The giraffe was small, but large enough to hug and squeeze. The plush was silky soft to the touch, and the little eyes shone. Wook loved Kiki. 

Yesung had bought the giraffe the previous month, as a gift for his younger boyfriend.

 

Wook remembered the moment he had first set eyes on the plushie. He had been alone in the dorm, waiting for the others to return as he cooked the dinner. Yesung had come running up the stairs to the dorm, his breath coming in short pants as he hugged Ryeowook close to his chest. There were tiny beads of sweat on his brow, and his chest was heaving as he tried to get his breath back to normal.

Wook had laughed. "Are you really tired just from running the stairs? I think you need to do more exercise!"

His laughter had stopped as Yesung pulled a brown paper bag from behind his back. His eyes were bright, but looked sad, as he stared at Ryeowook. He leaned in and kissed him, pressing his lips desperately against the younger boy's, the kiss was almost rough.

"Yesung, that hurt. What are you doing?"

"I love you Wook, I love you. No matter what happens, I will always love you." He kept glancing around the room as though he would never see it again whilst his hands gripped tighter onto the smaller boy's arms.

Wook's eyes opened wide. "I love you too Yesung, but please tell me what's going on. You're scaring me.."

The desperation in his boyfriend's eyes turned into a gentle loving look. "I'm sorry Wookie, I didn't mean to scare you."

 

He had held the boy tight in his arms, and Ryeowook could feel the trembles coming from the older boy. They moved to the living room, and Wook had let the boy cry on his shoulder. The shuddering was terrible, the whole sofa shaking from the sobs. Yesung was clinging to Ryeowook with a force that was almost painful, and the tears were soaking through his shirt. Wook had held Yesung tightly, wiping away the neverending tears as his boyfriend sobbed loudly, taking in deep breaths as he choked on his tears.

The boy had rushed to the bathroom, choking and coughing violently into the toilet, a thin stream of liquid passing his lips each time. The sobs continued, the small tears falling down his face. 

 

Ryeowook had sat next to him as he vomited and choked, rubbing his back gently and whispering soothing comforts.

"Now look" he had said gently, as the sobs began to slow, "You've made yourself sick." He pressed little kisses to Yesung's hair, and sat him upright. He let the older boy lean against him and hugged his boyfriend gently. "What happened Yesung, why are you crying?"

 

Yesung hadn't said anything, not for what felt like eternity. Then, slowly, he had reached his hand into his pocket and pulled out a crumpled letter. He had handed it to Wook, and as the younger boy read the printed words he felt as though he wanted to sob as well.

"This letter is to inform you of your enlistment date."

 

He had wanted nothing more than to weep in Yesung's arms, for them to sob together. But he knew that he needed to be strong. He had to look after Yesung, the boy's body couldn't take anymore crying. He looked properly at his boyfriend, at the red-rimmed eyes, the lips that had been bitten until they bled, and the way he was breathing heavily after throwing up the contents of his stomach into the toilet. And he decided to be his strength.

 

So, instead of dissolving into tears, he took Yesung's hand and pulled him back to the living room.

"Everything will be okay. Please don't cry. It's only for two years, and it says that you're doing public service. So you won't be hurt, and maybe we can see you on the radio. Don't cry Yesung, we'll still be here when you get back."

The boy had just looked at Wook, and then hugged him tightly. "Thank you" he had whispered quietly, "thank you, thank you, thank you."

Tiny tears had appeared in his eyes, and he had reached behind him for the brown paper bag he had been clutching earlier. 

He handed the bag to Wook, and wiped his eyes with the end of his sleeve. "I got you a present, so that you wouldn't be lonely."

Ryeowook had hugged Yesung, and thanked him. Still hugging tight to the older boy, he opened the bag to see soft yellow plush. 

 

As he had pulled the plushie from the bag, his eyes had lit up and he laughed in delight at the soft toy. "She's perfect."

Yesung kissed Wook gently. "What will you call her?"

"Kiki. That's a nice name for her."

"It's a perfect name. I was going to get you a turtle, but you like giraffes more. And besides, turtles are more my favourite animal than yours."

 

Wook had slept with the soft plush every night.

On the day of Yesung's enlistment, the older boy hugged the plush, and pressed a kiss to the soft material. "I've placed my love inside Kiki, that way you won't feel lonely. I'll write every day."

Wook hugged Yesung tightly, "I'll write every day too, hyung. Stay strong, it's only for two years."

 

Ryeowook insisted on helping Yesung pack his bag for the training. Helping the boy to the car, they kissed one final time.

 

Going back to the house, Ryeowook cradled Kiki tightly in his arms, pressing gentle kisses to the soft material, and feeling the love of his boyfriend. He blushed as he lay on the bed and hugged the toy close.

He wanted to cry, but he knew that Yesung would be okay. Besides, the older boy had his own little companion for the next two years.

 

When Yesung reached the army base, he opened his bag and started to unpack the contents into the locker that he was given. The first thing that he saw was a brown paper bag, right at the top of the bag that Wook had carefully packed for him. He smiled as he picked it up and took out a small turtle plush and a note.

"My dearest Yesungie. I'm so happy that you found your special turtle, because I've just lost mine. Stay strong and happy in the army, and I hope that when you hug your turtle you can think of me, and feel a little less alone. I'll be thinking of you, and Kiki will too. I love you forever jagiya, see you soon. Ryeowook xx"

 

Yesung cried as he reread the note, and he pressed a small kiss to the soft plush and to Ryeowook's name on the paper. Hugging the plush close to his chest and thinking of his lover, he felt comfort in the knowledge that Ryeowook was doing the same.