P5 | The Box Was Never Empty by KirbyLovesToto

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''The Box was never Empty by KirbylovesToto''

Reviewer: StarlightAegyo
Mark :40/50 or 80%


Title: 4/5
As for the title. All I can say is... ''What?'' then as I read on the story, I get that sudden urge of mystery.

Description  Foreword: 8/10
The description and foreword, we're well written. The way you wrote the description about the story was very 'movie-like' It made me wonder of what could happen in the story. And its a good thing you warned them that it'll be disturbing on the last part of the foreword.

Characters: 3/5
The characters are well written. I can clearly imagine Yong-guk doing that to the woman on the first chapter. It was disturbing yet mysterious. And I loved that.

Grammar: 8/10
The grammar seems to be nice. Since, I saw that you've already had other shops to review for you and I felt that you didn't have to ask us to review it.

Plot: 8/10
The plot seems to be new for me. But, I've read a minimal amount of gore-like stories like this. And it seems to have psycho's on them as well. The first chapter is quite disturbing though, but it was well written and thiller reader's would love that.

Flow: 4/5
To me, the flow was a bit confusing, At first. But, then, when I read the story, it didn't feel awkward anymore. I mean, the first parts of the first chapter were zelo's dreams right? It was a challenge to figure that out. But, since it was well written, I tend to enjoy that solving the mystery of figuring out what the first part meant.

Bonus(based on font,posters/background): 5/5
The font you used was simple yet inviting to read the mysterious story. Even the posters and background suited the story. Thus, making it more mysteriously inviting. And for that, I gave you a 5.
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Super waiting on your story.
Although, its kinda disturbing and there's a lot of unpleasant gore in it,
I still loved the mystery and horror.
I wish to write horror stories like yours someday and hope that you
practice more on your english my dear 12 year old writer~!

 

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Reviewer: Luhansperf
Mark : 39/50 or 80%

Click here to see the review

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Average Mark: 79/100 or 79 %
Keep up the good work !

 

 

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Comments (189)

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AmieDMJ
#1
Chapter 46: bye bye~ I love this shop so much /cries a Han river
Cinnimoroll08
#2
Chapter 46: farewell TT^TT
(im kinda interested but idk xD)
DobuOnew
#3
Can we be affiliates?

Somnium Review Shop
http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/549557/somnium-review-shop-open-dreams-request-review-shop-reviews

I would be glad if you accepted. :)
-farewell
#4
MindragonFan #5
Chapter 44: Holy sheit, the x-men trailer is amazing!! Teach me your ways, sensei. *bows to your awesomeness*
fluffpenguin
#6
Chapter 3: When will you be open again?
fluffpenguin
#7
Chapter 3: Is my dp that I requested last time included as one time that I requested?
buttsmex
#8
Chapter 42: Reviewer 1: Well.. i meant that love isnt easy. especially if it was ur own dad. and to make it all for worse, he died. and ur pregnant when ur suppose to. sorry if i was not being expressive lol. ^^' Thank you. Haha thanks. I was wondering about that. XD Really? Its my third story.. so.. kinda nervous if i still make mistakes. :3 well.. i dont exactly love m-preg.. but yeah. lol Thanks you. :) Its ok. Thanks for the time. <3

Reviewer 2: I know. I'm sorry.. ;_; lol jk. I did the title first then the story. I guess it was a mistake lol. I dunno what to put.. T^T my wrong. i should've put kris as a slight appearance. Yeah. I'm from malaysia. But i'm always on top in my class when it comes to english though. ^^ And okie. Hmm.. ok. Thanks. I was thinking that. But dang, i use it to much. Thanks for the time~ <3
--vikseu
#9
Chapter 39: Whoops~ i think you forgot something. can i ask for a redo?