Chapter Twenty-One

"It's fantastic, don't you think? Spending the whole day with me."

8th of January 2015

“We’ll talk about this tomorrow, alright? We’ll think things through if we really want to meet up with them. For now, you focus on studying. I’ll see you soon.”

The words of her sister kept repeating over and over again despite just hearing that a moment ago. She couldn’t help but think it again and again, unsure if she really wants to go for the dinner. Half of her tells her to go while the other half says no. The half that agrees to go wants some sort of explanation throughout her problematic years while the other half that objected greatly feared for Hee Young’s sanity and mind.

You can’t just come back all of a sudden like this; you can’t do this to a person.

Hee Young exhaled silently, walking back towards her dorm but as she stood by the entrance of the building, a soft whistle had made her stop her tracks. Her eyebrow perked up as she heard the whistle again but this time, she gently looked over her shoulder to lock gazes with a familiar pair of eyes. She didn’t believe this was real and as she narrowed her eyes, the image only became clearer.

A pair of arms formed a heart shape – and their arms were so small from a distance.

“Whatever you choose, noona, I’ll support you!” A child-like voice echoed in her mind and she blinked hard, trying to confirm if that was real or not. As she focused her vision on that spot, she noticed how it wasn’t the person she thought it was – it was Mr. Kang.

“What are you doing wandering around like this?”

She turned around, hands still in her pockets as she looked at him, “I have legs – so I can.”

Mr. Kang scoffed, out of the tone that Hee Young had used on him but truthfully, it had no effect on him. He grinned in the next, saluting her with a hand, “I’ll see you tomorrow?”

She noticed how the look Mr. Kang gave her was different – was today a day where she would focus on the way people looked at her? She could take note of how he had this ray of hope just shining at her with his eyes that stared at her. She noticed how he was brighter now; he was happier. She shrugged with a sigh, backing her way into the building, “Probably.”

Initially, she planned to just walk back straight to her dorm to relax for a bit before coming out to the balcony. But as she walked by the two doors that indicated where the balcony was, she noticed a slight breeze brushing against her skin of her face. She stopped almost too soon, far away from her dorm as she stood there. She could hear a boy’s sigh and as much as she didn’t want to, she was curious.

It can’t be… it is only 8.46p.m….

She took the courage to look to her side, peeping out of the window of the door to see a figure leaning against the brick wall. The fact he was wearing headphones would be the reason why he didn’t even notice the door opening. She tried being as silent as she could as she closed the door behind her and in the next, she was by the railings. Her hands were still tucked into her pockets, due to the cold, chilly night as she stared at the scenery before the both of them.

As if he didn’t know she was coming, he took a glance up only to take a double take at the person he saw.

“H-Hee Young?” His voice came out in a soft, almost inaudible whisper but there was no denying the confusion hidden in between.

She managed to let out a small smile before turning to look down on him. He had his back leaned against the brick wall like earlier, as if he hadn’t move since then. He was facing her side profile as she hasn’t turned to face him just yet. He plugged his earphones off his ears, setting his phone down after switching off the music, “I didn’t expect you to come now.”

She looked away for a moment, taking the time to appreciate the sight and silence before breathing out, “Well... I came here to empty my mind but… I guess I can’t-“

“I’ve been waiting for a while,” He cut her in between, making her look down at him with a different look. He couldn’t exactly tell if it was a ‘are you kidding me’ or a ‘what the hell’ look.

“Just because you’re early doesn’t make me late.”

He let out a scoff and shook his head; could he possibly like a girl like this?

However, he noticed how when she looked away, she became quiet. There was this look in her eyes despite seeing it from the side and there was this feeling of him wanting to know more of her. Funny, he was never really curious of anything, before. He could see how she exhaled heavily before she glanced at him again, only to notice that he was staring at her. She raised an eyebrow, having a staring contest with him for about a minute before she said, “What?”

He didn’t know where he found the guts to say this, but, “What’s on your mind, really?”

She exhaled deeply whilst looking away, staring at the view before her as she processed his words. He really did sound different and he was like another person. Maybe… maybe he did change.

“Yah, you’re not deaf, right?”

Nope. He didn’t exactly change just yet.

She let out a soft laugh and short one, too. She turned around, letting her back face the railing before she sat down on the ground. She gently rested her back against the firm railings before she turned to look at him, “Yeah, I heard you but… there’s just way too much on my mind to actually let it all out.”

He raised an eyebrow, leaning forward as he came just a bit closer, “That bad?”

“Yeah,” She nodded once monotonously as she stared down on her hands in her pockets, “It’s ed up…”

He noticed how sad her voice was and no matter how strong, bold she was… definitely she’s not everything she seems. He swallowed hard and he had thought of saying something back that would come across as ‘serious’ or anything like that but he didn’t want that. Instead… he wanted to make things brighter on this dark night.

“C’mon. Don’t tell me your brain is jammed or something.”

She noticed the humor in his voice and well, she did appreciate it. At least he wasn’t being that bad tonight.

“If I tell you, don’t go around spreading it like you get paid for it.” She warned, causing him to put both hands in front of his chest, “Hey, I’m not into that .”

She let out a soft ‘tch’ before she looked away, thinking of what she should say – or rather, which part of her life should she reveal. However, he decided to show that he was waiting as long as trying to make the atmosphere less gloomy.

“What can be more ed up than getting called to the principal office-?”

“My mom is the bride-to-be of our principal.”

She caught how his eyes widened more than usual – a sign he was definitely surprise. Then again, no one would expect these very words to come out from , anyway - apart from Minseok, of course. His lips parted to say something, but he quickly sealed them up, afraid he’d actually let out something offensive. She managed to see his lips parting again and like before, he didn’t know what to say – what does one actually say?

‘Oh… Well… At least you’ll be able to eat in the teacher’s lounge?’

You’ll get slapped for that; or kicked, in this situation.

Noticing his struggle, she cut him off the pressure, “We don’t have to go in depth. What song do you have in mind?”

He shook his head, “I’m not here to choose songs, yet.”

She narrowed her eyes at him, finding this a bit odd – then what’s the whole purpose of being here?

“I plan to get to know you better as my partner first before we narrow down our genre, song choice and dancing style. So, you’re occupied for the whole day tomorrow.”

She gave him daggers through her eyes as she stood up along with him – apparently, discussions were over.

“Yah! You can’t just tell me I’m booked for the whole day and expect me to be alright with that. This needs a mutual agreement from the both of us and as far as I know, only you’re down with this shi-“

Kai pulled out his phone during the whole time Hee Young had her moment to speak but unfortunately, it was cut off short. He flashed her phone at her face and she squinted her eyes a bit from the brightness as she snatched his phone, “Jesus, can’t you show me like a normal person?”

He smirked and shrugged, putting his hands casually into his pockets as she read the text message from Mr. Kang.

‘I think it’s best the both of you get to know each other more, connect with one another before planning which song choice; that’s my advice for the both of you. Preferably, tomorrow – after class. P.S. you’ll have to break down the news to her.’
5.02p.m. || Mr. K

She gave a displeased look as she shoved returned him his phone, “Great…”

He gave her an overdone, happy look, all to mock her, “It’s fantastic, don’t you think? Spending the whole day with me.”

She noticed the mockery behind his voice and she clenched her fists. He eyed that and he was swift enough to back away, “D-Don’t hit me again, you hear me? We need to dance the whole day tomorrow.”

She cracked her fingers, nearly cutting him with her sharp gaze, “Not if you get injured…”

He quickly flung the balcony door open, not caring if it was beyond late in the night. He stepped out whilst bidding his goodbye hurriedly and in the next, she was left out on her own. She managed to give a small smile upon seeing his response – he wasn’t that bad, anymore. Maybe it was just her misconceptions from the past but… well, once bitten, twice shy. She had to be on her guard now despite of the little ‘mutual connection’ the both had. It didn’t matter, really. It’s not like she was going to pursue dancing in the end.

But… she was going to make it worthwhile.

At least, for now.

As if he was under some sort of spell, he was left in a daze as he stood by the empty corridor, far away from the balcony as he leaned against the wall. He rubbed his face with both hands, still wondering, “Did I really just say that?”

He blinked a few times, trying to see if this was some sort of dream just in case he dozed off or anything but… no. This was real. What he had just said out in the balcony, was real. That ‘Are you for real?’ look she gave him was so clear to him. It must not be a dream. It can’t be.

He was amused of himself and his capabilities of getting across such message that he turned around, making his way back to his dorm. He reached up to pat his own shoulder, grinning discretely, “Way to go, Kim Jongin.”

“Hey! So, where shall we have lunch tomorrow?” Minseok asked excitedly, pushing away his books as he leaned back against his chair comfortably. Listening to her voice really does…. Never mind.

“Uh… I think we’re going to need to cancel lunch tomorrow. I… I’ve got some dance practice tomorrow for the whole day. Sorry, Min.”

“Ah… really?” He tried to hide the disappointment in his voice but it was hopeless, Hee Young could sense that in a heartbeat. “I didn’t know, really-“

“Yah, you’re so weird. It’s just lunch, no?” Minseok cut her in between, trying to sound chirpy and cheerful but… she’s not getting fooled anytime soon. It’s been way too long they’ve known each other.

“I-I’ll make it up to you, alright?

“I’ll hold that against you, then! Hey, I’ve got to go, I’ve stuff to do. Good luck tomorrow!”

“Y-Yah!-“

She couldn’t even say her piece as Minseok abruptly hung up on her, making his friend who shared rooms with him slightly suspicious. Junmyeon sat up on his bed, peeking over at Minseok who seemed so blur after ending the call. He held onto his phone tight, staring at the screen and Junmyeon could roughly tell what was wrong.

He casually looked back down on his book, pretending not to care, “She cancelled plans again?”

Minseok’s eyes widened slightly upon hearing the tone in Junmyeon ’s voice – he didn’t hear, did he?

Minseok glanced over his shoulder, only to see Junmyeon  reading his textbook, “Yeah but… I guess it’s no big deal.”

Junmyeon smiled a bit, glancing up to give Minseok a look, “No big deal? You’re disappointed.”

Minseok faced forward, grumbling softly, “Stop with your psychology crap…”

Junmyeon laughed, closing his book as he set it aside, “I didn’t even say much!”

Minseok put his phone down on the table, shoving it aside before he brought his books in front of him, “Yeah yeah yeah,” Minseok flipped the next page before burying his chin in his palm, “That’s what you always say…”

Junmyeon relaxed himself on the bed, sitting up against the bed rest as he held his textbook in his hands. “All I know is that you may have competition in liking her, Min.”

Minseok didn’t want to acknowledge Junmyeon’s words but… how could he not? Junmyeon was never the type to make up lies and certainly, Junmyeon, being a person majoring in Psychology would know better than him; even he could read Hee Young’s expressions better.

Minseok meekly slid his chin against his palm to look over his shoulder, meeting with Junmyeon’s gaze. “W-What?”

“Just enough.”

Kyungsoo let out a small smile, looking up to Kai, “What are her majors?”

“Why do you need to know?”

Kyungsoo shook his head, standing up from the bench as he turned around. He gave Kai a pat on the shoulder, “You see how you answer things about her? Usually, you’d give me a full explanation about everything but with her, you’re trying to hide something – as if you know everything. You’re confused, Kai. And only you can fix that.”

Junmyeon stood there, behind a tree as he was walking by but… he couldn’t help but just stop upon hearing a familiar name. A name that would certainly interest his roommate. Kyungsoo of course, walked away and along the way of walking around the park bench, he passed by Junmyeon, who was in the same major as him.

“See you later.” Kyungsoo waved politely as he walked by the latter and Junmyeon gave a nod with a wave, “See you.”

When Kyungsoo walked away, supposedly back to the campus, Junmyeon faced forward to notice how Kai slumped over the bench with his face buried in both of his hands. He let out a frustrated cry, echoing the silent garden in which only contained him. And Junmyeon, of course.

“Get it together, man! You can’t like her!”

Junmyeon smiled – that’s the same phase Minseok went through. Funny, he remembered Minseok seeking help from him as well when he was going through this phase.

Denial.

It was already starting and Kai didn’t even realize that.

“So you might want to think about actually doing something. After all these years, Minseok.” Junmyeon advised, leaving Minseok to just let out an incoherent sound as he faced back to his books, “I got it, grandma. Now just read your book.” Minseok chided, attempting to look focused on his studies. Junmyeon snorted but he let Minseok have the last say as he mumbled quietly, “Alrighty, then.”

In the midst of trying to read his book, he let his mind sidetrack to think of what Junmyeon had said. Minseok gulped hard as he glanced away to his camera, giving it a small . ‘Just a while more and it’ll be ready… Then I’ll show her… I just need more time…’

He moved his hand away from his camera, returning to his lap as he gave himself a note of encouragement; ‘You’ll have enough time and you’ll gather up the courage to show it to her. Just… a bit more then it’ll be done. I hope she’ll at least give me a chance.’