“OH NOT AGAIN!”
You almost jump in surprise when you hear Baekhyun screaming to the TV screen.
“What, did Kwangsoo mess up again this time?” you ask, secretly smiling to yourself because the fact that Baekhyun gets all frustrated just by watching the latest episode of Running Man is cute. Well, cute until he gets to the part where he starts cursing like a trucker then it’s not cute anymore.
“He always messes things up!” Baekhyun grumbles again. “The dude was just right there! He should’ve seen him!”
You throw a simple laugh as you grab a bucket of popcorn from the microwave and walk back to the living room. Baekhyun is already there, lounging on the couch with his feet on the table. If your mother were still alive, she would’ve cried from seeing you marrying someone with no manners like this.
“Feet off the table, Baekgu,” you scold him, emphasizing your words by flicking his temple before you plop down next to him. He doesn’t move to follow your order, but you can only sigh at the sight because since when does he ever do as you say?
“You know what?” Baekhyun says, stealing some of your popcorn without even trying to be sneaky about it. He already ate a bowl of his own, and yet he’s still searching for more. “If I were one of those guests, I would’ve ripped Jongkook’s name tag before he could even spell my name. And I’d be the winner of course.”
“I doubt it,” you simply reply, moving your bowl of popcorn away until it’s out of his reach. “I mean you get scared so easily.”
“I do not,” he retorts, glancing away from the TV screen for a few seconds just to glare at you. You make a face at his sassiness.
“I don’t know, Baek~” You end your line with a casual shrug. “Because it definitely wasn’t me who screamed like a when a cockroach flew above our heads.”
Baekhyun goes flustered. “It was flying above our heads!” He yells, swinging his hands in motions. “What do you expect me to do? Chase it around with a smile on my face?”
“You could’ve gotten something to kill it off, you know,” you offer him, throwing some popcorns to your mouth. “Or you could’ve just be all manly about it and kill it with your hands.”
“And you should eat with your mouth close and stop spitting on my face,” he grumbles, wiping his cheek dramatically and you only roll your eyes in return. “But seriously, Sweetheart. You don’t expect me to kill it with my hands, do you? I mean, who do you think I am, Jackie Chan?” Baekhyun pinches your cheek when you playfully stick out your tongue at him. “Those bastards are some scary- bugs, I swear to God. Ugh, I feel itchy all over now.”
You’re not really paying attention to what he’s saying next or what Kang Gary is trying to do on screen because there’s been something bugging the hell out of you since that last week before Christmas.
See, your relationship with Baekhyun has been a little complicated for the past few months—or almost for like a half of year, to be exact. It’s going back to the part where there’s this big obstacle in your relationship that has to be removed, but the thing is, none of you seem to able to see what’s the core of the problem. Sometimes, the two of you could spend the days giggling and dancing around the kitchen to a country music being played on the radio. But on the other times, Baekhyun could make you feel so vexed about everything that you two ended up screaming at each other.
“Get the hell out of here, Baek, I don’t want to see your face!”
”Why do I have to leave? Why don’t you leave? This is my apartment too, you know!”
”Are you honestly telling a girl to spend her time alone outside at two freaking am in the morning?”
”What ‘girl’? I’ve been talking to a ing nonsensical all day long over something that’s not even important—”
The fights contain various problems. Sometimes, you’re fighting about the fact that Baekhyun forgot to close the toilet seat again. And then there’s this time where he got so angry with you because you forgot about his birthday. Well, okay, that was purely your fault. But see, you had a reason why you forgot about it. One of your students broke her leg when she was dancing and you felt responsible for her as her teacher. You were too caught up in your own thoughts that you forgot about your husband’s birthday. All you wanted was him to be more understanding with this, but no, Baekhyun was being too childish about the whole thing.
The funny thing was, Baekhyun didn’t seem like he was angry about you forgetting his birthday. You clearly remembered what he said:
“Why do you do this?” Baekhyun complained, throwing his hand in the air out of frustration. “All you could talk about is ‘oh hey, Baek, my student is so cute, she asks me to sing for her today’ or ‘oh hey, Baek, there’s this little girl in my class who likes to pretend that I’m her sister because she thinks I’m cool!’ or—”
You were annoyed at the sound of him trying to imitate the sound of little children, so you cut his line short. “What’s your point, Baek?”
“My point is, today is my birthday,” he said, emphasizing his words, “and yet you forgot about it and still talked about one of your bratty students—”
“They’re not bratty!”
“All you can talk about now is kids and kids and kids and I’m sick of it!” He started yelling and you were afraid the neighbors would hear. “It’s my birthday, can we please talk about us instead of other people?” His voice softened when he cupped your face in his hands and gazed deep into your eyes. “Sweetheart, I miss you. I really, really do miss you. We rarely talk about us. Am I not the first thing in your mind anymore?”
That fight ended rather well because you thought he was being sweet—which he was, definitely—so you genuinely apologized to him and did some ‘special services’ to make it up to him, but you didn’t quite notice what was the real problem. You seem to get the hang of it now, though. Perhaps you always have known, but you didn’t want to believe it at first. Because believing it would make it true and you don’t want to make it true.
Baekhyun doesn’t want to have a child with you.
You didn’t think your random wish you said to him last Christmas would turn into such a big problem. When you told him you wanted to have a baby, he had looked so calm and even joked around about it. And so when he told you that he didn’t want to have a baby yet (because he wanted to spend more quality time with you and you only), you thought that oh, maybe he’d change his mind soon. But three months have passed after that, and things are getting a little bit weird.
Let’s go back to one month ago for example.
“You’re still taking your birth control pills, right?” Baekhyun asked between kisses and you were too busy thinking about the things he was about to do to you to pay a mind about his question.
You laid yourself on the bed, pulling Baekhyun down by circling your arms around his neck. You kissed him again, lightly against his mouth and he responded your kiss with the same passion, if not more. But before you could take things up a notch, Baekhyun already broke away from you again.
“Hey, answer me,” he said, voice breathless and needy. His forehead has become a little sweaty and his bare chest was heaving up and down.
“Whaaaat?” you whined, already a little bit frustrated because he kept on stopping when things were just getting so good.
“Did you take the pills today?” Baekhyun repeated impatiently. He groaned in discomfort when your knee brushed his hard-on.
“Who cares?” you replied, pulling him back for a kiss and moved your hips against his.
“No—stop, wait a second!” Baekhyun took both of your hands in his and pinned them to the bed. “Did you or did you not take them?”
“God, you’re so frustrating!” You complained loudly, wanting to bash his head with a hammer. “Baek, can’t you just shut up and do this—”
“Look, I’ll you in any way that you want as soon as you tell me—ah!” He deliberately moaned again when you pressed your hips to his in a lewd manner. “Will you stop that?!”
“Ugh, fine!” You muttered, rolling your eyes and finally answered what he’d been asking. “No, I didn’t take the pills. I’ve stopped taking them for a week by now. Happy?”
Then Baekhyun just scrambled away from you, climbing down the bed and hurriedly ran to the bathroom. You were about to ask what the hell was he planning to do when he came out again with a in his hand.
Baekhyun gnawed at the end of the square wrapping and tore it off with his teeth. When he put the on, he threw a smirk at you and said, “So, what position did you want me to you in again?”
It started out as a simple suspicion. But after more days go by, you realize that your worst scenario has come true.
“, I didn’t bring any with me,” Baekhyun said and groaned when the back of his skull hit the bathroom’s door. “Why did you have to stop taking those pills? You’re making it harder for both of us, Sweetheart.”
“Sssh!” You hissed back at him. “Don’t be so loud. We don’t want Chanyeol to throw us out of his bar, do we? Let’s just get this over with.”
“Ha, I love it when you’re being so eager,” he snickered and kissed you roughly on the mouth again. “But we still don’t have a and—”
“Then just do it without!”
“Stop rubbing yourself on me, I’m still talking!” He protested and you shushed him down with your teeth nibbling at his bottom lip. You were almost sure that Baekhyun was about to give in and do as you said, but then he shoved you away and pulled up his pants.
“Sorry, I can’t do this,” he said and then he just took off, leaving you wide eyed and ually frustrated in one of the bathroom’s stalls.
Oh, and of course, there is also that incident where Baekhyun “accidentally” threw away your Pregnancy For Dummies book.
“BAEKHYUN!” You screamed as you made your way out of the bedroom, looking for your dumb husband. You saw Baekhyun choking on his coke and spilled the drink all over his shirt before the rest of it fell coating the couch where he was seated.
“What?!” He yelled, mumbling dirty words under his breath as he tried to dry his shirt and the rest of the couch with some layers of tissues. “You surprised the hell out of me, Sweetheart. Look, our couch is now—”
You didn’t spend any second to waste. “Did you or did you not throw away my pregnancy book?”
Baekhyun’s posture stiffened a little and he slowly gazed back to you, only to receive another horrifying glare in return. “Pregnancy book? What pregnancy book?” Baekhyun said, masking his lie with a laugh. “I don’t know any pregnan—”
“This one, you !” You shouted, shoving the book directly against his face and Baekhyun fumbled a little.
“Oh…” He said, taking the book in hand and gazed at the cover. “So, like… This is yours?”
You rolled your eyes, not being subtle about it. “Unless you bought another copy of that book because you liked reading about women being fat and ugly, then yes, Byun Baekhyun, I believe that’s mine.” You shot another glare at him and he looked away with a gulp.
“Well, oops?” he tried, grinning awkwardly. “I thought it was someone else’s, so I—”
“Enough with your crap,” you snapped and he sighed, finally admitting his fault. “Why did you throw it away, Baek?”
“I didn’t throw it away, Sweetheart,” Baekhyun said, smiling as he tried to reach out and pull you into a hug.
You ducked away from his arms. “Oh, so like what, did it get magically transferred into the trashcan? Is that what you’re trying to say?”
Baekhyun exhaled heavily in defeat. “Fine, you know what? Yes, I did throw it away. But just because I feel like we don’t need it.”
You stared at him incredulously. “Did it not pass your mind that maybe, just maybe, I bought the damn book just because I actually NEED it?”
Baekhyun only sighed again and ignored you, resorting back to his previous work: cleaning the couch before it got all sticky from the coke.
“Don’t you just sigh and ignore me!” You said, pulling him by the wrist and force him to look at you.
“I’m not in the mood to talk,” he said, snatching his arm back. He didn’t even spare a glance at you anymore after that.
“God, you’re so frustrating!” you exclaimed, turning on your heels with cheeks red with anger. “I can’t believe I’m staying with you!”
Before you closed your bedroom’s door with a slam, you could faintly hear his retort, “You should’ve thought that before you said ‘I do’, Sweetheart~”
Baekhyun’s high-pitched scream wakes you up from your thoughts and somehow you’ve become so annoyed over everything. Baekhyun really doesn’t want to get you pregnant now, does he?
“Baekhyun,” you call his name as he leans back to the couch and lays his head lazily on your shoulder.
“Hmm?” He hums, almost purring to be exact. “Man, this episode’s kind of .”
“Baek,” you start again, regaining his attention. “Are we, like… Are we okay?”
Baekhyun doesn’t sit up and look at you properly, but you can tell how his body goes stiff just for a second too short for you to be really sure about it. “Of course, we’re okay, Sweetheart. Why wouldn’t we be okay?”
But the way he says the line feels weird and it leaves uneasy feelings swirling in the pit of your stomach.
Well, there’s only one way to make sure whether he’s telling the truth or not.
You shove your popcorn away from the couch before you shift your legs and straddle your husband by sitting on his lap. You wet your lower lip and throw your hair back before you settle down in a comfortable position and start meeting his lips with yours.
“Mmm—wait—” Baekhyun says, interrupting the kiss by pushing you away. “Come on, Sweetheart, I’m watching TV here.”
You don’t give up. Instead, you press your body closer to his and start nibbling on the soft skin under his ear. “When does that ever stop you?” you whisper seductively and you smirk when you feel Baekhyun shivering under your touch.
But not a few seconds later, Baekhyun is pushing you away again. “Can’t we do this later?”
You feel that familiar pain in your chest for being rejected for about the fifth time by now. So after another shallow attempt of him breaking off your kiss, you pull back and stare at him with anger in your eyes. “Baekhyun, you’re being absolutely ridiculous.”
Your husband wipes his thumb along his lower lip, hissing a bit when it hurts because you just not-so-accidently bit him there. “I’m being ridiculous?” Baekhyun asks, raising one of his eyebrows. “I wasn’t the one who suddenly tried to have with my partner when Running Man was playing.”
You almost want to punch him right there, but you think the better of it. You climb off his lap and turn the TV off.
“Baek, I want you to be honest with me,” you demand, standing in front of him with your arms folded on your chest. “Is there a particular reason why you keep trying to avoid having with me?”
There’s a glint in his eyes, which gives out a signal that Baekhyun knows exactly what you’re trying to ask him. But then he laughs and pretends that you just said something random and hilarious.
“What are you talking about?” he asks. “I’m not avoiding anything. I’m just saying that Running Man is on TV and I want to watch it first—”
“I thought we agreed on not telling lies to each other, Baek.” You scowl at him and he sighs in return. “You’re not only pushing me away now. You’ve been doing it for the last three weeks!”
“Well, sorry for not being a -deprived !” Baekhyun retorts and you judge him with your eyes because who is he kidding? Baekhyun is nothing but a -deprived —everybody knows it.
“Baekhyun,” you call again, trying to be patient but he’s really making it hard for you. “Can you please just be honest with me?”
“The truth is I’m tired,” he says and you only stare coldly at him until he gives up. “Fine, okay!” He mutters harshly. “I don’t want to have with you because I know you’ve been trying to get pregnant.”
“I knew it!” You say, scowling at him as you throw your hands in the air. “I knew you’ve been avoiding me because of this. Baekhyun, this can’t be going on forever!”
“Why do you want to have kids so badly anyway?” he snaps, standing up from the couch.
You scoff and place your hands on your hips, showing him that you’re not intimidated by his presence. “Why do you keep insisting that you don’t want to?”
“Because of so many obvious reasons!” He starts counting on his fingers impatiently. “First, we’re not financially ready. Second, we don’t know anything about raising a baby. Third—”
You imitate the movement of his mouth by your hand, mocking him by saying “Blah blah blah! Yeah I get it, we’ve been there.”
“Don’t cut me off,” he says, lowering his voice dangerously. “I don’t like being cut off when I talk.”
“And I don’t like being told the same thing over and over again,” you retort back, putting on a sarcastic smile on your face. “I’m so glad we got this all sorted out, Mr. Byun. Is there anything else I should know about your fantastic personality?”
“Don’t you get sarcastic with me,” he snaps again and you roll your eyes. “Hey, you can roll your eyes all you want, Sweetheart. But I’m not changing my mind on this. We. Are. Not. Ready.”
“Jesus Christ, Baek!” You want to rip your hair out of your head. “Is this the reason why you were acting like such a after we went to that kids clothing store last week?”
“Of course I was angry because of that!” He starts gritting his teeth unconsciously. “Look, when you told me that we were going shopping, I didn’t think I’d spend my day walking to every shop in town, looking at children’s ugly dresses and hideous socks that probably weren’t even bigger than my palm!”
You gasp loudly and point at his face. “Those socks were cute and you’re the only one who thinks like that. What, Baek, did you think I was taking you to a lingerie store, or something?”
“No,” he quickly states, but he doesn’t say anything back to correct the sentence.
“God, Baekhyun, I love you. I love you okay, but this has got to stop.” You feel so tired in your mind that you want all of this to be over already. “Listen to me, we’re—”
“No, you listen to me,” he swiftly cuts through your words. “All you can talk about for God knows how long, is about how you want to have kids, how tiny and adorable they are, and how you want to learn how to drive a van so you can take our kids to their soccer practices. I have had enough with all of your s and—”
“Oh!” You gasp loudly and you can hypothetically imagine smokes are coming out of your ears because of how angry you are right now. “How dare you—”
“Sweetheart, I care about you,” Baekhyun says, and though his voice softens, his eyes are just as cold and stubborn. “And I want to know you, I want to talk about you and learn more about how you feel, but you don’t even give me the chance to do it.”
“Baek,” you say, lowering your voice too but the rage is twice in it. “How can you say that you care about me when you don’t even want to listen to what I want?”
His eyes grow harder. “Have you ever thought about what I want, then?” he asks and your throat goes dry. “Have you ever tried to listen to me and stop deluding yourself with your own imagination?”
“Oh God,” you mutter, suddenly feeling like you’re on the verge of breaking apart and you rub your temple with your fingers to ease the stress though you know it won’t work. “Baekhyun, I can’t know what you want because even when I try to listen, you always try to avoid the topic. Just like what we’re doing right now. I’m trying to know why you don’t want to have kids with me and you keep giving me vague answers.”
He doesn’t give any word back to you after that. The tension between you is as cold as ice, and you’re not sure you can melt it with the heat from your words.
Slowly, Baekhyun breaks away from your gaze, walks back to the couch and starts reaching out for the remote TV.
“No!” You jump forward and grab it before he can get the remote in his hands. “We still need to talk.”
“There’s nothing else to be discussed,” Baekhyun coldly replies. “Now, give me back the remote.”
You’re so annoyed with his cowardly behavior that you’re about to throw that remote straight to his face, but thank God, you manage to restrain yourself and just say, “Can’t we please be mature about this and have a civil conversation with each other?”
Baekhyun clenches his jaw, replying, “Not when you’re behaving like kids.”
“I’m behaving like kids?” You repeat, looking at him incredulously. “I’m behaving—You’re unbelievable. You’re ing unbelievable, Baek. You’re so stubborn and selfish and—”
“Are you even listening to yourself? I can throw all those words right back at you!” Baekhyun exclaims, nose flaring as he scowls impatiently. “Why can’t you just understand that we’re not ready for this yet?”
You don’t know exactly on what point did you two start screaming again, but now you’re doing it. “Just when are we going to be ready, Baek? Huh?! You’re not telling me you’re gonna keep this up forever, are you?!”
Baekhyun’s jaw clenches hard as he tries to hold back his anger. “This conversation is over,” he firmly states, walking away to put the popcorn bowl back to the kitchen.
“This conversation is not—” You exhale hard, almost like gasping really, when he strolls away from your sight. “Baek, get your back here and talk to me!”
Baekhyun continues ignoring you and it doesn’t take long until you’re bursting with anger and filled with intention to hurt his feelings. “Yeah, of course, that’s so typical of you,” you shout, voice sharp and wounding. “Running away from your problems like this. Just like the old days!”
“I’M NOT RUNNING AWAY!” Baekhyun screams, throwing the bowl to the sink and you flinch when you hear the sound of the glass cracking from meeting the surface too hard.
Silence comes after that but the tension between you two feels louder than a scream.
You can see how Baekhyun’s chest is heaving up and down, heavy with anger and you don’t want to press your luck on it. You really didn’t want to fight but you couldn’t help to get emotional about all of this. And now after you notice how there’s panic in Baekhyun’s eyes—even though it’s not as much as the fury he feels inside his chest—anxiety starts to emerge in your heart as well. Just how long will he keep this up?
“Are we…” Your voice starts to break and you just wish you don’t have tears in your eyes right now, but his previous scream makes you do otherwise. You’re actually scared of him. When you continue speaking, the rest of your words have become so quiet, just like a train of whisper. “Are we never going to have a baby together?”
You don’t think Baekhyun could hear your line, but it turns out that he does, because he breaks his eyes away from yours and deeply sighs, “We’re done talking about this.”
You sharply inhale, biting your trembling lip to keep you away from sobbing. You don’t want to let him see your tears. You don’t want to appear so weak in front of him. You turn your back on him, wiping the wet, angry tears away from your eyes before they fall down to your cheeks.
“Fine,” you say, voice withering with tremble but you keep on strolling straight to the living room and grab back the remote before you turn the TV back on. “You want to watch the TV? Then go watch it!” You slam the remote down the table, not actually paying a concern about the risk of it breaking because you’re too busy trying to will the tears away. You start walking toward your bedroom, stating, “I’m done with you.”
“Hey, come on.” Baekhyun groans loudly, throwing his hands in the air before he races to chase you down. “Where are you going?” He takes a grab of your wrist and turns your body around. “Hey, look at me when I—”
“Let me go,” you say, finally facing him once again with a vicious glare, but Baekhyun can only see sadness and wounded feelings in your eyes.
His brown orbs start to waver, softening a little. “You’re crying…” it’s more like a question than a statement—a question directed to himself and you remember how much he hates seeing you cry.
He steps closer, unconsciously reaching out a hand to touch your face and brush your tears away. You slap his hand before he can even get an inch closer.
“Stop pretending like you care about me,” you utter harshly.
Baekhyun sighs and he actually looks tired, not just physically, but also mentally. “Sweetheart, come on. This is not about me not caring about what you want.”
“You’re right,” you say, “This is about how selfish and cowardly you are for not even giving me the chance to talk about it.”
“Cowardly?” He repeats, your word starting to sink down to his chest, creating another surge of resentment and impulsiveness. “I’m not a coward! I’ve told you the reasons why I don’t want this but you just don’t listen to me—”
“You’re lying!” The screaming has started again, and this time, you even get physical by shoving him away by the chest. “You’re not telling me the whole truth, Baekhyun! I know there’s something you’re hiding!”
“I’m NOT hiding anything!” His tone is even harsher and louder. “For God’s sake! Are you going to be such a about this all the ing time and not—”
His words end not with another scream from your mouth but a slap on his face.
Baekhyun’s unblinking eyes stand in shock and for a moment there, there’s no fury in them.
You surprised yourself that you even let your hand move to actually hurt him like that, so you take a step back with a gasp. “B-Baekhyun—I’m sorry—”
When he hears your voice back, the anger returns and he tightens his jaw. “Fine,” he says, letting your other hand go and moves away from you with dead silence in his steps.
“Wait—Baek!” You call, almost stuttering in the process. You see him grabbing his dark coat from the clothes’ rack before he proceeds walking to the front door. “Baekhyun, please—I’m sorry, I didn’t mean—”
You get answered by the sound of him slamming the door so hard, it makes your ears ring.
“Oh God,” you sob heavily, pain unraveling in your chest. As you lay your back against the wall, you start crying so hard; it takes a big effort for you to even breathe properly. “Oh what have I done?” You try calling him with your phone, only to be directed to voicemail, no matter how many times you try. “Baekhyun, I’m sorry,” you murmur to your phone. Your voice sounds almost unclear from how hard you’re weeping right now. “I’m sorry. Please come home. Baekhyun, please.”
He never calls back.
“B-Baek?” Chanyeol yelps when he sees Baekhyun standing in front of his door at this late hour, not to mention raining hard outside. The tall man is already wearing his pajama pants, and a loose, comfortable sweater hugging his upper body. He also has a little bit of toothpaste on the corner of his mouth so Baekhyun thinks that he may be interrupting him for popping out of nowhere like this.
“Hey, Yeol,” Baekhyun says, looking up at him with weary eyes. “Can I stay at your place tonight?”
“Uuh… Sure.” Chanyeol looks bewildered and lost for a moment, so he just kind of lets Baekhyun in since he can’t stand seeing his best friend like this. He knows Baekhyun fights a lot with his wife and it’s not really like a rare thing for him to call Chanyeol in the middle of the night—or sometimes like 3 a.m in the morning—to ask for his help, but Baekhyun has never actually asked for a permission to stay at his place before. Baekhyun usually just asked him to go somewhere to talk and ended up drinking till morning in some local bar with low price beers. Chanyeol gets lonely easily and because his wife isn’t home for most of the times, it’s always great to have companies, which is why he often said yes to Baekhyun’s sudden invitations.
That so called company is now a fuming midget with sad slanty eyes and hair wet from the rain. Chanyeol realizes that this fight is probably a lot bigger than any other fights he ever had, so he just couldn’t say anything but, “Please, come in.” to the other man. Chanyeol just hopes his carpet wouldn’t get dirty from the mud Baekhyun’s collected under his boots.
“Thanks,” Baekhyun sighs, moving past him and walks deeper into his apartment. “I’m sorry for showing up here this suddenly, Yeol. I know it’s Saturday night and your wife must be home and—”
Baekhyun gets interrupted with the sound of Chanyeol’s sudden gasp. When he glances over to look at the giant, he frowns because Chanyeol somehow stares at him in horror.
“What’s wrong?” Baekhyun asks, frowning.
“No—nothing,” Chanyeol says, immediately shaking his head again and again to prove his point, which makes the shorter man grow even more suspicious. “I, uhh—it’s just that,” Chanyeol starts again, fumbling over his words. “Y-you’re supposed to take off your b-boots outside, because… w-well, you’ll ruin my carpet if you keep on walking around with those on.”
“Oh,” Baekhyun mumbles out, checking on his feet. “You’re right. Sorry.” He takes the boots off and places them just behind the front door. When he looks up to see Chanyeol’s face again, the younger man doesn’t seem to look any better, so he sarcastically asks, “Is there anything else you’d like me to do next, your majesty?”
Chanyeol flinches a little but he tries to cover his nervousness by faking a smile and pushes Baekhyun around until he gets settled down on his couch.
“So, what happened?” Chanyeol immediately asks, sitting down beside him with a twitchy grin and edgy eyes.
Baekhyun furrows his eyebrows but he doesn’t have a room in his mind to think about Chanyeol today because he’s too busy trying to deal with other things he’s been feeling. So Baekhyun tries to pretend this is how Chanyeol usually behaves around him and decides to tell his best friend about his current issue.
“I can’t raise a child, Chanyeol,” Baekhyun says, leaning back to the couch and closes his eyes. He feels so weary after telling Chanyeol about his whole fight with his wife. Baekhyun pours his heart out, letting his friend know how frustrated, angry, and sad he is tonight. And how most of those feelings he has are directed to himself, rather than to his wife. “I just can’t. I’ll ruin everything.”
Chanyeol has been staying in silence for a while now, and that’s what Baekhyun needs. He just wants somebody to listen. He doesn’t need to be told what to do because he already knows what he should do. He just needs to talk about his problems until his chest gets lighter and he’s calm enough to act further.
“Hey, have a little faith in yourself,” Chanyeol responds and though Baekhyun can’t see him with his eyes closed, he can imagine him smiling. “You’ll be a great parent, Baek.”
“Don’t make me laugh,” Baekhyun replies with a scoff. “We both know I’ll be awful. I don’t know the first single thing about being a parent. I’ve spent almost my entire life dealing with my problems without my parents. I don’t have any role model. I don’t know where I have to learn about raising a kid on my own. I don’t know how to be a father because mine was never there for me.”
Chanyeol remains in silence again, and with that, Baekhyun can only hear the sound of soft rain tapping the windows alongside the constant voice of a ticking clock.
After a while though, Chanyeol finally speaks. “Have you told her about this yet?”
“I have…” Then he opens his eyes and thinks about it again. “Well, kind of. I mean, I told her that I wasn’t ready. That we weren’t ready. But she probably thought I was talking about the money and stuff.”
“Well, you should clear this up for her, ByunBaek.” Chanyeol hands him a can of beer with low amount of alcohol and Baekhyun idly takes it from him. “Maybe she’ll understand more if you tell her the whole truth.”
“But what if she hates me for it, Yeol?” he asks, sighing deeply again.
Chanyeol just laughs and shakes his head. “There’s no way she could ever hate you.”
Baekhyun huffs loudly and gazes at the ceiling with tired eyes. “I haven’t changed, have I?” Baekhyun whispers, slightly tilting his head to look at his best friend. “I’m still so insecure and worried about everything that hasn’t even happened yet.”
Chanyeol responds with a weak smile. “Well, like I said, you always overthink things. That’s always gonna be the first and the last thing you’re—”
“I’m lacking, I know,” Baekhyun continues, smiling back at him. “Thanks for listening to me, Yeol.”
The other man playfully shrugs. “Hey, it’s the least I can do after you managed to stop yourself from ruining my carpet with those dirty boots.”
Baekhyun doesn’t respond at his joke, but he does pay a mind to something else. “So, Park Chanyeol, when are you going to tell me what’s going on between you and your wife?”
Chanyeol looks like he’s about to jump out from his skin. “W-what?” he squeaks.
“Don’t play around with me, Chanyeol,” Baekhyun retorts, sitting up straight and looks straight into his eyes. “It’s Saturday night and your wife isn’t here. You said she always comes home every weekend, but where is she? “
“U-uh…” Chanyeol averts his eyes and nibbles on his bottom lip worriedly.
“In fact, she hasn’t been here for a while, has she?” Baekhyun guesses again. “Considering how your apartment is so messy and I see no presence of her in here.”
“What?” Chanyeol asks, faking a laugh. “What are you talking about—”
Baekhyun stands up and moves away from his spot with hasty steps. Before Chanyeol can ask him where he’s going, Baekhyun already walks straight into his bathroom and Chanyeol almost whimpers in horror because Baekhyun will find more proof to stand his argument.
“Only one toothbrush,” Baekhyun says from the bathroom, holding Chanyeol’s toothbrush in one hand.
Chanyeol, who has walked into the bathroom as well, tries to explain with anxious eyes. “S-she brings her toothbrush away with her as she goes on tours—”
Baekhyun doesn’t stop and now he’s starting to check on Chanyeol’s dirty clothes hamper. “There’s only your clothes in here.”
Chanyeol bites his lip nervously. “She already put her dirty clothes in the laundry—”
Baekhyun now moves toward the shampoo rack just beside the shower. “And no feminine products whatsoever.”
Chanyeol laughs, and Baekhyun winces at the weird sound he’s producing. “You know how she always uses the same shampoo and soap as I do, Baek. You’re over-reacting.”
“Huh, that’s funny,” Baekhyun says, throwing him a judging look. “Because I perfectly remember that she hates your choice of shampoo. She always hates mint, Chanyeol. We both know that.”
There’s a look on Chanyeol’s face that makes Baekhyun feel like winning, but the tall man doesn’t let things get away easily. “Baekhyun, there’s nothing wrong with me and her.”
“I never said there was something wrong between you two,” Baekhyun replies and Chanyeol feels like he just fell into a trap. “I just asked you what’s going on.”
After giving him another analyzing look, Baekhyun scurries down to Chanyeol’s bedroom.
“Baek!” The man calls, sounding a bit annoyed but most of all, afraid. “Baekhyun, just stop, okay? You’re—”
“And what’s with this?” Baekhyun asks, opening Chanyeol’s closet and points to his unorganized clothes in it. “First of all, you know how organized and tidy she is, but look at this.” Before Chanyeol can even respond, Baekhyun already taking those clothes away and checking them one by one. “Yours,” he says, throwing Chanyeol’s shirt away before he takes another fabric to his hand. “Yours.” He throws another one. “Yours.” And another one. “And yours again.”
Chanyeol’s head starts to throb. “Baekhyun, stop—”
“Where are her clothes, Chanyeol?” Baekhyun asks, not stopping. “No, let me rephrase that. Where are her things? I haven’t seen a single thing that belongs to her in this place. You can’t say that she brings all of her things with her as she goes on tours, right?”
Chanyeol looks away, clutching his hands to the side of his pants.
“In fact, there are no tours,” Baekhyun slowly guesses, “She hasn’t been going on tours, has she, Chanyeol?”
Chanyeol sighs, “Baek—”
“It’s been almost half a year since we last saw her—where is she?” Baekhyun demands more and more and Chanyeol becomes even more restless. It’s true that you and Baekhyun hadn’t met Chanyeol’s wife physically for at least, five months by now. You guys maintain contacts with each other but only through the phone. She always said she was busy and that when she actually came home, she wanted to spend some quality time with her husband alone because she’d be going on another tour on the next morning.
Chanyeol is almost losing his patience. “It’s not like what you think, Baek—”
“Have you been lying to us, Yeol?”
“No, you two lied to us—you said she—”
“ENOUGH!” Chanyeol’s booming voice leaves Baekhyun frozen to his feet for one second, but the shorter one looks at him with worried eyes instead of being in fear.
“Baek, I—” Chanyeol runs a hand through his hair, looking tired and frustrated. “This is not your business. Just… Please, let it go.”
“She’s my friend,” Baekhyun says carefully, not wanting to see Chanyeol blowing up on him anymore. “And you’re my best buddy, Yeol. I think it’s normal if I want to try to fix things up for you.”
“No,” Chanyeol says, determination in his eyes. “I won’t allow you. I don’t need your help.”
Baekhyun grits his teeth behind his closed lips. “You’re not being fair. Why can you help me when I can’t help you?”
“Life isn’t fair, Baek. It never is.” he responds coldly and this is the first time Baekhyun ever sees Chanyeol behaves this way.
Chanyeol isn’t stopping. “It’s laughable how you badly try to avoid having kids when your wife wants you to, while there’s another couple out there that’s been trying so hard to have one but can’t because of some certain reasons. You think that’s fair? Do you?”
Baekhyun is taken aback from his words. “Is that what happening to you?”
Chanyeol goes stiff but he keeps his face guarded. “I’m sorry but I’d like to ask you to leave, Baek.”
The older man’s gaze grows even sterner. “So that’s it? You want me to leave without knowing anything about you, is that it?”
After he exchanged heavy glances with the other man, Baekhyun asks his final question. “Why won’t you just tell me the truth?”
“Because the truth is never pretty,” Chanyeol simply replies with a shrug. “That’s the fact I’ve grown to be accustomed of. And you, out of all people, should know that. Just like how you try to avoid telling your wife the truth and instead run your way to speak it out to me.”
Baekhyun feels like he doesn’t know whom he’s talking to anymore. The Chanyeol he was with a few moments ago still bear some similarities with the old days Chanyeol who used to stare creepily with wide, excited eyes and smile at him with twitchy grins. But now, Baekhyun feels like he’s becoming a completely different person. Anger and sadness never suit him well and Baekhyun just wants to erase those expressions away from his face.
But the way Chanyeol glares at him forbid him to do so.
“You know,” Baekhyun finally comments as he makes his way out of the room. “We’re not completely different, Chanyeol. We both like to run away from our problems instead of facing them straight ahead.”
Before Baekhyun walks out his front door, he can faintly hear Chanyeol’s faint words. “No, I’ve faced my problems, Baekhyun. That’s why I’m living the consequences now.”
You don’t know how many hours has it passed since you cried yourself to sleep over your worriedness of Baekhyun’s whereabouts. But you notice and open your eyes slowly when Baekhyun climbs onto the bed, slips himself under the duvet, and hugs you from behind. He carefully wraps an arm around your waist and breathes softly behind you. The way his weight feels on the bed beside you comforts you and you smile in relief that he’s all right.
“Where have you been?” you softly ask as he settles down closer to you.
“Away.” When he speaks, you can feel his lips grazing the skin on the back of your neck. “Thinking about how stupid I was and missing you like crazy.”
You sigh contently and close your eyes. “I was being stupid too. I’m sorry.”
“I’m sorry I screamed at you.” His voice is so soft and tender and you can’t help but to forgive him a little, if not entirely.
You bring your hands over his and settle deeper in his embrace. “I’m sorry I hit you.”
“That did hurt,” he murmurs and in any other occasion, you would laugh over his whiny respond but this time, you just turn to the other side so you can face him directly and presses a small kiss to the tip of his nose.
“I’m sorry. You know I didn’t mean it,” you say, caressing his cheekbones. He nods in return and shows you a sleepy smile. You tenderly move his damp bangs out of his half-opened eyes as you speak. “Why are you so wet?”
“I forgot to bring an umbrella with me,” he replies quietly, leaning into your touch. “And I didn’t have anywhere else to stay and I missed you so bad so I kind of walked here even though it’s still raining outside.”
“You’re dumb,” you say, chuckling a little. “But this somehow seems familiar and I like it.” You think that maybe Baekhyun knows that you’re referring to the part where Baekhyun first visited your room back in college days after hearing his brother, Zitao’s bad condition in the hospital. But he doesn’t dwell in it more because the incident that follows after that doesn’t exactly bring out good memories to talk about.
“I’m sorry,” he says, settling his temple against yours. “You’re right, I’ve been avoiding you without proper explanations. I’m an , I’m sorry.”
“Will you tell me why, then?” you ask quietly, pressing your cheek to the pillow. “I want to know the real answers, not like how you’re worried about the money and how we’re not ready for this.”
“But it’s true. We’re not ready for this yet and—” before he can finishes his line, you cut him off with a sudden kiss on his lips, shutting him up effectively. It’s just a simple and not long lasting kiss, but at least Baekhyun is a bit surprised to continue speaking.
“Baekhyun,” you mumble out softly. The tip of your nose is touching his and he breathes out at the small, endearing contact. “I know there’s something you’re hiding from me. I’m sorry if I sound too demanding, but I really feel like I need to know this so we can work this out. So I’ll know how to fix it together with you.”
Baekhyun sighs and momentarily closes his eyes before he opens them with more sincerity in them. “But you’ll laugh if I tell you,” he murmurs almost inaudibly.
“I won’t,” you say, lifting a hand to trace the side of his face. “So tell me? Please?”
He gazes deep into your eyes, making sure that he can believe you. And that is unnecessary, because he already trusts you with all his life.
“Well…” he starts, heaving restlessly. “I’m scared.”
He nods his head, breaking off your hug so he can lie down on the bed and stare at the ceiling as he speaks. “Having a baby is taking another new level of responsibility,” he says, “And I don’t think I’m capable enough to have that happening in my life right now.”
“Baekhyun,” you call him with a soothing voice, lacing your fingers with his. “I’m scared too, but I want this. And it’s going to happen anytime soon anyway, right?”
But your husband doesn’t answer you.
“Right?” you ask, making it sure that it isn’t a rhetorical question and that you actually need an answer. You can actually hear the fear in your voice. “Baekhyun, you’re not telling me that we’re never going to have kids, are you?”
“No, it’s not—” Baekhyun sighs, rubbing his temple and closes his eyes. “Look, I really don’t know how to be a parent. I honestly don’t know what to do or what to say to our kids. And plus, children always kind of… freak me out.”
You stop moving for a few seconds, before you blink your eyes twice. “Children freak you out?” you repeat and he nods, a little bit too adorable for the situation you’re both in. “What do you mean children freak you out?” you ask, taking your hand back. “Baekhyun, you love kids!”
“No, I don’t,” he hurriedly corrects you, “You just assumed that I do.”
You stare at him with a deep frown on your temple. “Baek, I can’t believe you. I mean, that time when we went to the adventure land together, you were dealing with that kid—the one who thought we were prince charming and Cinderella—much better than I did!”
“Well…” Baekhyun turns to lie on his back and stares at the ceiling. “That was because I wanted to impress you.”
“Don’t make me say it twice, Sweetheart,” he says, cheeks reddening. “But yeah. I didn’t get close to that boy because I love kids. I actually hate them. I really can’t stand them.” He stays in silence for a few seconds before he whispers, “I’m scared of them.”
You’re gaping, mouth hanging wide on your jaws but you don’t know whether it’s because you’re too surprised over your husband’s phobia toward children or the fact that he was dealing with his fear just to try to impress you.
“I honestly don’t like being near them,” Baekhyun continues, furrowing his eyebrows. “They’re loud and rude and all they can do is just embarrass people around them.”
“Well, of course, they’re kids,” you reply, almost rolling your eyes but he glares at you before you can do so. “I mean, what do you expect them to do, Baek? They barely know anything. You’re all grown up but you still behave the same way as them for most of the times.”
“Yah!” Baekhyun protests. “Do you know how mean they can be? Remember when they pushed me at the ice-skating rink?”
You exhale heavily, wanting to rub your temple because it’s starting to ache with all of this conversation. “Honey, they were just playing around—”
“Yeah well, I don’t like that,” Baekhyun grumbles, “I don’t like being made fun of.”
“Baekhyun, our kid isn’t going to be like that,” you say, still trying to comfort him. “He’s going to be kind, and sweet, and although he’ll probably be a bit sassy like you, he’ll still be the cutest kid out there.”
“I’m not sassy,” Baekhyun retorts and you smile, kissing his cheek. “And sorry, ‘he’?”
“Yeah,” you reply, scooting closer and lie your head down on his chest as you snuggle up to him. “I want to have a boy. Little Baekgu Junior.”
“A boy…” Baekhyun says as if he’s in a trance. “Who’ll become like… me?”
You nod again, thinking that maybe he becomes more relaxed after hearing your words. “He’ll have your traits, Baek. Hardworking, loyal, and sweet, although maybe he’s going to be a bit stubborn, but that’s okay. He’s going to be super handsome too, just like his dad.”
And Baekhyun does seem like he’s calming down for a bit, but then suddenly, he breaks away from your touch. “N-no,” he stutters. “This—I can’t do this.” Then he turns to his side of the bed, giving you the sight of his back only.
You’re honestly surprised at his sudden change of attitude. “Baek, what—”
“Let’s go to sleep,” he says hastily. “I don’t want to talk about this anymore.”
You scowl at his behavior but end up lying on your side as well, grumbling as you glue your eyes to the wall. “I thought everything would get better,” you mutter and Baekhyun doesn’t respond.
The rest of the night passes by with the two of you pretending to be asleep just to avoid the conversation and another fight to break upon.
“Hey,” Baekhyun murmurs softly to your ear, circling his arms around your waist from the back. You’re not that surprised when he suddenly pops up behind you as you wash the dishes this morning. Instead, you only keep looking at the dirt on the plates and focus your thoughts on how to clean them thoroughly.
Hearing no respond from you, your husband places his chin on your right shoulder. “Are you still mad at me?”
You stay quiet until he finally presses a small peck on your nape and whispers, “I said I’m sorry. Forgive me?” You can imagine him pouting and blinking his eyes adorably behind you and those melt your heart a little.
With a sigh, you turn around and face him, leaning against the kitchen’s counter to steady yourself. Turns out your guess is right. Baekhyun is really pouting, although maybe he does it unconsciously. His cherry red lower lip juts out cutely and you want to pinch his nose so he’ll stop looking at you like that.
“You look like a kicked puppy,” you comment and he smiles a little, a bit cheekily, which melts your heart even more. “Baekhyun, I’m not angry with you anymore, but you know this has to stop, don’t you? I want to have a baby with you. It’s okay if you don’t want it to be right now, but I just need to know that we’re going to have one someday.”
Baekhyun looks disappointed with your words, but he nods nonetheless. “I know, just…” he pauses as he leans his forehead against yours and closes his eyes. “Just give me some more time, okay?” He breathes out softly and you give up and press a small kiss to his lips just to give him some comfort.
You want to ask how much time does he need because it’s been two years and a half since you two got married and he still hasn’t shown any interest in having a kid with you. You may not admit it out loud, but this actually scares you. You know well how stubborn Baekhyun can be sometimes. When he says no to something, he keeps his words till the end. You just hope that this situation isn’t one of those scenarios that involve him not having a change of mind.
“Okay,” you say, agreeing for now. He looks content enough that he actually pulls you close and embraces you properly after he kisses your temple.
“I love you,” he says and you don’t say anything back because you just don’t feel like it. You’re too disappointed with the whole thing and how this conversation ends without any acceptable solution. He notices how upset you are so he breaks away from the one-sided hug and tries to put on a happy smile on his face. “I’m hungry, and that kimchi spaghetti you just made smells really good right now.”
You offer him back a weak smile and pat his cheek. “Then go eat your breakfast,” you say and he kisses your cheek in return.
“Will you join me?” he asks, looking hopeful but you know he’s just trying too hard to make everything seems okay. But it’s not okay and you know that. You’re not about to pretend that everything is fine with you two. Because unlike Baekhyun who likes to run away from his problems and pretend everything is perfect, you prefer to just face your problem directly and solve it as soon as possible.
But you can’t put an end to your issue with him without his help.
“I can’t. I gotta go get ready for work,” you answer him with a faint smile before you walk away from him. “Remember to clean up after you’re finished with your food.”
Baekhyun stands there in the middle of the dining room, looking lost and sad. But there’s nothing you can do to fix it right now. Instead of saying more reassuring words to wash away his worry, you just slip yourself into your bedroom and stand with your back against the door.
You and Baekhyun don’t actually fight about this anymore after that, but the tension is still there, going on and on for days and no one tries to put an end to it. The two of you still talk, still kiss each other’s lips before one of you goes to work, and Baekhyun still lays his head on your lap as you two watch the TV together.
But smiles are often being left behind in your conversations. And you don’t feel the spark in your kisses anymore; it’s like you’re kissing him just because it’s a habit that must be done, and not a necessity that should be reached because otherwise you’d spend your day longing for his kiss and his affection. And your fingers never curl around his brown locks anymore even though you know he’s waiting for it the moment he moves his head to your lap.
No, you two aren’t fighting. It’s just that for now, it’s like you exist in his world and he exists in yours, but the red strings between you two has been detached and no one bothers to find a glue to link it back. Or maybe you did, but you want him to make the move first.
This happens for almost a week, but it feels like forever.
“Goodbye, kids~” you say, smiling until your cheeks hurt as you wave your hands to your students. The little girls look cute wearing their ballet tutu skirts and having their hair braided cutely by their mothers. There was one little girl with freckles on her face that asked you to tie her hair in ponytail this morning. And she was so cute and sweet that you couldn’t help but feel warm in your chest as you did what she asked you to. She giggled and hugged you by the waist when you were finished. “Thank you, Teacher. You’re the best!”
“Ah~” you muttered to yourself, still waving in the air although your students have left through the exit door of your dance studio. “I want one like her…”
“But do you want a y, smoldering hot husband?” A familiar voice makes you jump in surprise and you almost fall with your face first on the ground but the man with the y, husky voice you’ve grown to love, wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you toward his chest.
“Hi,” he says, still a little bit awkward but he starts regaining his old self back. His eyes are somewhat determined and your heart flutters because maybe, Baekhyun has found the glue to fix the string as well.
“Baekhyun,” you say, giving him a stern look although your lips curve up into a tiny, playful smile. “You’re going to be the death of me someday, I swear to God.” You try to fake a pout so he’ll know how you’re trying to warm up to him too.
Baekhyun smiles back with so much affection in his eyes before he leans in and whispers in your ear, “When she shall die, take her and cut her out into stars and she shall make the face of heaven so fine that all the world will be in love with night and pay no worship to the garish sun."
You giggle, squirming in his arms especially when he kisses your earlobe. “Don’t you go all Romeo and Juliet again on me, Baekgu. I think I’ve had enough.”
He chuckles lightly as he nudges your cheek with the tip of his nose and brushes his lips against your jawline. “I miss you so much.”
“I miss you too,” you whisper, giggling again when he playfully rubs his nose with yours over and over again. “Stop it! Bad puppy! Bad puppy!”
“I miss you more,” he adds, finally ending his childish treatment by pressing a small kiss on your nose. Then he looks at you with his puppy eyes and dramatically pouts like a five year old.
“Now what?” you ask, huffing.
“Baekkie wants a kiss~” he sings songs, pouting even more and blinks his eyes in a way that should be illegal for being too cute. “Baekkie hasn’t been kissed for a while~ Baekkie is saaaaaa—” you slap a hand around his mouth and he goes quiet, but when you remove it away from his face, his whining continues “—aaaaaaad~”
“Okay, okay, all right!” You laugh, playfully punching him on the shoulder. “Oh my God, what am I going to do with you,” you complain but you pull him closer and finally silence him with a proper kiss on his lips. He lets out a chuckle that’s soon to be muffled with the warmth of your mouth. The way he kisses is too playful to be romantic, but too sweet and passionate to be childish. It’s perfectly the kind of kiss that you miss the most from him.
“Better?” you ask a little breathlessly when he finally lets you go after God knows how long.
“Mmm, not yet...” He leans in to kiss you again and you melt into his embrace one more time. He kisses you languidly, patiently, and just savoring every touch of your lips and every soft little sound that you make. When he pulls away, he traces your lower lip with his thumb, and gazes at you in the way that makes you feel like you’re drowning. “Okay done, I’m all better now.”
The way he grins is so cheesy, you want to palm your face in embarrassment. But instead, you glue your lips together with his again.
“By the way, how could you just pop up here so suddenly?” you ask, circling your arms around his neck. “Did you use the back door?”
“No,” he says, nuzzling your nose with his. “I flew down from heaven to come and pick you up for dinner.”
“Oh really?” You try to look impressed, even dramatically gasping at his greasy line.
“Yes, really,” he says, placing one arm around your waist and suddenly twirls you around in a small, awkward dance that is so Baekhyun. You laugh as you follow your lead because even after all this time, Baekhyun still can’t dance. But that’s a part of him that you love too, right? It’s always cute to see him trying so hard to follow the things you like, just like how you usually try to sing along with him whenever he hums in the shower.
“So, tell me—” Your sentence gets cut off short because Baekhyun almost drops you. Thank God his reflexes aren’t as bad as his dance moves. When you glare threateningly at him, he only grins and mouths “Sorry, sorry.”
“Hey, Sweetheart,” he says, stopping himself from twirling you around again—because it’s actually life-threatening when you’re doing it with Mr. Byun Baekhyun—and he just resorts to pulling you close and sway with you from side to side. “Do you wanna know where I like to fly other than to heaven?”
You only give him a look, silently telling him that you know he’s going to be embarrassing the out of you again.
“Your heart,” he answers it himself, showcasing his teeth in a bright smile. If it weren’t because of his eye smile, you would’ve punched him for being too gross.
“Can you fly to hell next time too?” you retort, scrunching your nose at his greasy pick-up line. “And maybe stay there?”
He wiggles his eyebrows before he throws a wink at you. “Only if you give me the taste of the sweetest sin that is your love, my dear.”
“Hmm, okay,” you reply, “I’ll tell my other boyfriend that I’m spending a night with you today.”
“You are so mean,” he says, laughing a little at your comeback. You thought he would kiss you again, but he didn’t. Instead, he embraces you properly and places his chin on your head. “I’m sorry for being an these past few weeks.”
“You’ve said that already.” You rub his back to calm him down because Baekhyun suddenly grows tense. “And like I said, I’m not angry with you.”
You can imagine him displaying his usual pout. “But you still want me to agree about this whole pregnancy thing?” he weakly questions.
You nod. “Sooner would be better.”
Baekhyun breathes out deeply, before he pulls back and cups your cheek with one hand. He smiles as his thumb traces comforting circles along your cheekbone.
“Baekhyun?” you call, slightly tilting your head in curiosity. “Are you okay?”
“I think you’re right,” he says, although his eyes still look hesitant. “I think we need to talk about it.”
You’re honestly a bit surprised with how the conversation is going. “You… do?”
“Yes,” he answers, a little bit forced to be honest, but you can see how sincere he’s trying to work this out. “And that’s why I’m taking you out for a fancy dinner. We can talk about it as we eat.”
“A fancy dinner?” you ask, almost laughing. “Baekhyun, I’m currently wearing a pink leotard. I don’t think any fancy restaurant would allow me to come inside in my ballet costume.”
“Well, then we’ll use this,” he says, snatching his wallet from his pocket and flashes you his credit card. “Let’s find a classy and also preferably a bit ty dress for you to wear for the night and for me to tear it apart before we go to bed.”
You would’ve rolled your eyes of his lame joke if you weren’t too surprised. You frown, gaping a little. “You—” this doesn’t make sense at all. Is Baekhyun really offering to throw his money away for a dress? “You’re going to spend some money for my dress just so we can eat in a fancy restaurant? I thought we were supposed to save our money.”
“Well, of course, but I want to make you happy,” he says, snickering as he plants a kiss on your cheek. “And okay, maybe I just got some extra money to spare. Guess who just got hired to do a three-days show in Jeju today?”
You gasp, eyes growing wide. “Really?!”
“Yep,” Baekhyun has his smug smile on. “It’s like a private concert where—”
“Oh my God, Baekhyun!” You jump back into his arms, almost crushing him by the neck from your bone-crushing hug. “I’m so happy for you!”
“Whoa, easy there~” Baekhyun chuckles happily, holding you by the waist and presses a kiss on your shoulder. “But thank you, Sweetheart.”
“Why are you thanking me?” you ask, laughing a little. “This is all you.”
“Yeah but,” Baekhyun replies, pulling back to look you in the eyes. “I wouldn’t be able to do any of this if it weren’t for you.”
It doesn’t happen quite often anymore, but at particular times like this, Baekhyun still succeeds in making you blush like the old days when you two were still new in dating. “Are you being greasy again, Baekgu?”
“No, I’m being honest,” he says, pressing his temple against yours and smiles adorably.
You smile back and look into his eyes, reeling in his sweet scent. “Can you be honest without being greasy?”
Baekhyun softly laughs. “It’s kind of a package deal, Sweetheart.”
“Come here, you greasy bacon~” You shake your head in amusement, pulling him down for a chaste kiss. “I love you, Baekhyun.”
“I love you too.” And he takes control of the kiss, making it deeper and slower. Baekhyun can be so sensual when he wants too, no matter where he is. “Don’t ever give me the cold shoulders again, Sweetheart. I can’t stand it.”
“I’m sorry,” you murmur softly and realize how much it has pained you as well.
“Don’t ever say that you’ll leave me, okay?” The way he speaks doesn’t sound demanding at all. It sounds more like he’s pleading, to be honest. “We’ll try to work our problems together. All of them. Promise me that.”
You nod your head, looking into his eyes as you spell your oath. “I promise.”
SO SORRY FOR THE LATE UPDATE AND THIS IS BASICALLY THE TIEST CHAPTER I'VE WRITTEN FOR BAEK'S STORY AND I AM SO SORRY
I've been having a REALLY hard time writing this and I don't know why. I hope you guys still like it though :'( sorry if I dissappointed you after waiting for so long.
anywaaaaaay~ BAEKHYUN SOUNDS SO GOOD IN THE NEW ALBUM I AM CRYING AND SOBBING AND BAWLING AND DYING THAT IS ALL I LOVE YOU BAEKGU I REALLY LOVE YOU I DO AND I LOVE MY READERS JUST AS MUCH AS I LOVE YOU
DO YOU GUYS KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN TO ME I LOVEEEEEE YOUUUUU *SCREAMS AND AGGRESIVELY THROWS SLOPPY KISSES AT MY READERS*