We walked hand to the edge of the stage. The room was full as usual, but for once it was only surrounded by family and friends. I kept eyeing Tiffany out of the corner of my eye; she looked so gorgeous in her sparkly white dress. I was overwhelmed with the pure joy that was being shot through my veins by my heart with every beat.

I felt so lucky just to be here.

The man in the black robe we approached had his back to the audience, presumably so they could see every interaction between us. We were always in spotlight, after all. It seemed appropriate to be married on a stage.

“Before we get started,” He said, turning around to face them, “does anybody oppose this union?”

I stared out at the people, taking in their faces. Even my family was here, supportive, despite my worst fears. I smiled at them.

“We do.” I heard from the side. My entire body tensed up.

Approaching us wearing terrible smiles were Jessica and Yuri, hand in hand; the only two of our bridesmaids wearing black. I gaped at them as they stopped beside us.

“Why?” I asked in a small voice.

Yuri laughed, looking down upon me. She seemed taller than normal. Both her and Jessica’s makeup was intense, they almost didn’t look themselves. They looked absolutely horrible, but heartbreakingly beautiful at the same time.

“Isn’t it obvious?” She asked me, sneering. “I’m in love with Tiffany.”

I choked.

Jessica smiled up adoringly at Yuri. “YulTi is pretty popular…” She let her eyes fall back to me lazily and she bit her lip, “and so is TaeSic.”

“W-..What?!” I asked, glancing between the pair of them, “Have you lost your minds?”

“You need to learn how to share, Unnie.” Yuri said unsympathetically. She looked at me like I had been terribly rude.

I looked back into the crowd to see my parents seemingly very confused.

“I’m not sharing! How could you do this to me on my wedding day?” My voice was rising.

She held a hand up to silence me.

“You’ll learn soon enough.” She held her hand out to Tiffany.

I watched in horror as Tiffany went to her.

“T-Tipani?” I practically begged, my voice breaking.

She took Yuri’s hand, and with all the lightness and happiness in her eyes, rolled onto her toes to kiss her. There was nothing sweet about this kiss, it was hungry and ual and it was right in front of my parents. I could have died.

“N- No..” I whimpered.

Jessica was approaching me now.

“Shhhh...” She put a finger on my lips in an effort to sooth me, using her other hand on my shoulder to back me off stage. I was shocked to find we were already in a bedroom and she was pushing me onto my back.

“I’ll take care of you, Taeyeonie...” She whispered, staring with carnal desire that I found frightening. 

“No... I don’t want-.. Please. Fany-ah!” I called out

“She can’t hear you...” Jessica said in mock sadness and she tilted her head to nibble on my ear.

“D-Don’t! Fany-ah! FANY-AH!”

…

Something hit me hard in the face and my eyes opened against darkness. I moved the pillow out of the way to find Sunny standing there in her robe glaring at me. Her hair was an abstract piece of art on top of her head. I was stunned to find myself in the living room on the couch with a laptop on my lap.

“Are you trying to wake up South Korea?” She asked between her teeth.

I was brought up short. Was I sleeping? Was I talking? I looked about completely confused and went to rub my eyes only to find that they were wet.

“Bad dream?” She asked, sitting next to my feet.

“I... I guess so.” I said, dazed. 

The pillow she threw at me knocked the laptop out of its sleep mode and I could see I was still logged into Soshified forums, under an alias of course, looking at the pairing forums. It all came back to me now, I was searching these forums because Strong Heart aired last night and I was looking for immediate reactions which were better than I could have hoped for. Not only were the locksmiths thrilled about all the Taeny moments and spreading it like wildfire, they were angry at SM for their encroaching rules against us.

I did get sidetracked, though. Obviously, my subconscious had taken the posts of the other pairings I read a bit more seriously than I had originally thought.

I turned the laptop off and set it on the table, sitting up and clutching my head in my hands.

That dream was so real…

Sunny rubbed my back. “It was only a dream.”

I nodded and got up, going to my room to finish packing. I woke the others after getting dressed. We had to be at the airport in two hours to go to Singapore for the MAMA awards, something our younger members were rather nervous about seeing as we’ve only come back to Korea for a month know. We were up for some pretty high honors but I didn’t think we’d win. The competition was pretty stiff this year.

When I was ready, I left my bags downstairs in the lobby and went to check on the other girls to make sure they were coming along. Well, it was a noble excuse anyway. I found their door already open and Hyoyeon was carrying her luggage through the kitchen. She stuck her tongue out at me and I grinned. I checked on Yuri first who looked like she was almost ready. Seohyun was already gone.

I followed the music, back to Tiffany’s room and found her packing in a very different way. She was singing along to our song ‘My J’ while she was folding and stuffing her suitcase. It was obvious that she was in a good mood. I watched her through the crack in her door.

“…Tumyeong hago saljjak hwan hage…” She danced around daintily.

I moved slowly trying to pull out my cell phone out of my pocket to record this.

“Saranghae yo My Tae! My Tae, my Tae, saranghae yo nawa-“ She sang into the mirror.

I froze when I heard her revised lyrics. My phone dropped to the ground and she turned to see me there. We had an extended stare down of one another and for the first time she didn’t look pleased to see me.

I smiled innocently.

“How long were you there..?” She asked.

I nodded thoughtfully, “Long enough.”

“You could have told me.” She said, sounding upset and packing in a much more professional manner now.

“What? And stop that from happening? Not in a million years.” I said laughing.

She looked at me coldly and said nothing.

“Hey...” I said, crossing her room and putting a hand on her shoulder. “Don’t be mad at me. That was adorable.” I tried to console her. Tiffany didn’t like getting embarrassed.

She pouted at me through the mirror and I crossed my eyes to try and make her smile but she ignored me. I tried to make my most intense puppy dog face which actually probably made me look like a fish and I saw the corner of twitch.

She turned around and poked me in the stomach.

“Am I forgiven?” I smirked.

“I guess.” She said unconvincingly, but she smiled.

“Are you almost ready?” I asked.

“Just about…” She said, putting a few more things into her suit case.

“You know I had the strangest dream last night.” I said, chuckling.

“Tell me about it.” She zipped up her bag and picked it up off the bed.

“I’ll tell you on the plane.” I laughed again, walking with her into the lobby.

She didn’t think it was as funny as I now did. She was more concerned with how much I was immersing myself into the media and fan forums, saying I was going to lose my head if I kept letting it get to me. We could agree to disagree. After fully waking up and replaying the fuzzy details back to myself, the whole dream seemed rather absurd.

The morning of the awards came and I wasn’t particularly excited to sit down for hair and makeup for three hours. I put my headphones in and closed my eyes thinking about the great performances I’d get to watch, and performing our own remix. I always enjoyed these award shows, it was less of just getting there performing and leaving and more about being a part of the musical community.

I was taken back when I saw the results of three hours of hair and makeup. My hair was drawn up my banks were swept perfectly across my face. There wasn’t a single speck or imperfection to be seen. I almost looked like I was being photoshopped in real time. It felt unnatural but… in a way I felt like a princess.

After putting the dress on the fairytale was complete. It was lavender and short. It showed more of than I was used to, but I admit it fit me and the concept very well. One by one I started seeing the others emerge completely decked out. It was a stark contrast from past award shows that we attended all matching one another. Every girl was showing off her best aspect tonight. It was astounding. Tiffany looked absolutely breathtaking. Her shiny dress would be a source of distraction tonight.

The night was long, we had already performed and they were starting to get to the bigger awards. I was seated between Tiffany and Seohyun behind the others and so far had been on my best behavior. There was a camera man making the rounds around our area so when I could, I’d hold Tiffany’s hand low so it wouldn’t be caught on TV.

The MAMA awards were way beyond Korean broadcasting, it was a worldwide event. I glanced over to Yongjun who was sitting off to the right of us.

Tiffany hit my knee before some applause started. Two presenters were coming to the stage now.

“Best female group.” She said excitedly.

“Fany-ah, don’t get your hopes up…” I warned, watching the nominees being played on the screen in front of us.

“You don’t think we’ll win?” She turned to me.

“Not really.” I said, staring up at 2ne1’s video.

She poked my nose. “Have a little more faith, Taetae.” She said.

I smirked, peering over at Seohyun who appeared to be holding her breath.

“…and the 2011 MAMA Best Female artist goes to…” The male presenter said.

I glanced up at him, no longer breathing either.

It was suddenly very loud and I hadn’t heard what he said. Everyone rose around me and I looked confused. Tiffany pulled me up and started dancing, so I followed her lead.

“We won!” She said.

“What? Are you sure?” I gaped at her, but sure enough after looking around I saw our video being displayed now.

Wow.

I followed them up with a stupid grin on my face and stood up there as they talked. I couldn’t even grasp how large this place was with the house lights on. It was my turn and I mentioned the Sones mechanically. I still haven’t wrapped my head around the fact that we won, but I could feel Tiffany’s hands on my shoulders. My life support.

We returned to our seats and it still hadn’t really sunk in for me. Tiffany handed me the award and I looked at her dumbfounded.

“Told you.” She said.

I beamed.

Someone came to lean beside us.

“No more stunts.” Yongjun said in my ear.

“What?” I said, looking up at him puzzled. “I didn’t even do anything!”

He shook his head. “I saw it. I saw you dancing. I saw her holding you on stage.” He pointed his finger in Tiffany’s face.

The straw the broke the camels’ back.

I furiously knocked his hand out of the way.

“Seriously? I can’t even touch her?” Tiffany asked, with raised eyebrows.

I shook my head, language failed me. My blood was boiling.

I really wasn’t even trying to do anything this time.

“Yongjun. This is over. You don’t even want to know what I’m capable of.” I said to him, waving him off.

“Are you threatening me?” He asked.

“Even if I have to do it myself I’m moving the girls back in when we get back to Korea. We’re done playing games.” I turned to glare at him.

“If I have to… I’ll get the President involved.” He said, looking wary.

Unbelievable. 

“Go ahead. Call him.” I said, just trying to get rid of him. “It won’t stop me.”

The next presenters were on stage now, and Yongjun finally returned to his seat. I was so mad; Tiffany was trying so hard to calm me down. Even Seohyun seemed upset.

“What is this?” I said, pointing up to the stage trying to distract myself.

“Artist of the year.” Tiffany said.

I sighed looking up at 2ne1’s video again.

Tiffany took my hand and leaned her head in close to mine.

“Are you really going to move us in?” She whispered.

“Yes.” I said defiantly, glaring back at Yongjun.

I felt Tiffany squeeze my hand and I sighed, staring back up at the presenters blankly. I knew I’d do it, too. How could anybody be so disrespectful to Tiffany? After four years with this guy he’s showing his true colors. This wasn’t over, this only just the beginning. I’d make him pay for this, even if I had to carry every piece of furniture, lamp, plushy up fifty flights of stairs…

“So Nyuh Shi Dae!” The presenters yelled together.

My mouth dropped open. Artist of the year? Really?

Nobody was so quick to shoot out of their seats this time. We looked at each other wondering if there had been a mistake before we slowly got to our feet. I stayed behind while the others started making their way onto the stage. This was one setting in quicker than the other one. I was elated, adrenaline was running through my veins, and I had two words for Yongjun before I got on stage.

I patted him on the shoulder and knelt down to whisper in his ear slowly.

“Watch... this…”

I wasn’t even sure what I was going to do and I don’t know what came over me. Suddenly, I was running to catch up and then… I was just running to run.

I cleared the stairs and saw my girlfriend in front of me; in her sparkly white dress… the stage was ours… I took her hand as I blew past the others and she ran right along with me. I made a triumphantly dorky face at a camera we passed along the way.

“Oh my god!” I heard her say in English beside me over the screaming crowd.

It was wide open in front of us and we made it ours, running as fast as we could in our heels. She was pulling me along and I felt weightless. The girls were at our heels now running as well.

I tried to stand as close to Tiffany as I could during the acceptance speech, so close that I caught a blast of her perfume. I felt dizzy staring at everyone with the houselights on. The sea of people seemed to go on forever, but at that moment every doubt about how we’d be received disappeared. 

SNSD is back. 

Taeny never left.

I grinned and gave a thumbs-up to the camera.

-----------------------------------------

Little was said on the ride back to the dorms from the airport.  Yongjun followed us into the lobby to tell us to use tomorrow as a day of rest and probably just to make sure we went to separate dorms. I wasn’t sure if he took my threat seriously and I hadn’t spared him a single glance since the incident at the awards, much less any words.

I saw him walking back out to the parking lot as the door closed on my roommates and me.

The elevator only just started rising when I slammed on the emergency break. The whole compartment shook violently.

“Yah! What the heck?!” Jessica yelled, bumping into me to keep from falling over.

“We need to go back down.” I said thoughtfully as I glanced over the different buttons on the control panel.

“Why?” Sooyoung asked, as Sunny stepped forward to take control of the elevator. We were descending again.

“I just need to talk to everyone.” I said.

I could see Sooyoung and Yoona look at each other oddly at my statement before the doors opened again. I inspected the lobby slowly to make sure he had left before I led the girls to the other dorm.

I found their door unlocked, so I didn’t bother knocking.

“Yah! Come here!” I shouted and went directly to their living room. Sica and the others from my dorm sat on the couch looking curious as the others came out slowly to join them.

I paced in front of the couch trying to find the right words. I glanced up to see Tiffany leaning against the wall staring at me inquisitively. I smiled at her.

“What is it, Unnie?” Yuri asked for everyone else.

Addressing them in a serious matter like this as a leader still made me nervous. Even in my position I never had to push any authority on them. We worked as a group; everyone did their parts without having to be told. We more or less worked like a well oiled machine after four years. Leader was just another way of letting people know I was the oldest.

“I’ve made a decision I want to run by you guys…” I said.

“Oh great, are you going to try and step down as leader again?” Yuri asked. This got a few smiles.

“No, I’m stepping up actually.” I answered seriously. “I just want your opinions first.”

I scratched my head awkwardly and cleared my throat. They were just staring at me intently.

“So... who thinks SNSD should be living together?” I asked.

Unanimous hands in the air.

I nodded. “Right, well we have a day off tomorrow so… anybody that wants to move back upstairs have your stuff packed by tomorrow morning. I’ll help you take it up.”

Sunny and Tiffany smiled at one another, the others looked shocked.

“What about Yongjun Oppa?” Seohyun asked.

“That’s why I want you guys to take this decision seriously.” I folded my hands. “This is my decision, not his. He doesn’t know about this.”

It was silent and I avoided their eyes, opting to look at Tiffany. She nodded at me encouragingly.

“Put some thought into it.” I said, taking a few steps towards the door. “I’ll be by in the morning and uhh... I won’t hold your decisions against you. If anything happens, if we get into trouble, I’ll take full responsibility.”
Someone grabbed my elbow.

“But what happens to you then?” Seohyun said, standing up.

“I... don’t know. I’m ready to find out though. I know it’s the right thing to do. I’m the reason this happened.” I said, reaching up to pat Seohyun on the shoulder. “Don’t worry so much. I’ll see you guys tomorrow morning.”

I left with my hands in my pockets hoping, praying, I was doing the right thing. Even if this was something that could potentially get me thrown from the group, and it surprised me immensely how little I was concerned about that, it was still the right thing to do for the others. We need the time to bond with one another.

My girls come first.

“Kim Taeyeon!” I heard Sunny.

I turned to find my roommates leaving the other dorm now and coming to meet me at the elevator.

“You are absolutely brilliant,” Sunny beamed, “but you’re kind of stupid, Taeyeon.”

I blinked.

“Did you really think we wouldn’t help you move them?” She asked, pinching my ear.

“Aish!” I winced.

“Yeah, seriously.” Sooyoung smirked.

“It’s not your place-“ I started.

“Eeeesh, shut up!” Sunny said, “We’re helping, deal with it.”

“Alright, alright.” I muttered.

My vibrated and I pulled out my cell phone as we got into the elevator.

One message from Tiffany.

“Tae~ Can I stay with you tonight after I finish packing? ~Fany”

My eyes lit up.

“You don’t have to ask.” I typed back quickly.

Jessica and Sooyoung started giggling behind me in unison.