03. Reminiscence

Unintended
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03. REMINISCENCE

 

I wonder if you know how amazing you are You leave me breathless You didn’t even try but you stole my heart and I don’t want it back

 

KRIS

I was 20 years old - young, naive, and rebel - when I first met her nearly a decade ago at the exclusive party held by one of my parents' business affiliates. I had just returned from U.S after finishing my study and at that moment, I could say that I was being the hot topic between most heiresses from other companies.

 

"She is here." Sehun remarked. His lips formed a smile as he gazed at the main entrance.

 

"Who?" I asked, getting curious with the sudden interest in his voice.

 

"The ice queen. Choi Soojin." Jongin answered while shifting his eyes to the spot where Sehun was looking at now.

 

I knew that name. She was like everywhere. You could find her all over the internet or in the pages of business magazines. Her parents owned the biggest telecommunication company in South Korea and as the company heiress, the media put much attention on her.

 

I turned around to see how she looked like in person. She was flashing her smile to some men who greeted her but it wasn't like a flirting gesture. She simply smiled at them because she wanted to be polite. I could hear Sehun murmured something to Jongin but I didn't really pay much attention to them. There was something about her that invited me to watch her. Then it happened. Choi Soojin stared back at me with he almond shaped eyes.

 

I could swear that for some moments, my world stopped spinning for a while...

 

I could still remember how my heart reacted as those beautiful orbs pierced as if into the depth of my soul, looking through me. My mouth dried, my mind went blank for a while. Choi Soojin radiated an energy that was so powerful, so intense and it corrupted practically everything around it, including me, making the 20 years old me forgot how to breathe for the first time in my life.

 

The way she looked at me was completely different with any other women looked at me. She didn't want me. She simply looked at me with the most innocent way I could remember and there was nothing more, and yeah, it somehow hurt my pride. And when she removed her gaze from me as she walked to the balcony, retreating herself from the crowds, I just continued watching her until her figure was completely gone.

 

"Holy Jesus, she is the most beautiful woman I have ever seen." Jongdae said, completely drowning in his adoration over her beauty.

 

"Will I have a chance if I ask her for a dance?" Jongin wondered.

 

"You are not her type, Kim Jongin." Sehun sneered.

 

I quietly listened to my friends' talk but then something strange poked my heart in one most unfamiliar way when I recalled the moment of my eyes meeting hers. But as a Casanova myself, I didn't let the peculiar feeling bought me. I never found women as luxury creatures I need to worship with my soul or as fragile creatures I need to protect from any harms. And so did Choi Soojin.

 

When for most people there was a logical order in relationship; attraction, infatuation, love, and heartbreak, but not for me. No. ing. Way. Thus in that stupid love believer theory, I only comprehended with attraction and if I was attracted to a woman, then it would never be more than just finding her woke up on my bed. So, I got myself a woman to that night and everything seemed back to normal - with a lot of denials and so much effort I managed to reassure myself that I didn't want Choi Soojin that way.

 

Our second meeting was easier for me. I could watch her from far while sipping my wine. Or at least that was what I thought before my mother suddenly left my side to approach the Choi and when she returned with the couple and their shining inheritor, it almost gave me a heart attack. I couldn't tell if her presence intimidated me. Even if it was true, I was too arrogance to admit it but the day was marked as the first time I heard her voice and it sounded so melodious to my ears.

 

Then there were myriad meets with Choi Soojin in numerous occasions I attended after that. Yet I never tried to make a move on her. We never had a conversation. If our gazes met, Soojin would nod slightly at me, recognizing me and I would only do the same to her. It became a habit for both of us, leading me to one final conclusion that I would never see her the same way I saw women around me. And no matter how many times I found my heart, mind, and soul betrayed me every time Soojin came into my sight, I was forever denying myself.

 

But really, I had too many scruples for my own good at the fact I never tried to approach her. However, although I had enough experiences with woman, Soojin made it abundantly clear to me that if I attempted to cross the boundary I created myself, I would regret it because even a demon didn't an angel. So when sometimes I found myself staring at her a little too long and a little too longingly, the image of Soojin underneath me, for my name and begging me to her, those never crossed my mind. And that was simply because I respected her. Too much to bed her only to satisfy my lust.

 

I didn't want Choi Soojin on my bed. Or rather, not just on my bed. Because I need her in my life, in my ing existence.

 

And the feeling frightened me much. I did anything I could do to revise my mind, to get rid her off my mind. I ed more often only to regain my belief that women were just instruments to satisfy my lust so that in the moment I met her again, I would no longer see her with any peculiar feeling stirred my heart.

 

And apparently, I succeeded in my mission but one thing I could never stop; I continued to admire her beauty, adoring her attitude and intelligence. Period there. Because I never tried to know her better; I was too afraid to get something that would make me find her much desirable. Naïve? Yes. I was inexperience with the crazy little thing called love.

 

It was just another regular party like I usually attended and truthfully, I never saw it coming. I arrived earlier than Soojin and I was chatting with Jongin when Soojin stepped into the ballroom. I could notice her arrival because no one looked as shining as her to my eyes. She was wearing her ruby satin gown and looked as dazzling as ever, but I couldn’t see the usual gleam in her eyes when our gazes met. She looked tired and there were bags under her beautiful almond eyes. She went directly to the bar, ordering a glass of wine.

 

I continued to watch her, almost breathless, as she swirled the wine in her glass expertly. She brought the glass to her nose, and sniffed before placing the glass to her plump lips and tasted the wine, holding it in for a while before swallowing. Then she opened her eyes, smiled warmly to the bartender.

 

Meanwhile, I had been adjusting myself on my spot because the sight of Soojin tasting wine was the most alluring thing I had ever witnessed. Choi Soojin was not merely beautiful; she was breathtaking, like a masterpiece. And she was not just breathtaking; she was sensual and hypnotic, but also innocent. Her pretty eyes reflected a depth of emotion and radiant purity that I always tried to ignore – I wanted to ignore.

 

But that night, I could no longer deny myself. The feeling was too strong, too intense. And I didn’t like it when she was smiling to the bartender; I wanted her smile only to me. So I decided to cross all the boundaries as I approached her. There was something about her that invited me to come closer. Choi Soojin was the only girl who made me stop considering myself as a Supernova when I was in her presence. Persistently, I still believed that it wasn’t love I felt for her.

 

“Kris, are you happy with your life?” It was Soojin who asked me first. Her question took me by surprise as no one ever gave me the same question.

 

“If the life you talk means having this handsome face of mine (at this point, I could hear her chuckling), doing the things I love, a

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Galaxyboo_
#1
Chapter 31: This is realistic, if I'm in Soorin's shoes, I'll choose sehun too. But in Soojin case, she has someone who lover her but she didn't love him back but she also has someone who she love and love her back so why should she choose Chanyeol when Yifan himself not even bad guy. I mean he didn't hit her, cheat or have any toxic personality that makes her better off without him. So yeah this situation is kinda complicated tbh. It can change depends on the person. In some situation i would choose Chanyeol over someone I love if the one I love don't even love me back or if he actually love me, but he is toxic so yeah.
dreamshun
1803 streak #2
Chapter 7: soorin is like a child
dreamshun
1803 streak #3
Chapter 6: kris, you need to come back to your senses
dreamshun
1803 streak #4
Chapter 5: i feel bad for soorin T_T
dreamshun
1803 streak #5
Chapter 4: right what if it was just a scheme like Kris said 😳
dreamshun
1803 streak #6
Chapter 3: omggg so much angst I'm loving it 😭💖
dreamshun
1803 streak #7
Chapter 2: aww
Justanordinaryfan2 #8
Chapter 30: This was the most beautifully written fic I've read in a long time. I can't describe in words how Kris character made me feel a roller coaster of emotions and how much I wanted the world for him , his love for Soojin was so pure so selfless so mesmerizing it makes me want to have my faith in love too. Thou at some points I hate Soojin for being so stubborn towards her own happiness but I really have to admit her love for Kris also made me speechless .
This was so good author I am so happy I found this *-*
growlol
#9
Chapter 30: wow i cried reading this, the way you portrays about love from the pov of diff character in this story really amazes me i love it so much i feel like you’ve delivered the meaning of love very deeply in this story! i highly respect kris’ love towards soojin, how he respects her decision eventhough it hurts him & knowing that he probably will never learn to love again, that shows how great of his love towards her damn im so touched! i also can’t believe soojin is way more stubborn than i thought hahaha, but she’s actually just too kind & selfless to think about others more than herself. However, i’m so disappointed with chanyeol, he was still selfish until the end, it’s not love but more of an obsession. I’m glad it ended very well, kris & soojin finally get the happy life together like how they deserve! i’m happy that soorin has finally found love in sehun too, it was a well written story!
Bluberry_eri
#10
Chapter 31: Amazing story ❤️