"He'll join it."

He widened his eyes when I said so. I glanced at him for a while before I stood up leaving him and Hyunsik who was hyped up by my words. I was originally want to go to the restroom, but somehow I still remembered the bullying and made up my mind. I was going to the teacher's restroom instead.

It's funny because only in a month, my life changed into something I never planned before. I hated him, not only because of my cynical judgement about him, but also because I avoided the crowd around him. He has always been so lovely because of his angelic face and voice until everybody gives him all attention without him trying. While I am here, not wanting anyone knows that I'm exist. 

These 2 years was just so peaceful, until he grew that curiosity of at our last year in high school. If he didn't save me that day, those people would hate me, and that would pass in some time and forgot everything after a month. I'll be the invisible girl again.

Now, those people just hated me even more, knowing that their Do Kyungsoo pull himself away from them and befriend with me instead. I was afraid too, not because of what people say about us, it's because I'm afraid that I would feel many happiness with him. For me, a slight happiness would make me remembered my mistake in the past, a mistake that made me regret everything.

I promised myself not to have any strong bond anymore with anyone.  I had lost everything in my life, and I still felt that wound pounding inside my heart. I believe what I've been doing this whole time is just to save me, from other losses.

I didn't realize tears that was dropping on my cheeks. I washed my face to make it look normal. When I looked to my reflection in mirror, I was asking her with my weak voice.

"Have you forget what happened 2 years ago, Han Sora? The reason you couldn't save them?"

I promised myself since then to have no friend. Because being happy hanging out with them could remind me of what happened to my family. I could never feel happy again since then, I would only embrace my loneliness and enjoy it for the rest of my life. 

So, I was supposed to keep a distance with Do Kyungsoo, the one who threatened my state of mind right now. Him, who I am unable to get rid of, in every day, and night.
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And it's getting more difficult day by day.

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It was 4 p.m. already, and I just finished taking a bath. I chose a red flanel shirt and jeans to wear tonight. I barely put some make up on, just a baby powder to have something on my face and a thin lip tint to cover my lips. 

"I am in front your door."
A text arrived from him when I was gathering my hair up to make a ponytail.

It was still 4.20 and he had come already? He was having that spirit to come. The event would begin at 7 though.

I put my grey converse sneakers on before I left my room. I let out a long exhales to calm my self. I planned to be there as brief as I can, just to keep my promise to him.

When I opened the door, a figure of man wearing a white shirt with black trousers, his back facing me, suddenly looked at me with his bright smile. I blinked my eyes a few time to believe that it's Do Kyungsoo. He looked somehow nice and something in his face made me lose my mind for a moment.

"Are you ready?"
"Yeah..."

He lead me to the car parked not far away from my apartment. When I got in the front seat, I had a look inside his car. It's Mercedes, with its typical compartments and a scent like fresh water filled the air inside. I was looking at the back passenger compartment when I saw some paper bag filled with foods and vegetables on the passenger seat.
I was going to ask him, but he could predict the question through my face.

"My treat. Dinner at my house first, Han Sora."

He started the machine and drove slowly. I was thinking so hard there before I could get a grip on my self back.

"You didn't tell me before. I thought we will go to the festival?"
"I promised to cook for you. As I have time today, so I'll do it."
"But..."
"It's just like other dinner."

That look in his face made me shut my mouth and held my panic inside. 
Not until 10 minutes, he stopped his car in front of a house. He parked outside and tell me to go out.

"Are your parents at home?"
"Yeah.. my mom and my hyung are. My father should be coming home by now."

He said calmly while taking the paper bags from the passengers seat. I took one from his hand, and let him take the two others. 

His house is a two stories building, with a small park in front, and a garage for two cars. They have some fruit trees, like mango and longan tree and some flowers too. I was busy fixing my shirt and some hair falling on my side when he chuckled at my action.

"Don't be nervous. You look okay."
He opened the door and calling for his mother. I was following him hesitantly.
"Eomma, I'm home!"

A middle age women came from the stairs and approached us not long after. Her figure was slim, short haired, and have the same pale skin with Kyungsoo. 

She looked at me with an enthusiastic expression as I bowed 90° to her.

"Aigoo, this is Han Sora, right?" She asked me while grabbing into my shoulder to make me end my bow and giving me a similar smile with Kyungsoo. 
"Yes, Ajumoni."
"It's better eommonim." She told me with a big smile.
"Aah, y yes, eommonim." 

I was nervous even if his mother was being so friendly like this. It's because I rarely had contact with other people, beside my co-workers, and him.
He watched us while munching an apple, his lips never changed from his smile form seeing us getting along.

"Now let us cook for dinner, Eomma. It's getting late." 

He took over my body by his hand on my shoulder. I couldn't resist but to follow his move.

"You shouldn't make her busy and leave her with me instead, Do Kyungsoo" Her mom told him with an unamused expression.

"Later at dinner, Eomma. Now, please rest and just wait for it."

"Tell me if you need help, Sora-ya." She told me as she soothed my back with a soft caresses before leaving to go upstairs.

I followed Do Kyungsoo accross the living room. His house was dominated by light brown wooden furniture. I could see many trophies in the cupboard at the corner of the living room, probably his trophies from singing contests. Everybody knows he had the talent since kid. The same talent that made him really beloved by our friends at school. However, I never met a chance to hear him singing, just a few humming sound when we're at class or just to kill the silence when we walked home together.

A huge home theater was put in the center of the living room, definitely perfect one to enjoy some movies, I thought. In front of the TV, there are three-set sofa, with one large sofabed and two other typical sofa. As for the decoration, a dried tall grass stored in a wooden vase at the other corner of the room. 

And there were many  family photos on the wall, some of group photos and individual ones. A photo of a kid, with the same face as Do Kyungsoo attracted my attention. He looked just the same as now, but in a lot cuter way. It looked like he doesn't age since baby.

"You're very cute when you were kid."

I said when we arrived at the kitchen.

"It's still here," 

he said it with his index finger pressed on his chubby cheek, against his smile.

I chuckled at his aegyo and his cheeks turned red because of that. He saved the moment by scattering all goods he bought on the counter and separated them.

"Can you help me with the veggies? I'll cook the rice first."
"What are we making, Kyungsoo?"
"Doenjang jiggae, japchae, bulgogi. Sorry not sorry, you're not eating kimbap for dinner tonight, Han Sora."

He teased me as he ed his shirt around his wrist, and rolled it until his elbow.

I did as he requested, taking all the veggies to the sink and washed them one by one. By the time he had set the rice cooker, he continued with the meat and some seafood to wash. He was standing side by side with me and help me cleaning the rest of the veggies. 

"Do you often cook, Do Kyungsoo?"
"I helped my mother often when she's cooking. I only cook when there's nothing to eat."
"It's my first time to set the dinner anyway."

I looked at him in horror, did he just say he did this for the first time?

"Don't worry. I did some research and ask my mom about the recipe."

He gave me instructions about what veggies to chop or mince and how to do it precisely before went to the sink afterwards. He did everything in a very calm way and moved back and forth checking if I did right, in a very cautious manner. I boiled the noodles for japchae too then kept it in a cold water as he told me to. 

All veggies, mushrooms, spices, meat, seafood, tofu were ready to cook. Then it was time to switch on the stove. We used both of stoves available. One for bulgogi and the other for doenjang jiggae. 
He took care of the jiggae and I was responsible for bulgogi. I still remembered the time I cooked with my mom, even if it's bitter to remember it at the moment, but I couldn't help myself from reminiscing the memory.

"Sora-ya, pay attention to the meat. It could be over cooked."

I came back to my sense and stir it nicely for the last time before I switch the stove off. I took a slice of meat and let it cool before offering him to taste it.

He opened his mouth while looking at me who was feeding him. After munching a few times, he widened his eyes and let out a funny voice, imitating a famous actor saying it's delicious.

"Delicious.You cook well." 

In a minute, there's a sound of a door knob unlocked coming from the front door. I was peeking, trying to see who was it when Do Kyungsoo got out of the kitchen and met his father. 

"Appa, "
"Aah, Kyungsoo-ya. You're home already? It's rare sight these days."
"Yeah, I had occasion tonight, but I really want to cook for everyone first. Here, let me introduce Appa to my friend, Han Sora."

I was dragged by Kyungsoo to meet his father. I bowed to him, who looked similar to Kyungsoo because of their face shape and chubby cheeks.

 
"Aah, this is that Han Sora."

I assumed Do Kyungsoo had told stories about me to his family before I came here. Just, how much did he say?

"Annyeong haseyo, Ahjussi. I'm Han Sora. Nice to meet you"
"Yes yes, nice to meet you too. Kyungsoo rarely brought his friends home, so I supposed you are really close."
"That..." I glanced at him who was smiling proudly in front of his father for some reason.
"Of course, Appa."

I looked at him in disbelief. How could he say something like that? I remembered saying to him that I didn't even acknowledge him as my friend either.
But I could do nothing but forcing a smile on my face in front of his father

"Just... How about your cooking, Kyungsoo?"
"Aaah..." He hurriedly rushed into the stove and switch it off.
I bowed to his father once again before he got upstairs.

"It is saved. Thank goodness." He said after tasting some with a spoon. 
"Do you want to taste it?"
"Kyungsoo-ya, what did you tell your family about me?"
"Okay then, you could taste it later. I'll make japchae then, "
"Do Kyungsoo?"
"I told them everything, but there's nothing to be worried about."

Finally after making japchae, we set the table in the dining room, right across the kitchen. There are 5 dinner set for us, his parents and his brother. His brother was 3 year older than Kyungsoo. He looked like Kyungsoo when he was chubbier. I was sat beside Kyungsoo and across his mother. His father sat in the middle and lead us to pray before eating. His mom really took care of me well by offering the food, and sometime initiatively put the food on my bowl, just like what she did to the other guys. 

They praised our cook and said that they're tasty. Do Kyungsoo seemed really happy and proud at the same time. They shared each other's story of the day which full of funny things and made me giggled many times. I was still shy to let out laughter in front of them which Kyungsoo found that really amusing.

"It's good having everyone eat together like this. Gomawo, Kyungsoo-ya, Han Sora. We ate well." His father thanked us which we replied humbly by saying it's nothing.
"Kyungsoo usually doesn't have time to eat dinner with us because he comes home late, and he often skipped dinner when he got home."
"You know I need to lose weight, Eomma... Anyway, I told you I ate Sora's kimbap everyday."

I looked at him, trying to understand that these times he only ate my kimbap to survive the day. And why does he need to lose weight? Is he going on something?

"Still, Kyungsoo-ya. You should eat well like tonight so that I don't worry about your health too much then." His mom told him in a typical mom-way that made him give up speaking more.

"Now, I'll wash the dishes." Her mom started gathering the empty bowls but I initiatively stopped her for doing so.

"It's okay eommonim, I'll do it instead."

"No no, you had cooked for us, you're guest here anyway..."

"It's really okay. I have to pay for the delicious dinner." I told her while smiling ear to ear. I insisted to do it by taking the stacked bowls and chopsticks to the sink.

"Gomawo, Han Sora. You are really a good girl." His mom told me with a soothing moves on my back after helping me taking the rest dinner tools to the sink.Her eyes and smile delivered something sincere in her grateful words for tonight's dinner. I was so shy and keep saying that it's nothing to thank about.

"So, when are you guys going to school? It's almost 7." His brother asked Do Kyungsoo while they're tidying up the dinner table.

"I'll go there at 8. it's okay to come late I supposed."

"I made the booking with the dentist at 7 though. Appa, Eomma do you remember it's today?"

Both of their parents said Aaah as if they forgot it while busy getting prepared to go out. He said it's their routine schedule every 6 months to check their teeth to the dentist, but this time Kyungsoo couldn't go with them. 

I was washing the dishes diligently when suddenly my head became a little bit dizzy.

Their voices getting unclear as I washed the last bowl. Their voices getting fade when I tried to put the bowl to the drier rack besides the sink.

I supported my head to control the dizziness and massaged my temple with a strong press to make it better. But it felt useless because I got dizzier and heard a loud drone in my ears that made me grabbed on to the edge of the sink to keep me standing.

As I heard the door closed, my vision blurred and my body collapsed on the floor.
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"Sora-ya, we will come home later."
But they never did.