“I used to be proud of red and ripe
Rained by thorns, burned by fire, crushed by mountain stone
The flakes scattered here and there
then gathered into your hand
only to be blown out with the wind”​

Dawn broke the gloomy night with crowing roosters began to sing a morning greeting throughout Jonseong sky, which wasn’t much to do toward the sleepers of the night. For those who weren’t aware that their emperor had been out of the palace, leaving his throne in order to find the royal first lady. The king and his royal bodyguards had arrived in front of Petal house. He stared at the name plank of the building, set his jaw hard as the thought that he just put down his pride and mightiness. Along the way before he got to the place, he kept telling himself to not let his emotion clouded his sense. Yet it didn’t give up to fail him for thinking his wife had an affair with a gisaeng. Why he was standing there and why he was clenching his fists, it didn’t matter. As a king, it’s his duty to protect royal dignity. He didn’t want to think furthermore than that.

“Inform the owner about our arrival” Kyuhyun told Officer Jungshin.

“Yes, Phea” The officer answered then walked forward to move the knocker, but the King stopped him “Wait!!”. Officer Jungshin stopped then turned back to the King.

“Just kick the gate off. We don’t have much time” Kyuhyun ordered. The officer agreed without doubt, asked his fellow royal bodyguards to help him to open the gate forcibly. The commotion soon brought some gisaengs of the house woken up from their sleep and their lampion. Soon after, an angry Hyoyeon showed up along with Jiyeon and Soyeon, rolling their own sleeves together and ready to fight with bat mattress, broom, spatula, and frying pan as though they had been used to it.

“These loan sharks never learned. I TOLD YOU WE DON’T NEED YOUR MON—“ Hyoyeon stopped her wrath in an instant as her eyes identified the people who just entered Petal House’s front yard. Her eyes widened in surprise and her breath choked in . She quickly threw out the bat mattress then landed on her knees to show her respect and apology. Jiyeon and Soyeon were dumbfounded with Hyoyeon’s sudden act “Unnie, why do you...”

“What are you doing? Hurry! Kneel with me!!!” Hyoyeon warned.

“Who are they?” Soyeon added.

Hyoyeon didn’t answer and greeted Kyuhyun instead “Phe...Phea, what... what kind of occasion that bring you to come to a place like this?”

They did what Hyoyeon commanded, though they couldn’t think any possible reason why the king visited a gisaeng house.

“Is Queen Min here?”

Hyoyeon gulped, her hands were trembling. She didn’t see the king directly but she could feel the sharp stare he was trhowing at her ”Tha—That..”

“Tell me the truth. Where are Queen Min and Lady Heehee?”

Hyoyeon couldn’t utter any word. She knew it would cost her life if she didn’t choose any proper words as a reply. But that worry soon left as she heard Heechul’s voice from behind.

“What such a commotion that disturb my beauty sleep?”

Hyoyeon raised her head and turned to her master “Heenim! Are you still drunk? It’s the king majesty!!” Hyoyeon warned with a low voice.

The transvestite gisaeng smirked slightly then turned his eyes toward the king. The exchange glances between them was hung in silent for seconds, but everyone who’s present could feel the tense. Hyoyeon couldn’t stop to mumble ‘we are damned, we are gonna die’ many times as she noticed how disrespectful Heechul was, —especially the way he dressed, and the King’s changed expression after he met Heechul’s eyes as if he threw daggers toward the gisaeng.

“Kids, go inside and leave us alone” Heechul commanded. Hyoyeon was remained unmoved, that Jiyeon and Soyeon had to drag her into the house.

After they left, Heechul unsteadily walked down from the terrace. The gisaeng didn’t come with his night robe, still wearing his former hanbok. But this time his hair was ravelled down, with long fringe covered a half of his right eye and a tiny pigtail at the back of his hair. The left side of his hanbok collar slackened off his shoulder blade, revealing his smooth milky white skin. And not to forget the plump red lip of his which was enough to make all the royal bodyguards gawked and addressed it as a temptation before his disrespectful behavior. Even officer Jungshin who was aware of Heechul’s real gender felt so. Except the king.

“Are you still in your sense, Kim Heechul?”

Heechul smiled then knelt himself before the King “My highest respect for you, Phea. You shouldn’t have set your feet to a lowest place like this”

Kyuhyun scoffed “you’re quite clever for a gisaeng, Kim Heechul. I am impressed. If you said ‘at your service’, I would have killed you on the spot”

“Your kindness is immeasurable, Phea. My deep apologies to present myself like this” Heechul replied. Eyes were still staring to the ground.

“Just cut off your sweet talk. Raise your head and tell me where Queen Min is”

~~~~#*SJ*#~~~~

At Hanyang forest, Sunkyu along with Officer Jinki and some of Lee Family’s soldiers had arrived at the resting house.

Slap !!!

“What do you mean she is disappeared?!!”

His face was thrown to his side as an impact from the hard slap. He was unmoved for a moment, trying to forget the pain then turned to face back the petite woman in front of him. Although the incident probably pained his pride as a swordsman to get slapped in front of everyone like that. But it’s not the sole problem, he conceded himself.

“I am sorry, Sunkyu. I was careless”

“Sorry is not enough!!”

“It’s not Chief Siwon’s fault, Courtlady Sunkyu. (Hiks)..... It’s my fault to fall asleep and let Queen Min left” Sulli cried and tried to defend Siwon in front of the courtlady.

“You don’t have right to speak your mind here, Sulli. I shouldn’t hire a kid like you from the first place. You’re useless” Sunkyu glared.

“Hey, Sunsun. You shouldn’t say something like that. She has tried her best so far” Donghae tried to defend Sulli.

“What is he doing here?!!” Sunkyu snapped.

“He helped us. If it were not him, I couldn’t kill all of those assassins” Siwon explained.

“How could you guarantee that all of those paid assassins are dead? How if any of them were alive and kidnapped Queen Min while you’re asleep?!!” Sunkyu turned to Sulli with glare again.

“No. I am sure she went alone by herself” Donghae stated.

 “What?” Sunkyu sound disbelief.

“Yes. I can smell it. No one came in the house except Sung... I mean Queen Min and Miss Sulli” Donghae explained which made Sunkyu scoffed.

“Now do you have any idea where Queen Min possibly goes to?” Siwon asked.

Sunkyu turned to face him and let out a sigh. Her temper seemed to be calmer “Let’s start with Petal house first”

~~~~#*SJ*#~~~~

Back to the Petal House. King Cho and his royal bodyguards had left the place, but Heechul was still on his knees, eyes were staring at the opened gate in silent. No one knew what he was thinking except God and himself.

Jiyeon and Soyeon run to him “Heenim, what’s actually happened?”. The said gisaeng remained silent. At other side, Hyoyeon kept walking back and forth certainly looked nervous by the way she was fidgeting her fingers and sometimes shook her own hair “... Cursed. This house is cursed. Is this because we have a crazy master?” she muttered.

Then a light chuckle was heard from Heechul. The three gisaengs looked at him.

“That brat treated me as a man”

Both Jiyeon and Soyeon knitted their eye brows. “Brat? Who do you mean, Heenim?” Jiyeon asked, being clueless. Only Hyoyeon who seemed understand to whom Heechul’s words meant to. The gisaeng was stunned with hung open. Her master was no doubt only one existed in this world. Her eyes were filled with fear “B—Brat? He called the king of this country with ‘Brat’. He is not human. I have to get salt... salt....” said her then turned around, meant to run to the kitchen.

“Salt? Why do you need that?” Jiyeon asked.

“He is possessed!!! There is an evil ghost in this house for sure!!” Hyoyeon shouted. Jiyeon meant to follow her but stopped as Heechul stood up “Heenim?”

“My body is ached. Can you prepare some warm water?” He asked Soyeon. The girl just nodded although she had many questions in mind then proceeded to go to the kitchen. Hyoyeon, like in a split second, had arrived back to the terrace with a bowlful of salt. Unluckily the bowl fell to the floor as she saw the second visitors came to Petal House.

“Hueeeeng.... I haven’t flushed him with salt yet” She cried and fell on her knees. Jiyeon approached her in worry.

Heechul turned around and saw Sunkyu and the others coming. He rolled his eyes and scoffed “What again... Do I have to repeat the same words? She is not here!!”

Sunkyu frowned “What?”

“What happen to you? You’re in mess” Donghae commented.

“I don’t think you royalties have a need to come here anymore. The King majesty had come here before you. I had explained everything” Heechul folded his arms.

“King Cho did?”

Heechul shrugged “Yes. He asked me where was his wife. I told him she was barely five minutes here last night then left. I didn’t know where she went to after that. (Sigh).... I have something else to do now. You can go” he unfolded his arms then bowed 90⁰ in front of Sunkyu and the others then turning around to leave. Sunkyu stopped him and pulled the gisaeng’s arm to face her.

“I haven’t done with you, Kim Heechul. I don’t think I deserve getting your rude behavior but I can put it aside for now. What did you say to Queen Min last night? I heard she cried” Sunkyu wanted a confirmation about what Sulli told her on their way to get there.

“I think I told her what you wished for, Sunkyu-shi. I told her who exactly I am and reminded her the fact that she is an empress while I am just a dirt below her shining shoes. Then she left. Just like that”

Slap!!!

The courtlady landed her hand to the gisaeng’s cheek pretty hard “How dare you a low life speaking about Queen Min like that”

“Heenim! Are you okay?” Jiyeon approached him, noticing the bruise that slightly appeared on the corner of his lip. But Heechul prevented her to get closer “It’s okay, Jiyeon. The slap Queen Min gave me last night is more hurt than this. Kkkkk....” He chuckled while touching his lip. He glanced at Sunkyu. He continued to provoke her “Yes. She hit me and said I was disgusting after seeing me with another gisaeng having an oral ”

Everyone except Heechul was looking at him with widened eyes. Siwon couldn’t hold his cool anymore thus he grabbed Heechul by clothes and pulled him closer “You’ve crossed the line, Kim Heechul. Do you want do die?!!” He growled

“GO AHEAD!! KILL ME!! My life may not worth even 1 Nyang in your pocket. You royalties always think so high and mighty to toy on people’s life. I think you all owe me apologies for lying to me and putting me in prison. Ah.... right I forgot... a low life like me don’t deserve any apology from you and you can treat me like a clown in Gyeongbok palace ANYTIME!!” Heechul shouted his mind. He finally spoke everything that bother him since he had been released from prison. When Siwon’s grab on him was loosened a bit, he removed his hands out from him and pushed him back.

“Is this the real you, Kim Heechul?” Sunkyu asked. Heechul turned to face her.

“I thought wrong about you. After all she did for you. You didn’t deserve to be linked with her even in your afterlife” Her tone was a clear evidence of how disappointed she was toward the gisaeng.

 “I may be what people called a shame of society but I never fool anyone like your queen” Heechul stated. The atmosphere seemed to reach its peak as Siwon meant to lauch his fist toward the gisaeng’s face, but someone else already punched him hard, making the gisaeng thrown back to the ground.

“Donghae!!!” Hyoyeon screamed a shock. Of all people she didn’t expect Donghae would do that to Heechul.

“Have you awaken? You’re such an , Hyung” Donghae said. Heechul wiped the blood from his nose then looked up to the younger.

“Do you know that Queen Min got attacked by some assassins last night? If there were not me and Siwon, she might be killed already. Everyone is worried and looking for her but you’re here acting like a crybaby”

Siwon came to Sunkyu “Let’s leave this place, Sunkyu. We can’t waste any more time than this”

“Yes, you’re right” Sunkyu looked at Heechul for a second then turned to find Sulli “Let’s go Sulli” Sunkyu ordered the other courtlady to follow her and joined the other Lee family’s soldiers who had been waiting outside. As they just reached the front gate, Sunkyu paused.  She bit her lower lip. There was something she hadn’t told him yet. Her mind was debating whether she should said it or not for a moment.

“Sunkyu?” Siwon called.

Sunkyu turned around and looked at Heechul. Her eyes looked wet, her lip started trembling “I DISLIKE YOU SO MUCH, KIM HEECHUL !!!”

“I've always been beside her for most of my life but never I could make her smile like you did. I never could comfort her whenever she felt sad because her grieve over her brother and one side love toward her husband, but you could do so even without trying. I adore her for her brave, toughness, and strong-will but you turned her into a human with weakness. Don’t you dare speaking about ranking status between you and her. You only think about yourself, how low you are in front of her. You don’t think at all about how much she has jumped from her high status to reach you !!!” Sunkyu shouted in tears. Sulli who stood beside her also couldn’t hold her tears as she thought she just heard a true story of the queen of Jonseong.

Meanwhile Heechul was only stunned. Remained unmoved from his former position. His mind kept asking if his eyes were deceiving him, if all what he just heard were true. The tough and rude Sunkyu he knew before was crying her heart out.

The courtlady had not done yet. She continued “Let me tell you what I saw... Being friend with you, It's like she was in a dream and seeing things that only in a dream. Feeling things that she can only dream about. But now you put her away. If it would be ended like this, I should have prevented both of you to meet from beginning” She wiped her tears then turned around and left.

Heechul quietly watched their back passing the gate. He stood up then walked back inside the gisaeng house.

“Hyung, you should find her too” Donghae spoke from behind.

Heechul stopped. Without turning back, he told the younger “Why should I? Didn’t you say you and Siwon saved her earlier? Then it’s your fault she disappeared”

“It’s—“

Hyoyeon interrupted “Sulli-shi said Queen Min went alone while she fell asleep at a rest house in the forest, Heenim” she told him in worry.

Heechul became silent for a moment. Everyone expected his answer but instead he said “Get out from my house, Donghae! I don’t want to see your face anymore. Hyoyeon, please prepare my best clothes and gayageum” the gisaeng ordered his assistant.

“Huh? Where do you want to go?”

“Stupid. Do you forget what day is this? Of course playing music at my favourite place”

“Heenim!! The water is ready— Hkkkkkk!!!.... What happened with your face?” Soyeon ,who had no idea with what just happened, was looked shock with Heechul’s appearance. The gisaeng pushed her forehead with a finger “Don’t ask or you will get damned” he said before passing her then disappeared from everyone’s sight.

“What a heartless human” Hyoyeon commented. Jiyeon –who had been cried since hearing what Sunkyu said to Heechul earlier—, nodded “Yes, how he could do that to Queen Min...... Huh? Wait! Miss Sungmin is Queen Min? And she came here last night?!!”

Hyoyeon stared at her with mouth hung open “This house is sure damned, been filled with stupid people. I am amazed”

“He will be looking for her” Donghae spoke out of a blue

“Who??”  Hyoyeon and Jiyeon said at the same time.

“Heechul hyung”

“Are you deaf? He said he wanted to go play” Hyoyeon argued

Donghae shook his head. A smile drown on his lip while staring invisible at the doorway “No. I am sure he will”

~~~~#*SJ*#~~~~

“Phea!” Jungshin and Changmin walked toward the king then bowed their head. Kyuhyun averted his eyes from a quite number of mysterious corpses spread on the ground he and his royal bodyguards just found in Hanyang forest, brutally killed. Some of them even sprawled without heads “Anyone survives?” Kyuhyun asked the officers.

“No, Phea. They are all dead. Looking from their clothes, I think they are the paid assassins that Eunuch Kang had told us before” Changmin reported.

Jungshin then added “What should we do Phea? Should I report to the main headquarters about this? There is no sign of Queen Min either, I am afraid something bad happen to he— Aww!!“ Changmin patted his head pretty hard and scolded him “Don’t say anything that could bring misfortune, idiot!! All of them are dead. It means there was someone who had defeated all of them”

Later, officer Jonghyun ran breathlessly to join them. “Phea, (pant)…(pant)… I hear the sound of horses running toward here”. Kyuhyun and the rest of royal bodyguards became alert and held their sword handle. Ready to fight as the horse riders showed up into their sight. But the tense was soon loosened as they recognized who were just coming. Prince Yesung and his followers.

“Hyung!!!!”

Prince Yesung climbed down his horse, followed by Hangeng, Jongjin, and Sungjin. “Phea, please let us to help you” he said before bowing his head toward Kyuhyun.

“Thanks, Hyung” Kyuhyun smiled to his brother. “I am sorry for being impudent, Phea. I heard you went to Petal house to find Queen Min” Hangeng spoke up.

Kyuhyun sighed and shook his head “She is not there” he said as recalling again his conversation with Heechul that morning.

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Flashback

***********

“Just cut off your sweet talk. Raise your head and tell me where Queen Min is” Kyuhyun questioned the gisaeng. Some of his royal bodyguards were split around to search Queen Min inside the house.

“I don’t know where she is, Phea. Does she suppose to be back in her pavilion? She came here barely 5 minutes then left in the midnight. “

Kyuhyun scoffed “Do you think I would believe what you said?”

“It’s up to you, Phea. I know my opinion doesn’t matter to you but I am speaking the truth. What happe—”

“What did you two talked about?” Kyuhyun cut off coldly.

Heechul took a breath, put aside his own curiosity at the moment “I think she really hate me now, after she realized what kind of dirty work I did every night. Just in 5 minutes, she cut our tie. Isn’t it for this purpose about the reason why you invited me to Gyeongbok Palace from the first place, Phea?”

Kyuhyun suddenly drew his sword and placed it before Heechul’s neck “I think you should be aware that you could lose your life anytime because of your blabber mouth, Kim Heechul” he said with full anger in his eyes.

“I have nothing to lose. If there is no truth between my words, I will give up my life under your punishment” Heechul slowly closed his eyes and accepted it if the cold iron would slash his neck.

A pregnant silent was hung in the air for seconds. Then Heechul heard a sound of sword had been placed back to its scabbard.

“Are you mad at me, Kim Heechul?”

Heechul opened his eyes and looked at the King “What right do I have, Phea? You did the right thing as a King. Protecting your Queen’s dignity.  Eventhough I am like this, I know my position. And I feel so relieved now.  It’s my worst sin to make her shed tears like that but it was worth it rather than to risk her life and throne because of a gisaeng like me—”

“What did you just say?” Kyuhyun’s eyes grew bigger and clenched his hands. Of all those words Heechul just said, there was a certain word that quite provoked him.

“Phea!!! She is not here” Officer Jungshin and the others exited the house.

Kyuhyun exhaled a heavy sigh, still staring daggers to Heechul. There’s still many questions in his mind but he didn’t have anymore time at the moment “I hope you will keep those words of yours in your mind with every breath you breath, Kim Heechul”. Then he left with his royal bodyguards.

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

End of flashback

**************

“I will send some of royal bodyguards to block all the entrances of Hanyang and inspect everyone who want to pass. What do you think, Phea? Phea?” Yesung called Kyuhyun. The king flinched out from his own reverie “Ye..Yes? I… I think that’s a good idea, Hyung” he replied awkwardly.

“Do you have any place in mind where Queen Min may have been?’

Kyuhyun breathed in, thinking where the most possible place Sungmin might be. He glanced back to his brother and said “We will start with Sungmin’s parent graveyard”

~~~~#*SJ*#~~~~

+++++++++++++++++
Back to present time
=================

He wasn’t in his bedroom. He was standing in front of a large sunflower garden which's surrounding a small lake. Fully blooming at their season. Ginko trees lined up swung their leaves with green, red, brown, and yellow. The sight quite dazzled his eyes, needed sometimes to adapt. But he couldn’t deny the view was beyond beautiful. He was looking around and met a cave behind him which somehow seemed familiar. He was sure he never came to that place before. As he found a footpath, it rang a bell inside his mind. He followed the path and  started to get nervous. He knew where it would lead him. To a small wooden gazebo, the place where Queen Min and Lady Heehee had first met.

He huffed. It was starting again. The memories. He thought he had been fed up enough with all those crap. Although this time it was new. His previous dreams were usually colourless, and he never felt like he could walk in his dream like this. He found the gazebo. He expected a figure of Lady Heehee playing a Gayageum  instead of Queen Min who was sitting there, leaning her head on one of the gazebo’s pillar, and staring blankly toward the lake.

He approached her. It was like seeing a mirror if he missed the clothes and her hair. “What are you doing here? Are you hiding yourself?”. Queen Min didn’t reply nor she seemed to see Sungmin standing in front of her as if he was transparent. Sungmin could see clearly how her eyes were staring at the lake and filled with sadness.

Sungmin breathed in and out, mouth closed tight but there was storm of emotions whirling crazily inside his mind “Look at you. Ended like this. Have you regretted it now? Have you learned your lesson for the second time?” Sungmin spoke his mind. The last sentence was sound shaking. "You had been ignored by your husband for more than 10 years. Then you ignored him back as a shield so you wouldn’t feel hurt anymore. BRAVO!! THOUSAND KUDOS FOR YOU!!”he shouted at the queen.

He felt his eyes started to shed some tears. He rubbed them quickly, didn’t let them to disturb his rage. “But then you fell again in the same trap. Throwing your pride as a queen for a gisaeng. Now, look at you! Body parts here and there are starting to droop, your heart has long since become a flake of dusts…”

Queen Min began to stand up then walked toward the lakeside. Sungmin followed him “What are you doing? Are you going to kill yourself?”. Queen Min didn’t hear him, but Sungmin didn’t give up. He preceded the queen and stood up in front of her “Can you stop being so immature?!! GO BACK TO YOUR OLD SELF AND STOP COMING INTO MY DREAMS!!!” he screamed his heart out.

“Sungmin!”

Both of them turned around to see the person who just called their name. They were stunned as though the voice had sort of an effect on them.  That’s how their heart shrunk.

“Hhhhhk!!!!!” Sungmin jolted awake from his sleep. He sat up from his bed then saw his reflection in a mirror. His eyes were red and wet with tears. He wiped them away then buried his face in his hands.

“Damn….”

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P.S : Another boring chapter. YAY!!!! I know I shouldn't say sorry in every chapter since reader may be sick of it. But this is the longest time I've been away not updating. Therefore I am terribly sorry TT__TT. Many s happened during my MIA, I think all people who's in their twenties know what I mean, kekekekeke xD. I had read all your comments very well. I feel honored, thankful, and also sorry. Thanks for all of your feedback. I will reply them one by one starting tomorrow ^^.