18: Deceit

Description

Twelve men wake up in a building with no memory of their past. There is a countdown in the living room, a mysterious speaker explains the rules, and then they start disappearing.

 

Title: 18: Deceit

Genre: Angst, mystery/psychological/idk

Pairings: Lay/Everyone, xiuhan, taohun, chinaline, idk all the ships in some way i guess

Length: Long

Warnings: swearing, violence, implied abuse, disassociation, character death

 

 

Foreword

Prologue


He runs down the corridor, lush carpet thick and soft under his feet, the fragile decorations trembling under his steps.

“Xing’er, be careful!” his mother calls out. “Stop running so quickly and don’t hurt yourself!”

He skids to a halt at the end of the corridor and turns around, pouting. “I’m not gonna hurt myself. I’m a man,” he declares.

His mother chuckles and his father says, “Yes, our Yixing is all grown up now!” as they walk to join their son. “So you must protect Xian’er also.”

The girl pokes her head out from behind her mother, secretly making a face. The boy stifles laughter and nods gravely. “Of course, Father.”

“Ah, I almost forgot,” the man says. The boy watches curiously as he pulls something out from his pocket, placing it in the boy’s palm. “You can’t protect your sister with only your fists. This is for you, in the future.”

The boy peers at the shiny chrome sitting heavily in his hand. “Wow,” he breathes.

His father carefully positions the boy’s fingers into the right holding position and guides his arm up, aiming at the portrait hanging on the wall in front of them. “Guns are very dangerous weapons,” he tells his son, “but if you know how to use it well, it can become your best friend.”

“Yes, Father,” the boy replies, still gazing at his new possession in awe.

The father lets go and places some pellets in the boy’s other hand. “You’ll need more, but keep these for now.”

“Thank you, Father!” the boy cries happily, closing his fingers tightly around the bullets.

“Not fair! Xian’er wants cool things too!” the girl protests from aside.

Their father turns and ruffles her hair fondly. “You’re too young. Maybe next year, and maybe your brother can teach you how.”

Xian’er still pouts, but the boy says, “Father, teach me how now! Please?”

“So impatient,” the man teases.

He takes the gun and places one bullet inside. “You must aim carefully,” he says , as he brings his arm up. “You should succeed every time. Do not waste your time, energy, nor resources, else your enemy will take them from you.”

The boy watches intensely as his father’s finger moves.

 

A vase suddenly shatters.

The gun goes off, the family portrait clattering to the floor.

 

Xian’er’s scream joins poundings and yells from outside the door.

“The children!” the mother cries.

 

The chrome, burning hot, is shoved into the boy’s hands. “Fa-”

Someone takes his arm and drags him down the hall. His tries to ask questions – what is happening? where are you taking me? – but it is as if he has been gagged.

He is ushered into a dark room – “Hide!” – and left alone. Xian’ers cries and his mother’s frantic voice melts into the angry shouts, all sound muffled in his ears. There are shuffling footsteps and creaking wood and shattering china and so many angry people.

He crawls under the bed and curls into a ball. He can’t seem to breathe and the gun pokes at him awkwardly from inside his pocket. He realizes he is still clutching the bullets and he carefully places them into a satchel.

 

Footsteps outside the door.

He stops breathing and squeezes his eyes shut.

“Kill them all!”

The command floats above the angry noise, piercing straight into him.

He stops breathing, but his breathing is still too loud and he is sure they can hear his pounding heart.

 

The footsteps fade and he slowly opens his eyes. Moonlight streams in from the window and he slowly creeps over. Maybe, just maybe . . .

Trembling, he peeks out the window.

Below him is a mass of people, like ants, surrounding his father, his mother and his sister. The torches paint them in fiery anger and the animosity they exude curls around the boy’s neck, choking him.

“Where is the boy?” someone screams.

He gasps sharply and throws himself back into the shadows.

The house seems to shake as the mass clamors back in. The boy trembles with fear and adrenaline.

He swallows heavily and takes a deep breath.

He opens the window and jumps.

 

He runs.

 


 

The prologue was a dream i had because i have really weird dreams. i think my dream was actually more detailed than what i wrote? idk... 

this was an attempt at nanowrimo so my writing style kind of changed to reach the word count goal. i'm usually really concise but i forced myself to become more long-winded because that's the only way i can write 50k okay?... >u<

 

the title came after reading Pale Fire by Vladmir Nabokov because i realized that 18 in french sounds like deceit. And this was totally inspired by my most favorite fic ever, 48 hours

fefedove
[18: Deceit] The fic is COMPLETE!

Comments

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Ione_Wisteria
#1
Chapter 19: I came here for Taohun tbh. Yes, I am hopeless 'cause they're still my OTP and it's almost the last quarter of 2021 already hahaha. Anyway, this fic somehow reminded me of that novel < The Five People You Meet in Heaven > by Mitch Albom mainly because of the closure and the connectedness plot. I'm planning to read the inspirations for this fic soon as this genuinely made me want to read more of this genre.
The details were foggy at first but it got gradually clearer towards the end. It was rather sad and I can feel the regret of the characters. It didn't help that I was listening to ZTAO's oh-so heartfelt songs such as Break Up, 19, Once Beautiful, One Heart, and The Best of Us. It started because of The Road (as suggested in one of the chapters). This is my first time actually commenting on a fic and I don't know what to say. I just want to express that this fic made me feel something heavy and unexplainable. And I don't know if I want to dwell on it or not. It feels unpleasant but it feels human. It feels right idk. I'm attached to this fic in an unexplainable sense and I don't make sense.
xKalias #2
Chapter 18: After so long, I finally came back to this site to read this story and boy, this was a rollercoaster. I truly enjoyed every last bit and I loved the different dynamics dealing with psychology and towards the end, philosophy. I applaud you for this great work. Hope to read more !!
xiu_mine
#3
Chapter 19: I finally got to read this and made it till the end! What a ride it was... I'm not usually one who reads psycho thrillers though it appeals to me alot but it tires me so much doing the active thinking while reading, so I only get to do read some once in a while.

Your fic turned out to be alright, a little vague in some parts that I end up getting confused so I appreciate the explanation at the end as it clears a lot of things.
_jongdaenosaur
#4
Chapter 19: Awww it's over. I was always a little confused with the whole journey until chapter 17 bc i couldn't pinpoint things and now i'm sad it's over. I knew this going to end with everyone's death but what i didn't expect was they were already dead to begin with like lol

My bae was such a er here like i don't blame him for turning out like that with what happened with his family. But iuhan genuinely cared abt him and would have done everything for him and he just had to throw all that away and ed up bc he was too emo

This is one of my faves actuallyyy. I like these sort of stuff bc i have to rly guess what's gonna happen and it's thrilling. You did a fine job fleshing out this complicated plot whooooooooooooo.

and I STILL CANT BELIEVE YOU HAD ME BELIEVING SUHO WAS LAME FOR 90% OF THE FIC YOU NASTY
_jongdaenosaur
#5
Chapter 15: NO NOT UMIN DONT TAKE UMIN NEVER KILL UMIN NOOOOO~

Okay what the just happened i am still grieving over sehun and you just gotta take xiumin away too. Also present-tense lay is nasty wow is that his real self?
DarcieMouse
#6
Chapter 19: A very clever story that I couldn't put down and rather sad that it's over already.
vpurple #7
Chapter 18: this was sooo good omg!!! i'm usually not into fics like this but i loved the mystery and thriller, it was so gripping & such an interesting read, thanks for writing!!