Kyungsoo thought he had everything and everyone figured out. He knew who was in love, he knew the mean boys from the nice ones. He knew the answer was 42. But he can't help doubting himself as everything he thought he knew starts falling apart. Maybe he didn't know anything after all...


Do Kyungsoo is a pessimistic boy who, simply put, hates most everything and everyone. Kris Wu and his terrible gang of friends, including Kim Jongin, are no exception to this. 

Everything is strange this year. Best friends are fighting. His friends are going to parties and losing their ities. He's becoming friends with the enemy. And this boy, this mysterious boy, is writing him messages...



177K words

This story is technically complete! (Though there are spin-offs.)

WARNING: Some violence. ual content, . Angst. (Minor) infidelity. Very vague mention of suicide. Bullying. Semi-abusive relationship? (Not physical, but psychological.) Actually, psychological abuse plays a reasonable role in this. Cheesiness isn't my style but I will use it mockingly sometimes. Cultural inaccuracies.

Ships mentioned and/or acted upon: Baekyeol, Xiuhan, Xiuchen, Hunhan, Taoris, Kray, ing, Suchen, Sesoo, Baeksoo, Keysoo. 

This isn't just , or just fluff, or just angst. Nor is it your typical hs!au. It's a story that has a plot and development and kind of falls all over the spectrum. It's a love story and a hate story and it's not all rainbows and butterflies, it's not all tears and pain, it's not all . It's everything. That's what love is. And I hope you'll like it.

I can't believe this (miscalc) is almost at 80K views. You guys are insane~

Comments (1752)

You must be logged in to comment
Chapter 12: My HunHan is breaking so I'm quite bitter and just try to avoid the XiuHan parts I hope I'm not missing much dkskfnemx
Sinnermonswirl #2
Chapter 42: A lot of unexpected things happened in this fic. I love how the tone and narrative was so brutally honest and cynical. There was no big confrontation between Jongin and Kris and no moment where Kris admits defeat and finally accepts Kyungsoo. Most of their friends didn't like each other and never became close. Pretty much all of them suffered from unrequited love and the realisation that relationships aren't what they expected them to be. They went through many hardships and serious traumas together yet both best friends and lovers ended up drifting apart. Basically all of them had no idea what they wanted or what they were doing so they just went with it. All of this make this fic so true to real life.
Veverka #3
Chapter 41: Well this story cost me lot of tears. But thats a good thing great job author :D. But Iam confussed. What happend to Jongdae and Junmmyeom? Did they broke up or something T^T?
Chapter 3: Aaaaaaah my feels >_< <3
Chapter 5: God I've reached Chapter 4 or IV or whatever. Honestly I don't know how people read these kinds of Fanfics. Kyungsoo, the main character isn't even likeable in my opinion or interesting in any kind of way. What's worst is that he does nothing to his tormentors. At this point I can't even feel sorry for him anymore because he allows himself to be bullied. Also he seems less mad at Jongin who helps bullies him but acts like he cares about him under the quiet. Because if he genuinely cares that just makes what he's doing all the more unforgivable. Scumbag.
His friends? Well they're completely useless. Minseok is the most loathsome out of them. At this point he knows whats happening to Kyungsoo but does nothing to Jongdae about or make any moves to protect him in the future. All he does is cry and hug Kyungsoo's oppressor. Annoying bastard. As a person who protected my friends from bullying in high school this is simply too infuriating to read. Congratulations to everybody who made it through this. You're truly strong.
Chapter 45: kaisoo feels are tingling ;_:
Lover_kaisoo #7
Chapter 40: I cried so much reading the last chapter
mochi1023 #8
Wonderful kaisoo fic !
Must read !
mochi1023 #9
Wonderful kaisoo fic !
Must read !
[deactivated] #10
Chapter 1: reading the picturelude of yours and laughing the part saying sorry to Sehun... Hehe...