chapter thirty eight- same.

Jonghyun felt a knife, continuously stabbing his chest, all throughout the school day. It was the class right before lunch and the pang in his chest hadn’t gone away. The pang of guilt in his chest.

A part of him wanted to hold her in his arms and whisper to her that it will be alright. Another part wanted to go and shout at everyone who was talking bad about her.

But he didn’t give in to any of those parts. He stayed still, and watched her fight. He wanted her to fight, he wanted everyone to see her.

Him wanting everyone to see her made him actually see her.

She was in pain. And he was the one inflicting that pain on her.

Oh god, Jonghyun, just go tell her it’s going to be alright! Get her out of school, the poor girl is suffering enough already!

He wanted to curse out loud and take all the pressure on himself. Yet again, the more pressure on him meant the more pressure on Minhyun.

He was trapped between his selfish wishes and goodwill for her.

He didn’t want to tell her, he wanted to pretend as if nothing happened, but now, none of that was possible. He had to tell her, at some point if her mother didn’t. And he was scared.

Kim Jonghyun was scared.

He was scared that he might lose her, after getting so close to her.

Baby, my little angel, oppa is sorry. Sorry oppa is not protecting you; sorry oppa is making you go through all this. But you aren’t alone, okay? Even you don’t have anyone by your side; a lot of people have you in their heart.

Princess, my darling, oppa will go away. You won’t have to go through this when oppa is gone, right? Oppa will go away, but oppa won’t ever leave you alone.

Time was ticking even more slowly than before.

Suddenly, he felt his phone vibrate in my pocket. Checking whether the teacher was looking or not, he took it out and read the text he had gotten.

His eyes widened.

/No makes my Jonghyun cry. Not even Nam Yoora.

Landing in two hours./

just got real.

-

It seemed to take forever for the lunch bell to ring. As soon as it rang, Jonghyun dashed out of the class room as fast as he could. The teacher, rest of the students, even Baekho watched him leave in complete bewilderment.

When he got to Yuri’s class, the teacher still hadn’t left. He bowed ninety degrees then advanced towards Yuri, who looked surprised.

“Pack your bag.” He whispered to her, completely ignoring the fact that everyone, not just in the class, but in the hallways too, were staring at him. “Hurry.”

He turned to Ren and who immediately got the message. Without a second glance or thought, he walked out of class and went in the direction of the stairs.

Jonghyun took out his phone and started texting again, as Yuri packed.

“What’s going on?” she asked. From her voice, Jonghyun could feel that she was confused, almost scared.

“Kim Jonghyun.” The teacher in the class called out, his voice solid. “What do you think are you doing?”

“With all due respect, teach, I’m taking her with the permission of the principal.” He said and beckoned Yuri. When she got up with her bag, he grabbed her bag and threw it over his shoulder and grabbing her hand, ran out of the class.

“What’s going on, oppa?” Jonghyun heard Yuri mumble as she tried to keep up with his pace. He knew he had to tell her, but he knew he couldn’t. He’d lose her. And he didn’t want that.

Yes, he was selfish. Even though he had thoughts of leaving, he was selfish. He’d leave, but he didn’t want to lose her.

“My mom’s coming.” He managed to mumble as they ran. That was enough for Yuri. She understood, she didn’t pry, she obeyed.

He was glad.

-

“What are you doing? Get ready!” Jonghyun growled as he stormed pass Minhyun into Eunbi’s apartment, still dragging Yuri with him.

“You’re going insane, Jonghyun!” Minhyun sighed as his best friend stormed past him. “You’re being too reckless.”

“I don’t care, Minhyun. My mom is coming, everything is as good as gone.”

“You are making it like that. Try to understand, Jonghyun!”

“I don’t want to!”

From the corner of his eyes, Jonghyun saw Yuri look frightened. He bit his inner cheek, squeezed his eyes shut and while running his hair through his hair, frustrated, he sighed.

“I just don’t want to go through all that again, Minhyun.” He mumbled, falling onto the couch behind me. “I just want to prevent my mom from clashing with Yuri’s. Is that too much to ask for?”

They remained in silence, until Hyein entered the scene.

“Oh! Jonghyun-ah!” she gasped. “I didn’t know you were coming.”

Jonghyun and Yuri frowned as they looked at the older lady.  Minhyun, who had momentarily forgotten about Hyein, inwardly sighed. This was going to be tough.

“What are you doing here, noona?” Jonghyun asked, in a way that made it really obvious that it was the place she was least expected to be at.

“Hyein noona is here because Eunbi noona told her to come.” Minhyun answered taking a glance at her. “To babysit me.” He quickly added.

Jonghyun sent a disapproving glance at both of them before turning to Yuri. He patted the place beside him for her to come and sit.

Minhyun and Hyein took this as a sign that things went back to normal.

“Get ready, Minhyun. Hyung’s picking us up in thirty.”Jonghyun said as he raised his legs onto the chair to hug them. The action greatly surprised Yuri, but she didn’t show it.

“Which one?”

“Woohyun hyung. Now hurry.” Then he turned to Hyein. “Noona, can you please make us some hot chocolate?” his aegyo was rare, but when used, as ganderous as an atomic bomb.

The both females wanted to melt.

Minhyun, however, just rolled his eyes. Typical Jonghyun.

-

“That…was unexpected.” I mumbled to Jonghyun oppa as we both sat on Eunbi unnie’s couch, waiting for the hot chocolate Hyein unnie was making. “You are also…soft.”

I heard his laugh. “Of course I’m soft. I’m only too human.”

“Oppa is cute too.” I said, turning to him with a smile. “I never saw that in you!”

A light shade of pink covered his ears as he chuckled and scratched his head, embarrassedly.

Aw, so cute! He looks like Woohyun oppa!

“You also acted rather unexpectedly.” He said, turning to face me, hugging his knees close to his chest like a little child. “I thought you would freak out when you saw the damage on his face.”

I smiled at him. “Mentally, I did. But then I realized that there’s this gap that stops me from worrying. Who am I to him? Who am I to worry about him? Not his family, not his lover.” I turned away. “And more than that, he’s a rebel. I’m the opposite.”

I heard another chuckle. “Pretty true, in fact. Who are you to worry? Definitely not family or lover.”  I heard oppa say. “But I can assure you, you mean to him more than even I do.”

“That’s a lie.”

“No, it’s not. He told me that he promised you he’d be back, when he ran out after me. He told me he felt like not going back.”

“Let me guess, and that he’d get you back for that?”

“Something along those lines.”

We shared the sound of laughter together. For the first time, I noticed how he laughed. And how his laughter was so similar to mine. And then, how we sounded the same.

shotuout!

spazzing over BAP and NU'EST mv teasers [omg, my feels..]
bio experiment + chocolate sponge cake has to be done by tomorrow TT.TT
later!~