They sat crowded around a small table, elbows knocking and bags hanging from their seats. It had been a slow day at Taeyeon’s workplace and the rain had scared away most of the cities inhabitants off the street. Following Jessica’s advice, she had called the band over to, what the girl had hazily termed, ‘sorting their out’.

‘The sheet’s not that badly ruined though’ Yuri squinted at the paper and traced some lines with a chewed pencil ‘the melody bit is gone-‘

‘The most important bit’ Hyoyeon quipped

‘…yeah well, but we can salvage it right?’ Yuri looked at Taeyeon ‘it wasn’t that complicated was it?’

Taeyeon didn’t answer but continued doodling on her napkin

‘Can’t you recall anything? I mean you basically wrote it’ the tanned girl insisted

‘Yeah, Taeyeon, I mean melodies are quite basic’ said Hyoyeon ‘Jessica?’

‘Hmmm?’

‘Would you like to contribute to our conversation?’

‘No’

‘Thought so’

Their exchange made Taeyeon smile.

‘I can’t remember it though’ she said, still looking down. ‘It’s ridiculous, but I can’t. You guys just heard it once.And when I wrote it, I did it in one go.’

‘How many times have you played it in total then?’

‘Three times at most, Hyo’

‘But it was really catchy’ Yuri whined ‘you know Hyo’s weird friend would be totally over it’

‘He’s actually quite average as far as drama producers go. At the end of the day, it was only an internet drama thing. Experimental stuff’

‘But incredibly popular’ the other girl pressed on ‘people were quoting it on my yoga class like crazy’

‘You mean those 60 year old rubber-made women you teach?’ Jessica questioned.

‘No, the reduced session for stressed-out students. You know, mostly law faculty and some social sciences.’

‘The deadline is in a week though’

‘So? You can remember it Taeng, just squeeze that little brain of yours and-‘

‘And even if she gets the melody, you’re forgetting about the lyrics and arrangements and Hyo’s experimental sounds that she insists on using…, what was it again, a dumb-box’

‘A TERMENVOX, Jessica. A TER-MEN-VOX. And it’s not experimental, it’s just not well known

‘Right, and I am ugly’

‘Well, your right side-’

‘Shut it’

‘You’re just picking on me because I’m a modern dance major and thus too liberal for you’

Jessica rolled her eyes.

‘No, I’m picking on you because you think cowbells are an adequate substitute for cyms’

‘Hey, I liked it!’ complained Yuri

Jessica sighed and nudged Taeyeon but the girl refused to look up.

‘Taeng, don’t feel bad, it was an accident’

‘Yeah it was raining a lot’

Taeyeon stood up and stared out of café’s windows

‘It’s stopped raining’

‘So?’

‘So I need to get back to work, this place might pick up and I need to sort out some stuff’

***

When her friends had left, after a heated argument between Jessica and Hyoyeon about how they were a distraction to Taeyeon’s work and Hyoyeon’s customer and human rights, Taeyeon slumped in one of the bar stools, her hand lazily grabbing the cleaning cloth. There was no way the song would be finished by the deadline- Hyo’s friend would just find some other indie rock band for the ending credits. The past days she had tried not to worry too much, telling herself that they’d be other opportunities, that it wasn’t a big deal. The stupid melody wasn't even that good, for some reason she just couldn't pinpoint. And it was just the ending of some internet show. Sure, the first season was proving to be popular with the younger audience but hey, second season’s usually flopped. Nobody bothered listening to the ending anyways, especially when they could just move to the next episode or something by the click of a mouse.

But the song, or what little they had of it, could have been just right. She knew it and she was sure the others knew it. It had been a sad melody, not the kind where people die in hospitals or are shot in the slow motion but the type that plays when the protagonist visits their hometown and see that everything has changed and that their childhood memories were gone. That was what the drama had been roughly about anyways, a kind of sweet sadness and nostalgia, a sadness that wasn’t heart wrenching because of the special effects but because of how inevitable it was. And Taeyeon had felt that sadness not too long ago, and at that time, she had heard a similar melody.

She remembered, not sure who, someone on tv talking about inspiration. She didn’t recall the rest of the talk but there was one story that was firmly etched in her memory. It was about a famous composer that while driving his car, a song came to him. But being too busy to write it down as he was driving and well, traffic laws and all that, he waved it away as he cried ‘not now, can’t you see I’m busy!’. She wasn’t even sure what had happened afterwards, if the song had come back, if the guy lost it forever, if he ever wrote it down. But when she had gone back to Jeonju and she saw the park where she used to play now in disuse- with the sand unkempt and full of weeds, the swing seats missing and the little wooden house where she would hide broken and smelling strongly of urine, she couldn’t help but shed a tear. Because it was at that moment where she realized that her childhood was now gone and that the things that used to be her world, were no longer there to act a reminder, a gateway back to those days. And a song, the song, her song had played in her head at that time.

The internet drama was a bittersweet slice of life about growing up and realizing that dreams are precisely that- just dreams. Something that she knew too well. Hyoyeon’s friend had heard them play before and offered them a month to come up with something for the ending as a joke. They had taken it up more as entertainment than real work until the day that Taeyeon had been so close to catching her song again. The day she had remembered what her dream was. And the next day, what dreams really were.

She closed her grip on the cloth and began to wipe the bar down rhythmically, hoping that it would somehow coax that melody into returning in its purest form. Not the hastily and half-written down version of some nights ago, but the one she heard back at the playground. The true song.

***

‘So did you tell them?’ Jiwoong asked

She nodded in response.

‘Did they take it well?’

She nodded again.

‘You’re not going to speak to me are you?’

‘It’s just-

‘I thought so!’ he interrupted gleefully.

‘I don’t get it. Why are you dressed so nicely?’

‘I told you, I’m meeting some friends’

‘And you wear aftershave?’

‘There’s going to be girls’

‘So?’

‘So I’m single and nearly 25 and I want a girlfriend. Problem?’

‘Yeah’

‘Oh yeah?’

Taeyeon put her chopsticks down.

‘What are you going to do if you get one?’

‘I don’t know, go out on dates?’

‘What about her coming home and things like that?’

‘She can’t come home? You know, it’s technically my apartment’

‘…so where does that leave me?’ she muttered.

‘As my sister. Why? Jealous of another woman in my life?’

‘Hell, no’

‘So? I thought you want to live on Seoul on your own. I thought you made that very clear when you went on this huge rant against me for applying for a Seoul transfer’ he scoffed jokingly ‘as if you were the only person allowed to make it big in the city’

‘I’m actually the only person not allowe-‘

He cut her off.

‘You know, Taeng, you can be real mature sometimes I give you that, but other times, you are the world’s greatest drama queen. You will remember that melody on time. You will make it the greatest melody there's ever been. You will convince your friend’s friend to use the song. You will get popular and…’ he disheveled her hair ‘you will buy me a new car when it happens’

‘And you say this because…’

‘Because I’m your older brother and I believe in you-’

‘Yeah right.’

He cupped her face and smiled, his eyes turning to crescents.

‘Always. Even when you don’t.’

She looked down, unable to hold his gaze.

‘Anyways, I’m going to go. Wash the dishes for me and don’t stay up too late, you have an early shift tomorrow.’

He flung his jacket over his shoulder and walked out.