Chapter 24

The sun was shining brightly into my room, making me grunt in disappointment. It was another day of school and yet, I didn’t want to get out of bed. I stretched out onto my bed as I yawned, letting my body slowly start waking up. My eyes darted beside me, but there was no Chen. I quickly sat up and looked down at the bed that was on the ground and saw that he wasn’t there either. I quickly threw my blankets off of me and ran down the stairs and just as I hit the last step, I fell into someone’s arms and we fell back onto the ground.

“Yah…” I heard the person cough from me hitting the a little too hard. “Slow down.”

I pulled myself away and smiled immediately seeing that it was Chen. “Good morning.”

“Good morning to you too.” He chuckled as he stared at me with his handsome smile. “What are you doing rushing down here so quickly like that?”

“I was scared that you were gone.” I said as I felt my face burn. “I didn’t want to –.”

Chen leaned in and kissed my cheek. “Go wash up. I made breakfast for us.”

“Wait.” I held onto his forearm. “What about your uniform for school?”

“I have it with me.” He stood up and helped me stand up. “Now go and wash up or else it’ll be too late for you to eat breakfast.

“Okay.” I said with a smile.

Chen and I walked to school hand-in-hand; I still wasn’t used to it and it made everyone stare at us, but it didn’t really bother me. Holding onto Chen’s hands at school made me feel happy and that’s all that really mattered to me. When we got inside the school, Chen walked me to my class and bid his goodbye. I didn’t want to say bye to him at all. I wanted to see him, be next to him, hold his hands, see his smile, everything, but I couldn’t. He promised me he’d see me at lunch and I was anticipating it like a mad woman.

During the lectures before lunch, my chest kept squeezing. I wasn’t sure if it’s because it was starting to get hotter out since summer was arriving and the air was getting muggy, but it hurt. I took a deep breath and every time I did, a sharp pain would be there. I have been active so I didn’t understand why my heart would feel this way. I dug in my bag and grabbed my medicine and took one of the tablets and tried to relax my mind by trying to pay attention in class, but it wasn’t working since it seemed like the pain was taking over my focus.

“Ga Eul, are you alright?” My teacher asked me seeing that I was holding onto my chest.

“I’m fine.” I replied as I pretended as if the pain wasn’t there suddenly.

My teacher went back to lecturing after contemplating whether or not I was telling the truth. It was getting a little harder for me to breathe as time was going by, but it really didn’t make sense. I took my medicine just an hour ago and yet, I felt like all of this pain and hard breathing was still here, which it shouldn’t be. My medication was to help the pain stop and to make breathing easier for me and yet, it seemed to be doing the opposite. I decided to close my eyes for a bit, but this only made me feel like I was going to fall asleep.

What was going on with me?

“C-can I go to the nurse’s office?” I spoke out rudely, only because I was starting to panic.

“Of course, Ga Eul.” My teacher looked worried. “Are you alright?”

“I-I’m fine.” I said as I grabbed my bag and walked out of the classroom; it felt so stuffy in there.

I looked at the time on my phone and saw that I had ten minutes until it was lunch time; that meant that there was ten minutes left before I get to see Chen. I was getting excited, but this pain wasn’t going to help if I didn’t go check on it. I quickly made my way towards the nurse’s office so I could find out what was happening, but I stopped in my tracks as soon as I heard a couple yelling at each other from the back yard. I opened the door slightly and poked my head out to see that it was Ji Min and Jae Kyung.

“What do you mean you’re moving?” Ji Min asked.

“I’m moving to Japan, Ji Min.” Jae Kyung already had a few tears streaming down her rosy cheeks. I could tell that it must have been hard for her to tell Ji Min about her moving. “I wanted to tell you, but I was scared.”

“Scared about what?” He didn’t seem to understand her situation at all. “So what if you’re moving? That doesn’t mean anything.”

“Ji Min, if I’m moving…” She choked up.

“Hey, Jae Kyung.” Ji Min walked towards her, but she took a step back and it really seemed to have taken him by surprise since this is the first time that it’s happened. “W-what’s wrong? Why are you keeping a distance from me?”

“Ji Min, we can’t be together if I’m in Japan.” She stated. “You’re going to become an idol and you trying to focus on both of us won’t do well.”

“You can’t just think that.” He retorted as his eyes softened at her.

“You’ve always been dreaming about being an idol and you’ve finally got to train! I don’t want to be the one to stop you.”

“Why would you even think about stopping me, Jae Kyung?” I saw him clench his fists together. “You’re supposed to be my biggest supporter…”

I felt my heart break into little pieces hearing Ji Min say those last few words. I was wondering what was hurting more now – the physical pain inside of my chest or the way he said his words to the one he had loved for so long.

“But if you want to focus on me, I want you to only focus on me.”

He looked at her confused.

“And that can’t happen if you’re going to become an idol.” She started to shake her head slowly from side to side. “Your main focus should be becoming an amazing idol that everyone loves and praises… And if you focus on me, your focus won’t be there.”

“So you’re breaking up with me?” I heard Ji Min sniffle and I knew he was crying now. “You want to break up because of your own selfish needs?”

“Do you think you can still date while you’re an idol, Park Ji Min? Do you?” She asked looking at him sternly. “You think that your fans won’t be upset or that they would support you?”

“I wouldn’t care for their support, Han Jae Kyung! Your support is something I want more than anyone else’s!” Ji Min raised his voice, making me cringe.”You’re the most important person to me and you’re taking this so lightly!”

“But I’m not.” She whispered.

 “Then if you were to stay here, you wouldn’t even think about this, huh?!”

“That’s not true, Ji Min. I would have done the same thing.”

“Jae Kyung…” For the first time, Ji Min has never sounded so weak.

“We can’t do anything we always do, Ji Min. We can’t hold hands, we can’t kiss, we can’t hug, we can’t even see each other because you’re going to get busy due to your schedules, and if you’re ever seen with me, you’d get hurt from the rumors.” She cried even harder and it made me feel like I was about to cry as well. “There just can’t be us in this…”

“Then I don’t want to be an idol.” He was crying even more now. “If I can’t be with you, I don’t want to be an idol.”

“You’ve dreamt about this for so long that you’re willing to throw it away just for a girl?” Jae Kyung asked.

I was confused. I didn’t understand if she was really doing this for him, herself, or she was doing this for the both of them. I remember her saying that she was going to make it work, so why was she doing this now? Did she have something she was hiding? Or what was really on her mind? Maybe… Maybe Jae Kyung was saying everything she wanted to say? It is true; it’s not going to be the same for the two of them when he becomes an idol.

“I can always dream later.” Ji Min said.

“I won’t let you do that.”

“Then stay with me.”

“I’m sorry…” Jae Kyung said before she turned away from him and started to walk away.

Seeing all of this was so heart-breaking, it made me forget what I was supposed to be doing. Ji Min dropped down to his knees and cried his heart out while Jae Kyung did the same, except she was the one walking away from him and the situation between the two of them. I never knew a breakup could be this sad or could be this hurtful; it wasn’t even my relationship to start off with and yet, I was still hurt by it.

I wanted to follow Jae Kyung and comfort her, but there was Ji Min, who was crying alone. I didn’t know who to comfort, so I stood where I was and felt a few tears stroll down my cheeks. These two were my best friends and they just broke up, leaving me to wonder what I was going to do to balance everything out. I wish I could force the two of them back together, but relationships never worked out that way. It hurt my heart seeing that some of the most important people to me were hurt and I couldn’t do anything for them.

“Are you sure you’re feeling better now?” The nurse was asking about the pain in my chest since I finally got to the office after what seemed years.

I nodded my head as I looked at the clock. I’m sure Chen was waiting for me in the lunch room. “I’m fine now. I think after taking a walk and getting some fresh air, my pain went away.”

“You must have felt stuffy in there.” She said. “Go eat; it should help you loosen up and give you more energy.”

I thanked her with a bow and ran to the lunchroom excitedly. When I got there, I immediately looked for Chen, but he was nowhere to be found.

“G-Ga Eul?”

I turned around to who called my name. “Ji Min?”

“C-can I talk to you… Somewhere private?”

I nodded my head as I followed after him. His eyes were red, but they weren’t puffy so it didn’t make it look like he had been crying; it did look like he was exhausted though. He must have been lacking in sleep since he’s been training so much. We walked outside to the front of the school and sat at the steps together in silence. I knew he was going to talk about the whole breakup with me; I hated that I wasn’t even prepared.

“Did you know about it?”

“Know about what?” I asked looking at him.

“Did you know that Jae Kyung was moving?” He looked over at me with a serious expression; it kind of made me feel uncomfortable for the first time.

I nodded my head. “I just recently found out.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Wouldn’t it be better if it came from her?”

“She broke up with me, Ga Eul. Did you know that too?”

I didn’t say anything only because I didn’t know what to say.

“You knew?”

“I heard…” I whispered more to myself than him. “She never told me that she was going to break up with you.”

Ji Min scoffed. I could tell he was trying really hard not to burst out into tears. I felt bad for him and I hated that I felt bad for him; I wouldn’t like it if someone was feeling bad towards me.

“I’m sorry, Ji Min.”

“Who would have thought this would happen?” He laughed as if this was funny to him and yet, he was still kind of sad. “Do people just think it’s that easy to leave someone? Do they just think that they can just leave after they’ve had their fair share of happiness?”

I felt the pain inside of my chest start hurting again. I took a deep breath while he talked, but this only made me wince in pain.

“How could she say that I had to only focus on her? She knew about my dreams and how badly I wanted it…” He shook his head. “How could she make me choose? How could she be that selfish to only want her own happiness while I can’t have mine? And she wanted to break up because I wanted both?” He pulled at his hair. “Girls are so cruel. How could they make you fall in love with them and then they leave you as if we were nothing?”

And just those few last sentences got me. I related to them so much that the pain inside of my chest had increased and I could barely breathe. Ji Min was right. I was selfish. I wanted to be wit Chen so much, even if we didn’t do much together, that I kept him around and kept the fact that I had a heart problem to myself. It only took me so long to tell Seung Ho and here I was at it again; when was I going to tell Chen? I started crying – crying wasn’t helping with my breathing; it was starting to feel suffocating – but I couldn’t tell if it was because of the pain inside of my chest or because the reality of my relationship with Chen.

 “I’m sorry, Ji Min.” And just as I finished my sentence, everything around me turned black.

*A/N: I've never seen so many comments for this story until last night's update! Thank you all for the cute comments :DD I really appreciate it that you all took the time to say something whether it was a few words or multiple sentences, but good night to you all! Good morning/afternoon as well to those on the other side of the world who are reading this :) I'm tired and I need to sleep. It is midnight. Please read and comment. I'd love to hear about your opinions, so please don't be a silent reader. Thank you and read with lots of love! Keke~! Muah