008

Beautifully Imperfect

008

 

____________________

 

 

 

“Will you tell me what is the meaning of this?”

 

Mrs. Kang asks quietly as she leans back to the couch, eyes fixated on the two young girls sitting across her, few inches apart from each other. Seulgi glances over at Irene who’s tilting her head down, her long hair is covering the side of her face that Seulgi can’t see what expression the other girl is making right now.

 

Seulgi glances back to her mother, seeing the unreadable expression on her face. She swallows the knot in , clenching and unclenching her hands nervously, preparing herself from anything she’s going to receive after this.

 

It’s all or nothing.

 

“Mom, I—“

 

“I’m sorry.”

 

Irene blurts out suddenly, cutting Seulgi’s forming speech and makes the girl whips her head to her.

 

“Why are you sorry, Irene?” Mrs. Kang asks quietly, staring at Irene.

 

“I’m sorry for dragging your daughter into this—“

 

“Irene!” Seulgi calls out in protest, staring at Irene in disbelief.

 

“Seulgi, silence, she is speaking.” Mrs. Kang says sharply, turning her eyes to her daughter.

 

Seulgi glances at the mother and opens in protest, but decides to stay quiet after seeing her mother’s stern expression.

 

“Irene, continue please.” Mrs. Kang hums quietly, turning her eyes back to Irene.

 

Irene closes her eyes and takes a deep breath before staring back into Mrs. Kang’s eyes.

 

“I like girls, Ma’am. I always have, and I happened to like Seulgi.” Irene glances over at Seulgi and gives her a soft smile before continuing. “Seulgi has no idea about anything, I was the one who dragged her into this, I lied to her, I tricked her into believing that liking girls would be so much better, I tricked her into dating me because I like her.”

 

Seulgi widens her eyes in disbelief because what the hell is Irene saying?  

 

“Mom, it’s—“

 

“Seulgi, you’ll get your turn to talk.” Mrs. Kang cuts off before turning back to Irene.

 

“So, Irene.” She ucrosses her legs and leans forward. “You’re saying that you convinced Seulgi into dating you by lying and tricking her?”

 

Irene bites her lower lip and nods her head. “I did.”

 

“Okay, then.” Mrs. Kang nods in understanding and leans back to the couch, turning her head to Seulgi. “And what do you have to say about this, Seulgi?”

 

“It’s not true, mom.” Seulgi says quickly, her chest heaving up and down at the emotion she’s been holding. “Irene likes girls, but she never lied or tricked me for it.”

 

“So what did she do to you?” Mrs. Kang raises her brows slightly.

 

Seulgi glances over at Irene, staring at each other’s eyes before she turns back to her mother.

 

“She made me fall in love with her.”

 

Irene’s jaw drops slightly at the answer and the room falls quiet. Mrs. Kang’s gaze softens slightly as she stares at her daughter, wondering where was the shy little girl she used to know. She doesn’t realize that her daughter has grown up so fast and so much.

 

“How?” She asks softly, voice coming out like a whisper.

 

“By being herself.” Seulgi replies simply.

 

“I see…” Mrs. Kang hums quietly, turning her eyes to Irene. “And Irene, how did you fall in love with Seulgi?”

 

Irene gapes and blinks for a moment before she answers.

 

“I just—I just fell, I didn’t even realize…” Irene answers quietly, eyes darting around the room as if she’s searching for more convincing answer that her brain can’t find.

 

Mrs. Kang stares between the two girls before sighing and looks up to the ceiling.

 

“Young love, how can you be so sure?” She asks softly as if speaking to herself. “You haven’t even graduate high school, sweethearts. How can you be so sure that this is the right thing? How can you be sure that everything will be going well?”

 

The room falls silent again at the questions.

 

That’s right, they’re still young, far too young to decide for themselves, too young to know what’s good and bad for them, too young to judge the future and judge the world. Seulgi knows that there would be a bigger world waiting for her after this, there would be so many doors and so many roads opened for her ahead, there would be a lot of new faces, new places, new things that would welcome her once she steps out of her current world.

 

She glances over at Irene to see the latter dropping her gaze to the ground. Irene must be thinking about the same thing as her too. Sure, she likes girls, but Seulgi knows there were so many girls who are better than her, who are prettier, smarter, kinder, and probably more suitable for Irene. Her heart aches a bit thinking about it, but Seulgi is not a naïve girl.

 

Even though her future is blurry and she has no idea what’s ahead, she still wishes that Irene always be a part of her new world that she’s going to discover in the future, she still wishes that Irene would always be by her side and they would hold hands together as they step through one of the opened doors, together.

 

“We don’t know what future have for us, nobody knows.”

 

Irene suddenly speaks, making Seulgi perks her head up in surprise and blinks at her. Mrs. Kang seems to be surprised too, she slowly leans forward and keeps her eyes on Irene as the girl speaks.

 

“Why bother with something that we don’t know? With something that’s out of our control?” Irene curls her lips into a small smile. “The only thing we can control is right now, and that’s why I decide to hold on, to live the moment. It’s true that I have no idea what would happen in the future and what would happen to us, but I prefer to live the moment when I still have the chance right in front of my eyes.”

 

Irene glances over at Seulgi for a moment before she continues with her speech.

 

“I’d rather regret something that I’ve done than something that I didn’t do. Though I’m sure that I won’t regret anything when it comes to Seulgi.” She smiles briefly before turning her eyes back to Mrs. Kang.

 

“I understand if you’ve come to dislike me, I’ve known about the risk ever since I started to make my move on Seulgi. But I’d be really happy if you don’t misunderstand my sincere feelings because I really, really like her.”

 

Seulgi can hear how Irene’s voice gets slightly shaky at the end of the words, but there are no tears in her eyes. Those eyes are still bright and strong, staring at her mother with a serious look on her face. Seulgi can feel her heart goes rampage inside her chest. How she wishes to throw her arms around Irene and pulls her into a tight hug and never let her go.

 

“Mom—“

 

“Seulgi, take Irene home.” Mrs. Kang says as she stands up from her couch, earning a confused look from Seulgi and Irene.

 

“Mom?” Seulgi frowns and stands up from the couch.

 

“Take Irene home and then come back here.” Mrs. Kang says softly. “Your father’s coming home tonight.”

 

Seulgi feels her heart stops for a millisecond, she can feel her body turns cold out of sudden. Her father, Seulgi has never been especially close with him, maybe in the past, but it’s not something she can remember clearly. It was too long ago.

 

Too long since the last time she had a proper talk with her father. Too long since the last time she laughed together with him. Too long since the last time she held her father’s hand.

 

Seulgi doesn’t know what her father would think about this. She doesn’t know what would her father do to her relationship with Irene.

 

“You have to talk about this to your father too, Seulgi.” Mrs. Kang smiles wryly before leaving the living room and goes upstairs.

 

“Mom—“

 

Seulgi is about to rush over to her mother when a hand on her wrist stops her movement. She turns her head to look at Irene who’s giving her a reassuring smile.

 

“Your mother needs time.” She says softly.

 

“But, Irene… I don’t want us to—“

 

Her words cut off immediately when Irene places a finger against her lips, silencing her.

 

“Your family comes first, it always has, Seulgi.” Irene smiles bitterly. “They’re the one who take care of all this time, the home of your heart.”

 

Seulgi can see it in Irene’s eyes, she can see how desperately Irene wants to abandon everything and just be with Seulgi as if the world only revolves around them. But Irene knows that Seulgi’s world isn’t just about her, there are her family, her friends and her dreams, and no matter how badly Irene wants to be together with Seulgi, she doesn’t want to destroy what Seulgi has right now.

 

Seulgi in a deep breath and squeezes onto Irene’s hand, giving her a reassuring look.

 

“We’ll be okay. I will not leave you, Irene.”

 

Irene blinks at her before nodding her head with a smile, her eyes glistening slightly.

 

“Let’s go home, then.”

 

 

____________________

 

 

 

Seulgi taps her feet nervously against the tile of her living room as she waits for her father to put all his suitcases upstairs. He has been in his room for almost half an hour, yet there isn’t any sign on him coming out anytime soon. Seulgi wonders if her mother is trying to calm her father after the overwhelming news, but she doesn’t hear any yell or loud sound coming from upstairs, so she tries to convince herself that everything is fine.

 

Hopefully.

 

Seulgi jolts slightly from her seat when the door opens. She whips her head to the stairs and waits in anticipation as the footsteps resounds in the house. She bites her lower lip as Mr. Kang comes into view, just in his casual t-shirt and sweatpants. Seulgi briefly wonders when was the last time she saw her father not wearing formal clothes or suits.

 

“Come on.” Mr. Kang gestures at her daughter, earning a confused look from the girl.

 

“What?” Seulgi blinks rapidly.

 

“Let’s go to the car.” Mr. Kang says again, showing the car keys in his hand.

 

“Huh? O-Okay…” Seulgi blinks again but nods her head anyway and follows her father to the car despite being utterly confused.

 

The ride is filled with silence with Seulgi glancing over between her father and the window once in a while. She wonders if her mother told her father about Irene, because if she did, the way her father reacts is really weird. Did he accept it or not? Is he angry? What is he planning to do?

 

Could it be her father is planning to abandon her somewhere on a deserted area?

 

No, no matter how angry her father is, he would never do that. It has been long time ago, but Seulgi can still remember how gentle and loving her father was when she’s a little girl. She remembers how her father bought her ice cream when they’re taking a walk in the park, she remembers how her father bought her a cooking toy set for her birthday, she remembers the times before she grew up and distant from her busy parents.

 

“Seulgi?”

 

The girl blinks rapidly, pulling herself out of her thought before turning her head to her father.

 

“Yes?” She purses her lips.

 

“Would you like to—“ he pauses in hesitation before continues, “take a seat over there?”

 

Seulgi blinks again and tilts her head in confusion. She then turns her head to the window and notices that her father has parked the car on the park of Han River, the place where they used to come on her father’s day off when she’s a kid. How nostalgic.

 

Seulgi turns her head back to her father and nods with a smile. “Sure.”

 

They end up sitting on one of the benches in the park, facing the river that reflects the city light like a giant mirror. She doesn’t think that it will look this pretty at night too, she thought that the nice view of Han River that she often saw on TV was simply edited to attract tourist.

 

“Seulgi.”

 

She takes a breath and turns her head to the man beside her.

 

“Yes?”

 

The man takes a deep breath and sighs softly, eyes still focused on the view in front of them.

 

“I’ve always been a…hardworking person? Workaholic? Is that how you call it?” The man squints his eyes as he speaks before shaking his head. “Nevermind about it, but I’ve always been a type of person who drowns myself in work.”

 

Seulgi stares at her father quietly as she listens attentively, wondering where this conversation is going.

 

“Then I fell in love with your mother, and I found out that work is not everything… That there’s something better than drowning myself in work.” Her father says with a smile and Seulgi can’t help but to smile along at the story. “Your mother is a hard worker too, I met her when we’re having a big meeting between companies. We head-butted a lot, but she makes me understand what family is and what is more important than career or money.”

 

Mr. Kang takes another deep breath and turns his head to Seulgi. “It’s you.”

 

“… Me?” Seulgi blinks, pointing a finger at herself.

 

“When I knew that your mother had you I—freaked out… Is that how you young people use that word?” The man frowns again and Seulgi has to hold back a snort.

 

“Yes, pretty much, but what about me, dad? Why were you freaked out?”

 

“Right, about you...” The man nods before continuing. “I freaked out because—I didn’t know… I married your mother and she’s my wife, but I didn’t know how to handle—a baby, a child, a daughter, I wasn’t ready to have you.”

 

Seulgi purses her lips and swallows dryly, feeling her heart clenches slightly at the words. She really has no idea where this conversation is going. Is he going to say that he’s disappointed at her? Is he going to say that he never loved her since the beginning? Seulgi’s heart beats rapidly in anticipation.

 

“I wasn’t ready to have you, but time waits for no one, so you’re eventually born and—“ Mr. Kang lifts a hand and moves his fingers slightly as if he’s trying to picture something with it. “And I saw you… So small and tiny, so fragile but—very beautiful…”

 

“And suddenly, my world got brighter, as if there’s a giant spotlight shining down upon me. It feels like I’m receiving a miracle in the form of a little baby girl. I’ve never felt something like that, not even when I got promoted or when I succeed a big project.” Mr. Kang says absently as if he’s recalling the moment.

 

Seulgi just stares quietly at her father, briefly wondering when was the last time they talk like this, when was the last time she listened to her father aside from study well or don’t skip meal.

 

“In that moment, I made a promise to myself, a promise that I have to fulfill as your father.” The man turns his head to Seulgi and purses his lips into a thin smile. “I promised that I will love you forever, no matter what you are or what you are going to be, I will always love you, my daughter.”

 

Seulgi in a deep breath at the words, feeling the tears start to brim in her eyes.

 

“Dad…” She mutters under her breath.

 

“You’re a bright girl, you’re going to shine so bright. You’ll be a star in the future, you’ll get into places, you will walk so far in life, and I’m going to love you through it all.” Mr. Kang says, smiling wider as he stares at his daughter. “And no matter how far you’ve walked, how high you’ve climbed, I will always be here, Seulgi. I will stay right behind you, watching your back as you move forward and everytime you feel like turning around, I will be there to help you move forward again.”

 

“If you told me that you wanted to be an artist, a model, an athlete, or anything as long as it can make you happy, I will keep loving you.” He says softly before turning his head back to the front, looking at the scenery in front of them.

 

Seulgi blinks and lets the tears trail down her cheeks, not even bothering to wipe them as she stares at her father with a smile.

 

“I’ve never been good at showing my affection, ask your mother about it - but I always try to show it in my way, by working hard so I can buy everything that you and your brother need… It might not be the best way or the right way, but it’s the only way I can show you how much I care for you, my little stars…” Mr. Kang smiles and sighs softly.

 

“I love you too, dad…” Seulgi sniffles softly, wiping the tears from her face with a hand. “I never seem to show it well, I never seem to bother everytime you left overseas, but I really love you and I missed you when you’re far...”

 

Mr. Kang lifts his head and turns to his daughter, staring at her with dumbfounded expression as if he doesn’t believe his ears.

 

“I still remember how you bought me ice cream even though mom told you not to. It’s our secret, you said… I remember you bought me cooking toy set when I told you I wanted one… I might not be a little girl anymore, but I’m still Seulgi, the girl that you carried on your shoulders everytime she told you that she wanted to fly…” Seulgi says between her sniffles, smiling sincerely at her father.

 

Mr. Kang blinks for couple of times and Seulgi swears she can see the other’s pair of eyes glistening slightly.

 

“Yeah…” Mr. Kang breathes out. “You are Seulgi, my little star… You will always be, no matter what you are.”

 

Slowly, he reaches a hand, so hesitantly and carefully as if he’s not sure if he’s doing the right thing. Seulgi gets the hint though, she smiles softly and leans closer, wrapping her arms around her father.

 

“Thank you, dad… Thank you for accepting me…” Seulgi hums softly, feeling her father her hair softly.

 

“I’ve made a promise ever since the first time I saw you… I didn’t regret it at all, and I know I never will…”

 

It feels funny hugging her dad. He’s no longer as high as the tree or as big as the mountain like how Seulgi used to remember when she’s a kid. It’s different now, Mr. he need to bend down and Seulgi can wrap her arms around her dad easily. She has grown up so much, yet it feels oddly nostalgic as if the moment when she sat on her father’s shoulder just happened a day ago.

 

She closes her eyes and smiles, feeling so blessed to have a family like this, to have someone who accepts her and Irene.

 

“So, how’s mom?”

 

Seulgi asks few minutes after her father starts to drive back to the house.

 

“She’s still a bit… Well, you know…” Mr. Kang purses his lips and his head to the side. “But I’ll try talking to her, don’t worry.”

 

“Thanks, dad.” Seulgi smiles softly and sighs. She’s actually surprised to find that her mother would be the one who had problem with this, she always thought that her father would be the problem, but she was wrong.

 

It’s as if she just started to know her family again after years.

 

“So, this girl.” Mr. Kang suddenly says, making Seulgi snaps out of her thought. “Her name is Irene, right?”

 

“Yeah.” Seulgi nods eagerly. “Bae Irene.”

 

“Bae Irene.” Mr. Kang repeats, as if tasting the name in his tongue. “How is she? Is she cheerful, or quiet, or smart…?”

 

“She’s really cheerful and very kind-hearted.” Seulgi smiles as she turns her head to the front, imagining Irene’s in her mind. “She’s strong but weak, wild but gentle, a very considerate person, yet stubborn… I—I can’t describe her, really.” She chuckles and shakes her head.

 

“It’s like she’s perfect, but when I think about it again, she’s actually not perfect.” Seulgi says, gesturing her hand as if it can help with the explaining.

 

Mr. Kang glances over at his daughter for a second before huffing out a small laugh. “That’s how I felt about your mother too.”

 

“Really?” Seulgi blinks rapidly, not expecting her father to say something like that. After all, her mother has always been a perfect woman in her eyes, there isn’t any flaw or imperfectness that Seulgi can point out about her mother except her busy life, but that’s not really a flaw, wasn’t it?

 

“Of course.” Mr. Kang nods lightly. “Nobody’s perfect, Seulgi.” He laughs, but then quickly adds. “Except you, my daughter is perfect.”

 

Seulgi snorts and shakes her head. Who knows after all this time, she can joke around again with her father. Who knows after all this time, his father is still the same man that she knew when she’s a kid.

 

“I’ll tell you when I’ll be home next time, maybe you can bring this girl—Irene over.” Mr. Kang hums as he turns the steering wheel. “I’m really curious about her…”

 

Seulgi turns her head to the man and smiles thinly. “You’re leaving again?”

 

Mr. Kang gives her a thin smile in return and sighs softly. “I’m going to US tomorrow morning, there’s something I need to take care of.”

 

Seulgi drops her gaze and nods her head in understanding, still keeping the smile on her face. She knows her father is a busy man and he’s doing it for the family, so she doesn’t have the right to be selfish. Besides, she’s not a kid anymore.

 

The car finally reaches the driveway and Seulgi steps out of the car with her father, walking over to the front door without saying a word. She slowly cracks the door open and finds that the lights of the living room has been turned off, which means her mother has went to bed.

 

“Go to sleep, you have school tomorrow.” Mr. Kang says softly and Seulgi nods with a small smile, making her way to the stairs until the call of her name stops her step.

 

“Seulgi.”

 

The said girl turns her head to her father who seems to be hesitating about something, his mouth opens and closes without any words. Seulgi tilts her head slightly and decides to turn her body around to face her father, waiting for him patiently.

 

“Seulgi, I—“ Mr. Kang pauses and the inner side of his cheek. “Do you want something from US? I can give you a teddy bear or something.”

 

Seulgi almost bursts into a loud laughter at her father’s awkwardness, but she decides to keep it in, fearing that she’d wake her mother up. She bites her lips and shakes her head.

 

“No need, I already had one.” She says with a smile.

 

“Your mom bought it for you?” Mr. Kang raises his brows. He remembers how his wife said something about not giving toys for Seulgi since she’s a grown up girl already, what she needs are clothes and jewelries, not dolls or toys.

 

“No.” Seulgi shakes her head. “Irene won it for me in a crane arcade.”

 

Mr. Kang gapes slightly for a second before nodding his head. “That’s great.” He nods his head again and slowly stretches his lips into a smile. “Goodnight, Seulgi.”

 

“Goodnight, dad.” Seulgi smiles again before turning around and ascends the stairs to her room.

 

 

____________________

 

 

 

“Noona.”

 

Seulgi perks her head up from her message with Irene on the phone to look at the boy who’s leaning against the doorframe of her room.

 

“What?” She asks, raising a brow questioningly.

 

“Noona.” Seulho walks over and sits on the bed. “Are you gay?”

 

The phone slips from her hands and drops to her lap, but she quickly picks it up again with both hands, staring at her brother with wide eyes.

 

“H-How?”

 

Seulho his lips and shrugs. “I heard your conversation with mom from upstairs.”

 

“Since when did you become an eavesdropper, huh?” Seulgi raises a brow and stares at her brother.

 

“I was on my way to the washroom.” Seulho answers casually. “But, is it for real? You like girls?”

 

“I don’t like girls, I just like—her.” Seulgi moves her hand, trying to explain her feelings. She never liked girls before and she doesn’t seem to have any interest with fellow girls other than Irene. Seulgi turns her head to her brother, only to see him staring at her with skeptical look on his face. “What?” She asks, squinting her eyes suspiciously.

 

“You don’t like girls.” Seulho repeats and nods his head. “Really, Noona?”

 

“What? I’ve always liked guys until she came.” Seulgi says defensively.

 

“Hmm, okay…” Seulho nods with a bored look on his face. “What is you favorite band?”

 

“Girl’s Generation.” Seulgi answers instantly. “Why?”

 

“Alright, your bias?” Seulho asks, raising his brows.

 

“Taeyeon.” Seulgi answers again, frowning at her brother’s random question.

 

“Why do you have a poster of Miranda Kerr in your room?” Seulho asks, pointing at the said model on the wall next to Seulgi’s bed.

 

“Why can’t I put her poster in my room? She’s a celebrity.” Seulgi raises her brow defensively.

 

“Why in her underwear, then?”

 

“Because she’s a Victoria’s Secret model, duh.” Seulgi rolls her eyes.

 

“Why not male actors?”

 

“Male actors wearing bra…?”

 

“No, I mean male celebrities in general.”

 

“It’s inappropriate.” Seulgi hums.

 

“I have posters of IU in my room, is it inappropriate?”

 

“It is.” Seulgi nods ignorantly.

 

“Noona!” Seulgo suddenly groans dramatically, making Seulgi flinches slightly at the sudden outburst. “Just admit it already!”

 

“Admit what?” Seulgi asks, utterly confused by her brother’s sudden change of attitude.

 

“Admit that you like girls!” Seulho says, moving his hands around. “It’s so obvious. I’ve known it since forever!”

 

“How could you know something that I didn’t know?” Seulgi fakes a gasp.

 

“Noona, seriously. I know. I don’t understand how mom and dad couldn’t see it through.” Seulho sighs and scratches the back of his head.

 

“Maybe because you’re wrong.” Seulgi hums before she speaks again, stopping her brother who seems that he’s about to argue some more. “So, what is it?”

 

“What is what?” Seulho blinks.

 

“Me liking girls and dating one.” Seulgi puts her phone down and stares at her brother, the same boy who thought that it was a good idea to stick a gum on her hair when she’s 10 years old. “What do you think about it?”

 

“I don’t think about anything.” Seulho frowns slightly. “Should I think about something?”

 

Seulgi blinks rapidly before shaking her head with a laugh. She reaches a hand to ruffle the boy’s hair, earning an unpleasant groan from the male as he moves away from the touch, making Seulgi laughs at the action.

 

“Thanks, Seulho.” Seulgi hums with a smile.

 

“You’re welcome.” Seulho replies while fixing his hair with a hand. “Is she hot?”

 

Seulgi’s smile falters immediately. “Why do you care?” She deadpans, squinting her eyes suspiciously.

 

“Yikes, jealous witch.” Seulho cringes and stands up from the bed.

 

“What did you just call me?” Seulgi widens her eyes and stands up from the bed too, chasing the boy around the house as if they’re ten years younger.

 

 

____________________

 

 

 

From: Seulgi

Everybody is ok about it. I don’t know about my mom, but they said she just needs some time to accept us.

 

Irene smiles at her phone before perking her head when she hears a sound from the front door. She places her phone on the desk and rushes out to the living room to greet her parents.

 

She stands in the middle of living room, watching her parents stepping in with a bigger suitcase in their hands, which means they’re going to stay here for a little while. Which means this is Irene’s chance to settle things for good.

 

Mrs. Bae takes off her shoes and lifts her head up, beaming when she sees the sight of her daughter.

 

“Irene, are you waiting for us?” She walks over to the girl and spreads her arms, letting Irene walks over and gives her mother a hug.

 

“Yeah, I have something to say.” Irene nods her head with a smile, eyeing her father who’s taking off his shoes.

 

“Oh? What is it?” Mrs. Bae blinks, totally have no idea what her daughter wants to talk about first thing after they got back from the states.

 

Irene takes a deep breath to prepare herself before she speaks out.

 

“I have a girlfriend.”

 

The room falls silent immediately. Irene can see how her mother literally freezes as if she stops breathing and her father who pauses at whatever he’s doing in the doorway. Irene closes her eyes and bites her lips, clenching and unclenching her hands on her sides, preparing herself for any reaction she’s going to receive.

 

After a long silence, her father finally speaks up.

 

“Change your clothes, Irene. We’re having a dinner tonight in your mother’s favorite restaurant.”

 

Irene snaps her eyes open and stares at her father who doesn’t even bother to look at her, he seems to be busy with his phone, judging from how he stares at it as he speaks.

 

“That’s right, sweetie. Why don’t you wear that white blouse—“

 

“Stop.”

 

Irene cuts the talk off harshly, if she’s not angry, she’d have feel extremely guilty for being so rude to her parents. But now she can’t give any about it, not when they’re being rude to her too.

 

“I am telling you that I have a girlfriend.” Irene lifts her head and stares at her mother’s stunned face. “You can’t just change the conversation like that. I am being serious.”

 

“Irene, watch your words.” Mr. Bae warns, making Irene turns her eyes to the man.

 

“Then look into my eyes when you speak, who is more important, your phone or your daughter?” Irene snaps angrily, feeling the tears burning behind her eyelids.

 

“Alright, sorry.” Mr. Bae says calmly and slips the phone into his pants pocket. He clears his throat and walks over to his wife, standing in front of Irene and stares at her. “So, what do you want us to say about this?”

 

“Anything! Anything about the thing I just told you, about me having a girlfriend.” Irene gestures wildly with her hands.

 

“Dear, it’s just a phase. What are you doing?” Mrs. Bae whispers softly.

 

“Mom, it’s not a phase.” Irene grits through her teeth, trying to hold back her anger. “How many times do I have to tell you that I’ve liked girls for years?”

 

“That’s because you haven’t find a good man.” Mrs. Bae replies.

 

Irene stares at her mother in disbelief before closing her eyes, taking some deep breaths to calm herself and not to scream in front of her parents.

 

“I can’t change, mom…” Irene mutters under her breath.

 

There’s a beat of silence and Irene prays that her parents wont change the topic of the conversation anymore, until her father speaks up again.

 

“Did you try to change?”

 

Something inside Irene’s head seems to snap at the words, she can even hear it herself.

 

Did she try?

 

Did they even look at her when she tried?

 

Did they know how much she tried all this time?

 

Irene shuts her eyes, trying to block the tears that threaten to slips out from her eyes. She clenches her hands on her sides so hard that she feels numb, trying to hold back all the burst of emotion that threatens to explode.

 

“What do you know?”

 

Irene grits through her teeth, looking up to her parents with anger flaring in her eyes. She notices that her vision is blurry because of the tears, but she doesn’t care.

 

“What do you know about me? What do you know about how hard I tried to be a daughter that you can be proud of? You have no idea how hard I tried to please you, to study, to win competition, to become a A+ student just for you!” She snaps. “But what did you do? Did you even look at me? Did you see how hard I tried?”

 

Work harder, study harder, you can do better. That’s all you’ve been saying to me! How can I be better than my best? Why can’t I be better? I kept asking myself those questions.” Irene starts to sob, but she knows she has to continue. “I kept on trying to be your amazing daughter, but did you bother to keep an eye of me? Did you even care?”

 

Irene ends her words and pants, catching her breath after the emotional outburst. It feels so awful yet so good to release all the things she has been holding all this time, to tell her parents about how she felt, to stop restraining herself and to break through the chains that bind her all this time.

 

Seulgi gives her the courage to do this, the courage to be herself, to courage to face her problem.

 

“You didn’t, right? You didn’t look at me, you just look at Unnie and Oppa because they’re great, because they work harder than me, is that it?” Irene lets out an exasperated sigh and looks up to her parents, still with tears running down her face. “Then you don’t need a daughter like me, right?”

 

With that said, Irene runs to the door and runs out of the house, ignoring her parents call from the inside of the house. She doesn’t even bring anything with her, not even her phone that she left on her room, not even wearing proper shoes to run – she’s still wearing her house sandals. Irene just keeps on running, letting her tears dry by the wind that blows on her face as she runs.

 

She doesn’t know where she’s running to, she just follows the street, turning when there’s a turn and goes straight when the road is clear. After her lungs demand for a proper supply of air, Irene stops running and braces herself on the wall beside her, panting as she tries to catch all the breath that she lost. Running too much makes her legs weak and she finds herself crouching down on the side of the street.

 

She then perks her head up to the street in front of her and just then she realizes that she hasn’t stop crying.

 

 


A/N

Aaaaaa sorry for the slow update, I've been busy with stuff hhhhhh and I just wrote a seulrene angst so I was trying to gather the fluff mood to continue this story phew

Here is the seulrene one-shot that I wrote if you want to read: Live (Warning: serious angst!!!)

So yeah, we have arrived to the family problem of Mama Kang and Bae family hhh I really didn't mean to make cliffhanger I swear I'm so sorry

Please do know that english is not my first language so you might find a lot of grammatical errors, typos and broken english, I am so sorry!

Comments, subscribes and upvotes are much appreciated, thank you so much!

Thank you so much for reading and I hope you enjoy the story!

 

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xiaojiajia
02/01/18 - Thank you everybody for sending this to the featured section I can't believe this akjsdfgh happy new year!!! <33

Comments

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Oct_13_wen_03 62 streak #1
Chapter 11: very beautiful ❤️
railtracer08
385 streak #2
Chapter 11: Cute💕 nice to see seulgi slowly opening up
Apcxjsv
#3
Chapter 11: Wonderfully imperfect 💗💛
_m3owrene
1023 streak #4
Chapter 11: ❤️‍🔥
Oct_13_wen_03 62 streak #5
Chapter 11: 🤍🤍🤍
AnneTokki #6
Chapter 10: I hope you can a part 2 of this 🥹🌟🌟🌟
gomtokkim
2140 streak #7
rereading<3
ReneSeul_9194 #8
Chapter 8: mr kang-great father
ReneSeul_9194 #9
Chapter 7: i really hope mrs.kang is a gud mom
ReneSeul_9194 #10
Chapter 6: i can't bear the fluff and the butterflies won't stop moving around my stomach