Friday was a sad day. The priest read a passage from his bible, his voice being drowned out slowly as we all stared at the casket in

front of us. You wore no expression, you just stood there frozen. Everything seemed to be in slow motion as the priest shut the holy

book, telling us it was time to lower the casket.

    You still didn’t move. I touched your shoulder and you looked at me, eyes filled with sadness. I looked at your dad, he was the first to

put down his rose. Everyone hesitated seeing that you hadn’t put yours down yet. I moved you aside, already knowing that you wanted

to be the last person. I nodded at them, telling them that it was okay.

    Days ago you found out that your mom had passed away. Since then you hardly even spoke let alone cried. I felt terrible that I couldn’t

do anything but just try to comfort you. Both my parents were still alive, so I had no idea what you were going through, I could only

imagine the pain.

    Hyunsik was the last person to put a flower on the lowered casket. Holding your hand, I walked with you towards the freshly dug

grave. I mentally spoke to her, telling her how much she would be missed. When I tossed in my flower I put my arm around your

shoulders as you continued to stare down.

    “I love you mom.”, you whispered. Your rose was different from everyone else’s. Placing a kiss on the white petals you squatted down

and gently laid it above the other red ones. Your father told everyone that there would be a small reception in the funeral home. They

slowly made their way over as he came to your other side. “Are you going to come inside sweetheart?” he asked quietly. You nodded

and held on to my hand tightly as we turned and followed the crowd.

    Inside I watched as Minah and Sohyun sat on either side of a sofa, your head in Sohyun‘s lap. She gently brushed your hair, still with

no expression you stared off into space. Eunkwang put his hand on my shoulder, “I hate not being able to do anything.” , I sighed,

“Seeing her like this kills me.” I plopped down on a chair and hung my head.

“Boys.” We all look up to see your dad, “Is it okay if I speak to Ilhoon alone?” They nodded, “Absolutely.” I stood up as they walked away,

“Is everything okay sir?” I asked. He sighed and removed his glasses, his small eyes red and puffy from the lack of sleep and crying. “I

want to give you something. Come with me.”

    I took a quick glance at you and saw that you hadn’t moved before following him. Outside he stopped under a tall oak tree and sighed,

not saying anything. I looked up at the trees, listening to the birds chirp. “You know, from the minute we met you we knew you would end

up with our daughter.” , he spoke. I looked at him, “Ilhoon, this past week has made me realize how short life is.”

    Your dad looked at your mother’s grave in the distance. “We talked about it so many times and if anything happens to me-” I grew

worried, “Sir, please don’t speak like that.” He chuckled, “Oh Ilhoon, this is why I’m certain of this decision.” I furrowed my brows as he

dug in his jacket pocket, pulling out a black velvet box.

    He put it in my hand, “Open it.”, he urged. I did so and squinted when the sunlight hit the diamond ring. I raised my brows, “Uhm…” I

looked at him. He smiled, “It was her mothers. It’s kind of a tradition with us, the father-in-law always gives the ring to the future son-in-

law.” He thought of me like that? I was speechless. “Ilhoon.” he put a hand on my shoulder, “I know that most people would think it’s

crazy to give this to you now since you’ve only been together for two years but, I feel good about you Ilhoon, I know that you’ll make her

happy.”

     I smiled, he was right. Since we’ve been together, whenever I thought of the future, you were always there. After this semester I kind

of wanted us to move in together but, I didn’t know how to ask you. “Thank you sir.” I closed my fist over the box and carefully placed it

on the inside jacket pocket. He nodded with a smile before excusing himself.

    As I walked back inside I saw that you were no longer on the sofa with the girls.

“Where is she?” I asked worried. Sohyun was looking out the window and pointed. “She said she was going to talk to her mom.” I looked

out as well as saw you sitting cross legged on the fresh dirt patch, facing the tombstone.

    I walked over quietly, stopping a few feet behind you. You didn’t say anything and drew shapeless patterns in the dirt. “I miss her.”,

you said, knowing I was already there. “I know, I know.” I sat down behind you and you leaned you head against my chest. As I held you

hand I noticed that it was shaking. “You don’t have to hold it in baby.”, I rubbed your shoulders, “It’s okay to cry…”

    Immediately you hunched over and hugged your knees. I heard your sniffles and you began to shake. I moved to your side and

hugged you again, you buried your face in my chest and let it all out. “Why’d she have to leave?”, you cried, hands my shirt, “I still

n-needed her.” I knew there was nothing I could say or do, I could only let you mourn as long as you needed. You could take months or

years, and I would still be there trying to help you get over this.

    After about half an hour you were still leaning on me, but this time facing the tombstone. “She’s in a better place.”, you said, “I should

be happy.” We stayed like that for a while until the sun began setting. People who were leaving came by and would bid you goodbye. It

wasn’t until your dad came by that you realized the time.

    “Do you want to go home?” I asked. Your face said that you didn’t so I took your hand and began walking. “Where are we going?”, you

asked curiously. I smiled, “Let’s get lost for a while.” You smiled and tried your hardest to keep up.

    We walked around for hours and I took you places I knew you couldn’t be sad in.

By the end of the night though, we ended up right back at your mother’s grave. You tied the string of the balloon to one of the bouquets

of flowers. “I hope you’re happy up there mommy.” you smiled sadly, “Don’t worry about us, daddy and I…we’ll-we’ll be fine.”

     I wiped the tears that came down from your eyes. “I’ll take good care of them omeoni, I promise.” , I said. You looked at me and

smiled, “I picked a good one right omma?” My ears heated up as you pecked my cheek. I knew that I needed to do it right then and there

before I chickened out. “I want to give you something.” I cleared my throat.

    You furrowed your brows, “What is it oppa?” I turned so that I was completely facing you. “I’ve never loved someone the way I love

you.” You shyly looked up at me. “And, whenever I think of my future, I see you there…next to me. I know that it’s too soon and I might

seem crazy for this but, I love you so much and I want you to know that you’re the only one I’ll look at, always.”

    You widened your eyes as I dug in my pocket. “Your dad gave this to me today, and, just…think of it as a promise ring?” I opened the

small box and revealed the ring.

“M-my dad gave you that?” you looked at it. I nodded, “Now, you can always have something that reminds you of her.” I gave a quick

glance at the tombstone.


    The expression on your face was priceless, at first I thought you were crying because I reminded you that she wasn’t here anymore.

“I’m sorry baby.” I cringed and shut the box closed. “No.”, you shook your head, “No, these-these are happy tears.”

You grabbed my hand and nodded. Smiling, I took out the ring and slid it onto your finger. “I love you.”, we chorused.