"How about this one?"

 

"Too frilly."

 

"Okay, this one? I can wear the boots you bought me for my birthday. The brown ones."

 

"You mean the ones you threw out last week?"

 

"Oh... right. Well, how about... this?"

 

"You'd really wear yellow? I didn't even know you wore yellow. Is that a new thing now?"

 

"Ok. Ok. OK. I give up."

 

As if a tornado had hit your bedroom, all sorts of clothes from your closet were hanging off of your desk, bed, and your boyfriend. You face-planted into the pile of clothes atop your bed, defeated from the horrors of dressing up.

 

"I swear I'm gonna go out in a trash bag. Don't stop me," you mumbled.

 

"Okay, but when you make the news, I'm gonna deny knowing you."

 

You eyed your boyfriend, Seo Changbin, who was propped up on his elbows and flipping through your romance manga comics. His legs dangled off the edge of the bed as he scanned each page intently. A mountain of clothes balanced on his back - a result of you haphazardly chucking clothes out of your closet for an hour.

 

Rolling over to him, you shoved the pile of clothes off of his back and rested your head atop his arms.  

 

"Tell me not to go, Binnie."

 

"Don't go," he said. "Stay home and watch movies with me."

 

"As tempting as that sounds, I can't because..."

 

"You promised to go, I know."

 

Today was your high school reunion, and although you weren't too keen on attending at first, you and your old high school friend Jennie had reconnected a week ago, sending Facebook messages back and forth. You didn't mind going back to greet some of your homeroom teachers, but weren't particularly fond of the crowd you used to hang out with. You doubted they had changed much in ten years, according to what you had heard from Jennie. She had been one of the more down-to-earth girls from the crowd, but still very much had a habit of following the status quo.

 

You, on the other hand, had changed quite a bit, becoming more down-to-earth and moving away from the gossipy, drama-filled cliques of high school. However, attending the reunion meant gossiping into the night, bragging about yourself, and once again becoming the teenager you had so desperately tried to step away from for one more night.

 

"Babe, I would tell you not to go, but something tells me you want to go," Changbin said. "Why else would you care so much about what you're going to wear?"

 

Oh yeah, that was another thing. Somewhere deep inside you, your old teenage self-pride reared its ugly head, making you feel like it was essential for you to dress to impress those ex-friends. Even though they hadn't been important enough for you to make them a part of your life for the past ten years, you still felt the need to gain their recognition and approval, at least for the few hours of the reunion.

 

"I hate this," you admitted, ashamed of how you were behaving, "it's like I tell myself they're not important, but I feel like I need to impress them. Embarrassing, huh?"

 

Changbin shut the manga book and sat up, gazing at you face-to-face. With his dark eyes and warm hands, he touched your face softly, smoothing your cheek with his thumb. 

 

"Hey. You're not them, ok? So what if you want to look pretty tonight? Look pretty! You are entitled to wearing whatever you want. Just don't forget that you are you. You're my girlfriend. You are a wonderful, smart, funny, weird woman. Sometimes, you're still a bit unsure of how special you are--"

 

"all of the time," you interjected.

 

"--but, I trust that you'll always return to my side. You'll return to who you really are," he lightly poked the tip of your nose with the smallest of grins, "so don't doubt yourself anymore."

 

You touched his face. "I don't know what I'd do without you here to bring me back to my senses."

 

"You kicked me back to my senses enough when we were first going out. Now it's my turn," Changbin proclaimed.

 

"Binnie?"

 

"Hm?"

 

"Can't you just come with me tonight?"

 

Changbin turned to you with a wide, warm smile.

 

"I love you babe, but I'm never going back to that hellhole."

 

*

 

You had entered your old high school in an elegant coffee-coloured one piece, a pretty little number that Changbin had helped you pick out. Many faces you barely recognized were crowded in the main cafeteria, which was cleared out and filled with tables of refreshments and upbeat music.

 

Rubbing your arm awkwardly and feeling quite out of place, you scanned around when you felt a tap on your shoulder.

 

You turned around to face none other than Jennie herself.

 

 

 

She had lost quite a bit of weight, her once chubby cheeks slimmed down into a petite face. Her style was impeccable in a tan trench coat and warm brown locks. When she smiled brightly at you, you realized that her signature peppiness hadn't disappeared at all.

 

"Ohmygod, it's been so long!" she suddenly tackled you in a hug, shaking you from side-to-side. "You look amazing!"

 

Oh, okay, so we're going in for the hug straightaway, you thought.

 

"No way, you're the stunning one," you assured, "thanks again for buying my admission ticket. You really didn't have to."

 

"No sweat darling, you deserved to come. $120 is nothing to me."

 

You blinked. $120 big ones per person, how is that no sweat? And what - I 'deserved' to come? 

 

"Hey, come meet some of the others from our old group, they're over there," she smoothly grabbed your hand and hurried over to them.

 

"Hey guys, guess who I brought!"

 

You held your breath when you saw the familiar faces. There was the ace cheerleader-slash-Japanese transfer student, Sana, the heartthrob jock Kai, the flirty Taehyung, the "bro" Vernon, and the cold Irene.

 

As you took in the familiar faces, you tried your best to smile. "Hey. Long time."

 

Sana ran over to hug you as if you had never lost touch before. "Oh my goooood! I missed you so much!"

 

I'm sure you did, even though I barely knew you, you faked a smile.

 

"You haven't changed," Kai smirked. "Your height."

 

Vernon snickered. "Still Little Miss Tiny, huh?" 

 

You pursed your lips but forced a laugh. "Little Miss Tiny" used to be your old nickname, handcrafted by the boys. They would relentlessly tease you for your short height, making your confidence in the height department minimize with every "harmless" joke they uttered, even when you had told them to stop.

 

"Tiny? You're the perfect height for me," Changbin had said when you'd first brought up the topic, "I'm not that tall either, you know. We can be the tiny couple."

 

You smiled softly to yourself, recalling that moment for a split second before it was interrupted by a flirtatious whistle.

 

"Well, well, well. Look who joined the party," Taehyung grinned. "Classy dress."

 

"Lay off, Tae, she's taken," Jennie rolled her eyes. She turned to you, "Although hey, I still don't know who by."

 

"Yeah, who's the lucky man?" Sana whispered close to you with insistent eyes.

 

I'm surprised you all even care, you thought, trying to rack your brain for possible ways to get out of answering. Thankfully, you were cut off once again.
 

Taehyung gawked. "She's taken? No way! And here I thought nuns stayed s forever!" 

 

Sana playfully smacked Taehyung's shoulder. "Hey, there are couples who are celibate."

 

"Yeah, ok. What is this, 1920? Everyone has , Sana." Taehyung rolled his eyes.

 

"Nun?" Irene raised an eyebrow with a haughty smirk. "Oh, because she was so against booze and parties."

 

"Didn't you get knocked out on one sip of beer? You know, that one time at Jackson's party - second year."

 

"That's right! I remember now - your second nickname was the 'holy nun'!" Vernon clapped his hands in raucous laughter.

 

"Hey, are you still against booze?" Kai handed a glass of wine over to you. "If not, I think there's some soda over at that table."

 

Your ears flushed red in embarrassment. You wanted to hide in a hole, but you recalled Changbin's encouragement and straightened up confidently. You'd come here for a reason. You were here because you wanted to be here, you'd wanted to enjoy one last night in high school.

 

"No, I can drink it."

 

Kai gave you an unusually concerned look. "You sure?"

 

You nodded.
 

"Chug, chug, chug!" Taehyung and Vernon chanted.

 

In one gulp, you downed the wine like a barbaric champ, wiping your lips with the back of your hand.

 

Little Miss Tiny a.k.a The Holy Nun was a changed woman.

 

An odd, uncertain feeling swirled inside you when Taehyung and the rest gave you approving pats on the back and annoyingly loud cheers that attracted tons of stares from the other alumni.

 

"I'll pour you another!" Taehyung filled up your glass.

 

Irene snorted. "Really, is that anything to applaud about?"

 

*

 

The night just seemed to be dragging on for hours.

 

It came to a point where you didn't really give a damn about who was married to whom and who was pregnant with whoever's baby. You had absolutely zero interest in what richly paying job Jennie had, or Vernon's third failed business. Heck, you just wanted to go home. You missed home. Being physically back at the school was also adding to the fact that everything seemed like a terrifying time slip back to teenage days, and as the hours went by, the more you began to regret it.

 

Also, was it just you, or was your head buzzing a bit?

 

"Hey, I'm gonna take a breather. I'll be back," you announced to the table. Nobody seemed to care - they were all invested in Irene's story about how her boyfriend's new luxury car was totaled by a family friend.

 

After what seemed like minutes on end, you began to lose track of time. You managed to sit down on one of the marble ledges in the hallway beside the school's trophy cases, massaging your temples.

 

I need to go home, you thought.

 

Just then, a bottle of water appeared in front of your face. You gratefully took it.

 

"Thank you--"

 

When you peered upwards, you blinked to see none other than the school's old alleged heartthrob eyeing you amusedly. In a low voice that would've usually made teenage girls melt, Kai pointed to the empty space beside you.

 

"May I?"

 

You nodded as he took a seat.

 

"I knew you couldn't handle your booze," Kai began, thick lips coiled into a smirk, "but you've gotten better."

 

You were beginning to sound exasperated now, and the damn ear ringing wouldn't stop. "It's been ten years, Jongin."

 

His smile slipped from his face, but you were too preoccupied to notice. "Oh. Um, right."

 

Another silence that you were thankful for. You were not in the mood to talk.

 

"You know, I always wondered why you called me that."

 

"What?"

 

"Everyone called me Kai, but you're the only one that called me Jongin."

 

"It's your name," you said.

 

Kai pressed his lips together. "I mean... It always made me feel like... I mean, I thought that you thought I was, um, special... to you, I guess."

 

You didn't say anything.

 

"See, like you call Hansol 'Vernon.' And Joohyun 'Irene.'"

 

"Because I'm not close to them."

 

"Right." Kai mulled over that. "So... I guess I'm trying to say that I... I mean, I know I teased you sometimes, but I tried to get the others to not tease you too much, but your reactions were cute, so when we were in school I really liked--and possibly I still do like--"

 

"I'm gonna stop you there, Kai. I'm flattered, but I really can't accept your confession."

 

When he heard you say his nickname, his expectant smile fell.

 

"Why... not?"

 

You stared at him for a long time.

 

"I have a boyfriend."

 

"I heard. So? Has he known you longer than I have?"

 

You can say that, you thought, but remained silent.

 

"See? He doesn't have the same history like you and I do. I know you better than anyone, probably more than him."

 

Now you were getting ticked off. Who did this guy think he was? He avoided you for ten years and now showed up demanding for his feelings to be reciprocated?

 

"I can treat you better. Who is that guy? He's not from our school, is he? What's his name?" Kai pelted you with relentless questions.

 

"Look, I--"

 

Just in the nick of time, someone shouted your name down the hallway. You and Kai stood up to see Jennie waving you over with a wide grin.

 

"Hey, someone's here to pick you up!"

 

"What? I didn't call for anyone," you mumbled. And then it dawned on you.

 

You turned to leave but Kai grabbed your wrist. "Hey, hey, you can't leave me hanging."

 

"Let me go, Kai," you pulled your arm away and glared at him in irritation. "You know what you did."

 

Heart pounding, you left behind a confused Kai and hurried over to where Jennie was, entering the cafeteria again. As soon as you turned inside, he was sitting towards the sides of the wall, standing out from the formally dressed people in his too-casual jean jacket hoodie and black pants, resting with his elbows against his knees.

 

 

"Hey," Jennie poked you with her elbow mischievously, "is that the mysterious boyfriend?"

 

"It's Binnie," you said incredulously. He came for me. Even though he hates these kinds of events, he came.

 

As if hearing your quiet voice, Changbin glanced up and locked gazes with you. His uncomfortable expression immediately melted away into a relieved one, beckoning you over with a smile. The pain in your head seemed to dull a bit.

 

As you approached him, the alcohol had completely kicked in, with a dizzy sensation washing over you. You had definitely overdone it on the alcohol, and teetered dangerously on edge.

 

Changbin immediately dove in and caught you before you fell. He could smell the alcohol on you from a mile away. With startled eyes, he leaned in. "Did you drink?"

 

You groaned, massaging your temples again. "I was forced to."

 

"Good god, we'd better get going then," Changbin chuckled, despite himself. He already had your purse and coat in tow. "Unless you still wanted to stay?"

 

You met eyes with him, your gaze telling him everything he needed to know.

 

"Right you are," he picked up your coat and carried your purse for you. "Let's go, baby."

 

You stepped towards a bewildered Jennie, who was eyeing Changbin incredulously.

 

"Sorry, Jen. I think I overdid it on the booze. I'm gonna call it a night. Can you tell the others I said bye?"

 

"Oh, um, sure." Jennie, still ogling Changbin, snapped out of her trance and leaned in towards you with an excited smile. "You gonna introduce me?"

 

"Oh, yeah, this is, uh," you shot a questioning look to him before he gave your hand a reassuring squeeze, "my boyfriend, Seo Changbin."

 

Changbin brusquely nodded in greeting. "Hey."

 

"Changbin?" Jennie blinked before going silent a bit. "That name seems familiar."

 

That was your cue to leave. Quickly pushing Changbin out the door, you gave another fake smile. "Okay, nice seeing you again, Jen, maybe I'll see you soon--"

 

WHAM! You had shoved Changbin into another guy's chest, and he cringed upon contact. "Ow."

 

You tore your attention away from Jennie and to Changbin. "Oh no, I'm sorry, are you ok, Binnie?"

 

"I'm fine."

 

The pair of you glanced upwards to see the taller Kai at the doorway. At once, Changbin straightened his stance, but you could feel his muscles tense up.

 

The pair stared each other square in the face as Kai eyed both him, you, and your intertwined hands.

 

You shut your eyes in defeat. Oh no.

 

"Hey, Miss Tiny, stop right there!"

 

You glanced back to see Taehyung, Vernon, Sana and Irene approaching you. Thanks to Taehyung's loud shouts, everyone in the cafeteria was staring at you. This was the worst it could get.

 

"How could you leave without saying goodbye to your old pals?" Vernon feigned anger.

 

"Yeah, and we still didn't get introduced to your man," Sana flashed her pearly whites. Even Irene looked interested.

 

Kai let out a sound of amusement, but his eyes were burning with jealousy. "Huh. So he's your boyfriend. Hey, what's your name?"

 

"Ah!" Jennie clapped her hands together. "Seo Changbin, don't tell me you're that Changbin--!"

 

Kai frowned. "Changbin? Wait, wasn't that the loner? That emo kid?"

 

"The creepy one with the long hair who always stared at the girls!" Taehyung gaped. "With the lame anime obsession!"

 

"No way! That was you?" Sana gasped. "But you look so... stylish now!"

 

"Hey, are you still obsessed with anime?"

 

"How did you end up nabbing The Holy Nun?"

 

"If I knew you'd turn out like this, I would've approached you back in high school."

 

That was the last straw. Changbin turned around and yelped your name, but it was too late. You had snatched Irene's full wineglass and downed it in two seconds flat. That dulled everything. The pain and the ringing were temporarily gone. Right now, you were on an all time adrenaline rush, and your courage swelled up.

 

"F..." You said.

 

"F?" The group exchanged curious glances.

 

"F...ucking annoying, all of you."

 

Everyone instantly shut their mouths.

 

"Yeah," you scoffed. "I'll ing curse if I want to. Not so holy now, am I?"

 

Changbin made to touch your arm gently. "Hey..."

 

You shook him off. "Don't, Changbin. I'm preaching the truth tonight."

 

Changbin zipped his mouth shut and obediently stepped away, hands behind his back.

 

"You lot," you pointed around at the group, "don't you have anything better to do than to just, oh, i don't know, gossip about who did what? I got news for 'ya. Who the cares? Y'all should be ashamed of yourself - you're in your late 20s and you're still gossiping over high school classmates? What a joke."

 

"Oi, Kim Taehyung," you shoved your finger at him.

 

Taehyung blinked and pointed to himself.

 

"Yeah, you! You gotta go around humping whoever has a pair of s, don't you? Were you born a catcaller? Grow up. Get settled man. You're too old for this . It's honestly sad to see."

 

Irene was next. You swung your arm over to her, and she cringed in disgust.

 

"Hey, Bae Joohyun. The queen bee. Every girl wanted to be like you, you know? Pretty little thing. But listen, listen - here's a question - why do you have to walk around like you've got an eternal stick up your ? Why don't you stop for a sec and imagine something for me: a world where you don't have to frown at everything. Where every woman is a fellow friend, not an enemy. That world would be a much better place."

 

"CHOI HANSOL!" you barked.

 

Vernon stepped back, shocked.

 

"You punk. You're one year younger than us. How long are you gonna worship these jerks? Are you gonna be the maknae who follows everyone forever? Come to think of it, you were the first one to tease my height and give me those stupid nicknames. You little brat. Respect your elders."

 

"Sana," you let out a laugh. You were having way too much fun now. "Minatozaki Sana!"

 

"H-Hai! (Y-Yes!)" she blurted in Japanese.

 

"OK, I'll admit. You were fine. Mostly."

 

Sana relaxed a bit.

 

"But hey, why you gotta be so fake? To be honest, we weren't friends. Now you're going on pretending we were best pals when we weren't. What the ?"

 

Sana trembled and avoided your gaze.

 

You sighed. "Jennie."

 

"M-Me?" Jennie stared at you, shocked that she'd be included in this call-out. You waved her over. Jennie cautiously approached you.

 

"You were the most normal out of them. I actually thought of you as a close friend."

 

Jennie softened.

 

"But now, now look at what being with them has done to you. You gossiped the most today. You flaunted your riches and shoved it in my face. I thought you buying my ticket was a gesture out of kindness, but no, you were bragging to everyone that you were the one that allowed me to attend because you bought my ticket. Who do you think you are?"

 

You shook your head. "I thought coming here today would mean I could spend time again with the old Jennie Kim. 'Course, everyone's changed, but I'd never imagined you of all people to change for the worse. Out of all of these jerks, you're the one I'm disappointed with the most."

 

Jennie looked hurt, but couldn't say anything to refute. It was all true.

 

"I'm not done yet."

 

You turned to Kai. "Kim Jongin. You're the main reason why I hesitated about attending."

 

Kai furrowed his eyebrows. "What do you mean? I was always nice to yo--"

 

"Yes," you contemplated, "you were nice. But that was the problem. Aside from the few times you too followed the crowd and teased me, you were only nice to me. You were every girl's dream boy. But when it came to anyone else, you bullied them like a ."

 

You stepped towards him as he stepped back, slightly intimidated. "You know why I can't accept your confession? It's not just because I have a boyfriend and you light no candle to him. It's because my boyfriend is Seo Changbin. The one everyone bullied, teased, and picked on. The one who didn't even want to come to this stupid reunion but came for me anyways. The one that was misunderstood by everyone. And you, Jongin, were the ringleader of it all. Do you remember? When you humiliated him in front of the school. When you would kick him around to do your bidding."

 

The blurry memories were coming back to Kai.

 

"The final person I'm exposing is me. I was fake, too. I followed you all to survive in high school, I tried to fit into your standards, even though I disliked every one of you at some point. That's why when you told me that you knew me better than Changbin does, Jongin - I wanted to laugh. Because I've never been honest like this to you guys even once. You don't know me. You never did, and you've never attempted to reach out and get to know me after we graduated. I've realized it now. I was stupid to have come here and try to fit in again."

 

The liquid courage had worn off as you groaned and clutched your head. The shrill ringing was back. "Ow..."

 

Changbin reached out and calmly kept you steady with an arm. "It's alright. It's ok, now."

 

"I'm tired, Binnie."

 

"Ok. I'll take you home," he murmured softly. "Can you walk?"

 

You nodded, eyelids getting heavy. Changbin helped you out the door, but before he did, he glanced back at the others, who were still staring in silence.

 

"If she doesn't want to come next year, which I doubt she will, I won't be sending her again. Pleasure meeting you all."

 

The both of you were off.

 

With a bit of walking, Changbin guided you close to the school's main entrance, he cussed when he saw it was snowing outside.

 

He attempted to help you with your coat, but you were practically half asleep now. "Can you wait for me here? I'll heat up the car and bring it to the front."

 

"I want to sleep."

 

"Not here, baby. Hold on," he slung your purse around his arm. "I don't want you to be cold..."

 

His mind mulled over how he'd bring you home. Just as he thought about picking you up and heaving you to the car with brute force, a voice came from behind him.

 

"Here, give me her things, I'll help her inside the car."

 

Jennie, who was wearing her coat, was already taking the purse from Changbin's arm.

 

She didn't glance once at his surprised face. "You'd better pick her up before she falls asleep on the floor."

 

Changbin blinked but obeyed as Jennie helped you up on his back. She led the way as he carried you out the doors and into the parking lot.

 

"Aren't you going to stay back with them?" he finally questioned.

 

"If I want to stay true to the old Jennie Kim, I'm gonna have to start making some changes to my friend circles now," she gave him an awkward smile. "And uh, apologizing to you both would be the first step."

 

Changbin's expression morphed into a soft smile. "That's something she'll need to hear when she's sober."

 

"Next Tuesday then. Tell her I'll text her about it."

 

"I will."

 

*

 

The next morning, you had only one thing on your mind.

 

"Water.... Waaaaterrr...."

 

"Son of a," Changbin turned around and jumped when he saw you dragging yourself around the house from the floor. "What are you, Sadako from The Ring? At least walk like a normal human being!"

 

Your fingers coiled around his ankles as he cringed.

 

"Waaaaaterrrrrrr...."

 

"Ok, ok," Changbin helped you up and helped you to the sofa, where you sprawled out. He quickly poured a glass and hurried over to you.

 

You immediately gulped it down with a relieved sigh. "What were you even doing in the kitchen?"

 

"Making you porridge. And some hangover soup."

 

You made a noise of approval.

 

"So, are you finally back?" Changbin said amusedly.

 

You leaned on his shoulder with your eyes closed. "What do you mean?"

 

"From that outburst at the reunion. Or do you not remember?"

 

"Outburst..." You trailed off. "Wait. That seriously happened?"

 

Changbin suppressed a laugh. "Fortunately, yes. And it was awesome."

 

"No, I thought that was all a dream. And then Kai told me he liked me and then I was like hell no and then you came when you'd actually never come to that kind of thing and then I told Irene--"

 

"That she has an eternal stick up her ?" he raised an amused eyebrow.

 

"Oh, ," you said. It was silent.

 

"Well. I am never going back to that reunion ever again. Let's just... not ever go back to that town at all. Better yet, change our names. Forge our identities. Changbin, you're no longer Changbin. You're, uh, just Bin."

 

"Pretty minimalistic name. I can pull it off."

 

You sighed and hugged him tightly. His familiar scent made you feel at ease. You were right where you were meant to be.

 

"Can we just stay home and watch movies today?"

 

"Of course, Missus Bin."

 

"Ha, ha, very funny, Mister Bin."

 

"Let's actually watch Mister Bean tonight. Yeah?"

 

"I don't know why you like his movies so much. But whatever."

 

"I'm just kidding," Changbin laughed and kissed the top of your head. "Hey, you wanna watch that new season of Naruto that came out? Boruto?"

 

"Ugh. Bring back Mr. Bean, please."

 

"Ok, we'll watch an episode of your romance anime too. Or a drama? Whichever."

 

"Deal," you instantly agreed and lay down on his lap with a beam. Changbin pinched your cheek adoringly and reached over to grab the remote.

 

From inside your room, your phone buzzed with a new text message.