He Said He Doesn't Want Me To Be Hurt

18.12.2017 

❤❤❤He was what I believed that people called an true angle... 

He became the remedy for my tutored sould... 

His voice healed me and encouraged me to walk on this 2 faced society... I believe he was the only one that didn't wear a mask...

 His smile gave me the strength and it was my good luck charm. 

His eyes told me I was not alone...

 But....It was all too well when the wings were loosing it's color... 

Reality stuck me hard...

In a flash he was gone... I stood there....confused and melancholic... 

But I knew that at one time we have to let go...of all the things we love... 

He lit up my path so far...

I traveled due to his light...but now it's all dark...

 The snow creates me a cold path of tears to talk on... 

My heart is like cracked ice...about to fall and let the misery flood me over...

 But no...He told me to hold on... He said he doesn't want me to be hurt.. 

So I said..I won't..and I praised him..

 Looking up the pale blue sky that's slowly turning into a various shades of colors as the sun sets...along with him...

 He did all he could...he made me happy...he made us happy...he was the best person I ever came across... 

Words are not even close enough to say how much I love you and how much I miss you... No songs or poems or anything will not do..  

Oh I wish I could join you...

But...I have to complete this journey and I promise I will share it with you...

 I'm sorry I wasn't there for you...whist you were here for me...singing for me to calm down. 

I'm sorry I didn't notice earlier that you wanted one last bit of genuine love and affection... 

So here you are...even though I doubt you will see this...or hear my cries.... I hope to see you again...in another life...

I shall wait till then...before I eventually join you...

 Thank you for always making me smile through everything and making me feel like a special human... 

I'm truly sorry I couldn't do the same for you....

We may be miles apart...but we are always one through our heart and soul.... 

Thank you once again Kim Jonghyun... My angle may you rest in peace up in heaven... 

You will forever hold a special place in my heart... 

I can tell you that those 27 years of you were never spent in vain.. 

You did more than well...  I love you....❤

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Redofthedawn #1 Aug 7, 2023 07:53:21

I'm aware that it isn't December but I just thought of this post. December will never be easy for a lot of us. I'm more aware of my depression around that time. I just became an adult and the realization that a lot can change has finally hit me. I'm not sure how to feel. People within my family have died or are dying and it seems like the only thing I'm allowed to do is move on. I'm no longer given the luxury of grieving the way I had with Jonghyun. There are so many fond memories that I can go back to with Jjong but for them I only have memories. So much has happened these past few years and while I'm not completely okay I can say there's plenty of room where I've healed.

As year 6 approaches I want my fellow Shawols to know that healing is hardly a linear task. It's okay to not be ready but where you are there's always going to be SHINee.

And Dear Author thank you for keeping this space for all of us.

luv_kero ^{2443 streak} #2 Dec 18, 2022 09:15:11

Thank you for keeping this space for us for so many years <3 This milestone hit me a lot harder than expected, but seeing this brought so much comfort. Miss you to the moon and back, Jonghyun <3

Viola_Ella #3 Dec 18, 2022 03:56:50

Chapter 818: When I saw in newfeed I just realised today is the day. He is a sweet,kind and precious soul. I miss him.

Evelyn_64 #4 Dec 18, 2022 00:55:41

It’s been five years today and just a few days ago I turned 27, the age Jonghyun-ah was when we had to say goodbye to him. I have long since had to “become an adult” and learn what growing up means; yet every year I come back to this little space, and read some of the messages that people wrote for him, and think back to the letter I wrote at 22 and never shared with anyone. I think back to a memory of me looking at the full moon and talking to him for hours, telling him I missed him terribly. We still miss you, friend. I still remember you fondly. I still remember me at 17 dancing to Replay in my room. I’ll always cherish those memories of our Spring.

Author, I hope you have been doing well. Thank you so much for keeping this space running for so long, it brings comfort to some more than you’ll ever know.

OdetteSwan ^{929 streak} #5 Dec 18, 2022 00:11:36

I'm so glad you won the bid. I will start collecting karma points again.
Good work.

OdetteSwan ^{929 streak} #6 Dec 18, 2021 15:31:45

Chapter 818: I just really paid attention to SHINee this August. Yet, when Jonghyun passed away four years ago, I felt sad that another beautiful and caring person chose to leave this place. In fact, I didn't want to listen to any SHINee songs then.
Now, watching SHINee's MVs, I feel like I have accepted what happened and hope that he is really happy now.

Redofthedawn #7 Dec 18, 2021 15:23:33

Time keeps moving on and I wonder why I can't just go back and fix things to when it was so peaceful. So much has happened in the last four years and it feels as though there's only SHINee left to comfort me. Jonghyun for so long I've written my letters to you and I couldn't this year because I couldn't find the strength or will to when I was feeling down. I haven't cried this much since I was a baby. I promised last year that I would tread the new year with caution and that didn't work out so great. There's more I wanna say but I just wish you knew how much I love you. Thank you for being born and sharing your light with the world. Sincerely I love you. 𝑰 𝒘𝒊𝒍𝒍 𝒂𝒍𝒘𝒂𝒚𝒔 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖 ❤️

lovelyfeisty #8 Dec 18, 2021 05:29:15

It’s been 4 years now and so it’s hard to believe that you left us, but I still do remember you as SHINee’s Blingbling Angel and as the brightest star that shines in the sky.

I used to feel so lonely after knowing that you left us, that I was listening to Lonely everyday for about a year, but now I just remind myself that you’re still with us, as the bright shining star watching over us from the night sky. ❤️
I will always love you.

wonpokemon #9 Dec 17, 2021 22:21:02

i was InMemoryOfJonghyun!
just thought i'll let you know so you don't add this username again~ =]
anyways, good luck with the add and for all those who come here and are thinking of Jjong and of others and themselves.

aseulmonsta #10 Jul 21, 2021 15:41:11

❤️