Minseok woke up to the lazy sound of his alarm perched on top of his bedside table. He wasn't lacking in sleep (he's sure he slept enough to recover from the past two nights prior) nor was he specifically tired the night before, but it still took him a while to pick himself up from the bed. His limbs felt heavy with lead and light like jelly at the same time. Instinctively, his right hand went up to place a light touch to his chest. There was no burn or pain, and he sighed to himself before making his way out of his room.

 

It was his turn to make breakfast and out of habit he prepared food enough for three people. There was no doubt that another person will come to their apartment just in time for breakfast.

 

"Minnie. What are we having for breakfast?"

 

He didn't need to turn to see who spoke. His big brother let out a soft yawn before draping himself behind Minseok. Nimble fingers reached at his sides in an attempt to tickle him but with no success. After failing on his first attempt, the man behind Minseok reached for one of the sausages cooling on the plate next to the stove and promptly put it in his mouth.

 

"Hyung! Just go and shower!" Minseok said in what he hoped to be an annoyed tone but with his older brother smiling to him as he pulled away, he knew that his words held no venom.

 

"Stingy!"

 

His older brother scrunched up his face at him, acting far too childish for someone who's two years older than Minseok. Unconsciously, his eyes trailed from his brother's face to his pale chest. As always, he wasn't wearing a top and it left the dark on his chest visible against almost white skin. The three Chinese characters embedded to his skin like it had always belonged there. It always looked beautiful no matter how many times Minseok had seen it. It may have looked like pitch black right now, but he still remembered how the skin looked raw and almost bleeding the first time he had laid eyes on those very same characters. It was hard to make out the at first but when the redness of the skin subsided a bit, the characters (吴亦凡)  looked proud against pale skin.

 

After sticking his tongue out, his brother finally disappeared to the bathroom, making him reluctantly tear his eyes away from the beautiful mark. It wasn't the first time he had seen a name on someone's chest, after all his parents have each other's names on their chests, but his brother's is his first time seeing bright red skin turn into a shade of beautiful black. Though it did take a little more than five months for the skin to calm down and decided that it would rather be black than red.

 

"Morning!"

 

And here comes their constant visitor. Minseok just finished with the last plate of food and turned around to greet the tall male standing next to the table.

 

"Morning, Yi Fan-hyung." he greeted back. 

 

The tall blonde walked next to the stove to help Minseok carry the rest of the food to the table. The corner of his eyes caught the tips of the black characters peeking through the low neckline of the shirt Yi Fan was wearing. Minseok only saw the name on Yi Fan's chest during the few times the older was wearing a loose tank top or the rare times he chanced him putting on a shirt. But it was enough for him to admire the equally beautiful characters of his older brother's name on the older Chinese. The 김준면 just quietly there and giving a sort of finality that they belong to each other.

 

Yi Fan went ahead to set the table while Minseok decided to clear up the mess in the kitchen while they wait for Junmyeon so they can all eat together. The older Chinese had become such a familiar sight in their small apartment with how often he came over. He practically lived there together with the Kim Brothers.

 

In another five minutes, Junmyeon finally emerged back to the kitchen and Yi Fan instantly broke into a wide grin despite his default stoic face. His older brother automatically welcomed himself in Yi Fan's open arms and tucked himself there. It looked like two pieces of a puzzle that fit so well. Minseok always felt envious with how perfect the scene looked. Junmyeon was perfect for Yi Fan and Yi Fan was perfect for Junmyeon. He wouldn't wish any other person to be his older brother's soulmate.

 

Though he did bear an unfounded hatred to his brother's soulmate, way back before he had met the guy that looked at Junmyeon as if he was the world.

 

They live in both a romantic yet harsh reality. In a world where the name of your soulmate burns on your skin on the night of your 18th birthday. Every person that had experienced it described it as a blinding kind of pain, akin to a hot searing knife continuously stabbed to your chest for the entirety of the night. Once the pain had ceased to assault the senses, a name would be left engraved on their chest.

 

During the night of Junmyeon's 18th birthday, Minseok had offered his help on assisting with his older brother. They had a room in the house which was soundproofed mainly for this reason. Junmyeon was nervous and didn't manage to sleep before the clock chimed at midnight. The moment the second hand had struck the 12th number, Junmyeon had writhed in the bed. He was holding his voice at first, but that only worked for a good three minutes before he was screaming his lungs out and desperately clawing at his chest. His pale skin was starting to turn bright red and his eyes pooled with tears begging to the air for it to stop but of course it didn't. His mother and father together with a sixteen year old Minseok did their best to restrain Junmyeon from further hurting himself with how violently he was thrashing on the bed. Minseok was terrified. He had heard countless stories about it, but seeing it first hand and happening to his brother left him images in his head he would never want to revisit.

 

He didn't know when they fell asleep, but they all did due to exhaustion. Minseok was able to take a glance at Junmyeon's chest before his mother had wrapped him in bandages. It was hard to make anything out from the redness. It all looked like nonsense scratches when he first saw it. He was finally able to have a clearer view of the characters on his brother's chest when the bandages came off after a couple of days. It still looked red but at least they can now see what it says. Or hoped to understand it.

 

Unlike their parents who both have Korean characters imprinted on their chests, the red letters on Junmyeon's chest looked nothing Korean. Minseok didn't know if it was Chinese or Japanese but after a bit of research, courtesy of their family members, they finally managed to enunciate the swollen red marks.

 

"Wu Yi Fan?"

 

The name rolled on Junmyeon's tongue far better than when Minseok had tried to say it. It felt familiar on Junmyeon's lips for reasons Minseok couldn't explain. After his older brother had said the name, a small tug on his lips finally managed to creep on Junmyeon's face. 

 

His parents had been a bit vague when they tried to explain to Minseok about the sudden gloom on Junmyeon's face after coming to from the ordeal of that night. His cheerful older brother had looked like an empty husk when he woke up. He didn't talk for the entire day and the smile on his lips had completely abandoned him. He would always touch his chest and grip at it even if Minseok knows that it was still hurting. His mother said that Junmyeon is feeling a sort of emptiness now that the name had been introduced in his life.

 

As soon as Junmyeon was better, the older boy did his best to search for the person owning that name, despite the word of advice from their father. The head of the Kim household had tried to tell Junmyeon that it will be almost impossible for him to find the person until the name changed from red to black. According to them, the mark would remain red until the other person reached their 18th birthday and had the other person's name engraved on their chest. It will be a tough search with all the people with the name, at least if Junmyeon can find this "Wu Yi Fan" with his name on their chest it will be a sure find. Seeing that the characters 吴亦凡 still looked bright red even after a week, their parents have concluded that Junmyeon had received the markings first. It didn't stop Junmyeon from searching though.

 

Junmyeon continued to attend college, not going slack with trying to search for a person he have no clue about except for the name. He even enrolled himself to some Chinese classes in an attempt to fill the void in his chest. Junmyeon looked miserable and the helplessness Minseok felt led him to hate the person he knew nothing about. He wanted this "Wu Yi Fan" to hurry up and find his brother and to bring him back to the person that he was.

It was around the end of the first week of November when Junmyeon came home panicked. He mostly stayed in the university dormitory so they were all taken by surprise when he started banging the door in the middle of the night.

 

"Junmyeon. Honey, what's wrong?"

 

Their mother immediately cupped Junmyeon's cheeks and urged him to form words even while he was murmuring and his hands kept on the fabric of his shirt.

 

"Mom... it's... it's black."

 

That was all he managed to say before he was murmuring incoherent words again. Junmyeon slept in the house that night and for the rest of the week, far too unstable to stay alone in the dormitory. He didn't mind the tiring travel distance every day, he needed to be home where he can be with his family.

 

They were once again disturbed by the loud banging on the door in the morning a week after Junmyeon's hasty arrival. Their mother quickly opened the door just as Minseok and Junmyeon were coming down the stairs. Minseok only had a few seconds to process what was happening before a tall boy was walking past their mother at the door and straight to the staircase and immediately wrapping Junmyeon in a bone crushing embrace in which his brother had returned without a second thought.

 

When the two boys were calm enough to release each other from the embrace that had lasted for more than a few minutes, their parents have ushered them to the sofa. They complied but the tall blonde boy refused to let go of Junmyeon's hand.

 

The blonde boy shamelessly pulled his shirt up, revealing the black print on his chest. Beautiful of the name 김준면 only starting to turn black and was still red around the edges. The conversation started in a rough manner. The Chinese boy not knowing a single Korean word but "Annyeong~" and Junmyeon's Chinese wasn't that fluent for a conversation yet.

 

Minseok had instantly forgot about his immature hatred for the Chinese boy when he saw how he looked at his older brother like he was the entire world. It was almost impossible to tear Yi Fan away from Junmyeon. Their hands locked at all times and hugging each other like finally filling in each other's void. 

 

Yi Fan's parents arrived in the evening, but they also lack the means for a proper conversation. Though, one look at the new found pair and both pair of parents understood that there was no separating the two.

 

It was a very rough start but Yi Fan's parents arranged the papers for Yi Fan's transfer in Junmyeon's university. They did their best to study each other's language and now after more than a year, they're finally able to communicate comfortably.

 

"Enough with the cuddling and let's eat." Minseok finally voiced out after he had enough of the couple and thought it best to break them up before the ants find their way to them.

 

Yi Fan gave Junmyeon a peck on the lips before they both sat down to eat. 

 

"Hyung, you're in charge with the dishes today. Don't leave them in the sink. I'm leaving now. I have a class at 9 a.m. Bye." With that Minseok jogged out of their small apartment, leaving the couple still seated on the table.

 

Junmyeon let out a depressed sigh as soon as Minseok was out the door. Yi Fan put a comforting arm around his back, trying to pull him close to tuck him under his chin.

 

"Did it really not happen?" Yi Fan asked. His words were guarded, almost afraid to push too much and further dampen Junmyeon's mood.

 

"It didn't. We waited the whole night but there was nothing. We even waited the following night but again there was nothing. I suggested waiting one more night but Minseok pushed the idea away that's why we came back here last night." Junmyeon sighed again. "I don't know what's wrong Yi Fan. It was supposed to happen. Why didn't it? Why?"

 

"I wish I have the answer Myeon." Yi Fan said, Junmyeon's hair in an attempt to give him comfort. "How's Minseok though?"

 

"He's acting like nothing's wrong but I noticed how he kept touching his chest and I don't even know what to say to him so I just pretend to be normal, too." Junmyeon fisted Yi Fan's shirt and murmured "I wish I know how to help him. Or even to know what's going on, so I can at least explain it to him. I want Minseok to find his other half... like how you found me."

 

"I wish for that, too, Junmyeon. Like how I found you."

 

~*~

 

Minseok was sitting in class again after taking a leave of absence for the past two days. He and his brother made the trip back home to prepare for the night of Minseok's 18th birthday. But for some unexplained reason, it didn't come. He was expecting for the pain to kick in at exactly 12 a.m. like how it was with Junmyeon. But the clock chimed at 12... at 1... at 2 until eventually the sun's light seeped in through the windows but there was no blinding pain. No stab of heat at his chest. Nothing.

 

They decided to wait another night, just to see how it'll go and Minseok was hoping that it would come this time. But like the previous night there was nothing. Junmyeon suggested for another night, but Minseok knew it would just be pointless so they made their way back to their apartment near the university.

 

He tried to act nonchalant about it, but negative thoughts penetrated his mind whenever he would let his guard down. What if he will never have a mark? What if he was destined to be alone forever? What if his soulmate died before they even turned the age? Hundreds of what if popped in his thought as he unconsciously clutched at his still very blank chest.

 

Suddenly, he can't breathe. An invisible weight had settled on his chest and something was clawing behind his eyes. The thought of being alone and incomplete. He didn't know it would hurt so much to feel so empty. Now he understood why Junmyeon had been so down during those six months. But the void in him was different from his brother's. Junmyeon's was the absence of his other half. Minseok's was a gaping hole.

 

The professor droned on and on about some war that happened some hundred years ago. Everything, nothing but white sound as Minseok tries not to cry during class.

 

~*~

 

It had been more than a week since Minseok turned 18. He learned about keeping himself distracted in order to forget about his worries. He didn't mope or cry. He managed to busy himself with school, and the constant company of his brother helped him find comfort.

 

April was starting and they rarely talk about the absence of Minseok's mark. It was a sensitive topic and Minseok doesn't really want to think about it because he knows it just won't matter. There was nothing they can do because they don't know the reason why the marks didn't appear. They tried to resume their lives, just like how they were before that night on the 26th of March.

 

Minseok reached home at some time past seven one night. He found a long figure slouched over the coffee table, busy taking notes and failing to notice Minseok's arrival.

 

"Yi Fan-hyung?"

 

The older finally looked up and smiled at the sight of Minseok. There were black rimmed glasses perched atop Yi Fan's nose which the older always wore whenever he was studying. His blonde locks were a mess, probably from threading his own fingers over it so many times as the older read page after page from his books.

 

"I already bought take out. We can eat when you want." Yi Fan casually declared before tidying up the notebooks and books scattered on the small table. He also removed his glasses and neatly folded them on top of the pile of study materials.

 

Minseok didn't ask. He simply went to his room to drop his school things and change. He knows that his older brother will be staying out tonight to do a group project. He was prepared to whip up a quick dinner for himself expecting to be alone after a long while of having constant company. He wasn't prepared to find the older Chinese in the house, with dinner waiting for him.

 

The older was taking out the food from the take out container when Minseok emerged out of his room. Surprisingly, Yi Fan discovered a liking to Korean made Chinese food. He once said that it tasted different than the food back in China and insisted that they eat it whenever it's his turn to decide on the food. They ate in silence both of them not much of a speaker and it was rather a comfortable type of silence. After tidying up the dishes, Yi Fan casually went to the bathroom to clean up and change into his sleepwear. As the older was settling back to the coffee table and once again pulling at his notebooks, Minseok finally found it in him to ask.

 

"Yi Fan-hyung. Why are you here?"

 

It wasn't like he found the older's presence uncomfortable. He was far too used to seeing him around. Junmyeon and Yi Fan made it a must to keep him company whenever possible and Minseok appreciates that. But seeing the Chinese without his older brother was a different case. Especially since it appears to be that Yi Fan will be staying the night as well, while Junmyeon is clearly staying out.

 

Yi Fan gave him a soft glance before tapping the space next to him on the floor. Confused, Minseok sank down next to the older and fixed a confused stare back at him. There was a certain softness in the blonde boy's expression despite the sharp look of his features. It wasn't very hard to see him as another older brother for Minseok.

 

"Junmyeon doesn't want to leave you alone." The older started. "He really wanted to skip going to that project making of theirs."

 

"...why?" Minseok asked, though even he thinks it was a stupid question. He knows that his brother can be such a worrywart but even he thinks it's too much for him to try and skip school work or even ask his boyfriend to accompany him. He's not a kid anymore. He's a grown up and he just turned 18 last week. He can very well be alone for one night. He isn't worth the trouble of having Yi Fan stay the night.

 

"Junmyeon didn't ask me to stay here, if that's what you're thinking. I volunteered myself. I know he'll just worry himself to death if he went out tonight and you're here alone. Or you'll just nag him to death if he chose to stay with you. Either way, it's a threat to his life and I don't want that." Minseok was thankful for the joking tone. It makes the atmosphere a bit lighter than when they started this conversation. Plus, the lighthearted chuckle of the taller man eased him up a bit.

 

"Thanks." That was all he can say at the moment. He wouldn't admit it but he doesn't want to be completely alone. He feels so vulnerable and he wasn't sure how he'll be if he's left alone with nothing but his thoughts. Ever since that night one week ago, a fear grew in him. The fear of being alone. Forever. And somehow, the thoughts of being alone, even for a while, terrified him.

 

Minseok occupied himself by staring at his hands on top of his lap. He didn't want to meet the older's eyes in fear that he will see right through him. How dependent he became of their company. He doesn't want to be a burden to anyone but at the same time, he's not brave enough to tell them that he'll be just fine alone. He was honestly scared. He thought he had hid it well, but the fact that they're having this conversation meant that he failed at it. His palms were starting to sweat and he rubbed them furiously over the fabric of his pajama pants when he felt an arm around his shoulder pulling him closer to the older. It was a familiar gesture. Yi Fan always did that with Junmyeon, but it was his first time being the receiving end of that comforting arm. Surprisingly, it didn't feel awkward. It felt oddly comforting. But it also made him think about thoughts he wanted to bury in his mind.

 

"We're worried about you because you're acting like we shouldn't be." Yi Fan said after Minseok relaxed in his arms. Minseok was taking the issue far too calmly to be real. Junmyeon and Yi Fan knew how much Minseok looked forward to knowing the name of his other half. He had always expressed how he liked seeing the couple together. And honestly, they wanted to see Minseok find his own soulmate and feel the completeness they did when they met each other.

 

Minseok shifted until his forehead was leaning on Yi Fan's shoulder. He released a shaky breath and stayed silent. The feeling of warm wetness on Yi Fan's shoulder was reason enough for him to wrap his other arm around the small shaking figure next to him.

 

~*~

 

Minseok thought he looked miserable enough. Yi Fan even suggested that he skip his first class today because the redness around his eyes was still very obvious. If Junmyeon had seen him, there's no doubt that his older brother will fuss over him to no end. He had made Yi Fan promise him not to tell his older brother about his unplanned pity party last night, at least not today. He thought that with his pale face and still red eyes that he will look like the most miserable person in the entire campus, but sitting there in his first class proved him otherwise.

 

He looked so pale, like he hadn't been sleeping for the past few days. Shoulders slumped like there's an unseen weight hovering over him. His supposed to be pretty lips is clearly dry and chapped. The dark brown locks of his hair would've looked beautiful if it didn't lack the glow and shine. His eyes were only half open, probably because he was crying the night before. The image reminded him so much of how Junmyeon looked like before Yi Fan came banging at their door. Minseok felt more miserable when he saw the boy from across the room. It somehow broke his heart to see the boy sigh and shoulders slumping even lower than before.

 

Before he knows it, he was walking to close off their distance and stopped in front of the boy who was determined to keep his eyes trained on the desk.

 

"Hello." He greeted. Even he thinks that it's weird. He's not the type to start casual talk with strangers. He doesn't even start a conversation with most of his friends, he finds it more comfortable to listen to the talk around him. But here he is trying to talk to someone new in class who clearly doesn't want to be around people, much less talk to them.

 

After staring at his desk long enough to realize that Minseok isn't going to leave him alone, the boy finally looked up. Minseok didn't know before what it was like to get his breath knocked out of him, but now he's quite sure that those are the perfect words he's looking for to describe the feeling. Beyond the redness around his eyes, or the ghostly pale skin, he was beautiful. Big dark brown eyes, a small nose and thin lips, all fitted in his small face. Yes, he looked miserable, gloomy, depressed, whatever you want to call it, but he was beautiful and that's that.

 

Suddenly, he can't find his next words. So much for having a conversation then. He got even more tongue-tied when the boy's already big eyes grew wider at the sight of him, almost like there was recognition in his eyes. His lips quivered a bit, and with a shaky voice he spoke.

 

"Kim... Minseok?"

 

His mind almost skipped the part where the boy knew his name even if he haven't introduced himself, and almost went straight to appreciating how the small quiet voice tugged at his chest far too much than he prefers. Thankfully, his feet were still anchored to the ground, though he's not sure how long he can keep them on the floor with how much his stomach was fluttering like a million butterflies were trapped there.

 

"...yes? Uhm, do I know you?" Did that sound too rude? "I don't think I've introduced myself yet." There. I think that's better.

 

The boy let his eyes wander off of Minseok's face, but those brown orbs kept on finding Minseok's eyes. He released another shaky breath before speaking. "Lu Han. My name is Lu Han." He kept his eyes fixed on Minseok, like he was waiting for something, anything.

 

"I'm Minseok. Kim Minseok." he said in response. Even though, the boy - Lu Han - had already called out his name earlier, he felt the need to introduce himself again. It was hard to betray the look directed at him. There was obvious waiting etched in his gaze, but Minseok doesn't know what he's supposed to say other than his name.

 

The way Lu Han's eyes dropped from his face made Minseok feel like he had failed him with whatever it was the boy was expecting from him. Thinking that he had bothered the new student enough for one day, Minseok attempted to take a step back to retreat to his usual seat. The smallest shift in his step somehow shook Lu Han out from his solemn demeanor because the boy suddenly grabbed his wrist and shook his head desperately. The skin contact sent sparks on his skin, but in a good way. It felt right, having Lu Han hold his hand like that.

 

"Can I sit next to you?" he asked, Lu Han still has his wrist in a death grip but somehow the suggestion made him relax his hold a bit. The smallest of smiles managed to find their way to Lu Han's lips and he gave a timid nod. Minseok almost didn't want to take even a step away from the boy. Even the quick trip back to his old seat to retrieve his backpack proved to be a hard feat. Lu Han followed him with his eyes, almost as if he wanted to walk with Minseok even if the other was just walking a few chairs away.

 

They sat through class together, silently. Maybe Minseok was just imagining it, but sitting next to Lu Han somehow returned the boy's glow. He still looked pale and tired, but Lu Han would look at Minseok's direction from time to time to smile at him. His expression no longer like the gloom earlier.

 

~*~

 

"My name is written like this..." Lu Han started to say while they sit in the cafeteria. Minseok doesn't really want to part with his new found friend, especially since Lu Han seemed like he is now charged with new found energy. He always eat lunch with Junmyeon and Yi Fan whenever their schedules will allow it, and Minseok had invited Lu Han to eat with them.

 

Lu Han scribbled on his notebook the two Chinese characters for his name (鹿晗). He then gave Minseok that look. The look that is waiting for something.

 

"It looks pretty." Minseok stared at the two characters and honestly thought they were pretty against the white sheet. Lu Han stared at his eyes, like he was looking for something and sighed a moment later. It was a feeling hard to explain, like he somehow betrayed Lu Han's expectation of him. Since earlier, he had felt his heart break whenever Lu Han's eyes will show him that disappointed look. Minseok wished he would stop and just tell him straight out what his eyes are searching for, he wanted to tell him that, but of course he didn't.

 

"Minseok." He couldn't explain why, but he liked how his name sounded with Lu Han's voice. "Is your name written like this?" He started scribbling a set of Korean characters in the notebook. Just by watching him, it was obvious that he isn't used to writing in Korean, but it appears that he have the characters memorized enough. After writing it down, he then showed it back to Minseok.

 

김민석

 

It was nowhere near as pretty as when Lu Han had written his own name, but Minseok simply nodded at Lu Han's question, not sure how else to respond. The other gave him a confused stare and opened his mouth to speak, but before any more words are exchanged between them, someone had squeezed the living daylights out of Minseok.

 

"Minnie. Are you okay? Do you need anything? Is everything okay?" 

 

Minseok felt his cheeks squeezed in between cold hands, and the worried face of Junmyeon stared directly back at him. It appears that Yi Fan wasn't able to keep it from his older brother after all. Well, it wasn't like he was expecting to be able to keep it for long, Minseok just thought that maybe just until today.

 

"I'm just fine." He smiled back at his older brother to show him that he really is okay. Junmyeon searched his eyes and let the younger go when he was convinced enough that his brother meant what he said.

 

"I'm glad Yi Fan was there with you." Junmyeon said and returned Minseok's smile. "Oh, who's this? New friend?" 

 

Minseok turned and found Lu Han staring at them with wide eyes. He stared at Junmyeon and tried to pull his hand away from Minseok's wrist. He can almost see how the gears are clicking in Lu Han's head and Minseok didn't like where the other's thoughts are going.

 

"This is my older brother." Minseok blurted out. He didn't know why, but he didn't like the crest fallen look on Lu Han's face when he seemingly misunderstood the whole situation. He wanted Lu Han's hand to remain holding his wrist. He didn't want the other boy to let go. 

 

Upon realizing Minseok and Junmyeon's relationship, Lu Han broke into a smile and gave Minseok's wrist a light squeeze. That made Minseok incredibly happy and his heart quickened two beats faster.

 

~*~

 

From that day on, they were inseparable. They would sit next to each other during classes they take together. The rare times that they're not, they would constantly message each other and meet as soon as possible. Lu Han even dropped by Minseok's apartment whenever possible. Junmyeon and Yi Fan quickly accepted Lu Han's presence around Minseok and were honestly glad that there is someone next to the young Kim whenever they can't be with him.

 

Lu Han had told Minseok that he was supposed to transfer in Korea during the last week of March, but something happened which made him push it to a week later. Lu Han's transfer involves his love for soccer, which was a good thing because they get to spend their time together during club practice, since Minseok is also a part of the team. It just gave them more topic to talk about. They even bonded through watching soccer matches, being the best of buddies when they cheer for the same team and in a temporary war when they root for the opposing sides.

 

The first time they showered together after soccer practice, Minseok noticed how Lu Han followed him with his gaze. It made him self conscious to be honest. The faint blush on Lu Han's cheeks made him want to wear his shirt back on. He can almost feel the Chinese boy's gaze piercing holes at his back and it was getting really awkward. When he turned around, Lu Han didn't meet his eyes though. His friend just took a quick glance at some place below his face then his eyes drooped before he disappeared in one of the shower stalls. The Chinese boy's expression mirrored his look when they just met. The disappointment and the gloom present once again on his face. And after Lu Han had regained his glow, too. Minseok didn't expect to see that look on Lu Han again.

 

Minseok wanted to ask him. Ask Lu Han the meaning of all the disappointed look, the sighs, the sudden gloom in his eyes, but in the end he never asked. He was afraid of the reason behind it all. He clasped his still blank chest and wished for the hundredth time to see a name on it. A specific name this time.

 

~*~

 

"You will be alone forever!"

 

No! I don't want to be alone!

 

"You will never feel complete!"

 

No! No! Stop it!

 

"No one is destined for you!"

 

No! Please stop it!

 

"You. Are. Alone."

 

No! I'm not!

 

"Minseok!"

 

His eyes flew wide and his vision tried to focus on the worried face looming over him.

 

"Why are you crying?" Lu Han's fingers brushed over Minseok's cheeks, and that's when he realized that he had tears running down his face. His whole body was still shaking. The cold voice in his dream still ringing in his ears. Those were his fears, shouting loudly at him. The voice, why does it sound like that? Why? Why of all the voices does it have to be Lu Han's voice shouting at him in that cold tone? His shoulders shook violently as he recalled his dream. The cold voice tearing his chest apart. Leaving him raw and bleeding inside.

 

Without another word, Lu Han had enveloped Minseok in a hug, rubbing soothing circles on his back. Minseok grabbed a handful of Lu Han's shirt, completely aware that he's ruining the other boy's clothes, but at the moment he didn't care. He needed someone else's warmth. He needed to hear someone else's voice to drown the cold voice of his fears. He needed to feel Lu Han's warmth and make him forget the dream-Lu Han's cold cruel voice. He needed to remind himself which is real and which one is the dream. He desperately need to anchor himself and the best way to do it is to melt in Lu Han's arms.

 

He heard Lu Han hum an unfamiliar song next to his ear as he rocked them side to side to calm Minseok from his crying fit. The sweetness of Lu Han's voice was washing away the coldness in his chest. His shoulders started to relax, but his grip on Lu Han's shirt didn't loosen one bit. Their notes already forgotten on the table as Minseok clung desperately against Lu Han. The Chinese boy dropped lazy kisses at the top of Minseok's head. Minseok didn't care if their position was far too intimate for normal friends. At the moment, he couldn't care about anything else but the comfort it gives him to feel like he belonged inside Lu Han's arms.

 

That very moment lasted for about ten minutes, after that Minseok felt embarrassment quickly crawling under his skin. He realized soon enough how they managed to wrap themselves in each other. He is trapped inside Lu Han's arms with the Chinese boy's face buried in his hair. There's a hand still tracing soothing patterns on his back while his other arm is wrapped around him with a hand on his waist. One of Minseok's hand was still clutching at Lu Han's shirt while his other hand ended up behind the other's neck. His face was still buried in Lu Han's quite damp shirt. That wasn't the worst part yet. Somehow, in the middle of his crying fit, he had ended up sitting on Lu Han's lap. If ten minutes ago he didn't give a care about their position or anything at all, right now, ten minutes later, Minseok wanted the earth to open up and swallow him whole.

 

He wasn't even this bad when he unexpectedly cried on Yi Fan's shoulder. No. This is ten times worse than that. He doesn't know how he'll be able to untangle himself from Lu Han without making it more awkward than it already is.

 

Maybe Lu Han felt him tense up in the hold, but the soothing patterns on his back suddenly stopped, the grip around his waist also loosened and Minseok can feel the other move his face away from his hair. Minseok was afraid to look up and meet Lu Han's eyes. How is he supposed to explain this? How is he supposed to remove the awkwardness he had created? Sure, Lu Han might have comforted him but it doesn't mean that his friend would just tolerate this behavior. He's even sitting on his lap. Minseok really just wants to escape the situation and maybe lock himself up in his room for the rest of eternity.

 

"Are you okay, now?" Lu Han's voice was soft and full of concern. Even though his grip on Minseok had greatly loosened, he kept his hands on where they are and resumed tracing patterns on the other's back. 

 

Despite worrying over a lot of things just a few seconds ago, Minseok found himself relaxing once again in Lu Han's hold. He even felt the urge to bury his face back on Lu Han's chest, but he can never be so bold. His friend is being kind and considerate considering how broken he looked earlier. It's the only explanation he can come up with as to why he's being allowed to stay inside those warm arms. He fisted a handful of Lu Han's white shirt again. Once he did, he tensed up immediately. Without meeting the other's eyes, Minseok untangled himself from Lu Han's hold and quickly fixed his things.

 

"Minseok?" Lu Han asked. The confusion in his voice evident as he watch Minseok pack his things and is already standing up from his place.

 

"I'm sorry. I remembered something. I have to go now. See you tomorrow." came Minseok's hurried goodbye. He exited the door and he was out of Lu Han's apartment in no time.

 

~*~

 

There was a series of knocks on the door and it almost sounded frantic. The way Lu Han's face fell when Junmyeon was the one who answered the door was more than obvious.

 

"Yes, Lu?" Junmyeon asked in a kind tone. He already knows why the young lad is here, but he had promised Minseok.

 

"Junmyeon-hyung. Is Minseok there?" Lu Han asked, his eyes already darting around the apartment visible to him despite the older being in front of him.

 

"He's not yet home. He told me he'll be staying out tonight. Why? Can't contact him?" He felt really bad for lying to Lu Han but he can't sell his brother out until he finds out what's going on.

 

"He's not answering my messages and I can't reach him whenever I call. I'll just... I might see him tomorrow. Thanks, hyung." Lu Han gave a glance at the apartment one more time before turning heel and leaving the place. 

 

Junmyeon just sighed before softly closing the door and made unhurried steps towards Minseok's room.

 

"Minseok, you owe me an explanation." he said as he walked over to where Minseok had curled himself into a ball at the corner of his bed. "You've been avoiding him since yesterday. What happened to you guys when you went there?" Junmyeon brushed his little brother's hair. He couldn't see Minseok's face for the younger had it buried between his knees.

 

"Hyung... What did you feel when you first met Yi Fan-hyung?" a soft voice asked. Junmyeon doesn't know where Minseok is going with this question but he decided to answer it anyway if this will lead to his younger brother talking.

 

"For me, I wouldn't say it's outright love. I mean all I knew about him was his name. But when he held me back then, I felt complete, like I belonged there, inside his arms." While he was talking, Junmyeon had managed to uncurl Minseok from the ball he had created of himself. He can now see how depressed Minseok looked. It was even worse than that time he saw him after he had cried on Yi Fan.

 

"Is that possible even towards someone who isn't your soulmate?" Minseok asked again.

 

Junmyeon was honestly afraid to answer him. Minseok looked like he's on the edge, like any wrong answer would push him to his limit.

 

"Minnie. You need to tell me what's wrong." He pleaded.

 

"Hyung... I think... I think I'm in love with Lu Han." Minseok's shoulder started to shake, but Junmyeon held off from hugging him. He needed to hear the rest of what Minseok have to say. "I think I love him, hyung. But..." The first teardrop fell and it broke Junmyeon's heart to see Minseok break like that in front of him. "I saw... I saw the tips of the markings on Lu Han's chest. Those were black. He's already claimed." By now, Minseok was outright crying and Junmyeon couldn't hold himself back from embracing the younger. "I can't fall in love with him. He'll just leave me, too, because there's someone out there who is already destined to be his other half." Junmyeon didn't know what to say. He couldn't think of any comforting words that might help his brother. "Why? Why couldn't it be me? Why?"

 

~*~

 

When Minseok had finally fallen asleep, Junmyeon messaged Lu Han, asking the younger if he can meet with him for a while.

 

"Hyung. Minseok was home, right?" Lu Han asked right off. Junmyeon just nodded and offered no excuse in return.

 

"Is he avoiding me?" the younger asked again.

 

Junmyeon exhaled before meeting Lu Han's eyes. Lu Han looked miserable. His eyes were desperate and he doesn't look as handsome as usual. The older doesn't know if the main cause of it is Minseok's avoidance but he pity the young Chinese nonetheless.

 

"Minseok is... going through something right now." Junmyeon started. He wanted to help Minseok but he can't outright tell Lu Han to leave his brother alone. For all he knows, Lu Han considers Minseok as his close friend. It isn't the young Chinese's fault that Minseok fell in love with him even if he's already claimed. "Can you give him some space for now?"

 

Lu Han's face fell more than it already has at Junmyeon's words. It was obvious that the older is asking him to not bother Minseok for now. He's telling him to stay away from him. It was already hard not being with him for the entire day after Minseok's abrupt goodbye the previous night. Lu Han's hold tightened around the cup of coffee he ordered a few minutes ago. The drink still untouched as the heat slowly leaves the liquid.

 

He released a deep sigh before offering a hesitant nod back at Junmyeon. It will be hard but if it is what Minseok needs - space - then he have no other choice but to give it to him.

 

~*~

 

"Why?" Lu Han pounded the mirror again as his reflection stared back at him. "Why?!" He started hitting his forehead on the surface. He slowly opened his eyes and stared at his chest. The characters had lost the redness completely, leaving only deep black of that beautiful name.

 

김민석

 

"Why? Why are you black?! You're supposed to be red!" Lu Han slid himself from the surface of the mirror. He thought he had already found his other half when Minseok approached him that first time. But there was no reaction from him, even after he had introduced himself, going as far as even writing his name to show Minseok. But the other remained unresponsive to him. But seeing Minseok's pale blank chest was what convinced Lu Han that the other might not really be his other half. 

 

Can there be another 김민석 out there who can make him feel so complete? Make him feel like he needed nothing else? Make him feel like the search is over? A 김민석 waiting to be found and also searching for him right at this moment? A 김민석 that have his name (鹿晗) written on their chest? Can there really be another one whose very existence matter more than the Kim Minseok he have found?

 

"Why? Why do you have to be black? You're supposed to be red! Because Minseok's mark is not yet there! Why are you black?!"

 

He was a bit shocked to hear Junmyeon suggest that he give Minseok some space, because if his friend is going through something, he'll be more than glad to help out. But what made him say yes to the older's suggestion was the very same reason he wanted to help Minseok out. Friends. He calls him that, but in reality, he had never seen Minseok as just a friend. He tried to but the way Minseok felt in his arms, the way his own hands wrapped around the shorter male, he knew that he'll never be able to stop himself from treating Minseok as something more than that. And it's unfair. For both of them. They're not soulmates. Minseok will find his other half as soon as his own marks appear, and it won't be Lu Han's name because he's already claimed. And him, he'll find his other half too, someone who's likely looking for him right now. They'll just end up hurting each other if that time comes. And hurting Minseok, Lu Han wants none of that.

 

~*~

 

For the next few days, Minseok and Lu Han acted like they were strangers. They no longer sit next to each other or eat lunch together. They still practice soccer together but they mostly try to avoid being in each other's presence. 

 

Junmyeon told Minseok about his little chat with Lu Han that night and he appreciated his brother's worry. He thought that with the distance, he'll be able to sort his feelings out. Maybe make himself realize that he's just being delusional about this whole being in love situation he's in with Lu Han. But as the days come and go, Minseok's determination to make himself realize that he's not in love with Lu Han was crumbling. With each passing day, he can feel himself growing more desperate to talk again with the Chinese boy. To have him next to him. To chat about anything and everything. To know how his day was or just silently stay together.

 

Lu Han's appearance offer no help at all. He was growing paler every time Minseok will see him. His eyes have those unattractive bags underneath and he doesn't pay attention to how messy his hair is. The rare times that their gazes will meet, Minseok can see the desperation in Lu Han's eyes, almost begging him to stop whatever this is that's happening between them. But he never did approach Minseok or took the initiative to end it. They both just tried to live their lives without each other. And it was hell.

 

"Minnie. You should eat more." Junmyeon pleaded, shaking Minseok out of his thoughts and his vision refocused on the two worried older in front of him.

 

"Hyung. I'm not very hungry right now." he answered, his eyes scanning the cafeteria for a familiar bundle of brown hair.

 

"You barely ate breakfast and you haven't touched your lunch yet. Minseok, you've barely eat or sleep these days." His brother looked at him with concern but Minseok honestly didn't have the appetite these days. It was hard to fall asleep as well even though he feels tired, exhausted and heavy.

 

"Sorry, hyung. I'm going to class now." Minseok was already rising from his seat when Yi Fan handed him the bread that was sitting on his tray along with the rest of his lunch.

 

"At least take that with you. You might get hungry later." Yi Fan told him in all seriousness which left him no choice but to take it with him.

 

He didn't want to worry the couple anymore but it appears that he's failing miserably at it. He smiled at them in hope of lessening their worry even by a little, before turning heel to head to his next class. Minseok had to consciously stop himself from searching Lu Han's face amidst the stream of people coming and going, and being disappointed by not finding him in the cafeteria. He didn't see him back in class as well and he caught himself more than once looking for the Chinese boy.

 

Minseok guided himself out of the place, trying to keep his disappointment at not seeing Lu Han at bay. Maybe it was because his mind was wandering, or due to his lack of attention to his surroundings, or maybe it's the other person's fault, but as soon as he was out the doors he bumped onto something that feels like a someone.

 

He stumbled a bit backwards before a strong arm managed to stabilize him. It was a touch that feels so warm and familiar and suddenly he didn't need to see who it was because everything felt right again. The arm didn't stop at keeping him on his feet, it pulled him close, until he was tucked under the other's chin. Two arms encasing him in a warmth he missed so much together with comforting beats coming from the other's chest. Minseok couldn't stop himself from nestling his face closer to him, an attempt to erase what little space they have left between them. His own arms finding their way around the other and his hands reuniting on that warm strong back. Everything felt right, it felt complete, it felt like they belonged.

 

But as soon as it came, it was gone just as fast. The warmth pulled away, almost in a guilty way and Minseok couldn't chase it back for the same reason. He couldn't bring himself the courage to look at his face. He just stood there, staring at the floor until he heard the doors of the cafeteria swing open, then he was alone again in the hallway, feeling more empty than how he did before leaving the place behind him.

 

~*~

 

Minseok didn't see Lu Han for the rest of the day after that, which was weird since they have the same set of classes for that day. But the weirdest part was when Lu Han didn't turn up for soccer practice. The guy never missed practice before. It spurred an intense sense of worry in him. Something big could've happened. Sickness? Family problem? Or... an accident?

 

He was quick on his feet the moment practice ended. He was heading to Lu Han's apartment even before he realized what direction he was running to. He tried calling Lu Han's phone for the first time since they started avoiding each other but it was unattended. His heart was pounding in his ears and he had started to bite his lower lip. He didn't mean to bang at the door when he reached Lu Han's place but the uneasiness in his nerves made it impossible to knock calmly.

 

He couldn't hide his disappointment when instead of Lu Han, it was Yixing who answered the door. Yixing was in the same year as them and is called a dance prodigy in his department. He had been Lu Han's roommate since they are both Chinese which makes it easier for both of them. Yixing's face almost didn't change when he saw Minseok outside the door and almost out of breath. It wasn't the first Minseok is coming over to their place after all.

 

"Yixing! Where's Lu Han?" came his immediate question.

 

Yixing gave him a confused look before answering. "Lu-ge didn't tell you?"

 

The Chinese boy let the question hang in the air before Minseok's patience run out and he urged the other to continue what he was saying. "Tell me what?" He was surprised that he managed to keep the impatience out of his voice because Yixing has no fault in anything that is happening between him and Lu Han. Also, he had known long enough how absent minded the other can get during times when he's not on stage or practicing.

 

"Lu-ge only came to school today to tell the professors that he's leaving. He already left. He's going back to China." Yixing said in a tone that barely changed from his usual one, as if it's a fact that Minseok is supposed to have known. Well maybe he would've known about it if they weren't in this complicated situation right now.

 

The drumming in his ears got worse. The thought of never seeing Lu Han again, of never feeling his warmth again, of Lu Han leaving him. It was harder. Harder than letting Lu Han go to find his other half. He needed to find Lu Han. Be with him. For as long as he can possibly can. He'll be fine even if that time is limited to until Lu Han find his other half. He'll make do with the short time. Just not with Lu Han leaving like this. Not with Lu Han leaving him like this.

 

~*~

 

"Han. Should we move to the room now?" his mother asked. Instinctively, he looked at the wall clock. There's still five minutes before 11:00 p.m. but his mom looked worried enough plus he's not really doing anything. Lu Han gave his mom a small smile and was already rising from the sofa when insistent banging on their door came. At first, the three of them were hesitant to open it. It was almost midnight and none of them are expecting any visitor. His father rose from his seat and was already going near the door when Lu han heard the voice.

 

"Lu Han! Lu Han!"

 

His feet took him to the front door immediately and almost yanked the door open. He didn't get any chance to see the owner of the voice for he was tackled into a hug. The figure embracing him undoubtedly belongs to the only person that can make him feel so complete. Without any further ado, he returned the hug and just bathed in the other's presence.

 

"Han, dear. What's going on?" came his mother's soft voice. Lu Han didn't want to break the hug but he owe his parents some sort of explanation.

 

"Uhm, good evening." Lu Han's attention came back to the front door and he couldn't believe he just missed seeing Yi Fan standing just a few steps away from them. He looked out of breath but otherwise looked alright. "We apologize for the late intrusion but we're Lu Han's friends." he calmly explained. "We're just---"

 

Lu Han understood Yi Fan's sudden halt. The grip on his shoulder was deadly, he was wheezing and clutching at his chest. Little sounds of pain already escaping from his lips ad Lu Han didn't know what to do. But these reactions were very familiar. These reactions... it couldn't be!

 

"It's his 18th birthday tonight?!" he asked accusingly back at the older Chinese. He had maintained his grip to keep the other person from collapsing to the ground.

 

"It's not! It's not his birthday tonight!" Yi Fan yelled back, worry evident on his face as he tried to support the young Korean as well. "I'm terribly sorry, but can you lend us a room please." came the plead. It was hard to deny him the favor, plus Lu Han wouldn't have deny them that anyway.

 

Minseok was writhing in pain, he was clawing at his chest, tears streaming down his face and Lu Han's heart felt like it was dying. They managed to get him to the room that was intended for Lu Han's use that night. Minseok was whispering his name as he cried and Lu Han can't do anything but hold his hand. Bright red appeared on his chest as the others restrained his arms and legs to limit his movements. 

 

Lu Han was torn. He felt so useless just watching as Minseok screamed and thrashed on the bed. He couldn't keep his eyes away from Minseok's chest as the marks appeared in a slow pace. He feared for the name that is bound to show in a few hours time. The fear of another person's name on his beloved's chest. At the same time, he was anticipating it. The appearance of the name. A silent wish whispering in his head. A vision. That after this is all over he would see Minseok's chest with his name proudly engraved on that once pale blank chest.

 

"Lu Han! Lu Han!" Minseok was crying as he whispered his name. Lu Han can see the same fear and hope in the other's eyes. He wiped away the tears on that beautiful face, like the first time he saw him cry. Like the first time he couldn't hold himself back from embracing him and making him feel like he was there. He had caught Minseok whispering something about not wanting to be alone. In all honesty, Lu Han wanted to tell him that he wouldn't leave him alone. He wanted to tell him that he'll stay with him forever. But that will just be a cruel thing to say. Especially if he will need to leave someday.

 

Minseok lost consciousness a few times, until a brand new wave of pain will wake him up again into a screaming and crying mess. It was a hard stressful night but Lu Han never left his side, never let go of his hand and just stayed there next to Minseok's side.

 

The sun was starting to rise by the time Minseok finally quieted down and his body stopped pulsing in response to the pain. His chest was still a mess of red marks and they couldn't really understand it no matter how much they stared. His mother bandaged up Minseok's chest while Yi Fan and Lu Han changed his sweat soaked clothes.

 

Yi Fan thanked the Lu couple profusely for letting them stay the night in which they return with a thoughtful smile. Lu Han's parents left the three youngsters in the room as they came down to prepare breakfast.

 

Lu Han and Yi Fan stayed in silence for a few minutes before the quietness ended.

 

"Yi Fan-hyung. About what you said last night... What you said about Minseok's 18th birthday not being tonight? You mean he's already 18?" he asked in hesitance.

 

Yi Fan gave the sleeping figure a glance before nodding at Lu Han. 

 

"But he didn't have a mark..."

 

"Which is why Minseok had always been afraid of being alone, because his marks didn't appear. He was scared of not finding his other half. He was scared of falling in love with you, because you'll leave him, too, once you find your own soulmate."

 

"Minseok... loves me?"

 

"I was quite sure you got the message when Minseok came rushing to your house in the middle of the night. You shouldn't have left like that. Do you have any idea of the trouble we went through trying to get the earliest flight to Beijing?" Yi Fan had started complaining but it was still in that same friendly tone he used to address Lu Han before. "Why did you leave suddenly? Is it because Minseok was avoiding you?"

 

"I only came back because my mom was worried about me spending my birthday away from home. I was scheduled to take the flight back to Korea tomorrow."

 

"You mean you're not leaving Korea for good?"

 

"No. I just asked for a few days of leave from the university."

 

"Hahh! So this trip wasn't urgent at all. Whatever. We're here anyway. So when is your birthday?" Yi Fan asked.

 

"Come to think of it... Happy birthday to me!" Lu Han said in a schooled delighted voice.

 

The older only gave him a confused stare, his eyebrows meeting on the middle as he stared back at Lu Han. "But last night... I mean you were fine!"

 

"I already got my mark last March 26 for reasons I don't know. I don't understand why it came early but it did. Funny coincidence that my mark says Kim Minseok, but it's already in black so I know that he's not the Minseok I'm supposed to be looking for." Lu Han glanced back at Minseok. He looked so calm and peaceful, not like his painful expression less than an hour ago.

 

"March 26th?! You got yours on March 26th?!" Yi Fan asked in an almost yell.

 

"Uhm... yes. That's why my transfer got delayed for a week. I was supposed to come before April 1st, but then it got pushed to a few days later because I was still recovering from the markings." Lu Han explained, but the scowl on Yi Fan's face didn't disappear as his eyes dart back and forth to Lu Han and Minseok.

 

"What's wrong?"

 

"Nothing. I don't want to jinx it. Let's just wait until Minseok wakes up. I'll leave him to you, I just need to call Junmyeon before my boyfriend dies from worry." With that, Yi Fan made his way out of the door with his phone already on his ear. 

 

Lu Han stared back at Minseok. He let his hand brush over the dark brown strands of hair. This might be the last time he can watch Minseok like this again. When he wakes up, he might be craving for another person's presence, not him anymore. The soulmate mark do that to a person. He subtly wonders if Minseok having the same name as the one that says in his mark can be the reason for his attraction for him. He didn't have the luxury to think much about it because he had fallen for those beautiful eyes before he knows it. How cruel can this world get?

 

A  faint call from his mother's voice stirred him out from his little thought bubble. She was telling him to get down and eat breakfast and also to deliver food upstairs in case Minseok wakes up. He decided that he wouldn't be able to leave Minseok's side for long so he hurried downstairs and took enough food for two, opting to eat in the room as well.

 

He was putting the plates on a tray when a frantic hoarse voice came calling his name out.

 

"Lu Han! Lu Han! Lu Han!" 

 

The sound of something or someone falling on the floor followed and Lu Han darted upstairs, worried that Minseok might inflict more injury to himself moving around while he's still obviously weak.

 

He found Minseok struggling to rise up from the floor. His arms shaking with just his own weight as he tried to get up. Lu Han came to his side immediately to help him but Minseok had grabbed him and had wrapped his arms around the other.

 

"Don't leave me. Please." He was pressing his chest against Lu Han and the Chinese boy attempted to give them some space because he knows that those marks would still be stinging, but Minseok held him in place.

 

"Minseok---"

 

"It's you."

 

"What?"

 

"I know it's your name." Minseok pulled away and touched his still bandaged chest. "Lu Han. I've memorized how to write your name. I know. I know the say it's your name. Please, Lu Han." Minseok stared intently at him and grabbed his hands with his own shaking ones. "Please tell me it's my name on your chest. Please." The other placed one of his hand on Lu Han's chest and continued to plead with his eyes.

 

Lu Han didn't need to hear another plead from Minseok. It was enough. Minseok had suffered enough. They have denied each other's presence long enough. They have had enough.

 

He traced Minseok's face with his hand before it stops around the other's chin, then slowly pulled him close and angled his head to touch his own lips with those thin pink beauty. He had dreamed of kissing Minseok since they locked eyes, and now finally feeling it against his own, he was sure. They belonged.

 

~*~

 

"So you mean to say... that Lu Han got his mark on the night of Minseok's birthday and Minseok got his marks during Lu Han's birthday?" Junmyeon asked. His gaze fixed on the three other people on the table, although the two people in front of him were busy exchanging lazy smiles to each other which gives him only one attentive audience, his boyfriend.

 

"Yeah. That's basically it, Junmyeon." Yi Fan answered him.

 

The three made their way back to Korea as soon as Minseok was able to move on his own. The bandage was still firmly in place because the redness still haven't subsided so they decided to take it off at a later time. But not yet seeing the markings didn't stop Lu Han and Minseok from acting like they have found each other. Lu Han never left Minseok's side after Minseok woke up. They went straight to Minseok and Junmyeon's apartment where the older Kim had been waiting for them. And they were immediately subjected to an interrogation, Yi Fan at least.

 

"I wanted to be angry at them for ignoring me, but Minseok look so happy like this." Junmyeon said, declaring his temporary retreat about questioning them any further and just snuggled against Yi Fan's side.

 

"Were we that bad?" Yi Fan asked, also staring at Minseok and Lu Han and absently wrapping his arm around Junmyeon.

 

"I think we were. Mom had to chase you out a few times so we can both take a bath separately." Junmyeon said with a chuckle, reminiscing about their first few weeks together.

 

"Then I guess it's our turn to chase Lu Han out then, but maybe later."

 

"Yeah, let's do that later. We'll let the ants accumulate on them for now."

 

~*~

 

It was a week later when they can finally see the characters after most of the redness had worn off. Lu Han had volunteered to be the one to change Minseok's bandages. The fear and anticipation was still there. Even after Minseok had said that he was sure that it was Lu Han's name on his chest. He needed to see it for himself. And the way the characters were slowly starting to become clear from each time he will change the bandages was pure bliss. He couldn't remember a time when he had loved seeing his name so much until he saw it etched on Minseok's pale chest.

 

The redness was fading and quickly getting replaced by deep black marks, making the name stand out even more. He really wanted to trace them but he was holding himself back, afraid of inflicting any sort of pain on Minseok. He can remember the first time Minseok had touched the markings on his chest. Those small hands and slender fingers tracing the characters of his name with such fascination in his eyes. Lu Han loved the marks even more after that.

 

"It's my name, right?" Lu Han asked as his fingers hovered over the still slightly red characters. The 鹿晗 glaringly obvious by now and Minseok had to chuckle at Lu Han's disbelieving face.

 

"Yes. It's your name." Minseok answered.

 

"It is, isn't it."

 

Minseok couldn't count the number of times they have had this very same conversation over the past few days. Lu Han would ask him repeatedly and he would answer him earnestly every single time. Lu Han gave him a soft look of adoration before bringing his attention back at the marks.

 

"Why didn't you appear sooner? You made my Minseok worried, you know?" This was something Lu Han would regularly do as well, scold the innocent markings on Minseok's chest, and Minseok couldn't help but smile at him.

 

Lu Han stared at the marks again, consciously keeping his hands from touching them and asked again, "It's my name, right?"

 

Minseok let out another chuckle before answering, "Yes, it's your name."

 

---------------------------------------

P.S. Minseok's markings started appearing at 11:00 P.M. CST on April 19 because that would mean that it's 12:00 A.M. KST April 20 :) and if anyone is wondering Lu Han's markings appeared on March 26 12:00 A.M. CST. The markings followed the time zone of their partner's respective countries :)

 

If you reached all the way here then I'm glad that you were patient enough with all my lameness... (Excuse the grammar and spelling mistakes, I haven't beta this yet. If it bothers you so much, or if it won't be taking much of your time, do help me by sending a PM and i will correct them immediately.) Already did the beta :3

 

Akira: I can't believe I just wrote 11.6k words of this. Like I was honestly planning for this to be something short maybe 3k words at most so I'm honestly curious where the 8k+ words additional came from. Also, I said that I would be posting this the very same day I posted the description but that obviously didn't work since it's now a week later. Well, at least this wouldn't add on my list of unfinished fics.

 

Subscribes and Upvotes will be very much appreciated but please leave Comments TT^TT I live by reading those. Thank you so much TT^TT