I think I...
“Five minutes and we will in air,” said SHINee’s manager.
“Ok!” said SHINee.
“Let’s go, we will do it well, right?” said Onew with a smile.
“Yes, SHINee fighting!” they shouted.
“Oh, wait a minute, I received a mail,” said Taemin.
“Hurry up, Taeminnie, we have… two minutes,” said Onew.
Taemin opened the mail and almost dropped his cell phone.
“Taemin, let’s go, we will be in air in one minute, Taemin, are you okay?” asked Minho.
“Hyung, we are in trouble.”
“What are you talking about?”
Taemin showed the mail to Minho.
“Who else know about this? Only you received that mail? Oh, no, I also received it.”
“Minho hyung, the pictures has been spread to everywhere,” said Taemin.
“Hey, guys, can you come out? We are the guest of a program, remember?” said Jonghyun.
Taemin and Minho tried to pretend everything was okay but they were worried and they smile looked weird.
“Jonghyun hyung, there are pictures of Onew and Jessica kissing on internet,” whispered Taemin to Jonghyun when the camera wasn’t focusing them. The same did Minho to Key.
Key couldn’t avoid it but when she saw Jessica his smile disappeared.
“We are going to a commercial break, don't change your channel, more about SHINee and SNSD in few minutes,” said the MC.
Taemin and Jonghyun immediately started a discussion.
“What if Sungyeon see the pictures? She will think is over,” said Taemin.
“No, this can’t be happen. I’m sure Sungyeon is busy with his schedule, maybe she doesn’t have time to read news,” said Jonghyun.
“Hyung, I don’t have time to read news but received it in my mail and read it in my cell phone,” said Taemin.
“Oh, yes, you right.”
“I have something to tell you, guys,” said Onew to his fellow members and took them to the waiting room.
Jonghyun, Key, Minho and Taemin looked each other, nervous.
I have made a hard decision but it was for the sake of SHINee and me. I was scared and tired of how my life has turned, I felt a big void in my life, like if I hadn’t a soul, without Sungyeon my life seemed so empty but now that I finally realized that she doesn’t love me, I had no choice but to give up and look forward a new life. I can't live only on memories of her, right?
Yesterday, in the bar, I saw Jessica in a different way, I always considered her like a friend, just a friend. I don’t love her to be honest but I knew she likes me, and I understand how is feel not being loved, so why don’t give her a chance? I thought if I gave her a chance, she could fill that void.
“I think I have fallen for Jessica,” I told them.
“Yesterday in the bar, I realized that she cares a lot about me, she always has been with me in my worst moments, why don’t give her a chance?”
“You are kidding us, right?”
Why they were so angry? I thought they will be happy about the news.
“What about Sungyeon? You have forgotten her?”
I didn’t know what to answer, if I tell them that I have not forgotten her, they will think I’m crazy for want to be with Jessica.
“Is time to come back,” announced manager.
“Let’s go,” I said.
“Sungyeon, your goodbye stage was last week, why are still practicing? You should go home and rest,” said my manager.
“It's just that I have nothing else to do or go,” I said.
I wasn’t tired, and didn’t care spend my time in dancing, it was the only thing I have been doing lately, beside sing.
“It’s okay, I’ll go to home in a little.”
“Ok, take care, Sungyeon.”
Once I was in my house, I felt like a stranger stalking someone else house. During my comeback stage, the practice room became my second home; I only went back to my house to sleep.
Now that I have a long break, what should I do? Maybe call a friend to hang out. Sounded well, it's been awhile since I go out with friends.
“Phone, phone, where is my phone? Aish, my home is such a mess, ah; here it is, oh, I even have a new message.”
I dropped my cell from my hands and broke.
I swear I saw a picture of Onew kissing Jessica, or am I going crazy? I didn’t care about the broken cell phone and ran to the computer to check if what I saw was real or it was my imagination. My heart was beating double time and I was in the verge of crying. I knew it wasn’t necessary to check it, I knew Onew will eventually fall in love with her.
I only was torturing myself looking for those pictures. When I opened the mail, I confirmed what I saw. It was him kissing Jessica.
For some reason, tears didn’t come out, I was so shocked about the news, I was like petrified, scared about the reality. The person I loved has already forgotten me?
The loneliness and silence of my house was driving me crazy. Empty, it was how my life felt, empty and cold.
I lay on bed and turned on the television and put in on a random channel, just to hear any noise but I actually wasn’t hearing anything.
SHINee members were worried about Onew; they just couldn’t believe what they heard from him minutes ago.
Taemin felt guilty because it was his idea to bring Onew to the bar, if they didn’t bring him to there, he wouldn’t see Jessica and she wouldn’t be able to kiss him. It’s my entire fault, what should I do? Sungyeon will hate me for the rest of her life, he thought.
Minho still was shocked; he never imagined that Onew hyung had feelings for Jessica. Why love has to be so complicated?
Key mind was full of thoughts, he was thinking in the many possibilities to stop him.
Instead, Jonghyun knew exactly what to do.
In the second commercial break, manager nagged SHINee and asked them to try to smile more often.
“I know yesterday you went to drink and have fun but now you are working. Can’t you be more talkative, what happened to you, Jonghyun? Why you haven’t said a word?”
“Sorry, manager. We will do it better next time,” Onew apologized.
Then Onew took their fellow members to a corner.
What is he going to tell us, now? Thought Minho worried.
“As I told you, I think I’m love with Jessica, I will take advantage that the program is in live and they won’t edit out anything, I’ll tell to the world that I love her.”
They were speechless for a moment, did they hear well?
“You think you are in love but you don’t love her,” Key said finally.
“No, I lov-” said Onew but couldn’t finish the phrase and looked down.
“I have already decided it,” Onew said.
“We are going back from commercials,” announced manager.
“Aish, why these commercials are so short?” said Key annoyed.
“What are we going to do?” whispered Key to Jonghyun.
Minho and Taemin exchanged worried looks.
It was now or never, I have one minute before the show starts. I knew what I had to do is tell him the truth once and for all. I don’t care about the company, Sungyeon’s manager, my manager and what the sasaeng fans said, this could not continue.
I grabbed Onew hyung's arm and stopped him.
OMG yesterday Asianfanfic gave me a scare -.- I wanted to upload a chapter and when i opened my fanfic, it said "There is no fanfic" and my account "didn't exit" or "was deleted"... but today returned to normal ^^ thanks for reading ^^ btw I have been busy with college and SHINee comeback kekek thanks for the patience (:
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