Tally Up, Tally Down

Before Kyungsoo even opens his eyes, he knows whose face he wants to kick first thing in the morning. He damn knows whose pants he wants to stick a roaring razor in, and said little asswagon is probably laughing in a hidden corner somewhere behind a clueless giant Park Chanyeol or Saint Angel Zhang Yixing, so that the EXO resident healer’s “chiu, chiu” can guide him out of Hell’s gates when Kyungsoo finally gets his eyebrows clean. Yes, his eyebrows, because a little named Byun Baekhyun has slaughtered all the hairs on his forehead with Chanyeol’s infamous minty green toothpaste.

When light finally shines through the cracks of his eyes, Kyungsoo feels himself tear up because of the minty gel pasted over his eyelids. He’s still half asleep, pissed as , and can only mutter, “when the even…?” when his hands make a beeline to his forehead.

“Hey, Kyungsoo hyung! Have you seen m-?”

Jongin halts in his grand entrance as he stares at the groggy elder-slash-(now)-swamp-monster slowly getting up from bed. “… Uh…”

“What?” Kyungsoo asks, squinting. His forehead feels raw because the dried toothpaste is now slowly cracking as he flexes the muscles. “Oh, this,” he figures out for himself, rubbing at the paste as he tries not to let the tears fall. There are mysteriously salty droplets in his eyes, but Kyungsoo swears it’s just his body reacting. Baekhyun would never make him shed genuine tears. Never in a million years.

“Yeah…,” Jongin replies, watching as the top layer of the toothpaste wreck flakes off into the blanket below. Kyungsoo groans in response because the bottom layer is still damp and mushy and gross, and oh, yes, that reminds him.
 

“Byun Baekhyun, you little !” he screeches out, voice booming through all the doors and walls and windows of their two-story dorm. Somewhere far away, probably in the depths of Chanyeol and Baekhyun’s shared room, Kyungsoo hears a distasteful cackle going “Ha-ha! Ha-ha! Ha-ha!”

Yes, the is ing laughing.
 

“Good morning! Howdy do, howdy do?” 174 centimeters of sassy and shrewd manner finally walks in, stifling a laugh that is clearly not doing him justice. “How do your eyes feel today, Do Kyungsoo? You don’t look too well.”
 

“ you, Baekhyun,” Kyungsoo seethes, barely able to keep his eyes open.

“Oh? Is this the sound of a tally I hear?” Baekhyun sings in response, waving a hand in the air by his ear. “Yes, I believe it is!” he yells with a firm nod, running straight for the whiteboard set up in the middle of the dorm living room. “Scooooore!”

Three lazy pairs of eyes follow him as he speeds past the couches and weaves through the tables. The whiteboard standing at his destination is marred with a myriad of tick marks, multi-colored and multiple months old, that indicates the number of successful pranks pulled by whom. “Kyungsoo: 253 | Baekhyun: 257” reads the bottom, a sum of all the blue, red, black, and green. Baekhyun adds a victorious tally to his side of the board and wipes away the 7 to replace it with a big, fat 8.

“Byun Baekhyun, you watch your back!” Kyungsoo yells from inside his room. Baekhyun breaks into a fit of hysterical laughter as Sehun finally bursts, snickering by the couch next to him. The proud victor of round 511 wipes the tears from the corners of his eyes as he lets out a satisfied hum. Monday mornings are definitely glorious.

 ಠ益ಠ |◔◡◉|

“I need to know why Kyungsoo is at the table with half a tube of toothpaste over his eyebrows,” Junmyeon says at breakfast that morning when all the members have managed to crawl to the dining table for their meal. “Baekhyun, care to explain?”

Chanyeol and Jongdae giggle as they stuff their mouths with a spoonful of rice. Stern leader Junmyeon shoots them a warning look, but instead of shutting up, the two burst into a full-fledged laugh fest with grains of rice flying out of their mouths. The grains fling across the table, which gets Sehun cracking up as he points at the white specks in Luhan’s hair. Luhan is an easy-going fellow so he laughs it off, which gets Yixing giggling because Luhan laughs like an ugly mule. Next to them, Tao’s cheeks are bursting and raw from watching the whole show, and Kris laughs, too, because the EXO-M maknae looks hilarious with his spoon half in his mouth and half out, tittering like a dumb monkey. The only reason Baekhyun is grinning is because he knows he’s the cause of the whole laughing mess, and Minseok laughs because Baekhyun is oblivious to the glares Junmyeon keeps shooting him. The only person not laughing besides Junmyeon and Kyungsoo is Jongin, who is tending to Kyungsoo’s hurt pride by rubbing on the poor soul’s eyebrows in an attempt to wipe the gel off.

“Ingrates,” Kyungsoo mumbles under his breath, getting up from his seat. Jongin’s arm is suspended in the air because Kyungsoo gets up so fast.

“Hyung, what about your breakfa-“

“Trash it,” Kyungsoo cuts, walking away to the room before locking it with an angry click! Jongin slumps like a bruised puppy as he watches his roommate storm off into their room alone.
 

“Baekhyun, aren’t you even scared that Kyungsoo will stop making us breakfast one day because of your antics?” Junmyeon sighs once the raucous laughter dies down. To this, Baekhyun throws his hands up in exasperation as he spits out the same excuse as always.

“But Kyungsoo pulls pranks on me, too!”

 

凸(ಠ_ಠ)凸

"Kyungsoo hyung?" Jongin calls, knocking on the door. The older doesn't respond, however, so Jongin sighs. "Hyung, open up."

"Leave me alone," comes Kyungsoo's gruff reply. "Who the even cares?"

"Hyung, please," Jongin says to the wooden door, placing a palm on the cool knob to give it a shake. "Let me in."

"Go the away before I smash the door in your face, Jongin," Kyungsoo barks back, and the younger flinches.

"Okay then, break the door," Jongin responds, taking a step back. "At least I'll be able to get in then.”

Kyungsoo falls quiet, so Jongin turns to his last resort. "Hyung, I have the keys you know. I can use them if I want to."

Still nothing.

"Hyung, really. I'm not afraid to use the keys. I have them right here!" Jongin says, shaking said object in the air to emit a telling jangle. "Really. I'm just going to barge in, okay? No saying that I didn’t wa-"
 

Suddenly, the door opens, and Jongin stumbles forward. Kyungsoo glares straight at him before turning back to plop down on his bed again. The toothpaste is still matted in his eyebrows; sticking to skin like glue and refusing to let go.
 

"… Hyung, are you okay?" Jongin asks carefully, sitting down in his own bed across his roommate. Their knees touch, and Jongin feels the need to rub comforting circles on the elder's back. "Here, let me look."
 

Kyungsoo stiffens when Jongin reaches over to examine his eyebrows. “Why don’t you just laugh along with the others, too? It’s funny as hell, isn’t it?”

Jongin gives Kyungsoo’s eyebrow a hard yank, emitting a small yelp from the older. “I don’t find this funny, hyung.”

Kyungsoo sighs as he watches Jongin walk into their bathroom, wet a towel, and bring it back to him. “Jongin, I’m not going to have any more eyebrows after this.”

“I know,” Jongin says, standing between Kyungsoo’s legs and cupping his chin to bring his head up. His own eyebrows are furrowed in worry as he lightly dabs water onto the minty-green toothpaste. Kyungsoo frowns and tries to pull away, but Jongin clicks his tongue at him and continues to tend to the massacre on his forehead.

“Ow, ow, ow…,” Kyungsoo says, wincing when Jongin rubs a bit harder to get the gel off his now-burning skin.

 “Stay still, hyung,” Jongin chides, and Kyungsoo can’t do anything but comply.

When Jongin finally finishes cleaning up his forehead, Kyungsoo rubs a lazy hand over his eyebrows. It’s too smooth for comfort. “…How bad is it?”

Jongin stares at him for a good couple of seconds, a pause too long to be safe, before he replies, “It’s… uh…Want a mirror, hyung?”

Baekhyun almost loses a limb when he falls off his bed laughing as he hears the scream Kyungsoo belts out.

(ಠ,ಥ)

“There’s something in here, isn’t there?”

Kyungsoo only frowns when Baekhyun asks him the absurd question as he sets down midday snacks for the members to munch on. Of course there’s nothing strange in the Oreos. Why would there be? Shaving cream is perfectly normal.

“You eat one first,” Baekhyun says, glancing at Kyungsoo as the younger sets down a glass of orange juice and water in front of him.

Kyungsoo shrugs as he takes an Oreo and sticks it in his mouth. Baekhyun watches as he chews and swallows, even taking a sip from the milk he places in front of the plate. Jongin and Sehun are already stuffing themselves with the sweet treats as they tap away on their phones, playing a two-player game together. Baekhyun eyes his own plate but takes an Oreo anyway. He chews slowly and carefully, making sure that Kyungsoo hasn’t stuck any rocks into the white cream. The cookie is surprisingly fine, however, so Baekhyun swallows and takes another. Kyungsoo leaves for the kitchen to make something else – fried eggs by the sound of it.

Do Kyungsoo thinks he calculates things pretty well. He knows it takes Baekhyun approximately 46 seconds to finish an Oreo, and since he left six normal ones on Baekhyun’s plate minus the one he ate himself, it will be, at most, four minutes and thirty six seconds before he hears the clinging and clanging sounds Baekhyun will make. A minute and forty seconds do him justice though, because that’s when he hears the firsts of Baekhyun’s loud cussing.

“Oh my god!”

Kyungsoo thinks “yes, release the Kraken” as he adds the finishing touch to the fried egg before putting it on a plate. He doesn’t mean harm to anyone – not really. He just figures that Baekhyun deserves a little fair-and-square play for his missing eyebrows. And that’s exactly the reason why he stuffed one of Baekhyun’s Oreos with Kris’ shaving cream instead of white icing. And also why he poured in half a cup of vinegar into the orange juice. And also the reason behind the two spoonfuls of salt in the water. The milk is fine, for the most part. It just has a little bit of dish detergent left in there. Well, a lot.

“What the ,” Kyungsoo hears Baekhyun stutter, “was that?!”

Kyungsoo hears the sound of glass hitting table with a loud thud!

“, , !”

The second glass lands on the table with more force than the last, and Kyungsoo hears another string of unholy words leave Baekhyun’s mouth. He calmly wonders if it’s the vinegar or the salt that got Baekhyun as he puts the frying pan in the sink to wash.

“Do Kyungsoo, what did you put in here?!”

Kyungsoo giggles as he turns the water on to run on the sizzling pan. Baekhyun runs in with his tongue hanging out of his mouth, arms flapping in the air like a ridiculous chicken.

“Kyungsoo, what the ?!”

The water masks the sound of Baekhyun’s “, I need something, quick!”, but not the “Holy ” when he realizes the fried egg Kyungsoo strategically placed on the dining table is filled with another pocket of salt.

When Kyungsoo finishes washing the dishes, Jongin walks into the kitchen with a confused look on his face.

“Hyung, do you know what happened to Baekhyun hyung? He ran up to his room screaming.”

Kyungsoo chuckles as he wipes his hands and pats Jongin on the back. “Nothing too important - which reminds me. Jongin, do you mind adding a point to my side on the whiteboard in the living room?”

“Hyung,” Jongin sighs, “you didn’t…”

Kyungsoo shakes his head as he laughs to himself. “You know what? Never mind. I think I’ll go do it myself.”

v(ಥ ̯ ಥ)v

“Baekhyun, this is unsanitary.”

“Even better.”

Chanyeol groans as Baekhyun tucks in the packets of ketchup under the toilet seat in Jongin and Kyungsoo’s shared bathroom. “What’s the point of this again?”

Baekhyun dusts his hands like he’s done a big task and stands up to face Chanyeol. “When Kyungsoo sits down on the toilet to take a or whatever, his heavy will press down on these ketchup packs and make them explode. The tomato juice will get everywhere – yes, on his crotch too – and he will scream like the damn sissy he is.”

“… Oh,” is all Chanyeol can say. The two leave the room, and Baekhyun waits on the sofa of the living room, watching as Kyungsoo prepares lunch in the kitchen and following the petite male with his eyes like a predator.

“What are you looking at?” Sehun asks across from him, slouching as he plays on his phone alone this time. His eyes follow Baekhyun’s squinted ones, and the younger laughs. “You guys are like cats and dogs, I swear. Or maybe Tom and Jerry?”

“Which one am I? Tom, or Jerry?” Baekhyun asks, eyes still glued to Kyungsoo’s turned back.

Sehun taps away on his phone, sticking out his tongue in concentration as the 2^nd place car speeds past his own. “Tom, I think? Since Kyungsoo hyung always kind of wins even though you’re the one pulling the prank on him.”

“What?!” Baekhyun whips his head to the youngest member of EXO, who also happens to be the most straightforward (and maybe even heartless) one in the house. Kyungsoo turns from the table in the kitchen and gives Baekhyun a curious look. The older holds up his right hand and flicks the chef his elegant middle finger in response.

⊂•⊃_⊂•⊃

It takes three hours before his plan is found out. Jongin tries to use the restroom, so Baekhyun tries to stop him, which obviously tickles the younger’s suspicions. It’s not too long before the dancer has shoved his weak body away from the door frame and inspected the restroom, walking out with the hard-earned ketchup packets and ing them in Kyungsoo’s face.

“Hyung, look what Baekhyun hyung put under your toilet seat.”

Baekhyun drags his hands all over his face, silently wailing in agony. Chanyeol shakes his head from his place on the computer by the counter.

“What is that?” Kyungsoo asks, reaching for the small white packs in Jongin’s outstretched hand. Baekhyun lets out a breath because he knows. They all know what’s going to go down.

Chanyeol’s version of the story that follows is that Baekhyun ran for his dear life. Jongin’s version states that Kyungsoo didn’t have a knife in hand (no, not at all). Baekhyun’s version goes more along the lines of “the tried to ing kill me!”, and Kyungsoo’s is more like “Byun Baekhyun damn deserved it.”

┌( ಠ_ಠ)┘

One of the worst things Kyungsoo can do to Baekhyun is talking to Kim Taeyeon, he thinks.

“Hyung, Baekhyun is going to cry.”

Kyungsoo doesn’t even glance Jongin’s way as he lays back in bed, pillow tucked under his arm as he sends another Kakao Talk message to SNSD’s vocal.

“Hyung, really,” Jongin says, but Kyungsoo doesn’t really care. Even after he beat Baekhyun to a pulp for the whole ketchup packet incident, the devil had the nerve to try another toilet prank on him – one that revolved around piss running off the side of his toilet and down, down, down to the floor because yes, Baekhyun put transparent plastic wrap on his toilet: so that his urine wouldn’t drop into the bowl as guessed per-usual, but slip across the surface of ing food wrap instead. That had cost him an embarrassing “Jongin, can you please… hand me some spare clothes?” and “don’t go in to the restroom yet, I have to clean up… something”. So Kyungsoo’s not all that concerned for Baekhyun’s fanboy heart when he asks Taeyeon via instant message “Baekhyun?”

The reply comes almost instantly.

“He’s my cute baby!”

Jongin hears a light chuckle coming from the bed. Kyungsoo likes where this is going. Oh, he likes it a lot. The dancer slowly climbs into the bed with Kyungsoo and looks over his shoulder as the reply to the next text message comes.

“No, he’s still like a little brother to me.”

Kyungsoo smirks as he takes a screenshot of the conversation.

“Hyung, what are you gonna do with that…?” Jongin asks nervously, eyeing his roommate. Kyungsoo just responds with a smirk as he sends the recently taken picture to Baekhyun’s Kakao Talk.

(▰˘◡˘▰)

The next morning, a somber Baekhyun sits at the table with swollen eyes as Chanyeol pats his back, feeding him bits of egg and bacon.

“What happened to him?” Junmyeon asks, frowning at the couple.

“Baekhyun broke down yesterday,” Chanyeol explains. “Taeyeon nuna is involved.”

“What do you mean?” Junmyeon asks, setting his fork down. “Taeyeon nuna did something?”

Baekhyun gives Chanyeol a warning glare, but the giant misses it. “She said she only thought of him as a little brother.”

Kyungsoo stifles a laugh, and now it’s Baekhyun’s turn to be the center of the ten member crack-up. It’s also Baekhyun’s turn to storm off into the bedroom. Chanyeol plays Jongin’s part this time, and Junmyeon resumes his role.

“Kyungsoo,” he presses, rubbing at his temples.

The younger shrugs before wiping his tears and beckoning Jongin to change the tallies on the board. Sweet revenge doesn’t live up to its name for nothing.

◃┆◉◡◉┆▷

When practice is over that day, Baekhyun makes sure to rush to the locker rooms and raid Kyungsoo’s locker. He knows that the younger stays behind to practice extra on Tuesdays with Ryeowook, so he knows he’s safe for a good couple of hours.

When Kyungsoo finally finishes dancing and belting out notes for the day, he wipes his sweat with a towel as he strips and steps into the warm, relaxing shower. The water runs down his face and body and swallows him whole, enveloping him in a misty fog as the adrenaline in his system slowly washes down the drain. Two stalls down, he hears Jongin step into the showers, too. Usually, the younger stays behind to practice on Tuesdays in their practice room. He turns up music and makes himself one with the beats, flowing with the ups and downs of the piece lilting out of the coal-black speakers. Kyungsoo never gets to see him though, because he’s always harmonizing with Ryeowook.

As Kyungsoo finishes rinsing the shampoo out of his hair, he hears the younger hum a verse from one of the songs Jongdae sang on the radio a few days back. Like this, Jongin is always looking to improve his singing even though his position is a dancer. Kyungsoo really likes that about him: the boy is always practicing and trying his hardest for everything he does. Passion defines Jongin, really, and Kyungsoo respects that most about the younger. Today, he thinks, he should treat Jongin out to some bubble tea. It feels like a bubble tea day and Kyungsoo feels generous.

Ten minutes later, Kyungsoo’s face is tomato red as he scrambles around the locker rooms, stark , as his heart thrums and churns inside of his chest. His clothes are missing. They’re ing missing, and he’s freaking out because he can hear Jongin turning off the water in his stall. Kyungsoo thinks he’s a calm guy. He honestly knows how to keep his cool most of the time (except for when Baekhyun strikes), and he knows that he should be able to keep his cool right now, but he can’t. He can’t, he can’t, he can’t when Jongin is stepping out of the showers, and the only thing Kyungsoo has with him is a small towel that barely covers anything, and his “yeah” is literally out in the open, and really, there’s millions of other things that Kyungsoo can’t explain nor will try to in this dire situation. They’re rushing at him all at once when he sees Jongin coming from around the corner, towel wrapped around his waist and another in his hand, messily ruffling at his wet hair. Kyungsoo can’t think. He can’t think at all.

When his eyes travel down the dancer’s lithe body, Kyungsoo feels his face heat up because he feels self-conscious of his own petite build. And when their eyes finally lock, it’s like Kyungsoo is the unluckiest person in the world because he sees Jongin’s eyes fall down, down, down – smack. Destination reached. And really, if that’s not the most embarrassing thing in the world, then Kyungsoo doesn’t know what is.

“Uhm,” is what Kyungsoo thinks he hears.

“Uhm,” is what  he mutters back.

“… Aren’t you… going to get dressed?”

Kyungsoo wishes he could give Jongin an explanation, but all he does is cover his ice-cold shlong as best as he can and dart his eyes to his locker that is wide open and clearly empty. Jongin follows his gaze and frowns, then turns back to him.

Kyungsoo swears those eyes travel down one more time before Jongin coughs, scratching his head.

“Baekhyun again?”

“Hopefully?”

Kyungsoo doesn’t really know what prompts Jongin to do what he does next, but all he can do is stutter and freeze when the younger unwraps the towel from his waist and hangs it on Kyungsoo. He thinks he can hear Jongin mutter “cover yourself…” before the dancer scuffles over to his locker beside his and throws him some spare clothes.

When Kyungsoo finally changes into Jongin’s large clothes, sleeves hanging past his small fists and sweats too baggy to look nice, Jongin blinks a few times before saying, “Let’s go.”

Kyungsoo forgets all about the bubble tea and everything about everything else when Jongin shyly tugs at his loose sleeves, holding on all the way on the walk to their dorm. He really doesn’t know what’s going on.

(-’๏_๏’-)

“Baekhyun is ignoring everyone.”

Kyungsoo sighs for the hundredth time that day. Baekhyun has been giving all eleven members the cold shoulder after the day Jongin and the vocal stepped into the dorm together. No one knows what’s wrong, and they know it’s bad because Baekhyun doesn’t add a tally to his side of the board. Kyungsoo wearing Jongin’s clothes clearly means that Baekhyun has won round something-over-500, but when the brunet slams the door hard enough to make the ground tremble, they know it’s not a joke anymore.

“Kyungsoo, go talk to him.”

“Why me? What did I do?”

“I’m thinking most of everything?”

Kyungsoo groans when Jongdae gives him the I-know-you-know look, but he stays rooted to his spot on the couch. He has this thing called a man’s pride, and really, what’s wrong anyway? Did the Taeyeon prank push Baekhyun’s buttons a bit too hard?

“This is getting serious, guys. The air is always tense and uncomfortable,” Junmyeon says, frowning. “I’m going to call a meeting. Everyone meet in the conference room in thirty minutes.” He turns to Kyungsoo to finish his decree. “Bring Baekhyun out by those thirty minutes. Got it?”

Kyungsoo moans and groans and twists his body, but when the minute hand reaches the 10 on the clock indicating 9:50PM, he knows he has to do his duty. The rest of the members are already setting up the bean bags in their spacious spare room on the second floor that Junmyeon reserved for all things “that come in dozens – yes, that means us”. All problems are resolved in the conference room, and to be honest, Kyungsoo is wondering why things have escalated this quickly, and why.

“Baekhyun, open the door,” he says when he finally reaches the slick wooden door that leads straight into the chaotic cave of EXO’s light and fire (apparently light and fire do not like cleaning up rooms).

“No.” is Baekhyun’s response in the form of paper and black marker slid through the small space under the door. Kyungsoo pushes it back into the room and knocks hard on the door.

“Open up!”

He knows Baekhyun has fallen back because he hears a soft thud.

“I’m using the keys, Baekhyun. This is leader-nim’s orders.”

Kyungsoo sticks the metal numbered “2” into the lock, and hears a click! as the door unlocks. He takes a deep breath before turning the knob, unsure of what Baekhyun’s state will be and if he should bring some sort of shield to block him from a surprise attack Baekhyun might have planned. But when he cracks the door open in the slightest of slivers and sticks an eye in, he’s surprised to find that Baekhyun is crouched on the floor at the foot of his bed, the room’s lights completely turned off, and the floor strewn with balls of wadded tissue.

“Yo, I’m stepping into your room, Baek…,” Kyungsoo announces, biting the inside of his cheek. He doesn’t know why his heart is beating so fast and why he’s genuinely scared that Baekhyun might have done something stupid like crying. It’s not his problem – not when Baekhyun has been pulling his tail for years now, so he doesn’t know why he crouches down beside the older and turns his head, nervously glancing his enemy’s way and nudging him.

“Hey, you.”

Baekhyun’s head is still burrowed in his arms when Kyungsoo tries to annoy Baekhyun into talking by poking him. Baekhyun doesn’t budge, though, and Kyungsoo wonders when his tolerance has gotten so high. “Baekhyun, look, whatever I did, I’m sorry. But Junmyeon hyung is calling a meeting and we really have to go.”

The clock on the wall reads 11, which means Kyungsoo has approximately five minutes before he must carry the dramatic princess out of the room.

“Baekhyun, please. I’m sorry, okay? The cookie and egg and orange juice thing? I’m sorry. I pretended to drink the milk. And the ones before that one – the time I stuck a Mentos in your soda and made it explode, the time I bleached your favorite boxers and told you that Taeyeon nuna liked white undergarment, the time I sent her the picture of your computer wallpaper of her photo shoot for “I Got A Boy” - wait a minute. Is that why you’re mad, Baekhyun? Because of the whole Taeyeon nuna incident? Dude, I didn’t even send you a picture of the whole conversation. I asked her which of us members she missed talking to most from our trainee days. She said you, okay? She really thinks it’s sweet that you like her so much. Baekhyun, listen to me. You don’t have to be so s-“

“Do you really think this is all because of Taeyeon nuna?”

Kyungsoo blinks when Baekhyun lifts his head, glaring at him. He can’t tell if his eyes are red, but he catches a glint of light reflecting off something wet on Baekhyun’s cheek when  his head turns.

“…Isn’t it?”

“You’re so ing dumb, Kyungsoo.”

Kyungsoo doesn’t know why the words sting so much.

“You seriously think this is all about Taeyeon nuna? Really? I’m not even that serious about her, okay? I don’t know why everyone exaggerates everything because yeah, I like her, but I’m just a fan. So what, she’s set as my wallpaper? Junmyeon’s wallpaper is a group photo of all of us and does he have the hots for us all? I don’t think so.”

“But you cried when  I sent you that screenshot,” Kyungsoo replies quietly.

“… It’s not Taeyeon, okay? It’s not her. It’s someone else and you’re too dumb to see anything. Just leave, okay? Tell Junmyeon hyung to go a melon or something. I’m not in the mood to talk to anyone.”

“That’s exactly why we’re having a meeting, Baekhyun: because you won’t talk to us anymore. We need to know what the hell is wrong so that we can fix it.”

Baekhyun glares at Kyungsoo harder than before, but Kyungsoo isn’t one to back down.

“You wanna know what’s wrong?”

Kyungsoo doesn’t say anything but just stares harder.

“Tell me why my pranks never seem to do anything besides make you scream. Tell me why Jongin is always there to make you feel better, to make me look like the bad person. Tell me why you always run to ing Jongin whenever I make you feel like . Tell me why you were wearing his clothes; just tell me why it’s him! What’s so damn special about Kim Jongin?”

“… What?”

“See, you won’t get it even if I said it. So just leave, okay?”

“Baekhyun, I-“

“Shut up.”

“No, listen to me.”

“Shut up.”

“Baek-“

“ing shut up, okay?”

And then Kyungsoo really does shut up because Baekhyun’s lips are on his and it’s warm and his cheeks are extremely hot and his hands are shaking and what the hell is going on?

All Kyungsoo can process in that moment is the movement of his lips on Baekhyun’s (yes, he’s kissing back – what?) and the quiet sigh the older lets out. He doesn’t know how long they’re doing that thing, but when they break away, he can’t think anymore.

“My pranks – you know why I pull them on you?” Baekhyun asks, quiet on his lips.

Kyungsoo can’t really answer even if he wants to. He feels numb all over.

“It’s cute, okay? It’s cute when you freak the hell out and it’s cute when you get flustered.”

Baekhyun’s grasp on his arm loosens, and they both know that this is the sickest joke that has ever been told between them. Tom and Jerry are kissing. What?

“And you know, I thought you’d look like with no eyebrows, and yeah, you kind of do, but…”

Kyungsoo’s eyes are wide open when Baekhyun’s hands fidget against his own.

“I mean, you’re still kind of…”

“Kind of what?”

“… Yeah.”

Kyungsoo knows what Baekhyun means when the older runs a thumb over his forehead and leaves his gaze there.

(◡‿◡✿)

Outside, Junmyeon beckons the rest of their group to shuffle back to their other duties. “Meeting adjourned. Thank you for your cooperation,” is what he thinks he should say, but he can’t risk raising his voice lest the two vocals in the room hear him. His eyes search for Jongin because he knows the younger is conflicted with emotion, but when he finally finds the younger, he has a content look on his face.
 

“Are you okay?” he asks, sitting down next to the dancer on the sofa. He’s watching a rerun of their Music Core performances.

“About what?” Jongin asks, facing Junmyeon. When their eyes meet, though, Junmyeon knows that everything is okay because Jongin’s gaze is genuine.

“You know, Baekhyun and Kyungsoo.”

“Yeah,” he replies, and he really is. “I knew it was going to happen eventually. I’m  just glad it was sooner rather than later.”

Junmyeon pats Jongin on the back and thinks “our maknae is all grown up now”. Maybe they all are, but it’s just that they like to fool around a lot. When he stands up to leave for bed, he glances back into the living room and looks at the whiteboard one last time. He thinks he’ll miss seeing it there despite all the trouble it’s caused. In the end, there is no winner, and that’s how he knows that all the pranks are in good fun.

E N D

TO THE BIRTHDAY GURL:

OKAY SO LIKE I'M SORRY. I'M LAME. AND I TOLD YOU EVERYTHING I WRITE REACHES THAT POINT WHERE IT'S LIKE "UH, ARE YOU SURE THIS IS FULL FLUFF/COMEDY?" BECAUSE I AM A DEPRESSED LITTLE LIKE THAT.
But anyway, I hope you liked this little baeksoo fic? It was my first time stepping out of my comfort zone okey. I never wrote ze Baeksoo before ㅎ_ㅎ All for you, Jane. All for you. 'nyway, happy buffday and I hope you don't die too soon liek you're getting old so fast lady ? why, you tryna catch up to Byunbaek or someshing? 3‿3 LOL. just kidding. Well yeah, have fun being 2 years apart from Sehun. I'll just stay here... 5 years from Kyungsoo... yeah. Don't stress yourself out too much with your AP chem and math and whatever, and just sit back and relax sometimes, yeah? Get your booty off of tumblr and give your body some time to recharge xD those baekhyun gifs can wait ;)