It was never an exaggeration to say I wasn’t a very well known person. I fit more like a side character in people’s lives, watching as things flew by me. Sometimes it felt like I was teetering on an edge, about to fall into some nameless, faceless oblivion. Not many people knew me well, and the ones that did I’m sure would have been just fine with one less friend.

Don’t get me wrong though, I’m not going to complain about my life to you. I just mean…it was kind of lonely sometimes.    

Is it sad to say I miss that life? Laugh if you want but it’s true. A normal, simple life is something I would be glad to take. I’ve had it in my hands, but I wasn’t sure it was right for me.

It was perfect for me, I was just being stupid.

If I told you what I traded for that life I bet you wouldn’t believe me. No, you seriously wouldn’t, so don’t bother being skeptical. Just... try and picture this: a person. Someone that’s powerful and intimidating; with one glance they can make you crumble down into nothing. When you try to run they’re always standing in front of you, when you’re at your most vulnerable you can’t hide because they’re watching you, and when you think you’ve reached your limit they’re there to pull you back into the fray. The entire time, you don’t know whether they mean to help or set you up for more failures.

But then that doesn’t even matter. The more time you spend with them the more you realize they’re different; they are on an entire different level then anyone you’ve met in your life. They’ll never tell you the entire truth, and the longer you stay close to them the more you’ll realize that what you’re getting yourself into isn’t good. You aren’t safe. The smart thing to do would be to run away.

But since when does a girl make smart decisions when a handsome face is involved?

I have multiple people in my life right now like that. Trust me, this isn’t any fantasy that you’d go to bed hoping to have in your dreams. This is the nightmare that waits for you, drags you down and will never let you wake up until it’s reached its dramatic finale.

Would you still being willing to close your eyes?   

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