You know that feeling of impatience you get when you’re waiting for something to happen? When it seems like traffic is moving too slowly, and all the traffic lights are suddenly red, and 15 minutes feels more like an hour? That’s how Jiyong felt on his way to Seunghyun’s. The time couldn’t have been moving slower. It had been a while since he’d driven himself anywhere, but instead of being cautious and driving the way they’d taught him in Driver’s Ed two years earlier, he was speed-demoning down the road. It probably hadn’t taken long to reach Seunghyun’s house but he sighed out of relief when he’d made it, although the closer he got to the front door the more he started to feel the other sort of anxiety. His hand clutched tightly to the bag of stuff he’d brought to Seunghyun, his other hand gripping his cane and his oxygen tank slung casually over his shoulder. It only took a second after he rang the bell for someone to answer the door.

                “Hi. Can I help you?” she was an attractive-looking 40-something year old woman. Jiyong wondered if she was Seunghyun’s mother. They sort of had the same face; thin, shapely lips, narrow and short nose, and a deep philtrum.

                “Um… I… um, is Seunghyun here?” Jiyong stuttered out, thinking of course he’s here as soon as the stupid question left his lips. Where else would he be but confined to his bedroom? The woman eyed him a moment, as if she was trying to recognize him.

                “Are you one of his friends? He’s not really supposed to have visitors, sweetie,” she smiled a little.

                “Oh… he told me I could, yesterday. I’m Ji… we met at the hospital. And um, support group…” Jiyong replied, unsure of himself. Seunghyun’s mom seemed to register the name and she hesitated a moment before replying.

                “I should’ve realized… your tank,” she commented. Her eyes glanced back into the house as if she were contemplating whether or not it was okay. “Um… he’s been talking about you. I take it he’d really like to see you. Maybe just for a moment.”

                “He’s not supposed to have visitors? … Wait, he was talking about me? What did he say?” it crossed his mind that Seunghyun had already spilled the beans to his parents, too, but Jiyong wasn’t going to say anything until she did.

                “Yeah. He just said that you were the one that invited him to support group and that he should call you. Things like that,” the woman smiled a little, opening the door wider. “How rude of me! Come in, sweetie.” Jiyong did. “Top’s in his room upstairs. He’s really supposed to be isolated to minimize his chances of getting infection, but I think it’ll be okay if you go upstairs for a while. But you should probably wear a mask. Can you breathe okay in a mask?” she asked, referring to Jiyong’s cannula and tank. Jiyong nodded. “Alright, I’ll get you one before you go up. Oh, sorry, I’m Top’s mother. You can call me Mrs. Choi.” She held out her hand to him and Jiyong shook her hand, smiling a bit.

                “I assumed. Seems I was right,” he commented. “Um, ma’am?” Jiyong started, watching her dig through a medical bag for facial masks.

                “Mhm?”

                “Why … um, do you know why he’s at risk of infection?” Jiyong asked, trying not to sound concerned, although he was sure that he probably did.

                “Oh… well, it’s nothing to be worried about. With blood diseases like his… since his healthy blood cells are so low, his immunity is low, too. That’s all. The doctors say it’ll be better after he receives his first blood transfusion. He’s on antibiotics, too, to help keep him from getting sick. IV right now, since he’s having a hard time keeping anything down,” his mother was talking fast and matter-of-fact. Jiyong remembered his own mother behaving this way when he was first diagnosed. Maybe, he figured, it was easier for moms to deal with the big C if they could treat it like a task or a job instead of… a life-threatening disease that their child was fighting. She handed him a face mask. “Here. Do you need help putting it on?”

                “No… I’m used to them,” Jiyong smiled a little before putting the mask on. “Is it alright if I just go up? He’s awake, right?”

                “Oh, yeah, he’s okay. Just knock first. He might even be up. But if he is, make him get back into the bed,” her eyes took Ji in for a moment. Sadness seemed to wash over her, but she sighed and smiled anyway. “You’re the first of his friends to visit,” she commented. That didn’t surprise Ji. His school friends kind of dropped him once he started treatments, too.

                “I think he’d prefer to see me, anyway,” Ji commented, fighting a little smile. He didn’t want to give things away. He wanted to be cool about it, since Seunghyun’s mom probably didn’t know and Seunghyun probably didn’t want her to know. But Jiyong thought there was almost suspicion in her glance when she looked up at him. “Um, anyway… I’m gonna go on up, if it’s okay,”

                “Can you get up the stairs alright?” she asked, glancing at his cane. Jiyong shrugged. He’d actually not given stairs a try in a while. “I’ll help you,” Seunghyun’s mom offered before he could really answer. He shook his head.

                “No, it’s okay. I can do it,”

                “Baldilocks,” Ji pushed the door open just a crack, peeking into the room. He’d forgotten to knock; he was too excited. When he looked in the room, he could see Seunghyun. He was sitting in a desk chair beside his bed watching something on a television that Ji couldn’t quite see, yet. He glanced at the door as if he was shocked when he heard Ji’s voice. The confounded look on his face made Ji laugh.

                “I’m not contagious,” Seunghyun commented, smirking at the sight of Ji. “What’s with the mask?”

                “Oh. Your mom said you’d like die if I breathed on you, so…” Ji replied casually, closing the door as he entered the room. “You look hot. You know, for a bald dude.”

                “Shut up,” Seunghyun chuckled a little. “Are you gonna wear that the whole time?”

                “The mask?” Ji shrugged, plopping down on the edge of Seunghyun’s bed. “Even your room is fancy as . Damn, are you people that rich?”

                “We’re not really rich,” Seunghyun commented. “Are you gonna wear it the whole time?”

                “Um… I dunno, I think I’m supposed to. Why? Does it creep you out?” Ji commented, staring at Seunghyun a little harder than intended. He looked tired. Not really sick, just tired. And he was still handsome as , and Jiyong was trying hard not to freak because he’d forgotten how damn hot this guy was in person.

                “No, it’s not that it’s creepy,”

                “Oh, your mom said get back in bed,” Ji commented, and he handed Seunghyun the burlap bag that held the graphic novels he’d brought for him. “This is for you, by the way.”

                “What’s with this bag, man?” Seunghyun chuckled, and Ji smiled, even though Seunghyun couldn’t see it.

                “Something my sister brought me. Anyway, it’s what’s on the inside that counts, so shut up and open it,” Jiyong replied, taking the liberty to lie across Seunghyun’s big, soft bed. He watched, pleased with himself, as Seunghyun opened the bag and took out the things. Seunghyun gave him a confused look again, and Ji laughed.

                “Comic books?”

                “Graphic novels. Geez, I thought you’d be nerdy enough to get it,”

                “I get it,” Seunghyun chuckled a little, flipping through the pages of one of the books.

                “They helped me a lot when I was bored as and going out of my mind,” Ji smiled. Seunghyun nodded. “Do you like them?”

                “Yeah. Thanks, man, I bet they’ll come in handy,”

                “You can keep those. I have like a million of them,” Ji pushed himself up a little, staring at him. “And I brought you some anti-nausea lollipops. You should really try it.”

                “Yeah… Thanks, but… thanks,” Seunghyun frowned a bit, placing the bag on the floor; leaving the lollipops inside. “You wanna read one with me?”

                “Right now? Sure. But your mom said… to make you get back in bed,” Ji smiled, patting the space beside him on the bed. Seunghyun smirked a little. “Hey! Gutter brain, that’s not what I meant.”

                “Yeah it is. I can see it in your eyes,”

                “Seunghyun.”

                “You want my body. You wanted to wait til I was in a vulnerable state so that you could have your way with me,” Seunghyun , getting up from his chair and sitting beside Ji on the edge of the bed, placing the stack of comics on the other side of him. Ji blushed. He didn’t know if Seunghyun was coming on to him or playing around, but it was a little more than he was expecting and suddenly he couldn’t look at Seunghyun.

                “That’s… not what…” he hesitated, his eyes avoiding the young man sitting next to him. Seunghyun smirked one of those sickeningly overconfident smirks, and Jiyong let out an exasperated sigh.

                “How can you breathe with that mask on?” Seunghyun asked him, his voice husky with desire as his hands went to remove the thing. Ji grabbed his hands, his eyes widening suddenly.

                “Your mom said you’ll get sick, don’t,” their eyes met. Ji blushed; violently, he was sure.

                “Come on, Ji… I even took special care not to be sick today so that I could kiss you. You can’t leave that thing on the whole time,” Seunghyun pleaded with him. His hands defiantly pulled the straps from behind Ji’s ears, but Ji still held onto his hands, holding them in place.

                “… I wanna kiss you, too, but not if you’ll get an infection. Your mom said your immune system isn’t good,”

                “It wasn’t good the first time we kissed, either, and I’m fine,” Ji could tell that Seunghyun was getting frustrated. He knew what it felt like; when you were telling everyone you were fine, and they kept being so over-protective. He’d been on the other side of this conversation so many times. Well, not this particular one, but similar conversations. It and Ji didn’t want to treat Seunghyun like those other people, so he moved his hands and let Seunghyun take the mask away. “Unless … you didn’t want me to take the mask off because you forgot to brush your teeth this morning.”

                “… Are you saying my breath stinks?” Ji laughed a little, but his laugh was stopped by Seunghyun’s hand cupping his chin, and then Seunghyun’s lips were against his. It was soft and tender at first and Jiyong couldn’t breathe. He inhaled sharply when Seunghyun deepened the kiss, his hands securing themselves around Jiyong’s waist. Jiyong gripped the front of Seunghyun’s shirt, lightly when the older guy slipped his tongue inside of his mouth, but he didn’t challenge him at all, allowing Seunghyun to explore his mouth however he needed to. And it felt like he needed to.

                He only took a short break to say “It seems fine to me,” and Jiyong could only get out a small giggle before Seunghyun’s mouth had taken his again. Jiyong wondered why he had even hesitated to kiss Seunghyun. He wondered how he even lived up until this point without Seunghyun’s kisses, and he whimpered a little when Seunghyun pulled away.

                “Which one should we read?” Seunghyun asked calmly, his voice still husky with desire and his dark eyes looking into Ji’s as if he had been thinking the same thing. He pecked Ji’s lips again. Ji couldn’t figure out what the hell he was talking about; nothing mattered anymore but Seunghyun’s lips.

                “Hm?” Ji murmured, grazing his pinkish tongue over his lips, lost in a haze of lust and infatuation.

                “The comics. Which one?” Seunghyun clarified, peeling Jiyong’s hands off of his shirt and scooting himself to the head of the bed, pulling Jiyong by the hands towards him.

                “Hm?” it took Jiyong another moment to remember that he had brought Seunghyun a stack of graphic novels and that they were going to read one together. “Oh… whichever one you want to read,” Ji finally responded as Seunghyun pulled him into his arms, carefully sliding the oxygen tank off of Ji’s shoulder. Jiyong was in heaven. He’d never been held like this before. He’d never known he even wanted to be held like this before Seunghyun.

                “Let’s read the X-Men one,” Seunghyun suggested, his arms wrapping themselves around Jiyong’s waist.

                “X-Men vs Apocalypse Vol. 1. That’s a great one,” Jiyong commented, trying his best not to react as Seunghyun pressed his lips into his forehead. He exhaled slowly, his eyes closing as he bit down on his bottom lip. “S-Seunghyun…”

                “I’m sorry. I just… I’ve been dying to see you,” he apologized. “Am I moving too fast, again?” Jiyong just shrugged, chewing nervously on his bottom lip. “Should I have asked your permission?”

                “What’s with the ‘permission’ thing?... It’s just because… um… this is the first time anyone… I dunno,” Ji pursed his lips in abash, his face a light pink color. “I’m just not used to this.”

                “This? … Affection?” Seunghyun chuckled a little, and Jiyong fought a smile.

                “Shut up. … As sad as it is, I guess… I… seem to be experiencing a lot of firsts with you,”

                “Yeah, but I mean… you never even cuddled with a crush under the jungle gym in elementary school?” Seunghyun teased, although he really was curious. It seemed a little unfortunate that Jiyong hadn’t seemed to have had any kind of romantic interaction at all.

                “It’s not like I was exactly… popular. And, plus, little kids hug each other all the time. That’s not the same thing as … well, this,” Jiyong’s fingers traced over Seunghyun’s arm, admiring the tone of his skin and the tendons that dressed his muscles. He wondered what it was that this gorgeous human being saw in him. There were bandages on his hands where the IVs had been. Jiyong stopped short of tracing over them, instead admiring the way Seunghyun’s large hands gripped his waist. It made him feel small, dainty, but not in the pathetic was he usually felt small. It was a good feeling; a cozy one.

                “Having fun?” Seunghyun asked, smiling a little when Jiyong looked up at him. Their eyes held each other’s gaze, and then Seunghyun kissed his nose. Ji laughed.

                “Hey! That was my move! You can’t steal my move!” Ji complained playfully.

                “It’s not your move until you actually do it. So far, your only move is freaking out whenever I touch you,” Seunghyun teased, pleased with himself.

                “Shut up, ,” Ji laughed, a gummy, hearty laugh. Seunghyun looked pleased; tired, but pleased. “I just get nervous around you… it’s because you’re like… this really hot guy and I don’t even get why you like me. It doesn’t even seem like reality, most of the time.”

                “I thought I was a gross baldy,” Seunghyun corrected him.

                “Ah. Yeah, that’s right. Baldilocks,” Ji concurred. Seunghyun kissed him; light and quick, but it took Ji’s breath away. “You have to stop. I think I’ll pass out if you do it again.” He exhaled sharply.

                “… Are you serious? Is it your lungs?” Seunghyun’s expression was full of concern, and he lifted up a little, checking the capacity on Ji’s oxygen tank.

                “No. No, it’s fine. I have enough, stop,” he blushed. “I just get flustered… makes it a little harder to breathe.”

                “Then… the only solution is for you to get used to me,” Seunghyun insisted, rubbing a hand over Ji’s back and looking into his eyes. “It… might help if I give you just one more kiss…”

                “It might,” Ji smiled, despite himself. Seunghyun began to lean in; Ji stopped him. “But… your mom is here.”

                “So?” Seunghyun blinked, exasperated with Jiyong’s nervousness.

                “So… what if she comes in and all she sees is us making out?” he asked shyly, his brownish eyes wide and innocent. Seunghyun chuckled a little, and he sighed, giving up. His head lay against the pillow, his eyes glancing at the unwatched TV that was playing some kind of kids show about talking toys.

                “Maybe we should just read,” Seunghyun replied. It wasn’t really that he was afraid of his mom coming in or anything. He was just tired, and he didn’t want to keep pushing Jiyong if he wasn’t ready for that level of intimacy. But Jiyong felt guilty. He stared at the side of Seunghyun’s face, his thin fingers casually tracing invisible shapes on Seunghyun’s chest.

                “I at this, huh,” Ji lamented.

                “Just a little. But it’s okay,”

                “I’m sorry?”

                “What? No, you don’t have to be sorry. I shouldn’t push you when you’re not ready.”

                “… It’s not that, really,” Ji sighed, biting down on his lip.

                “It’s alright. Seriously. You don’t have to explain yourself to me, Ji. I’m just a little affectionate… I’m an all-in type of guy, is all,” Seunghyun reassured him, although Ji didn’t find it very reassuring. He stared; gaped, really; at Seunghyun’s face as if he had just been scolded. Seunghyun glanced at him, his tired eyes studying the innocence and wonder in Ji’s, and for a moment, they said nothing. The two of them just stared at one another, curious eyes and uncertain gazes overpowering every previous thought. And then Seunghyun moved Jiyong’s tank and he rolled Jiyong onto his back and just as if they were in sync, Jiyong pulled him down and they were making out again. This time it was all desperation; tongues arguing and throats deeply and Jiyong felt Seunghyun move between his legs and for the first time he felt him. “I don’t care if she comes in,” he whispered, and Jiyong didn’t worry about it anymore, either, because he knew that was true. There was only the feel of Seunghyun’s lips, of his tongue and the warmth of his mouth. Jiyong gasped for air and Seunghyun let up long enough to let Jiyong catch his breath and then he was at it again. Seunghyun was dominant, but not forceful, and his sensual kiss sent feelings surging through Jiyong like electricity. He d and grasped Seunghyun’s body, shamelessly, his leg hooking around Seunghyun’s waist. He did his best not to psyche himself out, although part of him was freaking out that he was actually making out with this guy and he could feel Seunghyun’s and it was hard and it excited him.

                Thud. The two of them jumped at the loud sound and Seunghyun scrambled to sit up, afraid that his mother would come running to see what the sound was. (And maybe he hadn’t been completely honest about not caring if she caught them?) It was the graphic novels. Seunghyun cursed under his breath as he looked at the pile of books on the floor. Jiyong huffed breathlessly, sitting up a bit to stare at the pile, too.

                “The books,” he exhaled; he’d still not caught his breath. His hand was clutching Seunghyun’s shirt, and he was leaning on him a little for support. Maybe the hardcore making-out was a little too much too fast for his ty lungs. Seunghyun started to move Jiyong, his nervous eyes glancing at the door, but then he seemed to relent and his arms wrapped around Ji and he his back gently.

                “Shh. Just breathe, catch your breath,” Seunghyun whispered.

                “I’m fine,” Jiyong assured him; he didn’t get upset this time. There was a knock on Seunghyun’s bedroom door, and the boys both looked up at it nervously.

                “Top, honey? Is everything okay?” his mother called from behind the door. It took everything in Seunghyun not to shout “DON’T COME IN!” Instead, he just winced and he managed a calm reply.

                “Yeah, Ma. We just dropped some books,”

                “Okay… be careful,” she responded. She never came in. Jiyong was relieved. It wasn’t like he was used to making out with people. He definitely wasn’t ready to be caught doing it.

                “That was close,” Ji exhaled. Seunghyun shushed him, cupping his hand over Ji’s mouth.             

              “She’s probably still listening,” he whispered, glancing suspiciously at the door. “She’s not gonna let it go that easily.”

                “Mmhmmph,” Ji glared at him, peeling Seunghyun’s hand away.

                “Sorry,” Seunghyun smiled innocently.

                “My ,” Ji rolled his eyes. “Don’t do that. I hate that. Plus, your hands smell of cheese and penicillin,”

                “Rude. That’s because I’m on meds,” Seunghyun looked offended, but he couldn’t seem to prevent a smile from forming anyway.

                “What happened to ‘I don’t care if she catches us’ anyway?” Jiyong teased and Seunghyun shushed him again. The doorknob began to turn.

                “See? ,” Seunghyun whispered, scrambling out of their particularly intimate position and settling beside Jiyong as if nothing had been going on. Jiyong didn’t mean to laugh, but he did anyway.

                “Catches you doing what?” Seunghyun’s mother asked suspiciously as she poked her head into the room.

                “Uh…smoking joints and laundering drug money,” Seunghyun replied innocently, smiling at his mom. Jiyong laughed even harder.

                “Sure, normal things,” Seunghyun’s mom nodded. She seemed like a cool mom. Jiyong wondered why Seunghyun was afraid for her to find out. “But seriously, whatever you guys are up to, cut it out. You’re both in no position for shenanigans.”

                “We were just … playing around and the books Ji brought me fell off of the bed. No harm done,” Seunghyun assured her. “Plus, mother dear, we’re both adult male men people. We don’t need supervision.”

                “Seunghyun does,” Ji commented, prompting a sharp look from Seunghyun. Jiyong smiled at him in reply.

                “I know, I know, but I’m just concerned. This is a … scary week for me, sweetie. For our whole family,” his mom looked sad again. Jiyong glanced at Seunghyun; he looked a little sad, too.

                “Yeah. But really, everything is fine. I’m okay,”

                “It’s my fault. I accidentally kicked the books. Sorry,” Ji smiled, trying to rescue his friend. Or whatever the hell they were at this point. Mrs. Choi looked at Ji with empathetic eyes, and she nodded a little.

                “It’s alright. Okay, I’ll leave you two alone. You’re probably sick of being babied. But, Top, in a little bit you need to let me reattach your IVs. It’s almost time for your medicine,” Mrs. Choi’s eyes shifted to Jiyong again as she spoke. “Where’s the mask I gave you?”

                “Huh? Oh, I…” Ji blushed.

                “He couldn’t breathe right, so I took it off of him. He’s not really supposed to cover his mouth or nose,” Seunghyun explained calmly. His mother looked at him like he had three faces for a moment, and then she shook her head, exhaling.

                “Alright… well, maybe it’ll be okay. Alright. Alright, I’m worrying too much. I’ll just go,” she chuckled a little, eyeing the boys once more before finally leaving. Seunghyun sighed loudly, flopping backwards onto the bed.

                “Christ!” he exclaimed, running a hand over his newly-bald head. “Lock the door. Wait… wait, I’ll do it.” He sat up again, slowly sliding off of the bed.

                “Are you sure you’re okay? You’re moving kinda turtle slow,”

                “Yeah, man. I’m good. You’re the one that needs a cane,” Seunghyun bragged, strutting to the door as if to tease Jiyong. Ji smirked a little, shaking his head.

                “You know, it’s truly unfair for you to tease me about my labored walking,”

                “Yeah, it is, huh,” Seunghyun knocked on the door and then listened, to see if his mom has truly left. She seemed to be gone, so he glanced back at Ji, smirking. “But didn’t I make it up to you, before?”

                “Hardly,”

                “Come on, that was some epic kissing,” Seunghyun bragged.

                “You can’t pre-pay, though. That doesn’t count as ‘making it up’ when you kissed me before you said the rude thing.” Jiyong smiled shyly as Seunghyun approached him, and he squealed when Seunghyun’s lips connected with his neck, and he didn’t resist as Seunghyun laid him back again. “Mmm… but that might help.”

                “Do you still want to read comic books?” Seunghyun asked against his skin, his tongue trailing lightly over Jiyong’s neck and to his collarbones. Soft kisses ran the length of Jiyong’s collarbone and Jiyong shyly Seunghyun’s newly bald head.

                “In a while… just… keep doing that, for now,”

Author's Note: Hey guys. D: I really ... really didn't mean to wait so long to update. Initially, it was because I was trying to re-imagine some parts of the story. Then, school picked up and I couldn't really get a good enough break to write on this story. But, because it was such a wait, I decided to write some cute GTOP and give you guys a long update. Anyhow, an announcement. I've been reading up on writing ESL(English as a Second Language) characters, and I've decided that writing Ji's parents with broken/labored English can be offensive to some people, so I'm still reimagining them. They will be the same, but I'm either going to have them communicate with Ji largely in Korean (just, with that specified. Of course, it will be written in English), or I will just write their dialogue in English without any specific markers to how they actually speak. In the meantime, I'm not going to write them for a while. It will be okay, because I can just focus on what's going on with Ji and Seunghyun for a while. And Seunghyun's parents are Korean-American in this story. Anyway... I'm sooo sorry for always having such long breaks. I'll try to upate more regularly, now. I will have more time. :) And thank you to all of you who continue to read and subscribe and comment. I'm happy that so many of you are enjoying this story! I'm enjoying it, too!