~It's Friday Friday gotta get- Taemin smacked his phone off his night stand and sat up in his bed. The phone had gone silent.
'If I ever hear that song again...' he mentally cursed the radio station for playing it and ruining his morning like this. On a Friday, that nerve ! He was sure hundreds of other people were feeling the same way right now. He then looked over at his phone thinking of wether to go revive it or just stay in bed. He sighed...he needed his phone so... After a few minutes he managed to start the phone again. He only had a schedule for the first half of the day so he would be free after noon.
And some time today he would meet with Jongin again. At this moment he had already thought about it so much that all his worries and hopes had faded and he felt nothing of it. That is was usually happens when he overthinks things but he knew he will be freaking out about it later. Right now he only felt annoyed and tired of his emotions. He wasn't going to think about it anymore he told himself. He always thought too hard and it made him appear nervous and quiet. Soon enough he would talk about this with Jongin and really he was the one who should be nervous because he was the one who had kissed him. Taemin just prayed in silence that they would be as good friends as before after today...
As he was having breakfast he kept getting the feeling that someone was watching him but every time he turned around and scanned the room, there was no one there. He tried to shrug of the feeling and just continuing eating but it really felt like someone was watching him. He made a super quick turn and for the first time noticed a figure dissappearing into the shadows.
'Ah I knew it !'he said and stood up, ready to defend himself if the stranger was of evil nature.
'Who is it ?!' he said loudly.
'It's just me, don't hit !' a voice shouted and the person stepped out from the shadows and in to the light.
'Kibum hyung ?! I thought you left, you scared the out of me !' Taemin shouted as he sat back down in his chair trying to calm down his heart.
'Jeez boy were you planning on beating me up with that spoon ?' Key laughed pointing at the spoon in Taemin's right hand.
Taemin looked at the spoon and realized he was holding it like it was a sword.
'Yah it's not funny hyung !' he yelled and threw the spoon at Key.
Key however was laughing like crazy by now kneeling down on the floor and holding his stomach.
'Your face !' he laughed.
'As if the devil was coming !' Key laughed almost out of breath.
This had Taemin laughing too. As they were starting to calm down Taemin remembered that he should ask Key what he was doing there creeping on him like that in the first place.
'So...why did you have to creep up on me like that or was it just for amusement ?' he asked Key as he continued to eat what was left of his breakfast.
'Ah, actually I was just hoping you were going to talk to yourself like you usually do when something is bothering you.' Key said.
'Say what ? I don't do that.' Taemin said and looked at Key with wide eyes.
Key just gave him a look that said "Whatever you say" before he rolled his eyes.
'Ok then, why don't you tell me what's going on ?' he then asked.
'There is nothing special going on.' Taemin said and looked away.
'Huh, come on, I know there is something.' Key obviously had noticed.
'Is it a girl...or...perhaps a boy...?' Key said and observed Taemin's reaction.
Taemin could feel his eyes widen and he almost gasped. How could this person be so observant ? He thought he had done a pretty good job hiding it. What came out of his mouth as a reply was the complete opposite of what he wanted to say.
'What if it is...?' he couldn't believe he had just said that, he had totally given away the "it's nothing" act and to make it all worse he had made it sound like it was about a boy as well.
Taemin wanted to just slap himself for just saying that and under the table he was pinching his own legs in attempt to hold back the panic he was now feeling.
'I mean-' his voice cracked and his whole body screamed "NOOOOO!" so he turned his head away and coughed trying to cover up the panic once again. He really did not want to talk about this, he wasn't even sure what "this" even was.
'Guessed so...' Key said and smiled.
'I can tell you don't want to talk about it right now but if you ever do, I'm here Taemin-ah.' and with that said he stood up and walked out of the room.
Taemin just sat there with his mouth wide open. He almost couldn't believe he was so lucky that he had friends that just understood him like that, without awkward explanitions and all that stuff. He smiled to himself, feeling really good right now. Then he cleaned up and left for his schedule.
Jongin was nervous, he had finished his work for today and he knew Taemin had too. What's left was just to call him or text rather because Jongin didn't think he could handle calling him right now. He knew Taemin wanted to meet and all but he couldn't help worrying that Taemin would...he didn't know exactly what he was afraid of actually... He sighed and looked at his phone.
'Oh , here goes everything.' he opened the phone and started typing. He had decided they would meet at his parents house and he would cook something easy like they used to do when they were younger. Though Taemin really couldn't cook even the most simple dishes leaving Jongin to do most of the cooking, they always had a good time. It was one of Jongin's favourite things to do. He realized it was actually a long time ago now since they had done that. His parents was out of town so they would absolutely have enough privacy. He sended the messy text message without looking at it twice because he knew that if he did he would regret it.
After that he started making his way towards his parents house to make sure there were any food and that the house was atleast presentable. He was not going to clean on a Friday night so he really hoped his parents had cleaned before they left.
The sky had already become dark and the night air was chilly although it was summer. He took deep breaths and enjoyed the fresh air after spending a whole day inside. The stars and the moon were visible behind some grey clouds. It was full moon and he suddenly thought of this movie he had seen with Taemin once. Werewolfs were ruling the streets and the full moon had turned red to become a blood moon. Every human who saw the full moon became crazy and joined the werewolfs. He remembered how he had cuddled up to Taemin then because he was scared. God, that was years ago he realized. He wished to cuddle up to Taemin again and suddenly blushed remembering Taemin's smell. What kind of a foul even remembers stuff like that ?
When he arrived at his parents house he was glad to see that it was clean and that there were plenty of food. He started preparing right away as he realized that Taemin would come in only a few minutes. He wanted to pretty much be done cooking as Taemin arrived in case there would be any awkward silence or even worse...cold silence.
'Ooooh myyyy gooooosh.' His stomach was a massive black hole of swirling emotions and if it had not been for the fact that he was cooking he would have puked. His hands were shaking and his pulse was way faster than normal. He had planned what to say and how to explain the kiss probably a million times but nothing made sense now and he had forgotten everything he meant to say.
And then the door bell rang. Jongin actually dropped the towel he was holding and he started jumping around the room trying to make everything look perfect. He ran past the mirror and then ran back to it again and started to fix his hair in some kind of presentable style. His left leg started twitching from his nervousness and it made him almost fall on his head while sneaking up to the peek hole of the door. Oh god it was true, this was real, Taemin was standing outside. Jongin choke on the air he was trying to breath when he saw Taemin's perfect face and he couldn't help but to make a weird girlish (fangirl seeing ultimate bias kinda) sound at Taemins wavy ponytail. The he remembered he still had to open the door. He threw the door open with so much power it startled both himself and most of all Taemin.
'Omo !' Taemin jumped back a bit and held his hand in front of his mouth, eyes staring right at Jongin.
Jongin tried to say something but all that came out of his mouth was air. He could feel his whole face turning red. He shook his head and attempted to speak once again.
'Come on in.' he said and smiled insecurely as he scratched the back of his head.
Taemin laughed nervously and stepped inside. He took of his jeans jacket and shoes. Jongin smiled sheepishly and led him to the dinner room although Taemin knew perfectly well where it was located. Jongin was at this point completely lost in his feelings. He tried to hold back laughter and walk straight because butterflies were at war in his stomach and his body was like jelly. He was pretty sure he let out awkward "heeeh" (like really high pitched pikachu style) sounds every now and then but it might as well be in his head because he was going crazy at this point.
As they sat down to eat, the ever so awkward silence fell. Taemin was the first to break it because Jongin had absolutely no idea what to say.
'How is your head ?' Taemin spoke with a sweet calm voice that caught Jongin a bit off guard and so did the question.
'Ah eh- what ?' he felt dumb.
'Your head, you know it hit the floor.' Taemin said and Jongin touched his head.
'Oh yeah well it's just fine, I was dizzy for a while but it felt better the next day, thanks.' he said and smiled.
Before he had any chance to say something else or even finish the last syllabel Taemin spoke again.
'Is that the reason you kissed me ?' he said and Jongin dropped his chopsticks and he was probably looking pretty much like a tomato within the next couple of minutes.
'I- you- I'm- what ?!...Yes !' Jongin couldn't believe he said yes when his whole being was protesting.
'Well I- wait what ?!' Taemin's face suddenly looked extremely confused and it seemed like he had expected Jongin to answer differently, Jongin took this as his oppartunity to change his answer.
'I mean no! No ! I uh...no.' Jongin waved his hands infront of himslef trying to emphasize the no. He shook his head and sighed.
'Do you hate me ?' he blurted out.
'Why, what are you saying ?!' Taemin was starting to panic, this conversation wasn't making any sense. But judging by the look on Jongin's face he appeared to be just as clueless as Taemin was.
'I'm so sorry !' Jongin said and looked down.
Taemin didn't even know what to say or do so he just sat there staring at the younger boy in front of him. Jongin sighed...still looking down.
'Jongin-ah why did you do it ?' Taemin's voice sounded soft and tired.
'Because I have feelings for you...' Jongin said very slowly.
Taemin felt his cheeks get flushed and he wasn't sure if he should say anything. Since he didn't Jongin continued talking, still looking down.
'But I just want to be what we are.' he finally looked up but Taemin turned his head away this time.
What was that supposed to mean...Taemin didn't know and he suddenly felt dissapointed. "...what we are." And what was that ? Bestfriends with a onesided love from his side. The words hit Taemin so hard in his head, he was in love ? He probably knew it all this time, ever since they kissed...but he had never admitted it before. Jongin was one of the few good people he had close to him. As they sat there in Jongin's parents dinner room he was struck by heart break. The worst kind of heart break, the one sided love...
'Taemin-ah ?' Jongin said with worry in his voice.
Taemin kept staring out the window to their left."...I just want to be what we are.", "...just..." Taemin felt like crying or throwing up but he took a deep breath. How could anything possibly ever in this world happen between him and Jongin ? It's not like they could live quietly with it, they were stars now...not just kids.
'Perfect.' he smiled at Jongin, died on the inside. Jongin had feelings for him...but obviously not that kind of feelings.
Taemin's voice was made of ice or possibly stones. Jongin stared at his friend. His personality just made a 180. Did he say something wrong ? Did Taemin not want them to continue being friends ? Jongin felt his heart drop to his stomach. Was this really happening ? This was exactly what he had thought would be the worst possible outcome...breaking the friendship. Jongin could live with not telling Taemin about his real feelings but he didn't know what to do completely without him.
'I'm sorry.' his voice much more calm then his thoughts. Had he seriously screwed up his friendship over a kiss. He just wanted to take it all back...he wanted to go back to just watching Taemin from afar...
'Don't be.' Taemin's face barely moved.
'I have a schedule tomorrow, I must go...sorry.' Taemin stood up and looked at him.
'Oh ?...Well...' Jongin couldn't look at Taemin, he just wanted to die at this moment.
Taemin walked back to the door and got his stuff. Jongin finally stood up and followed him, opening the door.
'Well, bye then.' Taemin was about to turn around.
Jongin's hands moved without a thought and he pulled Taemin close to him. He held him tightly and turned his face to Taemin's hair, breathing in his smell again.
'Just don't go with the werewolfes.' he said.
The tears were falling now, Jongin was holding him just like he normally would but everything was different now. Taemin moved his arms around Jongin's waist. He felt like it was the last time he would do so.
'There are no werewolfs, babo.' he whispered. His voice failed him but he didn't care now.
'Ofcourse there are.' Jongin mumbled.
Taemin didn't know who parted first but suddenly they were sliding apart from each other. Taemin wanted to hold on but he knew he couldn't. He fired a last smile at Jongin before he walked out of the house. He didn't look back...he looked up at the moon.
Ok I'm sorry this chapter is so moody but my writing always macthes my own mood. T.T I was gonna write it really happy at first but then...so much sadness haha. ._. They're totally misreading each others feelings now. D: I feel so sryy for both of them after writing this but especially for Kai omg poor boy was so excited haha. Mianhe oppa... And oh sorry for forever being the slowest author. Enjoy anyway ! ^^)