to bury his face in Baekhyun’s hair for a while, holding him very tightly and trying to contain his sobs, because Baekhyun was seriously so wonderful and he was treating Chanyeol like he was still a person and still his friend and he hadn’t told him he was going to Hell or anything and Baekhyun was just so unbearably sweet… And Chanyeol was really, really in love with him because he was honestly an angel and it made him want to cry. (He did cry.)

“’Yeol? It’s okay, ‘Yeol, it’s alright… What did I say?”

“It’s not that,” Chanyeol told him, and something in his mind said he shouldn’t be so close to Baekhyun, but he couldn’t let him go. “You’re just – thank you.” He didn’t know what else to say, didn’t know how to say what he wanted to, but Baekhyun seemed to understand.

“It’s no big deal,” he promised. “Really. I don’t mind if you like boys, Chanyeol. It doesn’t make you any different to me.”

“I know,” Chanyeol breathed. “I just really appreciate it.” Baekhyun pulled back, and Chanyeol released him immediately, afraid he’d made the other uncomfortable. However, Baekhyun shuffled up and pressed his forehead to Chanyeol’s, wrapping his arms around his neck. Chanyeol let out a shaky breath, throwing an arm over Baekhyun’s waist. “Anyways, I’m doing engineering stuff. Architecture and stuff.”

“That’s cool,” Baekhyun replied. “I’m going into the art areas. I haven’t really decided, but it’s either clothing, graphics, or advertising for me. I’ll try out all three and see what I like best.”

Chanyeol nodded slowly. “But – do you really think I could live here? I don’t want to be a burden-”

“Don’t worry about that,” Baekhyun cut him off. His fingers continued to play in Chanyeol’s hair. “If it bothers you so much, you can get a job and pay rent. But my family is really cool and they won’t mind having you at all. Let’s not think about that tonight though, okay? You’ve got enough going on right now, we’ll figure things out later. Let’s just sleep now.”

And even if Baekhyun said not to think about it, Chanyeol still felt better at his suggestion of paying rent, because if Baekhyun was going to do so much for him, Chanyeol wouldn’t be able to just do nothing in return. Really, though, he couldn’t plan his whole life out right now, and knowing that, he accepted Baekhyun’s advice and decided to go to sleep.

(And even though he felt pretty crappy after his less-than-awesome evening, it felt good to be there with Baekhyun, who accepted him and made wonderful promises and convinced Chanyeol that he would be okay again.)

“

The following morning, Chanyeol woke up pretty disoriented. He was in an unfamiliar, tiny space with another body pressed up beside him, and for a moment all he could see was dark hair and ugly flowers. It was the flowers that reminded him of where he was and who was sleeping beside him, as well as what had happened last night and why he was here and not at his own house. The house he no longer had any claim to. His heart sank, and he clutched at the back of Baekhyun’s shirt.

Baekhyun was still sound asleep, half lying on Chanyeol’s chest and stomach because there really wasn’t enough space for both of them in the bed fort. Despite the cramped quarters, Chanyeol kind of thought he could get used to it all; waking up with Baekhyun, seeing him every day. He could probably even learn to like the ugly flowers (okay, maybe that was a stretch). But he thought he might learn to like this place, anyway.

He had no idea what time it was, because there was no clock visible from the fort, but he heard someone come into Baekhyun’s room, and decided pretending to be asleep was preferable to facing a questioning parent. His eyes closed, and a moment later there was the soft sound of the fort “wall” being lifted. A woman’s voice gently cooed Baekhyun’s name until he stirred, head lifting off Chanyeol’s shoulder as he grumbled incoherently.

“Are you two comfy in there?” his mother asked quietly, sounding amused.

“Yes please go away we’re still sleeping,” Baekhyun mumbled in one breath. “Also Chanyeol’s moving in okay? Okay…”

“Is that so?” his mother replied. She didn’t sound mad or anything, still just amused. “Are you going to explain, or am I just accepting a new son?”

Baekhyun sighed, and then yawned. “Chanyeol’s parents kicked him out and he’s going to BCU with me so I said he can live here.” Then Chanyeol felt Baekhyun’s head weighing down on him again, breaths coasting across his neck.

“What happened that they kicked him out?” The woman’s voice was filled with sympathy. That must have been where Baekhyun got it from. (Actually, Baekhyun seemed a lot like his mom, Chanyeol thought, based on the way she was taking everything. She seemed equally lighthearted and kind. He appreciated that.)

“He’s gay mom,” Baekhyun replied sleepily, and Chanyeol’s heart skipped a beat. “Let us sleep.”

She ruffled his hair lightly. “We’ll talk later, then.” He wondered if that meant she was against him being there or not. He wasn’t sure he wanted to find out.

However, like Baekhyun, his parents seemed to be very accepting of Chanyeol’s uality. They all had a group discussion that day, and Baekhyun’s dad told him it was too bad his parents were so harsh on him, but he was welcome here if he wanted to stay. Then they discussed Chanyeol living there during his schooling years, and eventually agreed that he could stay and wouldn’t have to worry about paying rent unless things started to get too costly. He promised to get a job anyway, and so did Baekhyun, so they could at least help pay for food.

Chanyeol kind of thought Baekhyun’s family was the best.

It didn’t take him long to settle in after that. Baekhyun and his parents were very accommodating, and made sure Chanyeol felt right at home. Although a lot of times Chanyeol felt very upset, homesick and missing his own parents (and his sister, who was living in Seoul now), Baekhyun was always there to comfort him the best he could, constantly letting him know that he still accepted him and thought he was great no matter what his parents said.

“You don’t get to choose your family,” Baekhyun told him one time. “But you choose your friends, and I chose you. Even if when we’d met I knew you were gay, I still would have wanted to be your friend. And I’m sure Jongin and Sehun and Kyungsoo feel the same way. We all love you, because you’re a great person, and that doesn’t change just because of who you like.”

A few days after he first arrived, Baekhyun took him back to Yangcheon, too, so he could see his friends and tell them everything. And Baekhyun was right; his friends were completely fine with him being gay, and it sort of made him want to cry again but they all hugged him and told him he was still their Chanyeol, and he wasn’t any less cool for liking guys. (“You were never cool anyway,” Jongin points out. “So you really didn’t have anything to lose there.” And even though Chanyeol punched him, he was really just glad his best friend wasn’t treating him any differently than before.) After that, he and Baekhyun visited them regularly enough throughout the summer, and when September rolled around Chanyeol promised to come see them sometimes and to always keep in touch.

He didn’t visit his parents all summer, but he hoped maybe he’d see them again one day. Maybe they wouldn’t hate him forever. (Though if they did, he figured they weren’t really worth seeing again.)

Meanwhile, Baekhyun’s parents made Chanyeol feel like he was part of the family. They woke him and Baekhyun up to eat breakfast all together in the morning, and similarly gathered around the table for lunch and dinner. In the evenings he and Baekhyun were welcome to join them to watch TV or play board games and card games (which Chanyeol didn’t think families even did anymore; he had always played with his grandparents whenever him and his sister went to visit them, but his own parents didn’t even seem to have any decks of cards or die or board games). They invited him out whenever they went somewhere, whether it was out for dinner, or grocery shopping (which Chanyeol politely declined and Baekhyun went on to his mom about how no one likes shopping with their parents – and Chanyeol had to break it to him that Jongin loved shopping with his mom), or to church. Chanyeol did go to church with them, even though he was a bit nervous to.

The first time he joined the family, he was a bit taken aback by how different their church was from his. The one he’d gone to – the one he’d been going to for years and had become his standard of expectations for all churches – was far more strict and boring. Baekhyun’s was larger and more upbeat, brighter, livelier, full of energy (and probably the Holy Spirit or whatever). Chanyeol was welcomed by everyone he saw, and Baekhyun introduced him as they moved along to some seats. However, instead of sitting, Baekhyun touched his hand lightly and told him he’d join them later.

“Where are you going?” Chanyeol wondered. Baekhyun just shook his head, giving a mysterious smile.

“You’ll see.” And he hurried down the aisle and away, leaving Chanyeol with his parents to sit awkwardly.

The place grew fuller until there was a hundred or so bodies, and people flurried across the stage, where on the right side a few instruments were set up. Fifteen minutes to ten, those instruments were taken up by various people – some young, some old – playing an upbeat song while two or three others stood in the rest of the stage area singing into microphones. Chanyeol wasn’t familiar with the song, but those in the seats were rising and singing along, so Chanyeol went with it. (The words were projected on a screen, but he didn’t know the tune so he just read along without singing.)

Part way into the song, though, a familiar voice crept into his ears, and he had to peel his eyes off the lyrics to look around. Up on the stage, with a mic and a bright smile, Baekhyun had joined the other singers and was singing himself, looking comfortable and happy. Chanyeol couldn’t help the grin that broke out at the sight of him, and a moment later Baekhyun seemed to notice his eyes on him, because he looked his way and smiled wider, waving.

For maybe half an hour they sang before they were directed to sit and the service began. Even it was better than the services Chanyeol had sat through (and sometimes fallen asleep through) before. The pastor was energetic and his teachings relevant, and by the end of it Chanyeol felt very enlightened and understanding of why Baekhyun was so appreciative of their religion.

He expected Baekhyun to come sit with them once the pastor took the stage, but he stayed up there for a while until the pastor announced they would take the offering. At this point, all the singers and band members finally left the stage – except Baekhyun. He took the place of the keyboardist, sitting on a stool and beginning to play a chord.

“Good morning,” he said warmly into the mic. “I just wanted to tell you all that I brought my friend Chanyeol with me, and I hope you’ll all be really nice to him so he’ll want to come back again. So if you’re wondering who that good-looking guy is with my parents – it’s not me for once.” The crowd laughed, and Chanyeol gave a smile even though he was feeling kind of embarrassed being in the spotlight (because there were lots of people turning to look at him now). With that, Baekhyun began singing and Chanyeol was allowed to forget his embarrassment and just enjoy the God-given gift that was Baekhyun’s voice.

When the song ended, he finally left the stage, appearing in a doorway a moment later and hurrying down the aisle to sit with them again. He passed Chanyeol to sit between him and his mom, and his mom threw an arm over his shoulder to give him a brief side hug. Chanyeol touched his knee carefully, and Baekhyun turned to flash a smile at him.

“That was really great,” he whispered, and Baekhyun looked very pleased, hand going over Chanyeol’s absently.

“Thanks!” he said back softly. “I don’t usually sing – I mean, I’m on stage every week, but I don’t usually do the offering song, you know? I was really excited about it, since you’re here today.” And even if Chanyeol had hated this church (which he absolutely did not), he would come back at the promise of hearing Baekhyun sing every Sunday.

After the service – near the end of which Baekhyun had gone back up on stage as the band played a final song while everyone began to get up and leave – Chanyeol stood awkwardly as what seemed like the entire congregation came up to him (some of whom he’d met before the service). When he finally caught a break, he made towards the stage, standing beside it and watching Baekhyun interacting with the other singers, going over parts of songs and just chatting. Baekhyun looked at ease as always, and at one point Chanyeol thought he heard him say his name; he must have, because a moment later his eyes were scanning for him, and then he saw him at the edge of the stage and beckoned him up. Chanyeol looked uncertain but Baekhyun called him again and he hesitantly went up the stairs. In a minute he was being bombarded with the names of other singers and the band.

The moment they were close enough, Baekhyun’s fingers slipped into his casually, and he looked up to smile at him in his usual sunny manner. When was that not going to have an effect on him? Chanyeol looked away, and caught one of the singers quirking an eyebrow at Baekhyun.

“What?” Baekhyun shot at her jokingly. “I can’t hold his hand?” She just shrugged, seeming amused. “Haven’t I told you? ‘Yeollie’s my boyfriend; I’m like, obligated to hold his hand.”

The girl laughed. “No way. He’s way too good-looking to ever go for a guy like you,” she teased. “If he were actually gay, anyway.”

“He is actually gay,” Baekhyun returned, and there was a little less lightheartedness in his voice. He sounded almost a bit… challenging.

“Oh,” was all the girl had to say. “Well, he’s still too good-looking for you.” Baekhyun eased up again. And no one even further mentioned that Chanyeol was gay. It wasn’t like they were avoiding it because it made them uncomfortable; they just didn’t seem to care one way or another.

Chanyeol couldn’t help thinking there was something wrong with Baekhyun’s church, because they were just so nice and fun and accepting and that wasn’t how their religion was. But maybe it was. Maybe he’d just been going to the wrong church for too long.

Either way, he looked forward to going back to Baekhyun’s church again.

 “

Over the summer, one of Chanyeol’s other new experiences with Baekhyun (one of many) was to meet some of the older’s friends. He wasn’t sure why he thought Baekhyun didn’t have any non-church friends (which was ridiculous because Baekhyun had mentioned his friends before), but it was still odd to meet them and come to terms with not being the only person Baekhyun had. Baekhyun’s friends were pretty nice, though, and he met most of them (the closest ones, anyway) one day when he and Baekhyun were invited over to go swimming at his friend Jongdae’s.

“Jongdae is my Jongin,” Baekhyun told him on the way over. “Annoying best friend who I’m stuck with.”

Jongdae was also, it turned out, Baekhyun’s only friend who was the same age as him. Unlike Chanyeol, all of Baekhyun’s other friends (and he had more than just three) were a year older than him. Chanyeol was quickly introduced to Kim Jongdae, a boy Baekhyun’s size with a mischievous smile; Kim Joonmyun, a very polite guy who was apparently a total nerd; Kris Wu, who only looked really cool, but was actually not (according to Baekhyun; Chanyeol thought he seemed cool anyway); and Kim Minseok, the only “normal” one. This was only a handful of Baekhyun’s friends, yet still more than Chanyeol had.

They all made Chanyeol feel like he was part of their circle, which was really meaningful to Chanyeol. (It was also a nice distraction from a shirtless Baekhyun; Baekhyun was really comfortable around him, and changed in front of him all the time, but it was still a sight Chanyeol enjoyed a little too much.) As it was, Jongdae was also going to BCU with him and Baekhyun, though he was entering the arts area with Baekhyun. Still, they would get to hang out a fair bit.

“But Seok-hyung is at the university, and he’s taking architecture too!” Baekhyun said excitedly. “I mean, he’s in his second year now, but he can probably help you with whatever, right hyung?” Minseok nodded and offered a thumbs up from where he was lying in a reclining chair, cell phone in hand. Baekhyun pulled a face. “He’s not stuck up, I promise,” he told Chanyeol. “He’s just too busy talking to his bestie and ignoring us. You get used to it.”

“Quit filling the poor kid with your stories,” Minseok called, and Baekhyun tried to splash him, though the water fell short of his feet. “And I have a good excuse to be talking to him and not you.”

Baekhyun rolled his eyes. “Whatever.” Then he explained, “His best friend’s gone to China all summer, visiting his family, so Seok-hyung is all sad and lonely. Once school starts, he’ll be bearable again.”

Eventually, Baekhyun got out of the pool and snuck up on the older, stealing his phone and throwing the boy in the water, cackling evilly. Chanyeol couldn’t help but notice how Baekhyun was a bit more trouble-making, more attitude-filled with his other friends; he rolled his eyes sometimes, scowled jokingly, teased a little more aggressively. Around Chanyeol, Baekhyun had never been anything but sunny, and he still was with them, just not as much. That was to be expected, of course – he’d known these guys longer, was more comfortable with them, and Chanyeol was the same way with his own friends – but it made Chanyeol wonder if Baekhyun was putting on an act so he would think he was nicer, or if he was just naturally very warm towards Chanyeol.

It was too much assuming and uncertainty for Chanyeol to raise his hopes for. He would just accept Baekhyun’s warmth and not worry about the why aspect of it.

It was hard, though. Somewhere along the lines of summer – spending every day with Baekhyun, having the boy curl up to him too close at night even though it was hot and even hotter in the fort, and with Baekhyun’s warm smiles and soft touches for no evident reasons – Chanyeol managed to convince his heart that his feelings may not be totally unrequited. Which in itself was very dangerous. Because when the school year finally arrived and they were forced to go back to a place where there were many people – many girls – Chanyeol had to watch as Baekhyun’s eyes lingered and he gave his smiles to pretty girls. He had to see Baekhyun talking sweetly to them, had to hear about how cute so-and-so was. And he was reminded of how very straight Baekhyun was, despite how accepting he was of Chanyeol and how he treated him like he would any friend even though he was gay.

For Chanyeol, who had already gone in way too deep, deluding himself to some extremely unrealistic fantasy, it was hard to go back to school, back to real life.

Things got worse when Baekhyun told him, in just the second week of school, that he had a date that Friday. Apparently, Baekhyun had never gone on dates before, and now he was a university student he definitely wanted to start. (He promised to keep his eye out for cute, potentially gay guys for Chanyeol’s sake. Though he told Baekhyun he appreciated the thought, he really just felt like crying.)

On Friday night when Baekhyun came home from his date, Chanyeol asked how it had gone, even though he didn’t really want to hear the answer. Some small part of him was sort of hoping Baekhyun would say he’d hated it. But Baekhyun told him all the highlights, and concluded saying that she was nice, but he probably wouldn’t marry her.

This became their routine. Baekhyun, it turned out, had a taste for going on dates, and had one every other week or so. However, it was never the same girl twice, and Chanyeol wasn’t sure if he was relieved by that or not. Either way, at the end of the night Baekhyun would come home and Chanyeol would ask about it, and Baekhyun would tell him, and then it repeated on the next date. By the third or fourth time, Chanyeol had remembered that he was supposed to tell Baekhyun how he felt about him, and he’d never done it all summer while he was so caught up in everything. He became reluctantly determined once more to tell Baekhyun his feelings, and sometime in mid-October when Baekhyun returned home late on a Friday night, he finally did.

They were lying in bed, their conversations ceased about Baekhyun’s night as they settled in to sleep. Chanyeol took a long time to actually open his mouth, and he was afraid Baekhyun would already have fallen asleep when he spoke (not that he would really mind).

“Baekhyun?”

“Hm?” Baekhyun voice hummed from somewhere around Chanyeol’s chest. He hoped his heart wasn’t beating loud enough for the older to hear.

“I…” He swallowed hard. “I like you.” And he wasn’t even sure he said it, or if Baekhyun heard it, but then Baekhyun was looking up at him with sad, uncertain eyes, wondering if he meant it that way, and Chanyeol just nodded because he couldn’t say it again.

“Okay,” Baekhyun whispered, even though Chanyeol knew it wasn’t okay. Baekhyun’s voice said it was not okay. Still, he repeated, “That’s okay,” though it sounded weak and unsure. “But I don’t… I love you, because you’re great and you’re my friend, but I don’t like you like that. I’m – I like girls. I’m straight, ‘Yeol.”

“I know,” Chanyeol sighed. “I just thought – you should know.” I just hoped you might make an exception. I just thought maybe I could change your mind. I just don’t want to hear about every girl you think you might like, when they aren’t me. Chanyeol hadn’t planned on crying – he hadn’t cried in a while now – but he could feel tears sliding down his face, and heard the soft plup! sounds as they hit Baekhyun’s pillow. In a moment, he felt Baekhyun’s hands brushing at his cheeks, wiping at those tears without saying a word.

He wasn’t sure, but it felt like Baekhyun was snuggled closer than ever to him when he finally fell asleep.

“

Baekhyun didn’t let things grow awkward between them. Just like when Chanyeol had come out to him, the older didn’t treat him any differently after Chanyeol confessed. However, he didn’t go on another date until November, and when Chanyeol asked him about it that night, Baekhyun just told him, “You don’t have to ask me that anymore, ‘Yeol.” From then on, they didn’t talk about Baekhyun’s dates; he didn’t even tell Chanyeol in advance when he had them.

Chanyeol felt a constant, twinging numbness in his heart, and somehow it felt empty but still hurt. He didn’t tell Baekhyun, because the boy would just blame himself and feel guilty even though he’d done nothing wrong. It was stupid for Chanyeol to have ever expected anything but rejection from Baekhyun. He wasn’t even Baekhyun’s type, anyway. (Because Baekhyun always said little things about what he wanted in a girl and it was always, someone quiet, someone small, someone mean and not awkward with a normal sense of humor to balance out how nice and dorky Chanyeol was. Chanyeol was still his “boyfriend” after all, and Baekhyun wanted his girlfriend to be different from him so he wouldn’t have too much of one or the other.)

Gradually, Chanyeol became able to at least pretend he didn’t feel like crying every time he looked at Byun Baekhyun. His fake smiles became convincing enough that Baekhyun didn’t give him sympathetic ones in return anymore. He was able to persuade himself into being satisfied with the fact that Baekhyun was still being his friend, still letting him sleep in his fort with him. Playing games on his systems (which Jongin had taken them from his parents’ house for him over the summer) and watching TV on Friday nights was a good enough distraction from the fact that Baekhyun was out with someone else.

His birthday passed, and Baekhyun threw a big party for him, inviting his friends from Yangcheon as well as their friends from school (being, Jongdae and Minseok). Christmas went by, too, and Baekhyun’s brother came home and Chanyeol was treated like family, even receiving presents which he had told Baekhyun’s parents they didn’t have to get for him. (He still hadn’t spoken to his own parents, though he’d been in touch with his sister, who promised she supported him and their parents would come around one day.) Baekhyun gave him a present too – a book full of guitar tabs for at least a hundred songs, since Chanyeol had been complaining about wanting to learn more songs. Sometimes (all the time) Baekhyun was way too good for him.

It wasn’t until January that Chanyeol got the feeling things were awkward between him and Baekhyun again. At first he wondered if it was him creating the tension, but no; he’d been working really hard on keeping things normal with Baekhyun, and he hardly even had to think about it anymore. It had been three months, and Chanyeol refused to let himself suffer forever. So it was Baekhyun who was acting strange now.

Their first week back to school, Chanyeol found out why. Friday night rolled around, and Baekhyun got ready as he always did. However, once he’d spent nearly an hour in front of the mirror (and was he wearing eyeliner?), he sat down at the end of his bed, watching as Chanyeol played GTA.

“What are you doing?” Chanyeol wondered, refusing to look at him because he looked particularly good tonight. He was sure Baekhyun never put this much effort into his appearance for dates.

“Just waiting,” Baekhyun replied lightly. “I’m being picked up.”

Well, that was definitely odd. Baekhyun had never been picked up before. Chanyeol tried not to think about why he was now, because Baekhyun was acting strangely about it and he had a really bad feeling it meant he had a girlfriend now, and he just didn’t want to torture himself imagining it.

A few minutes later they were both being called downstairs. “Chanyeol, come eat dinner! And Baek, there’s someone at the door for you!”

It was a bad idea for Chanyeol to let his curiousity get the best of him and sneak a peek at Baekhyun’s date. If he was expecting someone pretty, he certainly wasn’t disappointed. He missed the last stair and had to catch himself on the railing, and heard Baekhyun’s fake laugh chime behind him. In a moment, Baekhyun was pushing him jokingly but firmly towards the kitchen as he made his way to the boy standing in the home’s entrance.

“Goodbye family!” Baekhyun called quickly, grabbing his coat and opening the door. The boy complimented him, telling him he looked great, and Baekhyun gave him a slightly forced smile and mumbled, “Let’s go.” He shot Chanyeol an apologetic glance and then was gone.

Chanyeol didn’t feel like eating dinner at all. He didn’t feel like doing anything, ever again. But he forced himself to down his meal and go back upstairs, mindlessly playing GTA for a couple hours until he decided it was an acceptable time to go to bed. He changed into pajamas and crawled into the fort, burying himself in blankets and leaving some separate for Baekhyun.

He wasn’t sure how long he cried for, but he still was awake when Baekhyun came in, though he pretended not to be. Luckily, he was already facing the wall, and when he felt the bed dip under Baekhyun’s weight he focused on breathing rhythmically. Rather than pressing close to Chanyeol as he usually did, Baekhyun wrapped himself in his own blankets and turned his back on the younger. Chanyeol thought he heard him sniffle a moment later, but he didn’t ask about it.

The rest of the weekend passed in painful silence. Baekhyun wouldn’t even look at him, hardly stayed in the same room for any period of time with him. Immediately following lunch on Saturday, Baekhyun announced he was going to Jongdae’s as he headed out the door, not even giving Chanyeol time to ask if he could join. Not that he would have asked.

By the time Sunday night rolled around, they still hadn’t spoken a word and Chanyeol was pretty sure he was dying a slow death. There were a couple times he actually looked down his shirt to make sure his heart wasn’t bleeding out. How something non-physical could hurt this much, he wasn’t sure. He really couldn’t stand it, though, so while he and Baekhyun were lying motionless and not touching for the third night in a row, he finally spoke up.

“Baekhyun?” He felt the older cringe beside him. “Did you…” The words stuck, and he briefly considered not asking. But if it was between Baekhyun never talking to him again and getting over himself to hear the answer he already knew… His decision was made for him. “Was that guy your date?”

Baekhyun’s voice was very small when he answered, “Yes.”

Chanyeol didn’t have to say anything more, but he did, just to torture himself. “Did you have fun?”

“Don’t,” Baekhyun whispered. “Don’t do that.”

“I thought you were straight.” And he hated the accusation in his voice as much as he hated the pain he couldn’t hide, even with his back turned. “You said you were straight.”

“I was… I thought I was,” Baekhyun mumbled, and for some reason he sounded as hurt as Chanyeol felt. “But after you said you liked me – I thought about it, and I – I just thought maybe I could… I don’t know. Maybe I could date guys, or at least try.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

“Did I have to?” Baekhyun shot, and then immediately clamped his hand over his mouth. “I’m sorry, Chanyeol, I didn’t mean that at all. I just feel so guilty. I told you I didn’t like you because I’m straight, but now maybe I’m not totally straight but I still don’t-” He cut himself off abruptly.

“Don’t like me,” Chanyeol finished. “You don’t have to like me, Baek. It’s not the end of the world.” He wasn’t sure if that was a lie or not; it certainly felt like it.

“I know,” Baekhyun muttered, and at last Chanyeol felt his arms around his waist, forehead pressing between his shoulder blades. “But I still feel like a total jerk. I’m really sorry, ‘Yeol. I didn’t want to hurt your feelings.”

“How weak do you think I am?” Chanyeol teased quietly, although he felt a lot more than hurt. “Really, though, don’t keep secrets like that from me anymore, okay? I can handle it.” Lies. But he could bear it better if Baekhyun told him rather than hid it. And he didn’t want it to come between them.

“I won’t,” Baekhyun promised, and his grip around the younger tightened.

And so, once again, things settled down between the two of them. Baekhyun continued to go on dates with girls or guys (Chanyeol didn’t ask). Chanyeol was able to focus on school, his old friends, and his new friends. He and Minseok ended up getting along well after all, spending some time together working on homework and whatnot. Minseok was a really good guy (though his best friend who Chanyeol met on a couple occasions was always trying to steal all of Minseok’s attention, which Chanyeol thought was cute but also kind of sad, because Minseok hardly seemed to notice most of the time).

However, just a month after Baekhyun’s date with that first guy, Baekhyun confronted Chanyeol. These conversations always seemed to happen in the fort. Maybe it was because they spent a lot of time in the fort, but Chanyeol kind of thought it was more than that. Inside the fort’s ugly walls – which Chanyeol was kind of worried he had gotten used to, and almost grown fond of – it felt like a different world, quiet and separated from everything else. And it might have been because you couldn’t see any clocks from inside, but it felt like time didn’t exist when they were cocooned inside the pitiful flowery barrier.

The first time Chanyeol had seen the fort, Baekhyun had told him he felt safe inside. Chanyeol knew what he meant now.

“You know what I’ve noticed, ‘Yeol?” Baekhyun began one evening. Chanyeol grunted, busy in a round of Anipang. “In all the time I’ve known you, you’ve never gone on a date with anyone, unless you’ve hidden it very well from me.”

Chanyeol’s heart skipped, but he kept his eyes on his phone. “Um, yeah. I guess it’s not my thing.”

“Mhm.” Baekhyun wasn’t buying it. Chanyeol wasn’t all too surprised. “I can’t help feeling like it’s my fault. Which makes me feel really terrible.” Chanyeol tried to protest, but Baekhyun ignored him. “I know you don’t blame me, but I know you still like me – or, I think you do. But I think if you at least tried to put yourself out there, you could find someone you really like who likes you and you could be happy. Don’t you think that?”

His game finally ended with a crappy score, and he looked up at Baekhyun, trying to shrug the older off. “I just haven’t found anyone who really interests me,” he said at an attempt of indifference.

“Are you actually looking, though?” Baekhyun wondered, more than a hint of condemning in his voice. Chanyeol only gave another shrug, and started up a new round of his game. Less than approvingly, Baekhyun got the message and didn’t prod further.

After that, though, Chanyeol decided to at least try to try. It couldn’t hurt to go out on a date; maybe he’d even (finally) get over Baekhyun. After a year and a half of liking the guy, it would be nice to find someone who actually liked him back.

It was a week before Valentine’s Day when they talked about it, though, and Chanyeol sort of wanted to spend the day with Baekhyun before he moved on with his life. Baekhyun, on the other hand, didn’t take him into consideration, and when he was asked to go on a date, he accepted, leaving Chanyeol to be alone on the day of love. Feeling like he couldn’t take another slap in the face, Chanyeol knew that was the end of the line for him. Starting tomorrow, he would look for a date of his own. Starting tomorrow, he would begin to move on.

(For today, though, he would suffer being alone on Valentine’s Day, pining one last time over not getting to be with Baekhyun.)

Valentine’s Day fell on a Sunday that year, and Baekhyun did his best to keep his excited buzzing to a minimum while he waited for evening to come. At six o’clock sharp there was a knock on the door, and Chanyeol tried not to think that it almost certainly meant it was a boy. He stayed up in their room until he was sure Baekhyun was long gone, and then went downstairs to get something to eat, Baekhyun’s parents having gone out too.

Hours ticked by slowly for Chanyeol. A little after nine, Baekhyun’s parents returned home, and his mom came in to ask if Baekhyun had come back yet. Chanyeol told her no. About an hour later, she returned to ask again, saying they were turning in for the night, but Baekhyun still wasn’t there. Usually he would be home by now. It gave Chanyeol a nauseous, sinking feeling in his chest. Neither he nor Baekhyun’s mom said it, but he had a feeling they both were thinking the same thing.

Eleven passed, and then midnight, and Chanyeol wasn’t going to bother waiting up any longer. Baekhyun likely wouldn’t even come home tonight; he didn’t have class until the afternoon anyway. Only twenty minutes past midnight, however, someone did come into the room, and Chanyeol knew just by his breathing it was Baekhyun. The boy was sniffling as the sounds of him undressing filled the silent room, but otherwise he was very quiet as he crept into bed.

Chanyeol knew it would be better to feign sleep, but his tongue defied him and he asked softly, “Was it a girl or a boy tonight?” Baekhyun gave no response, but that was enough of an answer for Chanyeol. He did manage to refrain from asking if it was Baekhyun’s first time; he didn’t want to know either way.

“

No further mentions were made of Baekhyun’s Valentine’s Day. Both Chanyeol and Baekhyun were very unwilling to so much as talk about Valentine’s at all, though on Baekhyun’s behalf Chanyeol didn’t know the reasoning. He could guess, though.

And really, it was about time Chanyeol stopped making Baekhyun feel guilty about being happy.

Therefore, as promised, the day after Valentine’s Chanyeol really did start scoping out a new love interest. To his surprise, it wasn’t hard for him to find someone willing to go out with him. In fact, by the end of the week, he actually had himself a date for Friday night, and it wasn’t Baekhyun, but he was still a little excited. After all, he’d never been on a date before and this was kind of a new experience.

There wasn’t really much to his night. Baekhyun seemed a bit surprised when Chanyeol told him he was going out with a guy he’d met in the library, but he didn’t say anything; he didn’t have a date of his own tonight, and Chanyeol told himself it didn’t matter to him anyway. The guy picked him up and drove him to a very nice restaurant, and Chanyeol found he was actually pretty easy to talk with, if he didn’t think about it as an awkward first date. Even if his date was kind of shy (he sort of seemed like a dork, but he was cute anyway), Chanyeol managed to keep a comfortable flow of conversation between them.  When he was driven home later that night, he thought that even if they didn’t date, he wouldn’t mind being friends with the guy.

His thinking reminded himself of Baekhyun always saying his dates were nice, but he wouldn’t marry them. Suddenly, he knew what he meant.

When Chanyeol arrived back at home, after getting his date’s number, he headed up to his shared room, feeling kind of odd. How was he supposed to find love when he was sleeping with the guy he already loved? He wondered if this was how Baekhyun felt after his dates. For once, though, Baekhyun was the one waiting up for Chanyeol (not that it was very late, slightly after eight thirty), and when Chanyeol came in Baekhyun peeked his head out of the fort and gave him a too-bright smile.

“Hey, ‘Yeol,” he said cheerfully, but his voice cracked.

“You’d think you hadn’t talked in ages,” Chanyeol , and Baekhyun smiled widely again, but Chanyeol thought it didn’t seem very real.

“I haven’t had anyone to talk to for a couple hours,” Baekhyun pointed out.

“Were you lonely?” Chanyeol continued to joke, though he sort of felt bad. Baekhyun did seem like he’d been lonely, or at least very bored without him. And when he just hummed, not even giving a playful response, it made things worse. (But then he remembered that Baekhyun had gone on many dates before and left him alone with all his jealous, self-pitying thoughts; Baekhyun at least didn’t have to suffer those. It made Chanyeol feel only a little better; he still didn’t like seeing Baekhyun unhappy.)

This didn’t stop Chanyeol from going on further dates. Unlike Baekhyun, Chanyeol continued seeing the same guy; even though he didn’t feel anything particularly sparking a romance, he figured he should try a couple times at least, to see if things would change. Baekhyun asked about him sometimes, seeming to take Chanyeol’s consistency with the guy as some sort of permanence.

“He’s sweet,” Chanyeol told him. “Kind of dorky, you know? But really nice and stuff.” Baekhyun seemed unsatisfied, asking for more; his name, age, what he looked like. “Um, his name is Jinki, he’s a third-year. He’s cute, though. I thought he was our age, ‘cause he looks so young and stuff.” Did Chanyeol like him? “Yeah. I wouldn’t keep going out with him if I didn’t like him.” (That and the fact he knew he had to move on, and since Jinki was bearable, Chanyeol was using him as… a rebound, he supposed.)

Meanwhile, Baekhyun himself had stopped going on dates, and so Chanyeol questioned him a bit too. He asked if Baekhyun was in a relationship, but he said no. Chanyeol wondered what that meant, because he hadn’t seen anyone since Valentine’s Day, since he… well. It would be a lie to say Chanyeol wasn’t suspicious and dying to know about Baekhyun’s love-life, but the older had become very secretive about it. Chanyeol guessed it was because it likely seemed like, to Baekhyun, Chanyeol was finally moving on, and he didn’t want to mess things up by telling Chanyeol he was in a stable (or at least ual) relationship until Chanyeol was securely in one of his own. And Chanyeol supposed if that was how it was going to be, he wouldn’t bother intruding on Baekhyun’s relationship with whoever the guy (or girl) was.

It took Chanyeol a little too long to figure out something was wrong.

At first there were little things he brushed off; things like Baekhyun’s previously mentioned fake, too-happy smiles, obvious underlying sadness in his tone when he talked to Chanyeol after the younger had a date, and see-through attempts at excuses suggesting everything was fine in his own life. Baekhyun didn’t sleep so close to him at night, but Chanyeol thought it was because they were both kind of in their own relationship-things now, and it just made sense that they wouldn’t be so touchy.

But then things seemed to only grow worse. Chanyeol couldn’t tell Baekhyun’s fake smiles from his real ones after a while, and he sort of thought that Baekhyun’s smiles just weren’t ever real now – they all seemed so forced. It felt like every time Baekhyun spoke, he had to make an effort to sound happy and not like he was about to fall apart. And there was just this constant sadness in his eyes, whenever he looked at Chanyeol. Honestly, Baekhyun had become downright miserable, and Chanyeol didn’t know why. He blamed Baekhyun’s possible boyfriend, guessing Baekhyun was in a crappy relationship and things weren’t working well, but he didn’t know if that was really it or not.

And then one day, he finally found out why.

It was late March, and Chanyeol had called it a night about an hour earlier after they’d both been studying for what felt like forever. Exam season was coming up and they’d finally started hitting the books pretty hard to figure out all they’d learned the past three months. Baekhyun had gone to bed before Chanyeol without a word, and not long after Chanyeol decided to join him. Yet it had been an hour since he clambered into the fort, and sleep was continuing to evade him. Still, he lay there, missing the days when he would feel Baekhyun close to him, breathing across his neck or shoulders or chest. He was supposed to be forgetting those kinds of things, but it was still hard for him.

He was just arguing with himself the pros and cons of rolling over and pulling Baekhyun into him when his thoughts were disturbed by a quiet sound. His breathing stilled so he could listen, and he heard the sounds of sniffling and shallow breaths hitching, clearly trying to be muted but without success. The bed was shaking slightly, and it took a second but then Chanyeol realized…

Baekhyun was crying?

“Baek?”

Baekhyun gasped quietly, but then he seemed to compose himself and offered his usual, “Hm?” It wavered noticeably.

Chanyeol turned over to look at him, but Baekhyun’s back was to him. This only slightly deterred him. “What’s wrong?”

“N-nothing,” Baekhyun hiccoughed. Chanyeol reached out to rub his back lightly, and Baekhyun winced under his touch.

“Really, Baek, what’s the matter?”

“It’s nothing,” Baekhyun insisted. “I’m just – confused.”

Confused? “Well, talk to me,” Chanyeol told him gently. “Maybe I can help.” Baekhyun shrugged, and stayed very quiet for a while, long enough that Chanyeol thought he’d gone to sleep, but then Baekhyun’s breath caught again and he started shaking. “Come here,” Chanyeol whispered, and Baekhyun didn’t need much convincing. He rolled over and allowed Chanyeol to envelope him in his arms, crying but trying to keep himself quiet.

“I’m just – I don’t know, ‘Yeol… I’m really confused,” Baekhyun whispered breathily. Chanyeol petted his hair in an attempt to sooth him.

“You said that,” Chanyeol noted. “What are you confused about?” Was this about his possible boyfriend? Was he having a uality crisis? (At least Chanyeol knew about that, and could probably be pretty helpful.)

“Ever – ever since Valentine’s Day…” Uh oh. Was this a crisis? Because Chanyeol didn’t have any experience and was limited in knowledge of that area. “I went on a date with this – this guy I’d been into, we’d gone out before. Anyway, he took me home – to his home – and I thought I was ready but… I really wasn’t…” Chanyeol’s stomach plummeted. That didn’t mean… “So I kind of freaked out and said I couldn’t do it, and he got mad but let me go. I had to walk home, but it was okay.” Oh. That definitely was okay, at least far better than the alternative.

“I didn’t even know why I said no,” Baekhyun went on, wiping at his eyes in vain. “It just seemed – wrong. Part of me told me it was because I felt guilty about – about you, but there was something more. And I got home and-” He took a deep breath, sniffling again. “-and you didn’t even say a word. And a couple days later you said – you’d met someone nice, and that should have been good. I’ve felt so bad that you liked me for so long and were just – suffering. But the more I thought about it, the more I thought… maybe I’d missed my chance with you, and I hadn’t even thought I wanted a chance with you…

“And now I still don’t know how I feel,” Baekhyun said, and he sounded equally exasperated and overcome, and Chanyeol probably would have smiled at the poor guy’s frustration if he wasn’t stunned into silence by his words. “But I feel like – I think I might like you, and I think I took way too long to realize it, and I wish I’d liked you when you told me you were gay or that you liked me – and I think maybe I did but it was all kind of sudden and I was scared because I didn’t know how I felt at all and when I said I thought I might like boys I think I really just liked you and-”

Chanyeol put a finger to his lips, effectively cutting him off. “Baekhyun, please take a breath before you pass out,” he told him, pulling his hand away so Baekhyun could breathe.

“I’m sorry, Chanyeol,” Baekhyun whispered. “I’m sorry I’m slow and that I make your life hard and I’m kind of too late now and I can’t just accept things without being scared off. But I kind of think I like you, and I kind of think it’s like a lot and I should’ve listened to Jongdae because he told me a long time ago to either ask you out or stop leading you on, and I didn’t realize it because you were a guy and I’ve never thought about guys that way but I think I’ve kind of liked you all along. I’m sorry. I’m sorry I messed things up and just – I’m sorry about everything.”

He finally shut up, giving Chanyeol a lot – as in far too much – to take in. Chanyeol had had all these feelings for Baekhyun as long as he’d known him, and from day one he’d forced himself to suffer and suppress them because liking Baekhyun wasn’t allowed. There was always a reason why he wasn’t ever allowed to have Baekhyun, why he shouldn’t even bother because he’d never have his feelings returned. And he’d been denying himself for so long that the possibility of Baekhyun ever coming around had been completely stamped out of any reasoning in his mind. Now, though, Baekhyun was saying it was very possible, that – that being in love with him was possible and having that returned was possible, and Chanyeol didn’t know how to comprehend that.

He was still trying to figure it all out a solid minute later – having not spoken a word of consolation or anything – when Baekhyun repeated, “I’m sorry,” and buried his face in Chanyeol’s shirt, beginning to cry again. At that point Chanyeol knew he at least had to tell Baekhyun that he had it all wrong, because Baekhyun was under the impression that Chanyeol wouldn’t give him a chance now and that was never, ever going to be the case.

“It’s alright, Baek,” he assured him. “Let’s just – forget about all that. You’re making it sound like a couple dates with some other guy is enough for me to get over you. And maybe that’s how it should be, but I’ve never stopped liking you for a second, hyung, so it’s okay if you’re only just figuring out everything now.” He probably shouldn’t be so forgiving so fast – it really wasn’t fair for himself – but he couldn’t care less. Compared to his other option – aka, having Baekhyun never like him at all – Chanyeol was happy to have gone through a year and a half of waiting (and suffering and very, very much pain and sadness) if it meant he finally got to be with the boy after all that mess.

Baekhyun glanced up at him, eyes filled with tears and uncertainty. “Really? You – you still-”

“Yeah,” Chanyeol nodded firmly. “I do. I guess I’m sort of a masochist or something, but yeah, I don’t think I’m getting over you any time soon.” Baekhyun’s tears looked ready to start falling again, so Chanyeol offered him the warmest smile he could muster. “How about this – we go on a date and see how we feel about the whole thing. Just one date, no further obligations. And then you can decide what you wanna do and we’ll go from there, okay?”

Chanyeol was extremely proud of himself for managing to remain so calm when he was more or less being handed the moon here, if Baekhyun really meant it about the whole liking-him-back thing. He had a feeling it just hadn’t hit yet, and he didn’t look forward to the time when it did. (Hopefully Baekhyun wouldn’t be around at that time, because he’d probably embarrass himself and scare Baekhyun off again.)

“Okay,” Baekhyun breathed. “That – yeah, that sounds okay.” And he finally seemed to be calmed down a bit, snuggling into Chanyeol and taking steadying breaths. “Thanks, Chanyeol,” he mumbled after a while. “You’re the best, you know… You really are.”

“Nah,” Chanyeol said lightly, even though he felt a bit giddy. “I’m just giving you the chance you were too mean to give me.” Baekhyun gave a broken laugh, and Chanyeol squeezed him to let him know he was only joking and that he really loved him. He hoped the message got across.

At last everything seemed quiet and calm, and Chanyeol thought that was the end of it – at least for the night – and he was trying to get his mind to shut down because he was too excited and he wasn’t entirely sure he wasn’t floating right now but he had class in the morning and he needed to get some sleep. However, before he could even hope to achieve any sleep, Baekhyun spoke up once more, quiet like he was unsure he should say it. Chanyeol heard him anyway.

“’Yeol, can I kiss you one time?”

If his heart didn’t start beating so fast, Chanyeol might have thought he’d literally died. Baekhyun must have realized he’d rendered Chanyeol incapable of speaking, because he went on, “I know I should wait until after our date, but I just wanna see…”

It was suddenly starting to hit him now, that excess of excitement. Somehow, using all of his effort, he managed not to reach down and kiss Baekhyun to death, instead just nodding calmly. He didn’t trust himself to speak – he figured only squeals would come out anyway.

“Just in case, though, if – you know what, never mind,” Baekhyun said, and then Chanyeol felt himself being pulled forward and there were lips on his. They were off-centre a bit, and Baekhyun gave a giggle as he corrected himself, but then Chanyeol was making a very tiny, weak sound as their mouths pressed together. Baekhyun pulled away too soon – any time before eternity was too soon – and gave a soft sigh, sounding relieved. “Yeah, I don’t regret it. I kind of wouldn’t mind doing it again, so that’s a good sign, right?”

Chanyeol’s head was spinning, but he thought he made a noise of some sort of agreement. Baekhyun’s fingers moved to push the hair off his forehead and continued back, threading in the hairs at the nape of Chanyeol’s neck. He offered a tiny smile in the dark.

“I’ll wait until after our date for the next one,” he said as though he was trying to assure Chanyeol. (Meanwhile, Chanyeol wouldn’t mind if they did nothing but kiss until their date.) “When will that be, anyway?” he added.

Chanyeol was sure tomorrow wouldn’t be too soon.

“

It ended up being a whole three days until their date. Chanyeol decided he would wait until Friday, so things would be proper and real and whatnot. He planned everything out – it took him a while to get the perfect idea for their first date, but soon enough an idea came to him and he knew Baekhyun would kill him but he hoped he would like it too.

About ten minutes to six, he slipped outside, reminding Baekhyun’s mom to make sure Baekhyun answered the door. A few minutes later, he knocked, and the woman cued, “Baek, get the door, my hands are full!” Chanyeol was expecting Baekhyun to see right through it, but then Baekhyun was calling back about how he had a date with Chanyeol in a few minutes and he really didn’t have time for this. There was more grumbling on the other side of the door as it opened, and then Baekhyun was revealed, looking up at Chanyeol in surprise and then confusion.

“I’m here to pick up Byun Baekhyun,” Chanyeol announced, and Baekhyun’s face broke into a grin.

“Oh gosh, you’re so-” He just shook his head, laughing. “Was my mom in on this?” Chanyeol nodded. “Ugh. You’re terrible, mom!” he called over his shoulder, and his mother’s laugh chimed. “Okay, let’s go. Are you sure I’m okay dressed like this?”

Chanyeol glanced over him, nodding again. He’d told Baekhyun to dress really comfortably – as in, pajama comfy – because otherwise he would suffer the whole evening. This was going to be a very casual event, after all, no need for formal attire. Baekhyun had reluctantly dressed in a loose-fitting shirt and track pants after much reassurance from Chanyeol that it was a perfect outfit and that Baekhyun didn’t ever have to dress up for him. (He was still wearing eyeliner, though, and Chanyeol appreciated it a lot because it was for him, but it still made his life difficult because it was not fair for someone to look so y. Especially not in track pants. Ugh.)

“Fine, then,” Baekhyun sighed, slipping his hand into Chanyeol’s. “Let’s go. Where are you taking me?”

“You’ll see,” Chanyeol said, glancing at his phone to check the time. 5:59. Any second now. “Eventually.”

“What does that mean?”

Before Chanyeol could answer, a car pulled up in front of their house – Baekhyun’s family car, his father in the driver’s seat. Baekhyun frowned, giving Chanyeol another confused look, but Chanyeol just smiled, leading him over to the car and holding the door for him. When they were both in the back, seatbelts on and set to go, Chanyeol nodded to Baekhyun’s father in the mirror and the car began moving.

“You have to close your eyes, Baekhyun,” Chanyeol ordered. “You’re not allowed to see where we’re going.”

“Huh? Why not?” Baekhyun pouted.

“It’s a surprise,” Chanyeol replied. “Now close your eyes.” The older did, and Chanyeol covered his eyes with his hands, just in case Baekhyun decided to peek. He couldn’t have that.

The drive was about fifteen minutes, the latter half of which Baekhyun complained about how he was dying of curiousity and begged Chanyeol to at least give him a hint (which Chanyeol refused to do). He resorted to asking his dad to give him something to go off of, but his father didn’t break either.

Finally they arrived at their destination, and Baekhyun asked if he could look now, and Chanyeol told him no, he couldn’t, and he would let Baekhyun know when he could open his eyes. Baekhyun huffed but allowed himself to be led out of the car, eyes still covered as Chanyeol walked close behind him and Baekhyun’s dad told them to have fun before driving off. They moved slowly – Baekhyun afraid of walking into something or someone – but eventually they reached the building they were going to, and Chanyeol opened the door, telling Baekhyun to remove his shoes. They both did, and Baekhyun still wasn’t permitted to see where they were. Chanyeol said hello to a couple people Baekhyun couldn’t see, and then they continued on.

“We’re going to the next floor,” Chanyeol warned him. “So there’s some stairs ahead.” Baekhyun seemed increasingly nervous at the prospect, but once he was on the stairs he got the pattern quickly, and before he knew it, they were at the top, and still they walked.

“Chanyeol, I’m seriously freaking out here,” Baekhyun whined. “I mean it – I don’t know where I am and I’m getting worried. Can I please open my eyes?”

“Into this room,” Chanyeol said, turning Baekhyun’s body in the right direction. “Now stop.”

“Hammer time,” Baekhyun said. Chanyeol sighed loudly, scowling so hard he thought his face might get stuck. Baekhyun grinned, but then grew serious again. “Really, though, are we here now?”

“Yes,” Chanyeol answered, pulling his hands away and letting them fall to Baekhyun’s shoulders. “You can open your eyes.”

Baekhyun’s eyes fluttered open, looking very expectant, but his expression froze as he took in the scene before him. Chanyeol would have laughed, but he was worrying about what Baekhyun was thinking and instead just bit his lip.

“Uh, ‘Yeol,” Baekhyun said finally. “What are we doing in my room?”

If, somehow, Baekhyun wasn’t totally familiar with his own room, the hideous fort would have been enough of a giveaway from the second he opened his eyes. He looked back at Chanyeol questioningly, and Chanyeol could tell he hadn’t figured it out – that the whole going out and driving around aimlessly just to come back to their house was all a big cover-up for Chanyeol’s genius plan – and that made him pretty happy.

“We’re going on a date,” Chanyeol answered casually, as if that had been obvious all along. “In our room. In our fort.”

Baekhyun raised an eyebrow. “In the fort you hate? The one you complain about on a regular basis? The one that’s small and stuffy and terribly put-together and has the ugliest sheet ever according to you?”

“Well, unless you have a nicer fort hidden somewhere in the house,” Chanyeol noted. “Then yeah, that fort. So hop in. Actually, don’t hop. I don’t want you to make a mess. But get in.”

Both Baekhyun’s eyebrows were raised now, but he seemed to realize he wasn’t getting any further explanation from Chanyeol, so he cautiously went around to the end of the bed to get in. Once he looked in, he snorted.

“Chips, huh?”

“Not just any chips,” Chanyeol pointed out.

“Lots and lots of – what, ketchup chips?” Baekhyun grabbed one from the large bowl waiting for them at the entrance of the fort, popping it in his mouth. “Oh, barbeque. Aren’t those your favourite?”

Chanyeol grinned. “Darn right they are.” Baekhyun lifted the bowl so he could scoot in past them, but paused again.

“Pop, too,” he uttered, pulling out a bottle – it was root beer, and the contents were half-gone. “Did you start it without me?”

“I drank a bunch of it with Minseok-hyung yesterday,” Chanyeol admitted. “He said he was probably never touching root beer again. At least not for a while.”

Frown lines creased Baekhyun’s forehead. “Was there a reason we couldn’t just have the whole bottle?” he wondered. Chanyeol sighed. He could be so slow sometimes.

“Don’t you remember?” he prodded, but Baekhyun’s frown only deepened. “The first night I ever stayed here with you, in your weird fort, when I was miserable as hell. You brought us barbeque chips – and you didn’t even know they were my favourite – and half a bottle of root beer, and we watched-”

“Mulan,” Baekhyun finished, putting the pop and bowl down and crossing the room to throw his arms around Chanyeol’s waist. “You are so cute, you know that?” he murmured into Chanyeol’s shirt.

“I just thought it would be special,” Chanyeol replied softly. “I mean, I know we spend a lot of time in the fort, but it’s something that’s just – ours. It’s our hideout from the world; our sanctuary. And it’s not a nice restaurant and I didn’t even spend like anything on it, but-”

He was cut off as a finger pressed to his lips, Baekhyun’s eyes meeting his and looking very, very loving (and maybe a little teary). “I think it’s perfect, ‘Yeol. It’s better than all the money in the world.”

“That’s cheesy,” Chanyeol said quietly, though he thought his own eyes might be watering a bit at the older’s words.

“Don’t you talk to me about cheesy,” Baekhyun returned, giving an entertained grin. Before Chanyeol could respond or tell him to get in the fort so they could start their movie, hands were on the front of his shirt tugging him down so Baekhyun’s mouth could reach his lips. Taken very much by surprise, Chanyeol gave a gasp but managed not to pull away. Baekhyun’s lips stayed against his for a long time, and by the time he leaned back Chanyeol had one hand twisted into his hair, the other holding his neck. He didn’t let go of him when they broke apart; neither did Baekhyun, still holding his shirt.

“Sorry,” Baekhyun breathed. “I said I would wait until after our date. I guess I’m impatient.”

Chanyeol took a moment to begin processing words again. “Don’t ever apologize for kissing me,” he was able to say after a while, and Baekhyun hugged him tightly.

“Alright,” he replied. “Let’s go watch our movie now, okay?”

And when they were lying in bed, after the movie was over and Baekhyun made true on his word and kissed Chanyeol once more (or maybe a few times, but neither was counting), Chanyeol told Baekhyun that he kind of loved him a lot, and asked if he had fun on their date. They both knew what he really meant – because the date was supposed to be for Baekhyun to decide what their relationship would be. For once, though, Baekhyun didn’t give quite his usual response.

“It was a lot of fun, Park Chanyeol,” he said, fingers twined together as they kept safe in their sanctuary. “I don’t think I could ever forget this one. My date was really nice; handsome, funny, and he even let me eat the last of the chips.” Chanyeol snorted. (He still couldn’t believe they actually finished the whole bowl; it had been like, three bags.)

“And you know what? I think I could marry him.”

[A/n: For other readers, taking a second to promote some of my other short stories/series: 
Shadow Boy (Kyungsoo drabble series), Offender (Baekyeol two-shot), Something Wrong (Baekyeol hs one-shot), Meretrix de Menses XI (Kaisoo two- or three-shot), Category 9 (Xiuhan, side Kaisoo&Baekyeol chaptered fic), Best of Both Worlds (Kaisoo Hannah Montana!au one-shot).]