title: remember us (and that fateful christmas day)

pairing: chanbaek/baekyeol, ninja!kaisoo

genre: fluff, romance

rating: PG

word count: ~10k

note: it's a little late, considering the time that this will be posted, but, yeah, happy holidays to my fellow chanbaek shippers! i hope you had a good one, and try to keep safe from all the fireworks/firecrackers/whatever. :D this is supposed to be set in South Korea, but i have no idea how their schools are, so i just based it on how schools are in my place. okay, enjoy! ♥

oh! and later on in the story, there's something that chanyeol will play. do listen to this when you're at that part already. you'll know it when you see it. :) song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WGA_jjuxSwA

 

 

 

 

*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*'*

 

 

 

 

remember us (and that fateful christmas day)

 

 

 

 

December 24, 1998, Christmas Eve.

 

"Hurry up! I want to go sing now!"

A six year old Chanyeol groaned in unmasked frustration as he fixed his corrective glasses before running after his neighbour, a 'cute little bouncy boy' (according to his mother) by the name of Baekhyun. Baekhyun impatiently stomped his foot as he waited for Chanyeol. When Chanyeol was near enough, Baekhyun quickly grabbed his hand, linked their fingers together and pulled him along the brightly lit streets in their subdivision, soft Christmas music floating through the air. Chanyeol grimaced at the touch, and tried to pry off his hand.

"Ew! Baekhyun, stop touching me! You're going to give me the cooties!"

"Excuse you, but I don't have cooties. And we're boys! Only the girls at school are bothered by cooties." Baekhyun snorted, and Chanyeol slapped him on the shoulder with his other hand.

"Whatever. Mommmm, Baekhyun's giving me the cooties!"

From behind them, two middle-aged women walked after them, one of them holding a video camera and the other carrying a bag of refreshments. The one with the video camera giggled before waving her hand dismissively.

"Honey, Baekkie doesn't have cooties. Cooties aren't true, okay? Now go on! The next house is up the road."

Chanyeol grumbled in annoyance but followed Baekhyun to the next house. They rang the doorbell and as they waited for the gate to open, Baekhyun nudged Chanyeol with his elbow. Chanyeol turned to him, and Baekhyun smiled.

"Are you ready? It's Jingle Bells, this time, okay?"

Chanyeol nodded, and as the gate opened, they both started singing, jingling their tambourines along. It was a yearly thing  they did, the Christmas carolling. It started as far as Chanyeol could remember, ever since Baekhyun and his family moved into the house next to theirs. As soon as they were done, the family living in the house gave them candies and change and bid them happy Christmases.

The gates closed, and they soon went on their merry way. Baekhyun was happily looking into his pouch, exclaiming how rich he was already when Chanyeol spotted something moving in the bushes nearby. He quickly scurried over, and to the surprise of their parents and Baekhyun, he pulled out a dirty looking ferret. Baekhyun was the first one to squeal.

"A rabbit! That's so cute! Chanyeol, can I touch it? Can I, can I, can I, can I, can I?" Baekhyun was literally bouncing on his feet, and his mother had to hold him down by the shoulders.

Chanyeol's mother stepped forward, a worried look on her face. "Honey, put the ferret down. It might bite you and make you sick."

"No, it won't, mom. I think it's sick and scared. Can we take care of it?" Chanyeol asked, eyes widening as he jutted out his lower lip. His mother frowned but soon gave in.

"Alright, but we'll take that to the vet tomorrow. Let's cut the carolling for now, and go home, okay?"

Mrs. Byun and Mrs. Park led the way back, talking to each other while keeping an eye and the camera on the kids. Baekhyun and Chanyeol walked behind them, the latter gently cuddling the scared ferret close to his chest. Baekhyun literally had his chin resting on top of Chanyeol's shoulder, trying to take a peek at the little furry creature. Chanyeol kept on nudging him away, and Baekhyun finally pulled away, a pout on his face.

"Chanyeol, let me see! I want to see it, too!"

"No! It's scared of your ugly face. Go away, Baekhyun."

"I'm not ugly! I just want to see the rabbit!" Baekhyun huffed indignantly, and Chanyeol stuck a tongue out at him.

"It's a ferret, Baekhyun."

"I want to see the ferret, then! Let me see! Mom, Chanyeol's being mean!"

Chanyeol's mom sighed in exasperation before turning to his son. She kept the camera trained on their faces, Chanyeol busy staring at the ferret and Baekhyun busy glaring daggers at the back of Chanyeol's head.

"Chanyeol, honey, let Baekhyun see. He's not going to hurt it."

"He might."

"I won't." Baekhyun interjected, voice tinged with hopefulness as he inched closer, upper teeth clamping down on his lower lip as he craned his neck up to peek at the furry source of their problem.

"...fine. But this is the only time you'll see him." Chanyeol mumbled, and he winced when Baekhyun screeched at him, nearly popping his eardrums.

"But whyyy?!? Mom, Mrs. Park, he's being mean to me!" Baekhyun was on the verge of tears, clenched fists slowly going to cover his eyes as his face scrunched up, sobbing and growing redder each second.

Mrs. Park quickly moved closer and smacked the head of his son lightly. Chanyeol scowled at her, before pouting and looking at his sobbing neighbour. He felt a little guilty watching those little drops of salty tears roll down the little boy's cheeks. Looking away, he finally relented.

"Fine. You can see him tomorrow, too. Just don't hurt him."

Baekhyun stopped sobbing before frowning at Chanyeol, a mischievous glint in his eyes. He walked up to his own mother, taking her hand and tugging on it urgently. The middle-aged woman leaned over to listen to her son.

"I'll just marry Chanyeol so I'll be with him every day. That's okay, right, mom?"

Chanyeol's eyes nearly popped out of the sockets, the blood rushing to his cheeks as the image of a six-year old him wearing a too large black tuxedo and a six-year-old Baekhyun wearing a flimsy white dress with a veil on his head invaded his mind. Mrs. Park laughed, her hand shaking as she tried to keep the camera on the kids. Mrs. Byun smiled, and Chanyeol thought that she might rip her cheeks in two at the rate that she was going.

"Yeah, sure, but...are you sure you want to marry Chanyeol, baby?" Mrs. Byun asked, patting her son's head.

"Yes, Mom, I'm going to marry Chanyeol!"Baekhyun answered excitedly, grinning smugly at Chanyeol.

Chanyeol frowned, stomping his foot as he hugged his ferret to his chest protectively. He blew raspberries at Baekhyun before turning away, chin held high.

"Nooo!! You're not! I don't want to marry you!"

"But I want to!"  Baekhyun suddenly latched on to his arm, and Chanyeol felt his mind go blank as he could somehow feel imaginary cooties crawling up his skin.

Baekhyun squeezed his arm, grinning at the ferret. He turned to his mother, his smile never leaving his face.

"Mom, mom, I can marry Chanyeol, right?!"

Mrs. Byun could only laugh in response, wiping the tears threatening to fall from her eyes from pure mirth. "Sure, honey. Ask him again when you're grownups."

"Yay!  I'll get to see Chanyeol's ferret every day!"

It was from that day on that Chanyeol and Baekhyun found themselves stuck in a friendship that started out forced, but became natural and permanent over the years, each person yearning for the warmth and comfortable easiness that the other gave.

 

 

 

 

 

 

June 14, 2005, start of high school.

 

"Baek, this is Kyungsoo. He's a transferee, and I sort of felt bad seeing him eat lunch alone. So I dragged him along. Is that okay with you?"

Baekhyun remained quiet, a piece of rice cake stuck in between his lips as his gaze travelled from Kyungsoo's short black hair that made him look an elementary school boy to his narrow shoulders that made the corner of Baekhyun's lips twitch into a smile down to his short legs (that Baekhyun would bet is shorter than his). Kyungsoo fidgeted under his scrutinizing gaze until Baekhyun finally the piece of rice cake into his mouth (eliciting a disgusting slurping sound making Chanyeol scowl at him), chewed a little before grinning at Kyungsoo warmly.

"Welcome to the club! Well, it's really just me, Jongdae and my future husband, Chanyeol, but feel free to join!"

Kyungsoo nearly choked on his own spit at the unusual introduction. Beside him, he could see Chanyeol running his hand through his hair in exasperation before taking the seat beside Baekhyun. The latter automatically snuggled closer, ignoring how Chanyeol clicked his tongue in annoyance. Baekhyun just happily continued munching on his rice cakes. Kyungsoo cleared his throat before taking the seat next to the guy quietly reading a book (probably Jongdae).

"Hi. So, uhm...future husband?" Kyungsoo felt himself smile awkwardly at how Baekhyun visibly brightened.

Baekhyun responded by wrapping his arms around Chanyeol's waist, nuzzling the taller male's chest with his cheek. Chanyeol didn't do anything, seemingly used to the smaller male. Kyungsoo cringed at the display of affection.

"Yeah! I'm Chanyeol's best friend, neighbour, soul mate and future wife, Baekhyun! Nice to meet you!"

From that day on, Kyungsoo could see that despite Chanyeol's attempts at literally prying Baekhyun off him, the taller genuinely cared for Baekhyun. He always kept an eye out for the smaller male, seeing as how Baekhyun always tended to get lost in malls and on campus. No matter how clingy and annoying Baekhyun would get, Chanyeol would still give that top-notch murderous glare and 'back the off' speech to anyone who dared hurt his future wife (as proclaimed on a daily basis by Baekhyun himself). It was a friendship that Kyungsoo wished he had, and enjoyed watching from the sidelines.

 

 

 

 

 

 

December 12, 2007, annual school Christmas party.

 

During their third year in high school, they had gone past the stage of ignoring the term 'love life'. Chanyeol was the first of the four to set his eyes on someone from the opposite . He didn't really tell anybody, but Kyungsoo and Jongdae were sharp. They noticed how Chanyeol grew quieter than how he usually was when a certain girl was around them. Baekhyun was the only oblivious one, still preferring on latching on to his 'future husband' despite the taller male's pleads.

"Baekhyun, stop clinging onto me. Seriously."

"Why not? I want to be close to my husband!" Baekhyun pressed his cheek against Chanyeol's shoulder, puffing up his cheeks, jutting out his lower lip and frowning up at his best friend.

"I'm not your future husband!" Chanyeol hissed back, and Baekhyun remained unfazed. If anything, he only tightened his hold on Chanyeol's arm, a smug grin on his face.

"Yeah, you are. I told you I was going to marry you."

"We were kids, Baek. Six year old little boys." Chanyeol rolled his eyes as he gently tried to pry off Baekhyun's fingers from his arm.

"Whatever. Kids don't lie. I want to marry you, so live with it."

"Baekhyun." Chanyeol tried to sound firm, but Baekhyun only responded by lifting up his legs onto Chanyeol's lap. Kyungsoo and Jongdae snorted from their position beside the bickering pair.

"Chanyeol." Baekhyun stuck his tongue out, flipping his fringe to the side.

Chanyeol rolled his eyes for the nth time that day before looking away and opting to give up, until he spotted the girl that he was crushing on ever since the start of their junior year. She was his club mate at the light music club, and she was really nice and smart and also an assistant at the school infirmary and really, the last thing that Chanyeol wanted her to think was that he was gay for Baekhyun, the resident class clown.

Turning back to Baekhyun, for the first time ever in their supposed forced best friendship, Chanyeol forcefully pushed him away. Baekhyun, not expecting the sudden act of violence, lost his balance and fell off from the bench that they were sitting on. Kyungsoo and Jongdae were quickly at his side, faces alarmed as they, too, were shocked.

"Baek, stop being delusional! We're both guys, we can't do that!" Chanyeol raised his voice, suddenly getting nervous, guilty and confused after seeing the look on Baekhyun's face, and also from their growing audience (because Baekhyun's pained yelp wasn't exactly quiet and seeing Baekhyun and Chanyeol in an almost-fight was a rare thing).

"Chanyeol, what the hell?! You didn't have to push him!" Jongdae narrowed his eyes at Chanyeol, and Kyungsoo patted Baekhyun's head, the latter seemingly on the verge of tears.

"W-well...well, I've had enough of his bull, okay?! Leave me alone!" Chanyeol snapped back in a last attempt to defend his actions. He could feel his palms getting sweaty.

"Jesus, man, it was all in good fun! You didn't have to hurt Baekhyun! Look, his palms are bleeding, you stupid idiot!" True to Jongdae's words, Baekhyun's once smooth and soft palms were now a bright red, looking raw with some spots bleeding. He had tried to stop his fall, resulting in him scratching his palms. Chanyeol felt guilt tugging at his insides.

He stepped forward, a hand held out as he tried to apologize to Baekhyun, but his best friend flinched away, preferring to curl up in Kyungsoo and Jongdae's arms. Chanyeol felt hurt. "B-Baek, I'm sorry. I didn't--

"It's okay. I-I...I understand." Baekhyun's voice broke through the soft murmurs of the crowd. Chanyeol, too filled up with guilt and shame, had to strain his ears to hear the smaller boy's words.

"You...understand?"

"Clearly, I haven't been giving you space all these years. I just..I just assumed that what I was doing was okay with you since you didn't really say anything, but...I'm sorry. I'll stop now." Despite the frown marring his face, he tried to give Chanyeol a small smile. "I'll leave you alone from now on, Chanyeol."

The words struck Chanyeol like a hammer swung at full force. He could partially process Jongdae and Kyungsoo helping Baekhyun up, leading him to the clinic. He could partially process the girl that he was crushing on pushing her way through the crowd, a clean damp towel in her hands as she approached Baekhyun with a worried face. What he couldn't process was how Baekhyun's words seemed to ring of finality and goodbye. When Chanyeol did finally process them, he felt incredibly alone, his arm suddenly feeling incomplete without Baekhyun latching on to it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

December 24, 2007, Christmas Eve.

 

"Chanyeol, honey, someone's at the door. Go get it! It might be Baekkie."

Chanyeol paused his video game and carefully placed his Gameboy down on the coffee table in the living room . He pushed himself off the carpeted floor and hurried to the door. It had been almost two weeks since his 'fight' with Baekhyun. Right after the Christmas party, he didn't get the chance to apologize since Jongdae refused to tell him where the smaller male was. Upon getting home, he tried visiting Baekhyun at his house, but surprisingly, Kyungsoo answered the door, telling Chanyeol that Baekhyun didn't want to see him. Since then, Chanyeol remained at home, mulling over his actions.

It was now Christmas Eve, meaning that he'd get some alone time with Baekhyun as they go through their annual routine of guiding the kids from their neighbourhood as they went carolling. He felt nervous because he knew how rude and insensitive he had been towards Baekhyun. Grasping the doorknob tightly, he shut his eyes before throwing the door open. Standing under the lamp above their doorway and looking rather cold in his pyjamas was Baekhyun, a hastily wrapped scarf around his neck. He smiled sheepishly (and with a hint of reservation, Chanyeol noticed) as he waved at the taller boy.

"Uh, hey." He started, and Chanyeol gave a curt nod in response. He really wanted to apologize, but the words died in his throat. Baekhyun shifted in his position before standing up straight, eyes casting downwards and refusing to look at Chanyeol. "Uh, look. I'm going to pass on the carolling this year. I don't, uhm, feel so good. Taemin volunteered to take my spot, though, so...yeah. Merry Christmas, Chanyeol."

Chanyeol couldn't say anything as he watched Baekhyun turn on his heels and run back down the steps, turn the corner and practically dash back into his own home. As Chanyeol stayed rooted in his doorway, he could see Taemin rounding the corner in the horizon. Taemin was a nice guy, one of the kids he and Baekhyun grew up with, but it still made Chanyeol feel empty as they went around the neighbourhood with the kids. It just didn't feel the same without Baekhyun's constant singing. He also couldn't get his mind off of how Baekhyun lied about not feeling well.

For the first time in years, Chanyeol's Christmas was cold, and it had nothing to do with the winter season or the first snowfall that he wasn't experiencing with Baekhyun like usual.

 

 

 

 

 

 

February 14, 2008, Valentine's Day.

 

"Kyungsoo, what's that?"

Chanyeol looked up from his book to see Kyungsoo's cheeks coloured a bright red, his arms wrapped around something protectively while Baekhyun tried to peek from behind his shoulder, a curious and inquisitive expression on his face. Jongdae was also doing the same from Kyungsoo's other side. Ever since classes resumed from their Christmas break, Chanyeol had felt out of place in his own group of friends, with Baekhyun preferring to sit beside Kyungsoo. Jongdae was still a little pissed off at what Chanyeol did. The only normal one of the three was Kyungsoo.

"I-It's nothing. Guys, get off!" The shortest of the group mumbled, his cheeks and ears visibly turning redder as Baekhyun managed to get his hands on whatever it was that Kyungsoo was hiding.

"Oooooohhhh! Jongdae, look! Look who suddenly grew balls to confess!" Baekhyun piped up, waving the little white rectangular box above, just out of Kyungsoo's reach. Jongdae grinned at them.

"Ohhh, lucky little Jongin~. Is that dark chocolate, to remind him of, well, himself, or white chocolate to remind him of you?" Jongdae teased, and Kyungsoo could only cover his face in embarrassment, hoping to all the gods that the cafeteria hubbub would be enough to drown out Baekhyun and Jongdae's loud voices.

"Give that back, Baekhyun! It's not like I'm the only one who brought chocolates today!" Kyungsoo shrieked, and Baekhyun's smile faltered. Jongdae raised an eyebrow, and Chanyeol leaned just a tad bit closer, curious at how the conversation was going.

"W-well...of course, I brought some, too! What kind of future wife would I be if I didn't give my future husba--

Baekhyun stopped himself in time, but Chanyeol heard him. He felt his heart skip a beat at Baekhyun's words. The smaller male pressed his lips into a thin line as he promptly gave Kyungsoo back the box of chocolates, trying to avoid Chanyeol's eyes. Beside Kyungsoo, Jongdae was eyeing Chanyeol.

"...sorry. That was..." Kyungsoo started, rubbing the back of his neck at how awkward their table had become.

"It's okay. I...yeah. J-Jongdae, I brought you chocolates!" Baekhyun's voice was an unusual pitch higher as he rummaged through his bag, throwing a large pink box wrapped with a gold ribbon at Jongdae's surprised face.

"Me? But..." Jongdae glanced at Chanyeol, fingers cautiously wrapping around the gift box.

"...d-didn't you hear? I'm, uh...divorced. Or rather, we never even got married. Hahaha." Baekhyun forced out a laugh as he waved his hand dismissively. Chanyeol felt a huge wave of guilt and longing hit him.

"We might as well have. And divorce requires the consent of both parties, you know." Chanyeol mumbled, and Baekhyun, as if he had forgotten that Chanyeol was just sitting in front of them, snapped his head towards him. Chanyeol could swear that Baekhyun might have snapped his neck.

"Well...you made it clear last year, anyway. Don't worry, I understand. I'll leave you alone from now on. You don't need chocolates from me when you'll probably get something from Sulli."Baekhyun reasoned, referring to the girl that Chanyeol had a crush on. Chanyeol couldn't help but notice the smile on Baekhyun's face. It was fake; guarded. This wasn't the Baekhyun that he grew up with.

Their table turned considerably quieter after that. Baekhyun wordlessly ate from his tray. Jongdae tried to distract himself by doing last minute homework. Chanyeol just picked on his food. Kyungsoo tried to uplift the mood, even using his own unrequited crush for Jongin as a topic, but to no avail. A dark cloud hung above their table, and it only darkened when Baekhyun finally excused himself. Jongdae soon followed, leaving Kyungsoo and Chanyeol to themselves.

"...you should apologize." The shorter boy muttered before picking up his tray and leaving Chanyeol to his thoughts.

Chanyeol really wanted to apologize, but the words kept on dying in his throat, rendering him speechless whenever Baekhyun was around. He blamed his pride.

 

 

 

 

 

 

March 21, 2008, Graduation Day.

 

Baekhyun wrapped his arms around his mother's waist before beaming at the camera that Mrs. Park held. The camera flashed, and Mrs. Byun promptly turned around to hug her only son, peppering his face with proud kisses. Mrs. Park then went back to her own son waiting nearby. She clapped him on the shoulder proudly, and Chanyeol smiled at her.

"Well, well. You're finally going to college, baby!" Mrs. Park cooed, and Chanyeol rolled his eyes.

"Mom, don't call me thaaat. Please."

"Aww, I'm sorry. I keep on forgetting that my baby's an adult now." Mrs. Park teased, and Chanyeol sighed in response, faking an annoyed expression.

"Whatever, mom."

Mrs. Park smiled lovingly at him before clapping her hands together, as if remembering something important. She gestured towards Baekhyun before looking back at Chanyeol.

"Tell me what time you'll be home when you go out with your friends, okay?"

Chanyeol frowned at her. "Huh?"

"Well...it's graduation night. Aren't you going to celebrate with your friends? Baekhyun, especially. You'll come home together, won't you?"

And just like that, all the light and happy feelings from having graduated dissipated, leaving only an empty and heavy feeling in his chest. He looked at Baekhyun smiling and talking excitedly with his mother, Kyungsoo and Jongdae, and when those familiar slanted eyes glanced his way, Chanyeol quickly looked back at Mrs. Park. He shook his head, and she frowned.

"Why not? You've been hanging out less with him lately...did you guys fight?"

"No...it's nothing serious, mom. We're fine."

We're not.

 

 

 

 

 

 

May 17,2008, start of university.

 

Chanyeol woke up to the sound of his mother's loud voice yelling for him to wake the hell up. Groaning, he pushed himself off the bed and trudged to the kitchen, yawning and stretching his long limbs. He soon spotted his mother bustling around the kitchen.

"Mom, what are you making?"

"Good morning to you, too, young man. I'm making your breakfast and lunch box. Share some with your friends, okay?"

Chanyeol scowled in response, taking a seat and looking at all the food laid on the table. "Mom, we have a cafeteria, just like back in high school. I don't understand why you're making me food to bring to school."

Mrs. Park stopped in her tracks, as if in deep thought. Then she gasped lightly, a look of realization dawning on her face. She casually stopped packing a lunch box and occupied the seat in front of Chanyeol. Then, she grinned sheepishly.

"...right. I forgot that. Oh well, I'll just give these to the neighbours, then. Why don't you bring some to Baekhyun and his mom, as well? Go to school together while you're at it."

Chanyeol just rolled his eyes at his mother's tendency to zone out sometimes. He quickly ate breakfast and slipped into a clean pair of jeans and long-sleeved shirt. He grabbed his hoodie from the hook on his door and bid his goodbye, hurrying out of their house and towards Baekhyun's.

He, along with Baekhyun and Kyungsoo, ended up at Yonsei University. Jongdae got accepted into Seoul National University, simply because he was smarter than the rest of them. With this in mind, Chanyeol had expected to go to school with Baekhyun every day, but as soon as he arrived at the Byuns', only Baekhyun's mother was there.

"Baekhyun left half an hour ago. Kyungsoo was here, too. They went to school together. I thought you went ahead already, dear."

Chanyeol smiled and bid his goodbye to Mrs. Byun as well, hitching his backpack higher on his shoulder as he walked down the steps. He couldn't wipe the frown off his face as he made his way to school. He didn't understand why Baekhyun didn't wait for him, but deep down, he knew. Baekhyun was still hurt from what he did last Christmas.

As Chanyeol stepped into school, he was determined to fix his friendship with Baekhyun again.

Or at least, that's what he had hoped to do. It only hit him right then and there that he didn't know Baekhyun's schedule, and when he did spot the shorter boy, he was always in a hurry, running to and fro from building to building, his reading glasses perched atop his button nose. Chanyeol finally got a hold on Kyungsoo, literally grabbing him by the shoulder and stopping him in his tracks. It seemed that Baekhyun didn't have much breaks for the first semester, and his week was full. Chanyeol could tell that Kyungsoo wasn't lying, so he let him go. Chanyeol then made it a point to see Baekhyun as soon as the first holiday occured.

 

 

...which didn't happen. Ever. Surprisingly, even though it was just the first year of college, they were already neck-deep in projects and homework and responsibilities. Chanyeol was surprised how Kyungsoo was still breathing, considering that he was taking up medicine along with Baekhyun. He also briefly wondered how those couples he saw on campus had the time to date, let alone love.

With his hectic lifestyle as a student, plans of reconciling with his best friend got pushed to the farthest, deepest corner of his mind. Years passed, and somehow, he's forgotten the reason on why he and Baekhyun, his former best friend, now only exchanged polite greetings and curt nods when they passed ways. He doesn't know what happened, and he doesn't know anymore what the constant empty feeling in his chest is.

 

 

 

 

 

 

December 24, 2012, Christmas Eve.

 

"Aish, doesn't that old geezer have a vacation to spend?"

Chanyeol grumbled under his breath as he braved the rather strong first snowfall of the year, hitching his backpack firmly on his shoulder and pulling his coat closer, making sure that the collars at least shielded his cheeks from the biting cold wind. Trudging through the snowy roads of the university on Christmas Eve wasn't exactly his plan, but his professor in his Composition class had asked him to come in and do some last minute exercises (as Chanyeol had missed some activities thanks to late-night partying). He finished at around quarter to eleven, and it was no understatement that he was annoyed.

As he neared the university gates, he spotted somebody else carrying an umbrella coming from the Science building, approaching the gates as well. He briefly thought how some professors were just plain selfish, calling in students during their break, when he caught a glimpse of who the person was under the pale blue umbrella. Chanyeol's thoughts ceased, and he could swear that time seemed to stop for a minute as he made eye-contact with him. The person under the umbrella was the first one to break the silence, stopping in his tracks and raising a hand in a form of wave, smiling slightly.

"Hi. You're here, too?" Baekhyun said, his smile remaining on a polite and guarded level. Chanyeol shifted in his spot before nodding slightly.

"Yeah. My, uh, prof called me in to do something."

"Me too."

They stayed standing under the snow, blanketed in a thick awkward silence. The tension was so thick in the air, Chanyeol thinks that maybe, if he tried hard enough, he might be able to touch it. Chanyeol looked up as Baekhyun cleared his throat.

"Uhm, you're going to get sick from all that snow, you know? Our houses are right beside each other, anyway, so, uh, if you want, I can share my umbrella with you?"

As Baekhyun stepped forward to close the distance between them, Chanyeol was suddenly hit with a wave of longing, nausea, guilt, and pent-up frustrations (mostly over himself). He stepped back abruptly, wincing as he held up his hands in a defensive stance. "No, get away!"

Baekhyun almost slipped, startled from Chanyeol's sudden outburst. With wide eyes, lips hanging open and fingers clenched tightly around the handle of the umbrella, he watched as Chanyeol started walking towards the gate. Baekhyun tried his best to hide the pain in his eyes.

"No, I-I...I can go home by myself. A little snow won't hurt me. Bye." Chanyeol mumbled quietly, leaving Baekhyun alone on the school grounds. He felt agitated and confused, and having Baekhyun around only made him worse.

He quickly hurried down his usual route home, mind swirling with thoughts. He doesn't know if it's the sight of seeing Baekhyun trying to come close, or the fact that it was Christmas again, but all the buried feelings and guilt resurfaced again upon hearing the slight concern in Baekhyun's voice. He's suddenly reminded of how he pushed Baekhyun away just because of a girl. He's suddenly reminded of how he pushed their friendship away just because of a girl, and it hurt. It hurt so much that Chanyeol didn't even hear the car honking as it sped down the icy road, almost hitting him had he not moved out of the way in time.

Chanyeol shook his head, trying to get his mind straight. It was all in the past now, and as much as it pained him to admit, it was his fault why they both drifted away from each other. Baekhyun had tried to reach out, but he pushed him away once again.

He was about to turn another corner when a loud honking from the previous road caught his attention. Turning back, he could see Baekhyun and his pale umbrella nearing the road, seemingly in deep thought, as well. For some reason, Chanyeol couldn't bring himself to move from his spot. He just watched, confused as somebody kept on honking loudly. It's only when he sees a light (undoubtedly from a car's headlights) illuminating Baekhyun does he get the situation.

From the other end of the road, headed right for the curb where Baekhyun was standing on, lost in thought and with earphones plugged into his ears, was a car skidding uncontrollably across the icy road. Chanyeol felt his world stop as the heart-wrenching shriek of the tires skidding against the road and the loud frantic honking pierced the air. Chanyeol finally snapped out of his shock, and he dashed forward, calling out Baekhyun's name, but it was all too late when Baekhyun looked up.

Their eyes met for a split second, and then--

"Baekhyun!!!

As if in slow motion, Chanyeol watched as the huge silver SUV collided with Baekhyun's small figure. Chanyeol doesn't know what happened, but the next thing he knew, he was on the ground, knees hurting like hell as he stared blankly at the mess in front of him. The silver SUV was wrecked, smashed against the wall to the point of no salvation, and underneath it was definitely Baekhyun. Chanyeol could even see his umbrella, now bent in half, sticking out from under one of the tires.

The door to the driver's side flew open, and a middle-aged woman came staggering out, all bloodied up and definitely not okay. Despite this, she still got on all fours, albeit a little wobbly and dazed, and looked under her car, trying to look for the boy that she had seen earlier. She suddenly let out a pained shriek. She looked around, and when she spotted Chanyeol across the street, she scrambled up onto her feet, face stained with tears and blood.

"Y-you...! Boy, oh dear God, h-he's...I-I don't think he's b-breathing...oh my God, that-- my brakes w-were-- c-call the ambulance!"

Chanyeol had never felt so scared in his whole life. He couldn't move, as his eyes darted back and forth from the injured woman to the car wreck, something dark forming underneath it, just near the point of crash. Blood. A pool of blood was forming.

"Baekhyun...?"

 

 

 

 

 

 

January 24, 2013, Chanyeol's new flat.

 

Chanyeol woke up to a loud knocking. He sat up, groaning as he tried to rub the sleep out of his eyes. Yawning, he listened as the knocking never ceased, if anything, it only grew louder and more impatient by the second. He briefly wondered who would know his new address. After the accident, he had moved out of his mother's house, refusing to cross 'the street' every day. It only reminded him of how he had failed to save Baekhyun.

Chanyeol blamed himself for the accident. If he hadn't rudely declined Baekhyun's umbrella offer, then they would have been together, albeit awkwardly, but still together. They would have kept each other's attention alert, and Baekhyun wouldn't have had earphones jammed into his ears. They would have seen the SUV with the broken brakes coming, and they would have gotten out of the way.

But he had done the opposite, pushing Baekhyun away and leading into that mess.

After the ambulance had taken Baekhyun and the lady away and after the police had combed through the scene, Chanyeol was still on his knees, watching the scene from afar. When he could finally move again, he quickly went back home, looked online for a cheap flat on the other side of the neighbourhood, listened to his mom crying with Mrs. Byun in the living room, and moved out the very next day. He had no detailed idea about what happened to Baekhyun, except for his mother's message of, 'he's fine, thank God'.

Chanyeol is snapped out of his thoughts when another round of loud and impatient knocking began. Groaning, he pushed himself off his feet and trudged to the door. It was six in the morning, and whoever had the audacity to--

Chanyeol was punched right on the face as he opened the door.

Reeling from the sudden attack, he cradled his face, feeling something warm trickling down his nose. He touched it slightly, and thanked whoever was out there that his nose wasn't broken. But still, it was bleeding. He looked up, glaring at whoever punched him. It was Jongdae, his fists still up in the air, ready to box. Behind him, Kyungsoo had his arms crossed over his chest, face unimpressed.

"Hi, Chanyeol." Kyungsoo started, and Jongdae snorted, letting out a dry laugh which bordered on absolute annoyance.

"More like, 'hi, you insensitive giant piece of who totally left his best friend'."

"Okay, what the is wrong with you?! Why the punch?!" Chanyeol blurted out, using the collar of his shirt to stop the bleeding of his nose.

Kyungsoo pressed his lips into a thin line before stepping in between Jongdae and Chanyeol, probably trying to avoid an inevitable brawl between the two. "First, nothing's wrong with us. If anything, you're the one who's got something 'wrong'. Second, the punch. You deserve it."

"Why?!" Chanyeol glared at them.

"Because you're not staying with Baekhyun when he needs you the most."

And just like that, with the mere mention of Baekhyun's name, the tension in the air thickened. Jongdae finally had his fists down, but he was still eyeing Chanyeol reproachfully, as if he was the dirtiest and nastiest thing that his eyes had ever laid on. Kyungsoo continued glaring back, and Chanyeol was the first one to break the eye contact, feeling guilt eating him up.

"He doesn't need me."

"Yes, he does."

"No, Kyungsoo, he doesn't. He needs people like you guys."

"Well, I wouldn't deny that." Jongdae cut in, and Kyungsoo elbowed him to shut him up.

"Shush, Jongdae. And, no, Chanyeol, you're wrong. Yes, he may need us, but he needs you more. Now more than ever." Kyungsoo pushed on, stepping forward and grabbing Chanyeol by the wrist as the taller started walking away. Chanyeol was surprised by Kyungsoo's strength.

"Go away, guys. Baekhyun doesn't need me in his life. I'll...I'll only remind him of bad things."

"But you see, that's the thing. He won't."

Chanyeol looked at him, confused. "What do you mean, he won't? I ing pushed him away!"

"He doesn't remember. He doesn't remember anything, Chanyeol." Kyungsoo's voice was low and sad. Chanyeol felt his heart beat nervously.

"Baekhyun lost his memories." Jongdae clarified.

Chanyeol stared at them, waiting for the punch line to this cruel joke. He half-expected Baekhyun to suddenly jump out from the door, his usual excited grin on his face as he yelled, "happy April's fool, future hubby! Although it's not April yet". Sadly, nothing happened. All he could process was Kyungsoo's strong fingers wrapped around his wrist, Jongdae's analyzing glare, and his realization that life .

 

 

 

 

 

 

January 25, 2013, library wing, Yonsei University.

 

"Hi, Kyungsoo!"

Chanyeol looked up from his book to see Baekhyun beaming down at them, eyes turned up into little crescents as he casually occupied the vacant seat next to Chanyeol. He felt his mouth go dry as their elbows touched, and he fought the urge to pull away. They were in the library, and they had all skipped their classes just to see Baekhyun on his first day at school (it had started weeks ago, but he was recovering at the hospital). Kyungsoo, who was sitting in front of Chanyeol, smiled back.

"Hey, Baek. Are you feeling okay now?"

"Mh-hhm. Never better! It was so boring yesterday at the hospital when you and Jongdae weren't there. Where'd you guys go?"

"To a friend. Just thought we'd catch up."

"Hmm." Baekhyun hummed, twirling the pencil in his hand nonchalantly.

All throughout their exchange, Chanyeol just watched, face devoid of any expression. Baekhyun seemed...fine and dandy. Unharmed. Chanyeol thought that maybe, Kyungsoo and Jongdae had really tricked him the previous day, plating weird thoughts in his head and guilt-tripping him. It's only when Baekhyun turns to him shyly, a curious expression on his face, does he snap out of his thoughts.

"Uhm, is there something on my face?" Baekhyun asked.

Chanyeol only stared, clearly not expecting that to be the first words that Baekhyun would say to him after the accident. He had expected something along the lines of, "why didn't you save me", or "I hate you", but not, "uhm, is there something on my face?". Definitely not that.

Kyungsoo reached across the table and hit Chanyeol on the head, ignoring the pointed look from him and throwing Baekhyun an apologetic smile.

"Sorry, Baek, my friend here's really weird like that. Uh, this is Chanyeol, by the way. He's taking up music production. He actually attended the same high school as us. Same with Jongdae." Kyungsoo said, and Chanyeol quirked his eyebrows.

"Oh...well then...nice to meet you! I'm Baekhyun." He held out a hand for a handshake, smiling brightly at Chanyeol.

Chanyeol could only stare back, as if his lips were sewed shut. Somewhere along Baekhyun's introduction, he had half-expected him to say anything about him being Chanyeol's best friend, soul mate and future wife, but none came. Baekhyun just remained smiling at him warmly, making him feel different kinds of emotions. Guilt, longing, but more on the longing part. When he sees Kyungsoo urging him to shake his hand in the corner of his eyes, it somehow hits him.

Baekhyun only forgot about him.

 

 

Later on, Kyungsoo was waiting outside his classroom. As soon as he got out, the smaller boy grabbed him by the shoulder. Chanyeol looked back at him, face unreadable.

"What are you going to do?" Kyungsoo asked, and Chanyeol knew what he was talking about.

Chanyeol shrugged off his hand before pressing his lips into a thin line. He looked down at the floor, just thinking, before looking up at Kyungsoo determinedly.

"I'll make him remember."

The corner of Kyungsoo's lips threatened to curl up into a smile. Catching himself, he cleared his throat before pushing himself off the wall. With hands shoved into his jacket pockets, he tilted his head as he looked at Chanyeol.

"Remember what?"

"That I'm his best friend, soul mate, and future husband."

 

 

 

 

 

 

February 14, 2013, Valentine's Day.

 

"Kyungsoo, where are you taking me? I have class!"

Kyungsoo rolled his eyes at him before pushing him into the elevator at the music building. The elevator went up, and didn't stop until it reached the top floor where the largest music hall was, instruments carefully placed in all spots. The doors slid open and Baekhyun hesitantly walked out. The floor was unusually quiet, save for some kind of music playing from the farthest room in the hall. It was a really sad and melancholic song, causing Baekhyun to feel a tugging sensation in his chest. The sound of the piano floated through the air, and somehow, even without words, Baekhyun could understand the song.

It rang of loneliness and isolation, regret and guilt. Baekhyun stayed rooted in his spot, and as he listened, he felt the urge to cry, like he could somehow relate on a personal level with whoever wrote the song. Just when he thought that the song couldn't get any lonelier, a violin accompaniment joined. Whereas the piano part sounded like a recording, the violin was very much being performed live. The violin part made Baekhyun think that whoever was playing it just wanted forgiveness. That was how it sounded like to him. It propelled him to finally move.

Baekhyun walked up to the room at the end of the hall, and as he peeked in, he saw Kyungsoo's tall friend, Chanyeol, sitting on a lone chair in the corner with a violin propped on his shoulders. His handsome face (Baekhyun didn't deny it) held the most pained and regretful expression Baekhyun had ever laid eyes on, and the way he played the violin had a certain desperation to it. When he opened his eyes as he finished his part, he suddenly stood up, cheeks an unusual shade of red as he gawked at Baekhyun.

"B-Baekhyun?"

"Uhm, hi. Sorry if I disturbed you. Kyungsoo kind of...forced me to go here." Baekhyun mumbled sheepishly, and Chanyeol swallowed nervously in response. Baekhyun then gestured to the violin, smiling. "You're good at that."

"U-uh. Thanks."

"It sounds...really sad, though."

"Oh. My, uh, pieces tend to come out sad, for the most part." Chanyeol shrugged his shoulders before pushing his chair with his foot towards Baekhyun. Baekhyun grinned in thanks before occupying the seat.

"You wrote that? That's amazing! But...why do you write sad pieces?"

"It's easier for me. It just comes naturally, I guess."

"Hmm...are you okay?"

Baekhyun watched as Chanyeol looked surprised before shrugging his shoulders noncommittally. "Why'd you ask?"

"Well...your song's so sad. I mean, I don't mean that in a bad way, because it was really amazing, but...I don't think you'll be able to write such a beautiful music if you weren't so sad yourself." Baekhyun asked, looking at Chanyeol carefully and trying to see past the awkward smile and guarded facade.

"I guess you could say I'm not okay, then."

"Is there anything I can do to help?"

"If...if you...ah, you know what, never mind. Thanks for asking, though."

Baekhyun pouted, watching as Chanyeol carefully placed the violin back in its case. The taller boy grabbed his bag from the floor and headed out of the door, with Baekhyun trailing behind. As they waited for the elevator, Baekhyun poked him on the arm. Chanyeol flinched, but Baekhyun didn't notice.

"Tell meeee. Kyungsoo's friend is my friend, too, so if you're not okay, we won't be all okay." Baekhyun insisted, and Chanyeol looked at him before sighing. He looked at Baekhyun straight in the eyes, and never once broke eye-contact.

"Okay, then...if you find my other half, please tell him that I'm sorry, and that I miss him. Terribly so. I really, really, really miss him, and I don't even care anymore if he screams to the whole world that I'm his future husband. Just...I just miss him. I miss being by his side, and...and most of all, I just want to say sorry for all the terrible things that I did."

Baekhyun didn't expect a full-out confession from Chanyeol about his supposed other half. The sincerity of the taller male's words hit something in Baekhyun, and when the elevator came and opened, he couldn't even move to get in. Chanyeol bid him goodbye, and for some reason, Baekhyun wanted him to stay. The sight of seeing Chanyeol go struck something in his heart. He went back to the music room where the violin was, and he played the piano recording, before taking out the violin, fingers running along the strings. For the first time in his life (as far as he could remember), he cried, and he didn't even know why.

 

 

 

 

 

 

May 6, 2013, Baekhyun's 21st birthday.

 

Chanyeol squirmed nervously beside an irritated Kyungsoo and Jongdae. They were in a karaoke room, waiting for Baekhyun to arrive. It was his 21st birthday, and they had decided to treat him out. Chanyeol wasn't nervous because of Baekhyun, but because of his present for Baekhyun. It was currently placed on the table, a blue cloth draped over it to keep it a surprise.

"Stop squirming, stupid." Jongdae muttered, and Chanyeol threw him an annoyed look.

"Sorry. I just...what if he doesn't like it?"

"He just doesn't remember you. It doesn't mean that his taste in things has changed, too. Now calm down, I think he's coming."

True enough, the door soon opened, and in came Baekhyun wearing a party hat (provided by the karaoke place) and looking very much elated at the sight of his friends smiling and greeting him warmly. He occupied the vacant couch in front of his friends before grinning at them.

"Thanks so much for this, guys!" Baekhyun said cheekily, sticking his finger into the cake on the table. Jongdae let out a disgusted grunt.

"Anything for our Baekhyunnie! Now, since you already started with the cake, might as well go on to the presents, yeah?" Kyungsoo suggested, and Baekhyun clapped his hands happily.

Jongdae's gift came first. It was a beautiful and expensive looking leather bound notebook, with an equally beautiful and expensive looking fountain pen that had Baekhyun's name engraved on the side. "You forget things easily, so here, something to help you keep track of things." Jongdae had explained, and Baekhyun gave him a sloppy kiss on the cheek (just to annoy him).

Kyungsoo's gift was a cute little blue Polaroid camera with five sets of mini-film sheets included. Baekhyun had danced around the room after that, quickly putting in the first film set and taking a group picture with his friends. Using the fountain pen that Jongdae had given him, he wrote under the photo, 'best friends ever!'.

Last came Chanyeol. He held the huge box in his hands protectively, as if suddenly insecure of his own gift, but Baekhyun had smiled at him encouragingly, just like how he did back when they were in elementary and high school and Chanyeol was trying not to show how scared he was of public speaking but then Baekhyun would be there, smiling at him before daring anyone to make fun of his future husband. Holding out the box, he placed it in front of Baekhyun before pulling away the cloth that was covering it. Baekhyun let out a soft gasp.

Inside was a small and fluffy brown ferret, scurrying around in his little cage happily, seemingly having difficulty staying in one place. Baekhyun remained silent before squealing happily, suddenly throwing himself against Chanyeol, arms wrapping around the taller male's neck. Chanyeol suddenly had a hard time breathing. Kyungsoo and Jongdae shared knowing grins.

"Oh, thank you, Chanyeol! Thank you so much! It's so cute! I'll name it Channie! Oh, thank you!! I've always wanted a ferret!" Baekhyun gushed, refusing to let go despite their close proximity. They could practically feel each other's breaths fanning on their faces.

"Y-you have?"

"Hmm! Someone who was once really, really close to me had a ferret once. I even proposed that I should just marry him so I can see the ferret every day." Baekhyun snorted, finding his own anecdote funny.

However, to Chanyeol, Kyungsoo and Jongdae, it was anything but funny. It might have been simply the most wonderful thing they've heard in months, especially for Chanyeol. Baekhyun was finally showing hints of remembering his lost memories--

--of remembering Chanyeol.

 

 

 

 

 

 

December 25, 2013, Christmas Day.

 

Chanyeol opened the door to his old house (he had moved back to his mom for the Christmas holidays) to a smiling Baekhyun, Kyungsoo and Jongdae. They had all decided they were going to spend the Christmas over at Chanyeol's house. They all clutched paper bags in their hands containing gifts for each other (Chanyeol had his up in his room). Kyungsoo pushed past the taller male, muttering something about helping Mrs. Park in the kitchen. Jongdae dragged Baekhyun up to Chanyeol's room, to which Chanyeol panicked, saying that he hadn't cleaned up his room yet.

Upon arriving, the room was a mess. Clothes were strewn up all over the floor, music sheets lay scattered on the table, and the bed was unmade. The cabinet doors were thrown open, revealing Chanyeol's amusing collection of colourful Spongebob boxers, to which Baekhyun and Jongdae had a good laugh about. Thankfully enough, they were nice enough to help Chanyeol clean up his room (as they were sure that they would be hanging out in there for the day).

While Chanyeol was busy trying to take back his boxers from a cackling Jongdae, they didn't notice Baekhyun sitting quietly at Chanyeol's study desk, hand holding something delicately as his fingers ran over something. When the two finally stopped bickering, they only noticed Baekhyun's silence then. Chanyeol turned to look at him, and felt the wind get knocked out of him. In a bad way.

Baekhyun was holding Chanyeol's old Gameboy. Specifically, the very same Gameboy that Baekhyun had given him when they were little kids. Chanyeol could still remember how Baekhyun had literally jumped on him, snatching the Gameboy from his hands and hastily writing something on the back with a permanent marker.

"'CHANYEOL, from Park Baekhyun!! ♥'. I didn't know you had a brother with the same name as me." Baekhyun smiled up at him, and despite his usual blinding smile plastered on his face, Chanyeol could sense that even he didn't believe it.

"U-uh...well..." Chanyeol stuttered, and right then, Kyungsoo barged into the room with Mrs. Park behind him, both holding trays full of food and snacks. Chanyeol had never felt luckier in his life.

He honestly didn't know how to get out of that situation. He knew that Baekhyun still hadn't let it go, what with the smaller male's constant curious glances directed at him. But as the day pushed on, thoughts of kid scribbles on the back of Gameboy consoles were left forgotten.

 

 

Later on, as Baekhyun, Kyungsoo and Jongdae were walking home, Baekhyun suddenly remembered something. Latching on to Kyungsoo's arm, he hummed thoughtfully before speaking.

"Hey, Kyung-ah."

"Yeah?"

"I didn't know Chanyeol had a brother."

"What are you talking about? He doesn't have a brother. Jesus, we only need one stupid Chanyeol in this world." Kyungsoo snorted, and Baekhyun laughed with him, but his mind was on something else.

Or someone, to be specific.

 

 

 

 

 

 

December 23,2015, Chanyeol and Kyungsoo's shared flat.

 

Kyungsoo walked into his apartment to the hushed sounds of something from the living room. Frowning, he checked his watch and scrunched his nose in disdain. Two in the morning, and his flatmate was still up watching the goddamned television. Dumping his stuff on the floor, he hurried to the living room, hell-bent on giving his flatmate an earful.

"Yah, Park Chanyeol, it's two in the morning, what are you doing wasting electrici--

"Yes, mom, I'm going to marry Chanyeol!"

"Nooo!! You're not! I don't want to marry you!"

"But I want to!"

Kyungsoo stopped in his tracks upon hearing children's voices. Peeking into the living room, he saw a lump wrapped in a thick Mickey Mouse comforter on the couch. A large hand peeked out of the lump, fingers loosely enclosed around the remote control as the video on the television continued playing unwatched, casting bright Christmas colours on the living room. A lone Gameboy console lay near Chanyeol's hand. Kyungsoo walked over and knelt down beside the lump before taking a look at the television.

A little chubby boy's face beamed up at him, and Kyungsoo let out a small smile.

"Mom, mom, I can marry Chanyeol, right?!"

"Sure, honey. Ask him again when you're grownups."

"Yay! I'll get to see Chanyeol's ferret every day!"

Kyungsoo couldn't help but laugh at how innocent the intention was. The sound jolted Chanyeol awake, and Kyungsoo turned to him, eyes full of mirth as Chanyeol tried to recollect his thoughts as he sat up. Running a hand through his hair, he quickly pressed 'stop' on the remote and looked at Kyungsoo.

"Oh, you're back." He said, voice raspy from sleep. Kyungsoo nodded before sitting comfortably on the carpeted floor, taking the Gameboy into his hands and running his fingers along the messily written CHANYEOL (with a small from Park Baekhyun!! ♥) on the back.

"Yeah, had a long night at the hospital, and then I come home to you watching home videos at two in the morning." Kyungsoo raised an eyebrow at Chanyeol, and the taller man shrugged his shoulders before finally turning the television off and slouching back in his seat.

"I was fixing my stuff and then I saw some unlabelled VHS tapes. Thought I'd take a look before throwing them away."

"...you're going to throw these away?"

Kyungsoo didn't miss how Chanyeol slightly flinched at the accusing question. Sighing, the shorter of the two heaved himself off the floor and slumped down beside Chanyeol on the couch. He casually took a throw pillow into his arms and fluffed it up before hurling it at Chanyeol's face with so much energy and force that the taller male actually got pushed to the other end of the couch. He could only stare incredulously at Kyungsoo, too lost for words to even snap back.

"Yah! Why are you going to throw away the videos ab0ut Baekhyun?! Are you giving up?!"

"I-"

"Shut up! Shut up, Chanyeol! You told me you'd make him remember! You...! Baekhyun, he'll....he'll remember you eventually. Why are you giving up?!" Kyungsoo's voice shook at the end, and Chanyeol suddenly felt fed up and tired.

He stood up to his full height, glaring at Kyungsoo as if he was the one at fault. Running both his hands through his own hair, he groaned before letting out a deep sigh.

"I'm tired, okay?! It's been what, two ing years? I'm tired of this...this...thing! I'm tired of re-establishing whatever thing we had before! He won't remember me. Ever! What's the point?! Life's playing a cruel joke on me! When I realized that Baekhyun's important to me, that he's more than just a best friend, he doesn't even remember me! He remembers our childhood, but my face is a total ing blank. I-I...I can't do this anymore! I know that it's Baekhyun there, but it's not the same! He's...I can't 'start' anything with him when I haven't even asked for forgiveness...I..." Chanyeol suddenly slumped down, the energy and rage suddenly leaving him limp.

Kyungsoo frowned, coming closer and patting his shoulder. "Chanyeol..."

"What's the point...? I miss him...I just want to say sorry..."

Before Kyungsoo could say anything, the phone rang, the sound seeming ominous in the dead of night. The shorter of the two jumped up, quickly picking up the receiver. Chanyeol looked up at his friend. He suddenly grew very nervous, preparing himself for something as Kyungsoo's face blanched, the phone receiver in his hand dropping to the floor as an added effect. Chanyeol opened his mouth to say something, but was cut off by Kyungsoo.

"Get your coat. We're going to the hospital."

"What?"

"He slipped."

"Who?"

"Baekhyun. He hit his head, and he's unconscious."

 

 

 

 

 

 

December 24, 2015, Seoul General Hospital.

 

Chanyeol stayed seated beside Baekhyun, holding the smaller male's hand firmly and tightly, as if he was afraid that the smaller boy would suddenly disappear into thin air. Tubes were attached to his nose, arms and mouth, and a gauze was wrapped around his head. He looked pale and sickly, and the only signs that he was still alive was how his eyelids fluttered. Chanyeol was dead tired, but he couldn't bring himself to sleep, not when Baekhyun wasn't safe.

"Chanyeol-ah...you can go home now, if you want. I'll take it over from here, honey."

Chanyeol looked up to see Mrs. Byun standing at the foot of the bed, eyes puffy and a strained smile on her face. Her hair was hastily tied up, and her cardigan was inside-out. Honestly, she looked worse than Chanyeol. Letting go of Baekhyun for a while, he stood up from his seat and enveloped the older woman in a hug. She was like a second mother to her.

"Aish, this ahjumma. Go home, take a shower, rest on a comfy bed. You look like you'll drop dead any moment now. I can take care of Baekhyun." Chanyeol whispered, and he felt Mrs. Byun relax in his arms.

Pulling away, she cupped Chanyeol's face lovingly and smiled.

"Thank you for staying with my son. Even after all that happened, you're still with him, even if he doesn't remember you anymore. Chanyeol, thank you."

Chanyeol nodded his head in acknowledgement, and walked her out of the hospital until the taxi stand. Once she was gone, he hurried back to Baekhyun's room. He let out a sigh of relief as he saw Baekhyun, still in one piece. Taking his previous seat, he took Baekhyun's hand into his again and pressed it to his lips. It alarmed him how Baekhyun felt so cold.

"Baekhyun-ah...wake up...please...? I'm sorry for pushing you...you know, when we were in high school? When our fall out started...I'm sorry. I miss you so much, you know? Like...like how you always tell everyone that you're my future wife, and how you'll always hold on to my arm, snuggling closer and...and..."

Chanyeol stopped himself as soon as he realized that he was crying. Wiping his tears with the sleeve of his jacket, he laced his fingers with Baekhyun's, looking at his face sadly. It's sad, Chanyeol thinks, how he only realized how beautiful and perfect Baekhyun is when he's on a hospital bed, unsure whether he was still going to wake up or not. It's even sadder, Chanyeol concludes, how his first kiss with Baekhyun was stolen, and while the other was dead unconscious to boot. Chanyeol fell asleep to the depressing whirr of the machines in the room, Baekhyun's eerily clammy hand enclosed in his own calloused ones.

 

 

 

 

 

 

December 25, 2015, Christmas Day, Seoul General Hospital.

 

Chanyeol woke up to an empty hospital bed. He sprang up to his feet, the sleep suddenly out of his system as he scanned the room for Baekhyun. The smaller male wasn't anywhere. The tubes weren't anywhere, either, nor was there an IV stand. He remembered seeing in movies how patients just haphazardly pulled the tubes out and left a mess, but the room was surprisingly neat. He checked the clock, and groaned inwardly. It was already noon. He had always been a heavy sleeper.

Running out of the room, he looked around for Baekhyun. He wanted to ask the nurses where his friend was, but everyone seemed busy, going about their daily rounds of checking the patients. He ignored the curious looks everyone threw him and set to work, walking fast across the halls and peeking into rooms, looking for Baekhyun.

As he reached the lobby, he could hear the receptionist playing Christmas songs on her radio, successfully making the wandering patients smile. It was then that it hit Chanyeol; it was Christmas. Glancing at the decorations in the hall, he briefly wondered if he was going to spend another Christmas wondering if Baekhyun would ever regain his memories. Pushing the negative thoughts away, he quickly dashed to the back garden of the hospital where some patients, mostly old people and those staying in the facility for rehabilitation purposes, stayed and basked under the sun.

He let his eyes scan over the place, and frowned when he didn't see Baekhyun. He was about to turn back when he heard a familiar voice, squealing about how he finally caught something. Chanyeol whipped around, and there, in the corner of the garden and under the shade of a huge tree, was Baekhyun.

He was wearing a thick yellow parka with the hood pulled back, revealing his tousled brown hair. Underneath the parka were his casual clothes and Ugg boots. Relief washed over Chanyeol upon seeing how fine and healthy Baekhyun looked. He wondered why he was out of his hospital gown already (he could only assume that Baekhyun was already checked for release). As he walked over to where Baekhyun was crouching, he could see the smaller male hunched over something and seemingly cooing at it. Before Chanyeol could call his attention, Baekhyun looked up at him and smiled so brightly.

Chanyeol thinks that he may have forgotten how to breathe. With the afternoon sun beaming down on Baekhyun, Chanyeol blames it on how he was abruptly awoken. The sun seemed to make Baekhyun glow, his hair seemingly the softest and his skin seemingly the most flawless Chanyeol had ever seen them. The way his cheeks had a natural blush to them, and how his smile seemed to be so genuine and familiar and just plain heart-warming had Chanyeol blurting out--

"Will you marry me?"

Baekhyun looked at him strangely before breaking out into a fit of laughter. His eyes turned into little crescents as he did so, and that's when Chanyeol sees the thing that he was previously hunched over, now carefully tucked and cradled into his chest. A ferret. Of all things. Chanyeol felt the heat rush to his cheeks as Baekhyun just kept on laughing, and Chanyeol thinks that he's just made a total fool of himself.

"I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to! That was so weird, I know. Oh God, I'm sorry, Baek, uh, forget what I said." Chanyeol hurriedly explained, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly.

At this point, Baekhyun had finally recovered. Securing the ferret with one hand, he carefully stood up and wiped the tears from his eyes with his sleeve. He smiled at Chanyeol.

"Why should I?"

"Huh?"

"You finally proposed to me. Took you long enough."

"I don't understand..." Chanyeol scrunched up his eyebrows in confusion, and watched as Baekhyun approached him. When he hears Baekhyun's next words, Chanyeol found himself smiling so widely, he thinks that he might rip his cheeks in two.

"At this point, though, don't you think that marriage is a little too early? I know I say that I'm your future wife and all that, but we should do this properly! Go on dates, get to know each other more even though we already know each other like the backs of our hands, and most of all, fall hopelessly in love with each other, though I think we're already getting there. Don't you think so, too, Chanyeol?" Baekhyun grinned shyly at him, closing the distance between them as he leaned forward, his forehead bumping slightly against Chanyeol's nose. Chanyeol laughed.

"I...I think so, too." He couldn't even bring himself to say anything else aside from that, the relief and happiness filling his insides too much to make him think properly.

Baekhyun beamed up at him before pulling away. He grinned knowingly, before pulling up the ferret in his hands and holding it up towards Chanyeol. "For now, do you want to pet my rabbit?"

Chanyeol smiled as he remembered the first time that Baekhyun has ever said that, and lets a blissful thought occur to him, 'he finally remembers'.

For the first time in years, Chanyeol spent his Christmas together with Baekhyun, his other half, wondering how they should make more special memories.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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