Chapter 6

Awkward

 

 

It doesn’t take long for Baekhyun to fall into his new routine.

Every day he talks to Jonghyun in choir. He really doesn’t want to jinx it, but… he sort of thinks they may actually befriends.

Thursday nights are spent with Jonghyun in the apartment he shares with his mother. Baekhyun really likes the Kim’s house. It’s sort of small but very chic and bright; the exact opposite of Chanyeol’s big house which is warm and cozy.

Friday nights are still spent at Chanyeol’s house, though Baekhyun notices that Chanyeol is always insistent on him bringing his Physics homework with him. They work on Baekhyun’s homework for a few hours, before Chanyeol declares that he’s tired and wants to go to bed. Only a couple weeks go by before Chanyeol tells Baekhyun he’s busy and can’t hang out for a while.

Apparently, Chanyeol is busier than ever. Baekhyun’s not sure what he’s doing, but he always mentions stuff about writing papers and testing new theories so Baekhyun just lets him, because to be honest, it means more time he can spend with Jonghyun without feeling guilty.

All of his friends are seemingly ignoring him. He wonders if they finally found about the fact that it was indeed his fault that Sehun’s bike was stolen, but that wouldn’t explain why everyone else is so mad at him, too. Even his lovable, squishy hyung Minseok is giving him the cold shoulder, and when Minseok’s mad, that means you’ve really ed up. The worst of all is Kai. Kai gives him looks. They all do, only Kai isn’t so discreet about it. He wonders what’s got Kai’s all twisted but he’s almost positive it has something to do with Chanyeol, because he’s been this way since the day he ranted at Baekhyun on the way to the bus stop.

Baekhyun’s just going to back off for a while. He’s been friend with Kai for a few years now, and they’ve never really fought like this. He figured it had to happen eventually.

He’s got more important matters to attend to, anyways. He’s become cooler around Jonghyun. At least… he thinks he has. There’s times when he’s sitting on Jonghyun’s bed, in Jonghyun’s room and all he really wants to do is cry and scream like a little girl. But he keeps his cool.

He can’t help it that the guy is so ing perfect. Really.  They’re the exact same height so Baekhyun doesn’t have to stand on his tiptoes to kiss him (if he ever kisses him, that is). He gets straight A’s and visits his aging grandma out in the country. He also knows that Jonghyun plays the piano and the guitar which means he’s good with his hands and, uhm… yeah.

Baekhyun can’t help it. He thinks about it. A lot. He’s a growing boy with needs and Kim Jonghyun smells so good and it makes him dizzy and it would be a complete lie to say he hadn’t thought about that. Alone. In his bed. At night.

Not that he’s going to jump the guy’s bones at the first given chance or anything. He’d rather die than have Jonghyun see him, all fumbling and awkward and 100% , because Jonghyun most definitely is not a and just the thought of it makes Baekhyun want to cry from the impending embarrassment.

But he’s thinking way too far ahead of himself. He doesn’t even know if Jonghyun likes him. He hopes and prays and makes wishes on eyelashes though, that he does.

Jonghyun is hard to read. He’s learned from watching Jonghyun around his friends that he loves skinship. He touches Baekhyun a lot, though Baekhyun doesn’t think he’s even aware of it. Jonghyun grabs his elbow when he gets a question right, ruffles his hair when he gets it wrong. Which is often. When Jonghyun said some people didn’t have math-oriented brains, he wasn’t joking, because Baekhyun is pretty positive if he sees one more matrix he’s going to lose it.

Still, Pre-Calculus (or the useless subject from hell, as he’s been calling lately) aside, spending time with Jonghyun has caused time to fly by. Before Baekhyun even knows it, a month has passed. Chanyeol is still practically MIA and is still backing out of their Friday nights together. Baekhyun’s not really worried, but he misses the kid. When he does catch of glimpse of him in the hallway, Chanyeol just assures him that he’s really busy and they’ll get together soon.

With Kai constantly shooting him dirty looks and Chanyeol having fallen off the face of the earth, Baekhyun has taken up semi-permanent residence at Jonghyun’s lunch table. After their disastrous first meeting, Baekhyun finds that he actually likes Jonghyun’s friends, with the exception of Kim Kibum, who is by far the most intimidating person he’s ever come across.

One day, Jinki even tells Baekhyun to invite Chanyeol to sit with them. Baekhyun coughs and sputters while four pairs of eyes shoot him curious glances. Baekhyun sees in his mind’s eye, Chanyeol sitting right between himself and Jinki, chatting away, telling one of his random stories and everyone laughing along. Then, the image shifts horribly and now he sees Chanyeol laughing in his weird way, with his eye twitching and clapping his hands like some demented seal and Kibum throwing harsh insults his way every two seconds.

Instead, he just shakes his head, declining politely. “He’s really busy these days,” Baekhyun says. “He keeps on spending the whole lunch period working on some paper. It must be a pretty big deal.”

“Really?” Jinki asks curiously, tilting his head. “Because a couple days ago, I saw him eating by himself outside the library. I figured that—“

“Wait,” Baekhyun’s chopsticks clatter to the table. “What did you say?”

Jinki blinks and stutters, like he’s not sure if he’s said something wrong or not, confused by Baekhyun’s reaction. “Uhm… I said… I saw him by the library the other day? Eating his lunch…”

“I’ll be right back,” he mutters, getting up from the table abruptly.  The whole table is stunned into silence as Baekhyun stomps away, and if it weren’t for the blood rushing in his ears, Baekhyun might have heard Kibum tell Jinki “Good job, sangtae. There he goes again.”

 

 

 

Baekhyun doesn’t even know what to think as he storms through the school’s hallway, making a beeline for the library. He’s never been a very rational person, and instead of calming down and actually processing the situation (yeah right, that’ll never happen), he practically races towards the East Wing.

“Yah! Park Chanyeol,” he calls out as soon as he rounds the corner. Sure enough, Chanyeol is there. He’s sitting against the wall across from the giant double doors that lead into the school’s library. His knees are drawn up to his chest and he’s balancing a small tray of kimbap on them. Even in his flurried state, Baekhyun wonders how Chanyeol can actually keep the tray in place with his knobby knees.

Chanyeol jerks his head up, obviously startled. His eyes are wide as he looks at Baekhyun, taking a minute for him to register that he’s actually there. When he finally notices that it’s Baekhyun, his jaw goes tense and he looks back down.

“What the hell are you doing?” Baekhyun asks, coming closer. Wordlessly, Chanyeol removes the kimbap from his knees, tossing it into his paper lunchbag. He brushes his hair from his face and Baekhyun notices that he’s not wearing his oversized brown glasses anymore. And that his eyes look very tired.

“Hey,” Baekhyun says, softly now, knowing that being harsh was never a way to deal with a moody Chanyeol. He steps so he’s right in front of him. “I said ‘What are you doing?”

Chanyeol shrugs and still doesn’t say anything. Instead he starts playing the drums on his knees with his wooden chopsticks, except two seconds in, he breaks them.

Baekhyun chuckles and seats himself on the floor so he’s right across from his best friend. Chanyeol brings his knees down and crosses his legs. Their knees are touching now.

“What’s going on, Yeol?” Baekhyun asks again as he watches Chanyeol’s fingers clench and unclench against his pants. Baekhyun recognizes this as one of Chanyeol’s many nervous habits. “Why have you been avoiding me?”

“I wasn’t!” Chanyeol insists right away. “I really have been busy. And you’ve been busy, too. So I thought—“

“There’s no paper, is there?” Baekhyun interrupts and Chanyeol freezes, giving him all the answer he needs. “Why are you—“

“Will you just let me live my life?” Chanyeol blurts out and Baekhyun blinks, not at all used to the tone his beset friend is using. “I wish you’d stop dictating to me how things are going to be, because sometimes things happen that I can’t control.”

Chanyeol’s face twists in a way that looks like he’s going to be sick. Baekhyun is still sitting dazed on the ground as Chanyeol hurriedly packs up his stuff, unfolds himself from the floor, and takes off down the hallway.

Baekhyun sits there in the hall, staring at the ugly green wall for a good five minutes. Now, he finally realizes that something is wrong. He’d never heard Chanyeol use that tone of voice, ever. He wracks his brain for any clues as to what could have been going on. Was his mom sick? Did his dad lose his job? He can’t think of anything, which must mean there’s something that Chanyeol’s not telling him.

Chanyeol’s words are replaying in his mind, over and over. And the way his voice hitched, almost in panic, when he said ‘Will you just let me live my life?

Baekhyun gasps as it finally hits him. “You either need to start being the friend that Chanyeol deserves or let him go off and live his own life.”

Now he knows why Chanyeol has been slowly backing away from him in these past few weeks, avoiding him and plain out ignoring him. He feels really hurt and betrayed all of a sudden, and the sheer force of the feelings leaves his stomach aching. He can’t believe Kai, one of his best friends, is trying to turn Chanyeol, his best friend (but that doesn’t seem strong enough word here), the person he cared about most in this world, save for his mother, against him.

Baekhyun had lived a fairly simple, drama-free live up until now.  He really just wants to give a big ‘ YOU’ to whoever it was that came up with the saying ‘When it rains, it pours’.

Because it’s pouring now. And Baekhyun’s caught without his 182 cm. umbrella. 

 



 

i can't even talk properly right now because i'm just so emotional. 

this is me rn. 

it's been such a crazy day. work was just full of 'wtf'ery and then that STUPID. SORRY SORRY. PERF. omg. and then i found out this story was FIC RECCED on tumblr and YOU GUYS KEEP SUBSCRIBING and i'm just over here, trying not to cry because I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH. 

i wish i could give all my subscribers a present. like. one by one. but i can't. so. if i ever see you in the street let me buy you bubble tea. ok? ok. 

oh hey. did you guys know this was supposed to be like a two-shot originally? 

... oops. 

anyways yeah so i'd like to write a side one-shot for what's been going on between kai and chanyeol but i'm not really sure if you guys are interested in that? it can kind of be derived already but. idk. let me know. ^_^

it really means a lot to me that you guys like this story. and you like how i write chanyeol! that is just really flattering because he's like one of my top biases and the fact that i can do him justice is just ldjfsndfg. 

so that's it. i'm just gonna go die in the corner now from the overwhelming emotions i feel. and as always, feel free to add my tumblr and talk to me. because it's nice when people talk to me. (▰˘◡˘▰)

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jinkirei
first chapter will probably maybe hopefully be up tonight~

Comments

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qinwang #1
thank youui
idk----
#2
thank you for the story!
Aezxmin
174 streak #3
Chapter 18: Ohhh another case of "miscommunication"

If you love someone, you have to say and prove it.
itzmeguyz
161 streak #4
Chapter 19: this is so beautiful... thank you >333
xiaonara
#5
Chapter 19: This story is beautiful im crying......