Mir was overthinking more than usual. Everyone was worried about him and his behaviour in the last weeks, but anyone knows why he was like that. No one could imagine that.

It was a fact: he fell in love. He never told anyone, also when he started to feel those feelings he never told anyone, even if he wasn’t able at first what he was feeling. Now that his feelings were stronger and hurtful he didn’t know what to do. So this was the cause of his state of overthinking.

“Mir! What the hell pay attention!” Seungho scolded him like always. They were practicing and he made the wrong move. He couldn’t help it, it was stronger than him. He quickly apologized with the leader and went back to his spot to start the choreography again.

“Cheolyong…” they were back at the dorm and Seungho called him, he wanted to talk just to figure out what was going on in the mankae’s brain.

“Neh, Hyung?” he lazily answered. He was too tired, not only physically, he was mentally in pain, he only wanted to collapse in his bed and try to sleep, even if in those days it was impossible.

“What’s going on?” the older asked with a concerned look, his profound eyes into the smallest’s. Why he has to act like this? The poor young thought. It was such a pain for him seeing the older be concerned for him. His brain didn’t need other things to reflect over.

“Nothing. Just… It’s just a period.” He his feet and started walking on his way towards his room.

Why I’ve to love him so much?

As he had thought his night was full of thoughts, tears and inner screams. He couldn’t stand that anymore, he hadn’t any more strength to face what he was feeling. He hugged tight his pillow, like it was able to delete his mind, the picture of him printed in his memory, the sound of his voice. All was too much for him to handle. He decided go straight with a solution, an extreme one, that came into his head. He had to do that, for him, for the band and for the fans. It was the last thing that he could do, the saddest and hurtful one.

“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU SAYING?” G.O stated at the sudden shock. Like the other member he was shocked. That morning everyone got up and found out that Mir wasn’t there anymore. He left the dorm without saying a word, leaving only two lines to say goodbye to all and that he was leaving the group. The dorm was filled with anger and sadness, they couldn’t understand what pushed the young man to leave them.

“I’m not going to accept this thing!” Seungho almost yelled. In other situations he was the one with cold nerves, who thought before acting, but when it comes to be a thing like that he lost all the nerves to think straight. “I’m going to look for him!”

“Hyung! We don’t know where he could be, where you’re going to check?”

“I’m just going!”

No, Seungho wasn’t going to accept at all this thing. He wanted to know why and firstly why he didn’t told him all this. He was sure that between him and Mir there was a close friendship, Mir told always everything to him and he didn’t know why this time was so different.

He walked upside down the city looking for him, when he reached a park. He was tired as hell, it was like six or seven hours that he was running and screaming the young’s name around. He entered in that park, it was familiar to him, but at the first sight he didn’t remember why. Then, looking around, he realized that it was the park where him and the maknae went together when they needed to talk or simply to stay a bit in peace. They usually sat in one of the bench that where on the bank of a small lake.

He started to run again towards that lake, feeling like the young man could be there, and there in fact he was. His gaze was towards the water, his look was a mist of pain and sadness that was too strong and started to come out in a river of little tears on his cheeks. He was relieved that he was safe and a tip of anger started to grew in him. He sat down near Mir, not saying a word. Mir was dumbfounded seeing his leader there. He knew that it was the place where he passed most of his time, but he couldn’t imagine that he elder could think that he was here. Indeed, at first he thought that no one was going to look for him, who was only a little ant in a desert. His heart started to beat as fast as it could be.

“Why?” that was the only word that Seungho told at that moment. It was the only thing that he cared to know.

“ ‘Cause I can’t be with the group anymore.”

“Why?” the elder’s voice raised a bit the tone trying to act firm, even when all his inside was so unstable and fragile looking at the young man’s condition.

“Listen. I’m going straight with my decision, nothing will change. Don’t waste your time trying to know things that I will never tell and that you will never want to here. Please, come back to the others.” The last part of his speech went slowly becoming a whisper. He didn’t want to tell Seungho what he was feeling inside, he was too afraid of his reaction, he always had be. He loved him too much.

“I ASKED YOU WHY!” Seungho’s voice was now a loud yell. He was frustrated of the other’s act, he couldn’t understand what was bothering him this much. He cared about him too much, he always cared about Mir, but it seemed that the young wasn’t able to understand.

“Hyung. I-I can’t. Okay? It’s just too bigger for me to handle and I’m too coward to face it.”

“Cheolyong. What are you saying? Please, I just want to understand what the hell is going on your head! It hurts seeing you like this!”

The younger looked into the other’s eyes, he saw how much he was concerned for him. I’m going to go away anyway, it will hurts bit at least I told him all…

“I-I… It’s hard to explain.” He turned his gaze again into the water. “I never told to anyone this and it grew into me too much that I can’t handle it anymore. Hyung, I’m in love…”

Seungho felt something into his chest, he knew that it was wrong loving the young man, but it couldn’t do anything for the tip of jealousy that poked his heart. He was in love with someone. What did you think, Seungho? That he would never fall in love for someone? Stupid, you’re a stupid.

“Who?” his lips moved alone, without any specific order of the owner.

Other tears started to fall over the young’s cheeks. He started to talk and he has to finish what he had to tell, he couldn’t go back.

“… I-it’s you” his voice was a low whisper, but the elder heard it. His heart stopped for what he thought was an eternity. The thing that was bothering Mir so much was love and this love was for him. He couldn’t believe to what he had heard. He couldn’t anything than looking straight in the young’s face. He raised a hand, approaching those cheeks covered by tears. He wiped the salt water in a sweet way, his heart was full of joy.

“You’re such an idiot. You could have told me that before…” he took the younger’s chin to allow him to look straight in his eyes. “I love you too. And I hided it ‘cause I thought that my love was a one sided love, that it was wrong loving you. I-I love you so much and I’m feeling so bad that you were so down for this and-”

He was cut off by the others lips that climbed into his.

If it’s a dream, please don’t wake me up.

The both thought the same thing and when the soft kiss ended the younger rested his head into the other’s shoulder for a while, before going back to the dorm.

Seungho opened the front door revealing three men very worried who stared at the two with shocked eyes.

“WHAT THE HELL. YOU TWO WANTED ME TO DIE? I’D KILL YOU WITH MY HANDS IF I ONLY DIDN’T CARE OF YOU! Where the hell have you been?” he went to hug the two, hugging tighter the younger. Then the other two joined into the hug. It was a precious moment: Mir was happy now knowing that Seungho loved him back, the same was for Seungho, G.O, Joon and Cheondoong were happy to see again the maknae with them.

How it says?

All is well that ends well.