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A birthday fic for my cousin/abbeoji~~~ LULU-YA~~~

of course anyone can read this but just gonna warn you that it's packed with private jokes....

Soooo, Lulu de baba, I was supposed to upload this and send you the link like 5 minutes before your birthday ended cause I wanted you to be thinking of me LAST on your birthday...but yeah...got into editing and : (

but anyways, here's part of your birthday present this year! Sorry, I know it's written in such quality ._. and sorry this is so ridiculously short....idk what's with my brain lately...just doesn't wanna function ya kknow? ya know.

Ok now go, read.

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You lazily pushed your key into the keyhole, pretty damn sure you were gonna die....so Baekhyun came up to you and sang "Baby don't DIEEEEEEE~~ tonight~"

"die tomorrow"

... It'd been a long and tiring day at uni, and as usual~ you had heaps of books to finish and start reading. Not just read them, but analyse them carefully whilst taking notes and writing essays and journals and what not. You loved reading but this was not your cup of tea *insert Sehun pokerface (sorry)*... If you were going to read, you wanted to do it in your own time. Deadlines were mean...innit................(please tell me you guessed who I am)
You pushed the door open, and as you walked into your home you could feel a throbbing pain at the back of your calves.

You noticed the dim lit living room and realised Kai was home. Usually you'd say 'Hi' to him, but today you just felt like dying in a nice, warm, and cosy bed that lay flat across the ground in the corner of your room. You were relieved to find that your bed had stayed as neat as you left it in the morning.  You possibly could have killed yourself by now if Kai had sat on your bed and left creases on the covers again. Or if your pillow had turned at a slight angle so that it wasn't straight anymore. But nope, the guy was safe and sound today.

So you dumped your bags and heavy books on the bed - don't worry you can tidy it later!- and took off your jacket to go in your wardrobe. Just as you were going to dive into the bed covers and sleep the evening away, your annoying boyfriend barged into the room with his two friends, Lay and Chen.

"HEPHY BIRSDAAAYYY...!!!" Kai shouted with his signature grin plastered on his face, and his arms wide open...........no.....you did not just- *ahem*

You started laughing when you could pheel that birthday awkwardness...until you noticed Kai's and Chen's smiles fading away...the two of them rolled their eyes and glared at Lay.

"Lay, what the hell man..."

Lay just starred with his innocent face before Chen flicked his forehead to wake him up.

"you were supposed to pop the party popper....?" Kai reminded him

".....Ohhhh...."

He smiled his dopey smile as he yanked the string at the end of the party popper and all the confet-

"WAH...!!!" Kai screeched as he jolted behind Chen and hogged his shoulder.

Chen just snorted at Kai, whilst Lay...was just confused.

"Who told you to pop it now?!?!?!?!"

You sighed and shook your head as you started to pull your quilt out from under the pillow.

"Hey what are you doing!" Kai asked as he grabbed the quilt from your hand and threw it back to the bed.

"You can't sleep now....we gonna PARTAY~~"

"whaaaat?! Party? Andwaeeee...." you sulked

"Ahhhh shikreo shikreo shikreo!!" Kai wasn't gonna take that attitude from you. He ran behind you and forced you out of your room up to the door of your living room, which was shut. You could hear whispering and fidgeting and some "shh!" here and there. Yeah...exo were terrible at surprises. Chen opened the door for you and to your horror, the 9 members...who tried...to stand in uniform as they all shouted "HAPPY BIRTHDAAAY!!" and Chanyeol had started to blast out a heavy beat as Baekhyun went over to where the light switch was and did his thing.

You were so close to killing yourself right now and looked up to ask God why your life was so difficult........only to see a picture of Chanyeol's creeper face stuck to the ceiling. You swore you were gonna die tonight.

You turned around, in desperate hope to escape the birthday hell that exo had created, this time finding Kai guarding the door with his arms folded, and that STUPID...COCKY....SMIRK!!!
You stared at him, attempting to look sad so that he just might let you go....but he only smiled cutely while shaking his head.

Just then, Kyungsoo came over to break up the silent conversation. He grabbed both your hands and flashed his dorky and bashful smile as he wished you a happy birthday. You smiled back and thanked him, when Kai came over this time, to separate yours and Kyungsoo's hands with his angry face. Kyungsoo chuckled as he patted Kai's back. "I'm not gonna steal your girlfriend, don't worry..."

But Kai still looked angry, and you were confused as to why. Then it clicked in your mind.

"I'm not gonna steal your boyfriend, don't worry...."

and there you saved his possessive little as he slung an arm over Kyungsoo's shoulder and walked him away from you.

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The 13 of you had a blast with the dancing machines of the group who took turns to do some short dance performances, and Chanyeol and Kyungsoo beat boxing here and there, and then the vocalists did some singing, and then....Kris and Sehun...who..... faced you to death...

"Right, now are we gonna eat this cake or what?! I'm starving!" said Xiumin

"shutup, flounder" hissed Sehun, with his usual straight face

The Baozi pouted sadly ..."ah waee.."

Just then, Chanyeol swift past while mumbling "my pain be creeping~", then had a chocolate bar whacked at his head from Sehun.

You were really wondering why the boys had put up to all this, they weren't even paying much attention to you, it was more like a party for them just to chill out in. You turned your head to see an empty sofa, and you went to sit down in it. Once Kai saw you taking a seat and leaning your head back, he decided to go over and sit next to you. You were a little disappointed at the unexpected warmth of another body next to you but when you looked up and saw Kai's face, you went back to relaxing yourself. You felt a bulky arm make its way around your body so he could hold you as he gently rested his head against yours. He held your hand in his and starting fidgeting with your fingers

"I know this isn't your ideal birthday...sorry about that...but I wanted to take you out on a birthday date someday when you're not busy...I know it won't be on your actual birthday but, it's better than going on a busy date, right...?"

"aigoo, don't be sorry stupid....thanks for arranging all this...it's your damn thoughts that count~" you fluttered your eyelashes with a silly pout that just drove the guy to lean forward and kiss you. Just as your lips met, you heard some violent sobbing to which you snapped your head to the direction of....and disappointed Kai in the process of it.

Next thing you know, Chanyeol has turned the music down and all the members are looking at Suho in confusion. There he sits on a chair, leaning his elbow on the table, covering his eyes with his hand while he sulks.

He pulls out a £50 note from his pocket and wipes his eyes and nose with it....."I just want to be tall enough so that I can lean down to kiss a girl..."

You and Kai look at each other with straight faces...

while Kyungsoo and Luhan walk over to Suho and gently rub his thigh for comfort *I swear to God, I am so sorry XD*

And then Tao buing-buinged umma Kyungsoo to bake some of his mind-blowingly-awthum-cookies stuffed with chanyur quack...once every one of you had had a cookie each, you all went crazy and died one by one.

You wake up the next day in heaven and realise....you can finally....marry....all 12....members..... ;A;
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*Awkwardly scratches head and then looks at you then quickly looks away and wants to die and then decides to run away from you and does a few back flips on the wall and jumps over a plant and...*

Hope you.....l.....l....liked......it.....

Happy birthday anyways....you'll always always always be my favourite abbeoji 3 I don't even joke when I say that... ok ma!

K. THNX. BYE.