“Ughhhh, I’m so full,” Kris groans, before pausing for a minute. “After thinking about it, I’m gonna eat more.”

                Jongin chokes on his soda, half-coughing and half-laughing. “You’re so weird.”

                “And you’re in an unusually good mood. What gives?”

                “He scored a kimchi spaghetti date with Kyungsoo,” Tao explains, currently lying on his back with his legs propped upwards against the wall.

                “It’s not a date!”

                “I heard ‘date’ so I’m pretty sure it’s a date. Tao what is it exactly that you’re doing?”

                “Shut up, it helps your blood circulation.”

                “Guys, I’m serious. It’s not a date.”

                Tao puts his legs down and rolls over so that he was sitting up to face Jongin. He stares at him. “Then you have to make it a date.”

                “I—what?”

                “Make it a date. Do some cutesy romantic junk while you’re cooking with him.”

                Jongin colours. “I don’t—”

                The sound of plastic being ripped open cuts Jongin off, and everyone turns to look at Sehun, who’s just opened up a jumbo-sized box of Vector and was now sticking his hand into the bag before re-emerging with a fistful of cereal.

                “…Dude. What are you doing.”

                “You said to eat more, didn’t you? This stuff is supposed to be good for you,” Sehun says, sitting in Yixing’s chair again and rolling it over to Luhan’s desk.

                Luhan looks up from his screen and frowns at him. “Why are you always hanging around me all the time now?”

                “Because I’m bored and you’re always doing something,” Sehun says through his mouthful, shoving his hand back into the box and dropping the cornflakes everywhere.

                “Couldn’t you at least get a bowl?”

                “Anyways,” Kris says, choosing to ignore them by this point and turning back to Jongin, “you should totally feed him while you’re taste-testing the food.”

                “And you should some sauce off your finger really slowly while he’s watching,” Tao adds.

                “Or better yet, you should the sauce off of his finger really slowly.”

                “Or you could just drop the food altogether and shove him against the sink before—”

                “Guys!” Jongin interrupts, looking increasingly flustered. “That all sounds great and everything, but knowing Kyungsoo he’d probably give me that wide-eyed puppy look if I tried to pull anything and then I wouldn’t know what to do with myself after that. Besides, I’m hardly the person to pull that kind of off all smooth and suave-like, unlike certain people.”

                Cue three pairs of eyes all turning to watch Sehun as he wordlessly offers Luhan some of the cereal in his hand, and this time there’s no heavy pauses or hesitation as lips blatantly brush fingers and both turn back towards the computer monitor, munching cereal without comment.

                Jongin stares for another moment before continuing as if he hadn’t stopped to watch a freshman feeding a first-year graduate. “Not to mention that I kind of…ed up and told Kyungsoo that he had a secret admirer.”

                “Wait, you what?” Tao narrows his eyes.

                “He was asking why I was asking if he was dating Jinri or not and I told him it was because I was asking on the behalf of a secret admirer.”

                “Okay…”

                “A secret admirer who’s not me,” Jongin emphasizes.

                “I still don’t see the problem?”

                “Yeah man, if anything it’ll make a cute little surprise.” Kris wrinkles his nose. “Or a really cheesy scene out of some sappy k-drama, but hey, I don’t judge a man’s wooing techniques.”

                “Okay, clearly you guys aren’t getting the big picture. Pretend you’re Kyungsoo for a second, and I’ve just told you that you have a secret admirer who’s relying on me to keep his secret and . Do you have any idea how much of a ing douche it’s going to make me if I start hitting on him while I supposedly have a friend who’s crushing on him? If this thing becomes a date then I become the who goes after his guy’s, um, girl. But in this case it’s another guy.”

                There’s a minute silence as this sinks in with Kris and Tao. “Nah, still think it’d make for a really sappy k-drama plot twist.”

                Jongin gives up and sprawls out lifelessly in his beanbag chair. “You guys ing . And here I thought I’d actually be getting some decent advice.”

                “Hey, that is decent advice, you little . Don’t bite the hand that ing feeds you.”

                “On a different note,” Tao interrupts quickly, “what’s this about you not being all suave-like and whatnot? I thought you said you were, like, the Fresh Prince of High Park or some .”

                “The ? I never said—”

                “Sorry, that was me,” Sehun jumps in, glancing over and raising his hand.

                Kris his head. “Huh.”

                “What?” Jongin looks over.

                “Nothing. It’s just odd. For someone who was supposedly a total stud during high school you appear to be weirdly inadequate in the art of seducing someone.”

                “Yeah, well…” Jongin’s voice drops to a mumble, “I’ve never had to seduce anyone I really liked before.”

                “I’m sorry?” Tao says, leaning forward with bright eyes. “Did I hear that correctly? Did the Kim Jongin just admit to liking Do Kyungsoo?”

                “Will you keep your voice down!”

                “WHAT’S THAT?” Luhan says loudly, turning towards Jongin and grinning evilly. “DID SOMEONE SAY THAT KIM JONGIN LIKES DO KYUNG—”

                “Shut the up!” Jongin sprints across the room and shoves a hand over Luhan’s mouth within seconds.

                Sehun snickers. “How cute, his first crush.”

                “Aw, he’s so adorable,” Kris coos, reaching out to pinch Jongin’s cheek, and Jongin slaps the hand away before scowling at him.

                Minseok walks into the room then, looking triumphant. “Good news, I finally managed to settle a deal with the photography club. We’re booked for a photo shoot next Saturday.”

                “Saturday when?” Luhan asks sharply, looking over at Minseok. “I have class, remember? You know, that class I told you about? For my masters? Cause, remember, I’m taking my master’s right now—”

                “Shut the up, Luhan. It’s at two o’clock at some fancy studio downtown.”

                “Fancy? Downtown? Sounds expensive. Do we have to pay for it?” Kris asks.

                “Well…”

                “Well what?”

                “They didn’t ask for money, since all of the members have some kind of professional photography backgrounds and they said they’d let us use their studio and take our photos for free. But…”

                “BUT WHAT.”

                “They asked to take a photo of Jongin shirtless to put up on their website. You know, attract more females and . I told them it was cool.”

                “No, it is not cool!” Jongin protests.

                “No, it is definitely cool,” Kris corrects.

                “What?!”

                “One topless photo is a small sacrifice to be made for the greater good of the group,” Kris says, and gets up from his desk to walk over to Jongin and put both hands on his shoulders solemnly. “You can do it, Kim Jongin. We believe in you.”

                “…I honestly don’t know how to respond to that.”

                “Wait, it’s next Saturday?” Sehun interrupts, looking panicky. “I can’t do it then.”

                “Why the hell not?!”

                “Because I think I’ve got a mole growing under my eye.”

                Everyone stares. “A mole,” Luhan deadpans.

                “Yeah, right here,” Sehun says, pointing to the non-existent speck in the corner of his eye.

                “You sure it’s not a blackhead or something?”

                “No, it is most definitely a mole and I need to get laser surgery on it.”

                “Isn’t laser surgery to correct eyesight?” Tao asks, confused.

                “No, I’m getting it on my mole.”

                “Okay, look,” Luhan says, rubbing his eyes, “moles don’t magically appear on your face, it’s something you’re born with. Besides, I can’t see anything, so I’m pretty sure—”

                “This one does,” Sehun insists. “I’ve been watching it, it’s been getting bigger every day. You guys, what if it grows around my eye?”

                “Dude, it doesn’t grow!”

                “It does! It grows with me!”

                “Can’t you get cancer doing that?” Kris asks suddenly, frowning up at the ceiling. “Removing your mole, I mean.”

                “What?” Sehun pales. “Cancer? Are you kidding me?! I can’t get cancer! I'm too beautiful to die from cancer! There’s so much that I still haven’t—”

                A loud whistle suddenly pierced the air, and everyone flinches and turns to see Joonmyun standing in the doorway.

                “You are not going to get cancer and you do not have a mole under your eye,” Joonmyun says calmly. “We are going to that photo-shoot on Saturday. How many of you can drive?”

                Kris, Jongin and Luhan raise their hands with cowering obedience.

                “Arrange to car pool with the others. I’d suggest not eating too much before we get there. Figure out what we should wear for it. Understood?”

                Everyone nods vigorously, wide-eyed, and Joonmyun lingers another moment before turning around and disappearing as suddenly as he had come.

                “How does he do that?” Minseok breaks the silence.

                “He has a point, though. How are we going to coordinate outfits?” Jongin asks.

                “Considering that the club’s budget is nowhere as wholesome as I would’ve liked, buying twelve brand new outfits is not an option. Just buy a pair of Calvin Klein jeans or something on your own time and throw something cool overtop,” Kris replies lazily, strolling back to his seat. “Jeans are always classy. Oh, and none of you mofos better bring any nasty- shoes with you. Bring your best pair and try to match the rest of your outfit from there.”

                Sehun raises his hand. “If I come in my bare feet does that mean I’ll have to go shirtless?”

                “I said classy, not Hulk.”

—∞—

                “Hey Chanyeol,” Jongdae peers down at the espresso machine, “how do you work this thing again?”

                Chanyeol sighs. “Here, I’ll do it for you. You’ll probably mess it up anyway.”

                “I’d take that as an insult but you’re the ing barista around here so I’m not complaining.”

                Sehun slowly looks up from his textbook, gaze intense. “You guys,” he said slowly, practically burning holes into the air as he stares into space, “how do you make blood sausages?”

                Kris nearly drops his mug of coffee. “Okay, I’ve heard some pretty weird out of you but this is where I draw the line—”

                “I’m being serious! I took that anthropology course about culture and stuff and it says here that there are places where people eat blood sausage,” Sehun says, lifting his textbook up and shaking it haphazardly. “How does that even work? What if the case broke? Wouldn’t you just get blood everywhere? How do you cook that stuff? How are you supposed to eat it?”

                 Jongdae stares. “You’re Korean, aren’t you? You do realize that soondae is a type of blood sausage, right?”

                Sehun’s mouth falls open. “It is?”

                Jongin looks up from his laptop in surprise. “It is?”

                “Okay, I expected that reaction out of Jongin but not out of you.”

                “Yeah, dude. It’s not just blood. They stuff it with rice or noodles or some ,” Kris says. “Even I know that.”

                “Yeah, but my parents never call Korean food by its white name so how was I supposed to know?”

                “Ugh, I know what you mean. I hate it when people give me this weird look when I say ‘ramen’ instead of ‘instant noodles,’” Kris wrinkles his nose.

                “So are you gonna tell me we actually eat monkey brains too?” Sehun says.

                “Hey, isn’t that like that Indiana Jones movie?” Jongin pipes up.

                “Which one?”

                “The one with the crystal skull, I think. As in, that’s not what I meant,” Jongin backtracks quickly, as Baekhyun spins around in his chair to give Jongin the evil eye.

                “I’ve heard of monkey brains before, too, actually,” Chanyeol says, sitting back down in his chair after handing Jongdae his latte.

                “There’s a whole list here,” Sehun says, looking back down at his textbook. “Kangaroo tail, guinea pig, rattle snake, dolphin, pickled pig’s feet, rotten meat—”

                Baekhyun retches at the mention of the last one. “Let’s not ever go there again,” he coughs.

                “Well, someone’s eating it, obviously, if it’s listed here.”

                “I’d eat a rattlesnake,” Jongdae says contemplatively. “Sounds pretty sick to me.”

                “But what if they got the poison in it?”

                “Whatever, I’ve eaten that puffer fish stuff with the poison on it,” Jongdae waves his hand dismissively.

                “Shouldn’t you technically be dead?” Chanyeol frowns.

                “No, they only put enough so you can taste it, not enough to kill you.”

                “That actually sounds like a decent job,” Kris says, looking off into the distance. “Serving poisoned puffer fish, I mean. You can give extra to the y customers and just outright do someone in if you hate them.”

                “CSI can trace that, you’d go to jail for outright doing someone in.”

                “Okay, honestly speaking,” Sehun interrupts, “how accurate are the deaths on CSI? As in the TV show?”

                “None of them,” Jongdae replies automatically.

                “Have you ever seen the show?” Sehun looks skeptical.

                “Yes.”

                “So what about that one time when they found that woman impaled by a bicycle and—”

                “Not accurate.”

                “Or that one guy with the eyeball—”

                “Nope.”

                “What about when—”

                “Most definitely not.”

                “You’re not even listening!” Sehun whines.

                “Trust me, dude, I can definitely vouch for every single death on that show being inaccurate.”

                “I remember watching that show,” Baekhyun says, sighing in fond remembrance. “I only ever wanted to watch the New York version cause the regular Las Vegas one was too dark and the Miami version was too yellow. It like, killed my eyes.”

                “Not to mention it was the only version where the cast was actually good looking. I had the biggest man-crush on Flack,” Chanyeol says dreamily.

                “Honestly, I think everyone got hooked on that show at one point or another. Until they saw their first episode of Criminal Minds and realized how soft CSI is,” Kris snickers.

                “Criminal Minds is real hard , yo. The episodes still freak me out.”

                “Actually,” Sehun looks up, eyes wide, “how accurate—”

                “Not accurate.”

                “Awwww.”

                “What do you mean awww?”

—∞—

                “,” Luhan says suddenly, leaning away from his computer screen and blinking rapidly. “ .”

                Minseok looks up from his textbook and eyes him warily. “You gonna tell us what’s up or…?”

                “Ah, !” Luhan swears loudly, reaching up with one hand as if he was going to rub his eye, but it stops and hovers and inch from his face. “I lost my contact in my eye!”

                “Oh my god!” Chanyeol shudders violently in his seat. “Dude, don’t say things like that, it’s freaking me out!”

                “I can’t help it! , I can’t find it!” Luhan spins in his chair to face the others, the left side of his face contorted and twitching. “Someone help me find it!”

                “No way man, I am not looking for that,” Chanyeol shakes his head. “If I see it stuck halfway to the back of your eyeball I’ll seriously throw up in your face.”

                “Ugh, why are people so freaked out by contacts for?!”

                “Because there’s something sitting on your eyeballs,” Chanyeol stresses.

                “Fine, whatever, Minseok, hurry up and—”

                “Actually after hearing Chanyeol say that I’m not sure if I want to look for it either,” Minseok replies, staring at Luhan as if he had a rock protruding from his face. “Sorry dude.”

                Luhan lets out a long stream of swears.

                “Hey guys,” Jongin says as he enters the room, with Kyungsoo following from behind. “What’s going—”

                “, Jongin, come here, hurry up and help me find my contact.”

                “Where did you lose it?”

                “In my eye.”

                Jongin abruptly pales and looks as if he’s going to be sick. “No way. Not in a million years,” he says, backing away slowly.

                “FUUUUUU—”

                “Hang on, sit still and I’ll find it for you,” Kyungsoo says, setting his bag down and approaching Luhan.

                “Thank you, Kyungsoo, it’s good to know that I still have some real friends around here—”

                “Give me a break, contacts freak me out, okay?” Minseok snaps.

                “Your left eye, right?” Kyungsoo asks, leaning forward to inspect Luhan’s now red and tearing eye closer, and Jongin stops because Kyungsoo is now standing with his face really close to Luhan’s.

                “Yes, please hurry oh my god it hurts so much—”

                “Hold on, I can’t really see anything,” Kyungsoo says, cupping Luhan’s chin and tilting his face upwards towards the light, inadvertently lining their lips up.

                “What are you doing.” The words fall out of Jongin’s mouth seconds before he realizes that they were his own.

                “Anything?” Luhan presses.

                “I can’t really tell. You’re tearing up a lot,” Kyungsoo says, and he lifts the hand that isn’t still grasping onto Luhan’s chin and carefully wipes away the tears that are now spilling out of Luhan’s eye.

                Jongin bristles. “I’ll look for it,” he says, a little too loudly, and he walks over briskly before turning Luhan in his chair so that he wasn’t facing Kyungsoo anymore.

                Kyungsoo straightens up and looks over in surprise as Luhan blinks, “Wait, what, I thought you just said—”

                “I changed my mind, now shut up and sit still so I can find it,” Jongin says, bending over with both of his hands still on the back of Luhan’s chair, effectively trapping him in place.

                “Ughhhh, , hurry up—”

                “I’m trying.” Jongin bites his lip. “If it really did disappear behind your eye I’m leaving, though.”

                “, come on, you can’t even see like one side of it? Cause I can shift it back in place from there,” Luhan begs.

                “Please stop talking about your contact, it’s making me sick.”

                “I’ll stop talking once you find it!”

                Just then Sehun walked into the room, and upon entering the doorway the first thing he sees is Luhan, sitting in his chair with the back of it pressed up against his desk, and Jongin, leaning over him with both of his hands on either side of Luhan’s head as they were what dangerously looked like staring deep into each other’s eyes with their faces inches away from each other.

                “What’s going on here?” Sehun asks, and there’s an unintentionally hard edge to his voice.

                Kyungsoo looks up, “Luhan lost his contact somewhere in his eye so Jongin—”

                “Can leave now,” Sehun finishes, walking over to Luhan in two long strides. “Shove over, I’ll find it.”

                “Wait, what the hell is going on here? None of you wanted to get within three feet of me and now all of the sudden you’re fighting over who gets to find it?” Luhan cries out in exasperation. “What the is going—?”

                “Shhhh.” Sehun reaches out and gently grasps Luhan’s head with one hand to keep him still so he can use his thumb to pull on Luhan’s lower lid, effectively shutting him up. He inspects Luhan’s eye for a moment before letting go and lifting up his eyelid instead, and purses his lips.

“It’s way up underneath your eyelid,” Sehun announces.

                “Thank God,” Luhan nearly sobs in gratitude. “Just, can you just hold my eyelid there, I’m gonna try and bring it down—”

                “UGHHHH, GROSS!” Chanyeol yells, wincing and looking away as Luhan reaches up and starts probing the soft jelly of his eyeball in an attempt to slide the contact back in place. “STOP IT, STOP IT, I’M GONNA THROW UP!”

                “THEN DON’T LOOK, YOU GIGANTIC ING MARSHMELLOW!” 

A/N

Someone mentioned that the club had yet to do anything club related so this chapter kind of hints that they are going to eventually do something club-related lol

For those who are confused High Park is the general area where both Jongin's house and his high school are hence "The Fresh Prince of High Park" but you know I've only seen like a handful of episodes so I have no idea what that title really implies tbqh

ALSO CAN WE TALK ABOUT THIS FOR ONE ING SECOND PLEASE

SO REAL

SO ING REAL

SOMEONE HOLD ME I AM GOING TO START CRYING ALL OVER AGAIN JESUS

THANK YOU ALL FOR SUBBING I HAVE OFFICIALLY REACHED 200 SUBS AND THIS IS A MAJOR ACCOMPLISHMENT IN MY BOOK BECAUSE I CANT WRITE FOR BUT APPARENTLY YOU ALL THINK OTHERWISE SO THANK YOU SO SO MUCH

IF I COULD I'D PERSONALLY HUG EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU AND INVITE YOU TO A SLEEPOVER WHERE WE CAN EAT LATE NIGHT RAMYUN AND CRY OVER EXO'S HOWLING NOISES TOGETHER