Clothes. I have to find my clothes.

Jongin is peacefully breathing in a deep sleep beside me. He is so close. His arm is stretched, laid over my waist while his whole body is pasted on my back. I can feel his hot breath on my ear. I can feel the steady pumping of his chest against my spine. I must admit our position is a little embarrassing, yielded more because both of us are still , and Jongin is wonderfully warm against my skin.

Bethinking of what we did a few hours ago laves my whole face to grow hot. I’m not too confident of the fact that we shared an intimate deed which is really beyond our boundaries, but… it gave me benevolent feelings that I couldn’t deny that I liked. It felt like I bind with Jongin, like for the very first time, I was the one he belonged.

I regret nothing of it. It’s the most wonderful thing that I have ever experienced in my life; a combined moment of pain, happiness, passion and frustration with the man I love the most. Jongin kissed me with care, he touched me reverentially, and I know I cannot steal my heart back from him anymore. He already has it, even from the start.

Now I’m forgetting that I got to find my clothes.

I’m aware that it’s already long passed midnight. From a small line from the curtains, I can see the sky turning into dark indigo, and in a while, it will fully be morning. I just find this strong embarassing feeling if he sees me as this by the daylight. I’m not really confident with my body. I’m not as hot as my sister and I'm a bit chubbier, so making Jongin see me clearly would be totally discomforting.

I carefully try to move away from him. Slowly, I crane sideways to scan for my clothes on the floor. I stretch farther, but then, unexpectedly, Jongin pulls my arm back.

"Where do you think you’re going?" He groans with a threat, stirring awake. I blanch as he twists me flat on the bed. He stares at me with an angry pout, locking my hands with security.

"I-I'm j-just… going to pick my clothes—" I stammer.

"Why would you pick your clothes??"

"B-Because.. I'm a little u-uncomfortable.." I say shyly, trying to look away.

Jongin's eyebrow rises. Suddenly he is smirking wickedly at me. His eyes are playful as he stares at my face. My heart picks up speed. Jongin moves his eyes downwards and stares at my body under the sheets. I slap my palms on my flushing face, embarassed of his teasing intentions. Jongin chuckles lightly.

"You're so cute." He says.

I groan as Jongin tries to peel my hands off of my face. I wobble around. I'm too abashed to meet his eyes. He laughs louder.

The sky is turning into a lighter shade as I take a quick peek. I start to grow skittish and I glide under the sheets and cover myself entirely. Jongin squirms and sinks heavily on the bed, grabbing me swiftly by the waists. I yelp, and suddenly Jongin is on my face, smiling at me.

My heart leaps from his tantalizing eyes. He is shooting me a cute look.

He presses me closer and I squeeze inside his embrace. His bodyheat is overwhelming. We are just facing each other, blinking slowly, staring. His smile never leaves his lips, and it’s melting my shyness away.

"What are you thinking?" He asks.

"You." I say honestly, but Jongin just chuckles as if I attempted to be cheesy.

He nuzzles his nose to mine. I feel a tickle of electricity traveling down my feet. The sun is already radiating bright, and I slowly marvel over the view of Jongin's morning face. He is one beautiful man.

"I'm still sleepy..." He whispers, his eyes asking for permission.

I smile, and I lift my hand to brush his shiny hair. It’s really soft against my fingers. His full face is then again exposed for my eyes to devour. I really like every feature of his face, and I still wouldn’t relent to say that this man is a demigod.

Jongin blinks sluggishly, like a baby slowly conceding to sleep. I just watch him, and my heart dances atop the waves. He leans over to give me a quick kiss on the lips before backing contentedly to close his eyes and sleep. Of course I’m flushing again, and I’m glad he can’t see it.

If only we can stay like this forever.

*

I haven’t tracked how long I’ve been staring at Jongin but it must have been more than an hour. I feel completely stupid for memorizing his face and still feel not sated. He looks really innocent when he sleeps, and still look inexplicably hot at the same time. I’ve memorized the little cracks in his plump lips, the bridge of his nose, the length of his eyelashes, even the shape of his eyebrows that I never noticed before.

When it has gone bright outside, I carefully slip from Jongin's arms and tiptoe to search for my clothes. I've found my underwear, but I can’t find my top. As I search around, I spot my shirt underneath Jongin's calf, and if I tug it he'll surely wake. I don’t want to ruin his dreamful sleep so I simply borrow his t-shirt which is lying loosely on the floor and let myself as is.

I go out of his room and walk around the lounge. The DVDs he took the night we watched a movie are still sprawled messily under his TV.  I chuckle lightly as I remember how we left it. Above a small divider, I see a small picture frame of Jongin, Taemin, and Sulli. They’re probably like twelve year olds in the photo and their heights were still even. Jongin was so cute; his cheeks were a bit fat and squishy. A smile creeps up my lips as I adore the little form of Jongin smiling with so much carefree. Sulli was draping an arm around Jongin's neck as her other hand was clasping Taemin's hand. Even in a simple photograph, anyone can easily discern that Taemin and Sulli have something different, something specially warm. I still wonder how Jongin felt about it.

My stomach suddenly grumbles. I rub my stomach as I trudge to the kitchen. Opening Jongin's jam-packed refrigerator, I take a box of chocolate-filled crackers and stick one in between my lips. I stare at Jongin's door and think of cooking him breakfast, so I grab a pack of hotdogs and a couple of eggs and a loaf of bread before closing the fridge.

I'll be serving him an American-styled breakfast. I smile stupidly as I grab a frying pan. Melting the butter in an adequate heat, I crack and fry a sunny-side-up egg. After that, I start to fry the hotdogs and prepare the table all at once.

But in a loud clatter, the door of Jongin’s room suddenly breaks open and Jongin bolts from it with a desperate speed. I stare at him stupidly and he skids like he was struck by a lightning when he sees me. Panic and terror is written all over his face. His chest is rising and falling. His eyes are wide as he gives me a gaze poured with worry and longing. I’m a little confused with the expression he’s basking me, but I just curl my lips to a smile. As if his state of earth smashes back, Jongin makes his way towards me.

"Are you okay?" I ask.

Jongin pouts and looks down. "Y-Yeah, I j-just thought... you left me.."

I narrow my eyes at him, trying to read the perplexing tremble in his eyes. Jongin sighs before biting his lower lip. How can he act cute unknowingly? I am melting inside.

"What are you doing?"

"Cooking us breakfast.." I say, as if it isn’t obvious enough.

Jongin becomes silent as he slowly snakes his arms around my waists and hugs me from the back. He sinks his face on my shoulder and presses himself closer, inhaling me. I shiver a little, but I actually feel fluffy with his warmth.

"You look good in my shirt," He whispers ily on my ear. I become red in an instant as I feel goosebumps spreading on my skin.

"I uh, I-I'm sorry,” I stammer, “I just don’t want to wake you so I—"

Jongin cuts me off with a resounding chuckle. I blink awkwardly, then I twist the stove off. Using this as an excuse to hide my apparent flush, I place the hotdogs over a plate, and act like I didnt get by his voice.

But