NOte: This fic is written in jaejoong's pov :) more notes at the end of the story

5 years ago
I don’t belong here you thought to yourself as you saw your family chatting away happily at the dinner table .So this is what it feels like being alone even though you were surrounded by people who you knew loved you.However its just that you knew you just weren’t part of the family you could just sense it in your guts.

Everyday life would go on but you felt you weren’t moving at all.Stuck , stagnant and just not knowing what you should do.At the age of thirteen you overheard a conversation between your parents you went down to get a cup of milk when you heard whispers coming from the your parent room.

“He deserves to know He is already thirteen. I think its time to tell him”
No we can’t no no not now what if he wants to go back… I can’t loose him…he is already part of our family”

Upon hearing this you finally realised what you always thought was true but kept always pushed the thought away cause you didn’t want it to be true … you don’t know why but you felt your vision blurred as you saw your parents pain stricken face turning to face you . By that that you could feel cold beads of water dropping from your face continues unable to stop.
“oh Jae baby come here”your mother said as she pulled you into her arms wiping away the tears from your tear stained face and cradling you in her arms.You tried to form words to tell her you were alright to tell her you knew all along but the only thing that came out was squeak you couldn’t form the words as you felt a lump growing bigger in your throat and started crying like there’s no tomorrow.
That night you found out you were adopted when you were a little kid to a couple who had eight daughters. Your birth mother was a dish washer and your father was a man who deserved no respect he was a swindler a man who lived on theft and crime.That day you swore to yourself you will do everything you could to pay back the love that this family gave you and to find yourself in this world . That night you found a new purpose that made time to start moving again.

Present

You worked hard everyday from schedule to schedule.You finally reached part of your goal and was put into a group with three other boys who were as strong a fighter as you were.You realised you found a new family that you could be yourself with they were like real brothers to you. The hard work and sheer determination pulled all of you closer than ever.But then news came there was gonna be a new member.Upon hearing this you were horrified and felt a tinge of excitement deep deep inside of you.

The first time you saw him you were blown away..people said he came from America but when you saw him he looked like a Chinese star from an action movie.That was when you first saw him smile that dazzling smile of his and you stood there awestruck as he pulled you into a hug and thats when you knew that he had the most amazing smile in the world. You wanted to impress him by saying "Hello how are you?My name is Youngwoong Jaejoong" but you just forgotten all the english words that you tried so hard to learn the whole of last night. You could not do anything but return his smile with one of your own.

That's when you gotten your first roommate,the first night you spent the night getting to know each other and realised he liked everything you did and you found out his korean name was Park Yoochun and you instantly thought that park Yoochun had the most spectacular smile in the universe. 
Few weeks had past since Yoochun became part of your new family and you never left his side since that first day you saw his smile. He was like the missing puzzle piece in your life ever since he came you realised you found back true happiness.

However, you knew something wasn't right yoochun was too happy too content with everything and sometimes when you looked into his eyes you could see pain and sadness in them like he was in a pit of darkness but on the outside he was a ball of sunshine.You wanted so badly to go up to him and ask what was making him so sad and you wanted to just take all his pain away but you just told yourself maybe you were imagining it.

That was when one night when you were about to fall asleep you heard the living room door closing and you roused from your sleep, you looked to the bed beside you and realised yoochun wasn't there and his phone was left on the table .You quickly got out of bed and put on a jacket not caring to change out of your pyjamas as you left the room ,you quickly took another jacket just in case yoochun forgotten to take his and it was five degrees outside.

When you stepped out of the dorm you felt foolish you didn't know where he was and you just stood there in the cold looking for him but he was already gone.

After a few minutes of walking around aimlessly , you remembered a conversation you had with him a few night ago , he was talking about how he wanted to go to the Han river one day.That was when you decided to try your luck and just go to the river to see if he was there . As the dorm was near to the river you decided to walk there. When you reached the place you began searching for him.That was when you saw him standing beside the river a few metres ahead of you partially hidden by a row of trees . Your first reaction was to run towards him and smack him on the head hard for making you worried and afraid that something was wrong.But as you got closer and closer to him you could see his face clearer and you slowed down your steps as you felt your heart getting squeezed tightly.The look on his face was filled with so much agony and sadness and you couldn't believe that the boy with the brightest smile was now wearing the most sorrowful expression that you have ever seen before as you saw tears after tears falling from his face as his hand shook violently at his side.

You stood there with only the row of trees hiding you from him as you started to cry your own tears as you felt his pain becoming yours. That was when you couldn't take it anymore and slowly walked towards him and placed the jacket onto his shoulder as you pulled him into your arms and took hold of his shaking arm. 

At first you could feel him flinch and became very still but after a while he pulled you in tighter and began to cry openly and unabashedly as you cradled him in your arms. That was when park Yoochuns wall that he built came crushing down.That night You told him everything was gonna be alright and you were there for him no matter what.
After that night, Yoochun started to rely on you more but now instead of leaving to the Han river he would climb into bed with you and you would hold him tight chasing away all his bad dreams and keeping him safe as you sang songs lulling him to sleep.

When morning came, Yoochun would go back to being his cheerful self the facade that he puts on in front of the camera but you knew that this Yoochun who is the happiest person on earth and that Yoochun who is filled with sadness and secret is the one thing that you want to protect the most in the world.
You realised after a while that you found your first love.Your soulmate who has the most dazzling smile in the world.The one thing that remained constant in your life even after all the years of up and down and the breaking of DBSK.He was still by your side and you know you will never let him go or cry tears of sorrow again because you are a selfish person and he was your other half that you never want to loose for eternity….

Notes : Hey there ^^ i hope you guys liked the story :P this is my first ever fanfic that i have written in my life!!! so please don't judge the story took harshly:/ btw i'm sorry for the lack of punctuation and errors i made in the story it's just that i at editing:( and my english is quite bad…to be honest i wanted to write a fic for quite a long time already but did was to lazy to really start writing but anyways i'm quite happy in the end cause i finally wrote a fic on my all time fav ship soul mates~~ i mean come on they practically ship themselves hahaha:) okay that's all i will stop my ranting here..once again i hope you guys like it >.<
ps sorry for the bad ending ;(,,,,