Perfection of rose is actually on it’s thorns

Gyeongbok Royal Palace, Hanyang (Former name of Seoul), 1509

“Min Mama, King Cho has arrived”

Courtlady Sunkyu informed her behind the door.  The Queen who’s  previously just lying and crying because of what she saw last night quickly woke up and wiped her tears. A slight of smile surfaced on her lip.

“Say to him, please wait for a moment. I need to prepare. Tidy up a bit”

It had been years the King visited her by his own since they got married. She became queen when she’s only 15 years old but what she did almost was doing her job as Queen Myeongseong. As The Queen of Jonseong but not as King’s wife.

She reached 18 this year, not even once The King visited her place. She understood that royal council and fortune teller hadn’t found the right date for them to spend their first night. But It’s not what she really wanted. She just wanted to do simple things as Kyuhyun and Sungmin. But she knew it would never happened. Since Lady Seohyun met him first before her.

Then a voice from eunuch Kang was heard from outside “The King will come inside”.  Sound of three layer doors opened one by one. A tall figure showed up before her gracefully. A figure that she loved so much but never she had chances to express it toward the former. King Cho Kyuhyun.

She bowed to him and invited him to sit. Before a slight of hope was drawn on her face but when she raised her head and faced a cold expression from King, she knew that she’s just dreaming. Dreaming that finally the King had opened his heart to her. As she realized that the time she acted as Sungmin would  never  happen, she acted back as Queen Min. His official Queen.

“Phea¹, what make you come here suddenly? If you tell me earlier, I will prepare something more than this. Do you want me to  pour a cup of green tea for you?” She took  the teapot which placed on the table and started to pur it into a small ceramic cup.

But Kyuhyun didn’t answer her question instead “I heard from Eunuch Kang, you visited me last night”

She stunned in the middle of pouring green tea from it’s pot. Her hand’s trembling as she recalled what happened last night.

“What make you throw your pride as a woman visited me in a middle of night and what had you seen?”

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Flashback

***********

“Min Mama, I hear from our spy that King Cho invites Lady Seohyun to his chamber” Courtlady Sunkyu reported to her.

“What?!!! what does she do in the middle of night? Sunkyu, please dress me up”

“Min Mama, please. You can’t do that. You will scratch your pride if you go to the King’s chamber. Remember, you are Queen of Jonseong” Sunkyu begged her.

But Sungmin didn’t care “No. I said dress me up! I will go there”. Sunkyu shook her head signed that she opposed her decision. Sungmin stood up “Find, I will do it myself” and walked to her drawer.

Sunkyu walked before her  and spread her both hand to prevent Sungmin passed her “No. You should think before act just like you always did, Min Mama”

“Sunkyu, let me pass!!” she yelled at her. Her lip trembling because of anger. She bit her lower lip to stop the trembling. Sunkyu noticed it because it was Sungmin's habit to be looked strong.

There were a pregnant silence for a moment. Sungmin sighed. She looked a bit calmer than before. “Sunkyu, please let me go. As a friend. Please let me…”

Sunkyu’s eyes became a little bit wet to hear the word  friend from Sungmin. It’s been a while she called her by name informally since she became a crown princess. But Sungmin’s words made she wanted to protect her Queen even more. Maybe Queen Min was well known as an arrogant Queen who would do everything to achieve her goal and also never hesitate to kill anyone who against her. But one thing that made Sunkyu kept loyal toward her. She treated her followers like her own body.

“Agashi², please !! This is for own good”

“Sunkyu, let me go or I will suicide right now!!! “ Sungmin yelled at her. That time, she really didn’t care about her position as Queen or her pride as a Jonseong woman.

Sunkyu finally gave up “Fine, but let me tag you along”

She arrived to King’s Quarters. She could see that eunuch Kang was sweating when he saw her. It’s obvious that he hid something.

“Please report to the King that I come” she said and tried to sound calmly.

Eunuch Kang answered with stuttered voice “He... He… is mm.. meeting with a guest, Min Mama”

“with who?”

Eunuch Kang kept silence, tried to find a logic reason to explain to her. But once again, she lost her control. Before eunuch Kang said something, she rushed to the King’s chamber and opened the doors layer by layer. But at the last layer, she paused.

“I want to protect you” She heard the King’s voice. Kyuhyun voice. And followed by a female voice “Phea…” 

She was really sure that the owner voice was Lady Seohyun. She opened a bit and took a peek inside. She was shocked to watch the scene in front of her. She saw Kyuhyun and Lady Seohyun was sitting opposite toward each other in King’s chamber.

She wanted to convince herself that what she witnessed later was only her imagination. Her body’s trembling. She felt being betrayed. She turned around and rushed back to outside. When she passed the first door and faced eunuch Kang with head still bowed down and looked guilty. She glared at him. She wanted to throw her angers toward him but she had no logical reason to do so.

“Min Mama, what happen?” Sunkyu asked.

“Let’s go back. Sunkyu”

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End of Flashback

****************

“I worried about your health, Phea. For me, your health is the most important” Sungmin said calmly.

Kyuhyun chuckled “Should I say thank you then? To have a Queen who will sacrifice her pride to come to my quarter in a middle of night because of worrying about my health?”

Sungmin lifted  her head. Their eyes met each other  “I am your wife. I am the first lady of Jonseong. It’s my job to take care the King”

“What did you see last night?” Kyuhyun asked.

Sungmin was remained silent “I didn’t see anything. I will forget it if you want me to do so”

“Tell me what do you want, Sungmin? I know you” He said coldly. There will be always some tensed atmosphere between them.

Sungmin smiled “Just tell me if you want a concubine, Phea”

Kyuhyun laughed this time “Hahaha…  Do you really mean it my Queen? You must watch your own reflection in a mirror so you can see how a hypocrite person you are”

By the time, Kyuhyun stopped his laugh and took a glance for a moment to his queen who still smiled toward him “I always treat you like this. Why do you keep giving me smile like that?”

Sungmin’s expression didn’t change at all. But if you watched closer, you would see her hand trembling and grabbing the low part of her dress strongly. She needed to smile to prevent the King could see through her. This one thing was the only remaining  pride she has as a woman toward the King. As Lee Sungmin.

She took a moment to let out a low but long breath then she faced her husband again “Phea, what's your actual reason to come here? Like I said before, I didn’t see anything if you want me to do so”

As he heard that from Sungmin, he felt like she was coming back to her arrogant state again. This wasn’t about he visited to investigate her anymore but another thing “As a payback what do you want from me?”

Sungmin remained silence. Kyuhyun hit the table before him with his right hand and made her a bit startled. He stood up. “it’s useless” he mumbled. When he turned around and ready to head back, Sungmin said something that he wouldn’t  expected to come out from her.

“I love you, Phea”

Kyuhyun paused for a moment. He broke the silence with cold words “And you know I won’t…. Min” then walked out and left her alone.

She watched his back. She knew that already since 10 years ago that the King’s love would have never been hers. Actually, instead of those three cheesy words, she wanted to say another thing to him. But she couldn’t bear a certain consequence if she let that thing out.

‘I want to say that just once I want  you to treat me as your wife.  But I am afraid if you fulfill my wish, you will throw me away. That’s why I choose to stay beside you forever. Eventhough it would make me be a bad person’

********

A day later, Queen Min’s older brother, Deputy Minister Lee Eunhyuk came to visit her place.

Lee Eunhyuk had a quite important role as Lee Faction member. In Jonseong Empire, there were three biggest faction that ruled the Kingdom. They were Royal Family, Lee Faction, and Choi Faction. Since Lee Sungmin became Queen Myeongseong, Lee Faction got majority position in royal courts. If royal family ruled Jonseong in the light, then Lee Faction was just like the ruler of Jonseong in the shadow.

Sungmin clearly aware that her position resettled Lee Faction ambitions. That’s why she let folks and nobles assumed her as an Arrogant Queen. She need public’s fear to make them obeyed her.

“Orabuni³, It’s been a while since the last time I saw you. How have you been?” Sungmin looked very happy seeing her brother again.

“I am the one who should ask that, Min. Sunkyu told me that you barely eat these days” He showed his concern to his beloved sister.

“I am all right, orabuni. I just don’t have appetite now”

She smiled at him. For Lord Eunhyuk, his sister’s smile was so precious. He wondered why King Cho didn’t notice it “Did the King do something to you?”

Sungmin startled “Orabuni, please don’t say such thing here. Eventhough this is my chamber, you should know that walls have ears”

But Eunhyuk couldn’t help it “Sunkyu told me everything, Min. About King’s visit. Should I lend you my…?”

“Orabuni, please don’t act reckless” Sungmin looked so anxious. Not because worrying her position as Queen, but sometimes her brother actions might risk his own life. The latest he did was when he’s nearly being discovered as the mastermind of fire incident at the house of Lady Seohyun’s mother. If Sungmin didn’t quickly annihilate any evidences and witnesses, she wouldn’t have a brother anymore.

Sungmin tried to calm her brother “I have my own plan. Please just watch me. I am not that weak”

Eunhyuk sighed “Fine. I will obey you if I can watch you eat something right after this”. Finally, Sungmin gave up and ordered Sunkyu to bring foods.

*******

After seeing his sister, he bid a farewell then walked out from Queen’s pavilion. Before he reached the exit gate, he paused for a moment and said something to his assistant.

“Siwon-shi”

“Yes, Sir”

“Prepare some of our troops to get ready. Just in case….”

¹Phea : Your highness, Sire

²Agashi : Miss, Lady

³Orabuni : older brother, more polite than Oppa. The term wasn't used in modern era anymore