i’d stay forever in this moment, if it means staying & holding you.. 

^ p.s it was the caption found with the pic ;^; oh so beautiful from ---> (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:・ﾟ✧

Hands Held.

A BaekYeol Fic.

Rating: Pg13- NC16 (I really dunno :x)

Mostly flufffffffffffffffffffffffffff

Inspiration Song : How to Love by Beast

***

The very first time Baekhyun and Chanyeol held hands was in elementary school. At the young tender age of 7 years old, both of them were too young to understand or bother what it meant to hold hands with another.

They only obeyed whatever their teacher was instructing: To hold hands with their assigned partner and don’t let go especially when going to assembly or the parade square lest one of them gets lost in the crowd. With hands grasped tightly together, small cubby fingers intertwined, they skipped happily in the wee hours of the morning from then on, broad teeth-filled grins on both faces.

“Yeollie! Don’t let go okay? I don’t want to get lost,” A small Baekhyun squeaked to his partner, eyes shining, as though ready to cry at any moment now.

“Yes Baekkie, I wont!” A similarly sized Chanyeol said to his partner, flashing Baekhyun a assuring smile as his small hand gripped Baekhyun’s even tighter. Only then did Baekhyun give a smile that allowed his eyes to become shaped like small little crescents.

**

The second time they held hands was after graduation.

Finally reaching the ages of 15, both Baekhyun and Chanyeol had graduated. Innocent minds were slowly growing curious when they reach adolescent ages. Both of them grew fond of each others presence, and spent large amounts of time with each other, ultimately becoming the best of friends.

Both of them settled in the confinements of Chanyeol’s room, playing a player versus player game in “Street Fighter” on his xbox.

It was a simply gesture. Chanyeol’s free left hand slithered its way to Baekhyun’s busying right hand. Soon enough, all of Baekhyun’s undivided attentions landed on the hand that held his, the video game long forgotten.

Chanyeol flashed his trade mark Cheshire smile, which seemed to spook everyone but Baekhyun. Pink blush painted his cheeks at his hand continued to savor the warm delicate hands of the older one. Those thin digits that held grace and delicacy, hands that seemed to be molded perfectly for his.  

Baekhyun only smiled at the sight in front of him, a cute adorable Chanyeol. Even Chanyeol’s dumbo-like ears had gone red! Baekhyun squealed abit on the inside as he took in the sight, infront of him. He dropped controller and linked his left with Chanyeol’s right hand. Only then were the both of them truly one. Baekhyun let his thump comforting gestures on Chanyeol’s hand, hearing satisfied sighs from Chanyeol.

Baekhyun then readjusts his own position to sit on Chanyeol’s lap, and the two spent their day, basking in each others presence, hands never leaving one another’s.

Baekhyun lying into Chanyeol, hearing his heartbeat beat in sync with his, back to chest, the slow rising and falling movement. It was all too calming, peaceful as serenity overcame his senses as he laid with Chanyeol.

**

The third time Chanyeol and Baekhyun held hands was in public, in high school to be exact.

Both grown into fine young men,

 Chanyeol had gone through puberty just fine, towering at the massive height of 186cm. His huge eyes twinkling at the mention of pranks and jokes, he was nicknamed the Reaction King. Chanyeol’s most noticeable feature was probably his ears, peering out, sticking out actually, even in the midst of his thick brown hair, styled, and fringe cut in a straight line at the front. His deep velvety voice often shocking people when they first hear him speak.

Baekhyun, though did not have such a great luck.

He didn’t have such a huge spurt in height, and maybe even a little resentment was held in his heart. It was after summer break, when Chanyeol had noticeably grown into a giant, shocking all of the female population and males that often came by to tease Chanyeol for his sudden 360 degree turn from his original small frame of 160cm.

Baekhyun only had a height of 175 cm, a miserable 10 cm difference from his best friend. Though not exactly bad looking, Baekhyun often felt himself yearning to be more like Chanyeol, more tall, more smiley, more personality, …more Chanyeol rather than himself.

What Chanyeol saw though, was way different.

Chanyeol saw a beautiful boy with cute features, a smile that never seemed to light up his day even when it was the gloomiest.

The boy that was always there when he was feeling down, there to comfort him whenever he failed a test, the boy that tutored him until he finally passed. His small frame held his larger one, whenever they embraced, holding each other tight, and enjoying each other’s comfort.

And dear god, those hands that were the definition of beauty itself. Delicate. Soft. Whenever they touch his, the gentle touches of Baekhyun’s fingers were just, just heaven itself.

 He can never imagine giving this wonderful being to anyone. And he dreads the day that he will have to do so, because he will also be giving away his heart along with Baekhyun.

So Chanyeol holds on to these pair of hands as tightly as he can, till the day Baekhyun decides he wants to let go.

***

For the very first time, Baekhyun and Chanyeol are no longer holding hands.

Ever since high school, any fool can see Baekhyun is the epitome of beauty itself. Well maybe except for himself.

Baekhyun receives love notes every single day, and Chanyeol can see that he is no longer the only admirer for Baekhyun’s face, body and  hands.

The way Baekhyun smiles, bows, laughs, or merely giggles with his hands covering his mouth, it entices the male population and has girls in all directions swooning.

Chanyeol’s heart constricts and winces whenever he takes notice of the people around him.

Baekhyun no longer belongs to only him when they began widening their social circle. Baekhyun makes friends with others, whom he names as “BFF”s, he tells Chanyeol. Standing for “best friends forever”.

One of them is Kyungsoo, whom encourages Baekhyun to meet up with one of the senders of his daily love letters. This is not to Chanyeol’s knowledge. Until a day later, Chanyeol comes to school, finding Baekhyun’s hands linked with another male, namely Kris. Those hands, now touch another. Feel another. Grace another.

Like a poison arrow shot through Chanyeol’s heart, jealousy and pain spreads through Chanyeol’s heart mind and soul. Vicious vile thoughts run through Chanyeol’s once innocent mind when he drinks in the scene infront of him.

Baekhyun and Kris being lovey-dovey, completely ignoring his presence. Not even a greeting from Baekhyun. It was like as though, Chanyeol had never existed in the first place.

Ugly thoughts that ate away Chanyeol’s heart, he chooses to walk away.

With an utterly shattered heart.

**

The fourth time Chanyeol’s hands were linked with Baekhyun again was when Baekhyun was heart-broken.

On a rainy cloudy day, Chanyeol’s door bell rang. The sounds of thunder filled the air, flashes of lighting lighted up the skies, as though chaos was raging somewhere up there.

A muffled “W-wait a minute!” was heard through the wooden door before it was opened with a “click”.

The door reveals a familiar figure, a damp, drenched Baekhyun, head hung between slumped shoulders.

“B-baekhyun?!” Chanyeol could only gasp out in surprise as he found his long lost friend in front of his door after half a year.

When Baekhyun finally lifted his blond head, Chanyeol could only note the older’s appearance in shock. Purple and black bruises littered all over his pearly white skin, visible even in the dark gloominess of the dark skies. A particularly dark patch was on his cheek, puffing out, red, and it screamed the word “pain”. Dark eye bags hung from Baekhyun’s once glittery lively eyes.

Hurriedly, Chanyeol ushered Baekhyun into his house without hesitations. Whatever past hurt the younger had felt when flying out of the window, because he only concentrated on trying to aid Baekhyun.

Cleaning up, bathing, and applying medicine on wounds, cooking a warm dinner, heating up some warm milk.

Chanyeol did everything to make sure Baekhyun was comfortable. Safe. He had no idea what in the world happened, though he had a slight idea. Though all of that had to wait.

Chanyeol vowed to himself, he’d always make sure Baekhyun was smiling. Smiling from his heart, smiling so hard and sincerely that it’d reach his eyes, forming those familiar crescents that he’d be so tempted to kiss and love.

The Baekhyun right now, lifeless, was something he would change.

With that, Chanyeol grabbed his guitar, and hummed songs to coo Baekhyun to sleep.

Chanyeol’s deep voice did wonders to Baekhyun’s ears, and heart. Baekhyun could only register the love, warm and concern as Chanyeol’s voice crept into his heart, soothing it, it with loving gestures.

A lone tear drop escaped from Baekhyun’s closed eye, as he rested in Chanyeol’s comfy bed. His lips slowly curved into a small shy smile. He didn’t need to open his eyes to know that Chanyeol was now grinning and b with happiness from just a slight small smile of his.

Oh how he missed these minimal but fulfilling moments of happiness with his Yeollie…

That night, Chanyeol tried his best to stay up and sing tunes, beaming with contentment and bliss whenever he got a response like a smile or twitch from Baekhyun.

Wearied out by tiredness, he fell asleep next to his Baekkie, in the most uncomfortable position possible of lying on the floor, head and arms propped on the bed. But his hands…his hands were where they belonged.

Fingers intertwined once more, Yeollie held Baekkie’s.

Falling asleep had never been easier.

**

The fifth time Chanyeol and Baekhyun held hands was when they made love together for the first time.

Baekhyun finally accepted his feelings and recognized what he had often seen in Chanyeol’s eyes was love, adoration and care. He would have never known if he didn’t head to Chanyeol’s house for help after the beating he had received from the abusive boyfriend. With Chanyeol’s help, he overcame his fears and traumas of falsely perceived perceptions of “love”, finally seeing it in its purest form: Chanyeol.

Baekhyun could only blame himself for his insecurities and desperation when he accepted Kris as his boyfriend. He was willing to throw himself at anyone who wanted him, and under peer pressure, he naturally accepted whoever they suggested.

He was utterly blind to the man who gave his all to him. Not even regret, guilt, or words of apology could repair the hole that had been drilled into Chanyeol’s heart when Baekhyun had deliberately ignored the boy, hurting him.

Now they were in Chanyeol’s bedroom once more. Posters of games, were now replaced with Animes, pokemon and whatever that took Chanyeol’s interest as he grew up.

Two bodies, yearning for each other so deeply. Passion burnt in their bodies, and saliva was exchanged, in love filled kisses. Butterfly kisses rained upon Baekhyun’s milky white skin, as Chanyeol mapped out his lover’s body with years of locked up love and passion.

Baekhyun, in turn ached for more of Chanyeol’s touches, kisses and warm.  Sounds of pleasure echoed through the walls, gasps, moans and whimpering of Chanyeol’s name.

When it came down to the final act, Baekhyun suddenly broke down.

“Chanyeol. W-wait. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry. I can’t give you my first..”

Hot trails of tears escaped Baekhyun’s eyes as his voice was laced with regret. Why couldn’t he have give all of his first to this brilliant man in front of him. His tears were wiped gently with the fingers of Chanyeol’s. He whispered comforting words into Baekhyun’s sensitive ear, its okay, no biggie, you can give me your all from now on.. .

Baekhyun continued sobbing slightly as they made love.

 Hands were tangled together, and Chanyeol made sure they never left each other. They were now linked in more than one way. As the friction increased, Chanyeol and Baekhyun’s reached at the same time. Both moaned out their lover’s name with all their soul, feeling the need to let each other know how much they loved each other.

The younger spooned the older’s smaller frame, back hugged and letting his hands intertwined once more with the older’s smaller, thinner, more delicate hands. He lifted them to admire how their hands seemed to fit together perfectly even after both of them had grown. He grinned again, revealing rows of shiny teeth, only to receive a childish poke in the stomach.

“Omff, why did you do that for!” Chanyeol said, pouting ever so slightly, as he took their hands and rubbing comforting circles on the sore spot.

“that’s for being so weird.” Baekhyun cracked both eyes open and turned to face Chanyeol.

He then pecked the younger on the lips.

“that’s for loving me.”

Another.

“That’s for accepting me for who I am.”

Once more.

“That’s for always being there for me.”

Again.

“That’s for always holding my hand, cheering me up, caring for me even when I ignored you.”

By the end of it, Chanyeol blushed a deep tomato red, before he tilted his lover’s head slightly to share a more passionate kiss.

The two never forgot to never let go.

**

For the very last time, the lovers held hands.

They walked down the aisle, side by side, beaming with happiness.

From then on, the two shared countless hand holding sessions, uncountable from then on.

Because they had vowed to be together, in heart, mind and soul.

Their hands rarely coming apart, because their souls were now joined as one.

~Fin~    

Sobs okay I have no idea but half way through this when I writing the chanyeol –heart break part I actually sobbed?!??!?!?! Okay wae

Anyways I don’t know why but I had this sudden urge to write fluff, and in particular. BAEKYEOL FLUFF URGH URGH

Okay I just spent like 3 hours writing OTL

Please do comment!

Don’t mind my stupid mistakes because I am too bloody lazy to beta and read through it again OTL

I’m sorrayy

BaoZi~