Songs that I listened to while writing this chapter.....

1. Neorago - Super Junior

2. All of Me - Arjun (It's an Indian song. The parts sung by the female singer are in hindi but you only need to understand the parts the male singer sang. And his lines are in English. So, please listen to it. This song describes Eunhyuk's emotions really well.)

3. One More Chance - Super Junior

 

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Eunhyuk tapped his foot on the ground in a rhythm with his thoughts. He was waiting in front of the school gate to talk to Donghae. 

 

It had been a week since his birthday and he was getting even more worried. The redheaded boy couldn’t concentrate in anything other than the brunette. At random times of the day, Eunhyuk would find himself staring at the pictures they took together. He would stare at the smile on Donghae’s face and then he would feel a clenching pain in his heart because he couldn’t see that smile anymore.

 

After the first few nights Donghae was gone, the redheaded boy had found himself wrapped in the warm blankets on the younger boy’s bed. Eunhyuk couldn’t sleep and it was also becoming obvious day by day as he looked so drained of sleep everyday. His eyes were bloodshot red because of the lack of rest but he couldn’t care less. He had been trying to talk to the brunette and make everything right but for some reason, even though Donghae had been attending school, he couldn’t get a glimpse of the younger boy anywhere. And not seeing the younger boy’s pretty face made him more miserable.

 

The lack of sleep was making him grumpy too and so after much consideration, he had found himself seeking comfort in the slightly faded smell of the brunette that still lingered in his pillow. So, Eunhyuk started sleeping in Donghae’s room instead of his own because it was the only comfort that let him get some sleep.

 

He knew that Donghae had come to school. All his friends or some of them saw him everyday. Then why couldn’t the redheaded boy find him anywhere? Eunhyuk had a feeling that Donghae was purposely avoiding him. There was no other explanation for it.

 

But he had to talk to the younger boy and make everything right. He needed to tell him that he didn’t do that intentionally that night.

 

Though it was all his fault, he couldn’t let Donghae go away. He couldn’t think of his life without seeing that beautiful smile everyday.

 

So, after a week of trying to catch up with Donghae in between classes or in lunchtime, Eunhyuk decided to skip his last class and wait outside the school gate so that whenever Donghae left the school, he could instantly face Donghae without the brunette having any chance to run away.

 

And as he saw Donghae hurriedly walking towards the gate before any other students had even come out, he knew that he had been right. About Donghae avoiding him and also about the fact that he could meet Donghae if he waited at the school gate.

 

As Eunhyuk was staring at the younger boy, taking in sight of him as much as he could because he hadn’t seen the younger boy for so long and he missed him, he was too late to notice that he had absentmindedly come out of his hiding place behind the wall and Donghae was now staring straight at him with a shocked expression.

 

And then Donghae ran, clutching onto the straps of his backpack tightly as he sprinted towards the direction he just came from.

 

“!” Eunhyuk cursed before he also ran after the brunette, following him through the corridors, “Donghae! ! Hae, wait!”

 

But Donghae didn’t wait. He ran even faster, not even knowing which corridor he was passing-by. He thought that maybe if he kept running, Eunhyuk would eventually stop following him but he was wrong because he could hear the other boy’s footsteps becoming even louder and faster.

 

“Why are you following me?” Donghae screamed, hoping that the elder boy wouldn’t be able to catch him. Damn his short legs!

 

“Because we need to talk, Hae! Stop running, please,” Eunhyuk screamed back.

 

“No, we don’t,” Donghae ran even faster, at his top speed so that he wouldn’t have to talk to Eunhyuk. He wasn’t ready to face him yet. He had cried himself to sleep the previous night, just like all the other nights after he left Eunhyuk. He didn’t want Eunhyuk to notice his red eyes and ask questions, he didn’t want to talk. He had finally set the redheaded boy free from the responsibilities of marriage and he thought Eunhyuk would be happy. Then why was he running after him like that?

 

Donghae was so busy running away and with his thoughts that he didn’t notice that he had reached the lockers and he was nearing the end of the corridor. And when he finally saw the lockers blocking his route, he cursed under his breath.

 

And then he was turned around by a strong grip on his shoulder and pinned to the locker. Donghae winced at the slight pain in his back.

 

His eyes widened as he saw Eunhyuk’s face so close to him, panting to catch his breath from all the running. Donghae was panting too but he didn’t have time to notice it because he cursed faintly again as he saw that he was trapped.

 

Each of Eunhyuk’s hands was resting on the lockers by both sides of his head and the former was staring at him intensely as his breathing became more stable.

 

Resting his forehead against the other boy’s, Eunhyuk sighed, “Why are you running away from me?”

 

Donghae’s whole body tensed up at the question. He could feel the elder boy’s breath fanning over his lips, hear the calm but demanding tone of Eunhyuk’s voice. He could feel Eunhyuk’s body pressing against his own in the gentlest touch.

 

He was afraid that if he even breathed, their lips would touch. “I-I’m not,” he answered, whispering almost inaudibly.

 

“Don’t lie, Hae,” Eunhyuk sounded like he was about to start pleading, “I know you are.”

 

Donghae didn’t reply. Eunhyuk was right because the brunette was trying to avoid him. He had been trying desperately not to show up anywhere near the elder boy. He would come to school very late, almost on time when the class was about to start so that he didn’t have to talk to Eunhyuk. When the bell rang, he would be out of the class before anyone else could so that Eunhyuk wouldn’t get the chance to stop him. He would eat dinner on the roof or the school backyard where the elder boy wouldn’t try to find him. And when school ended, he was quick to leave so that he wouldn’t run into the redheaded boy.

 

Donghae had noticed that Eunhyuk had been searching for him everyday but he didn’t understand why. Why would Eunhyuk want to talk to him so much when he should just be glad to be finally back to his old self when Donghae hadn’t invaded his life?

 

“What did you mean in the letter, Hae?” Eunhyuk questioned when Donghae didn’t look up. “Why aren’t you coming back to home?”

 

Donghae’s heart clenched at the question. Eunhyuk was so kind and considerate, worrying about him even though Donghae had been nothing but a burden on his shoulders that was only getting heavier day by day.

 

“I’m not going back, Eunhyuk. I’m letting you go,” Donghae replied with a small voice as tears welled up in his eyes.

 

The redheaded boy’s eyes widened in hurt at how Donghae was calling him Eunhyuk instead of calling him Hyukkie cutely like he always had.

 

“Why?” he inquired further, locking their eyes, staring deep into the younger boy’s brown eyes as he searched for the answers of those questions he wanted to ask Donghae.

 

The brunette averted his eyes downwards. Eunhyuk’s eyes were b with so many different emotions that it was beginning to overwhelm him. He knew that the redheaded boy felt guilty towards him. Eunhyuk was a kind man and maybe if Donghae hadn’t agreed to marry him and mess up his life, they could become friends.

 

But it was impossible at this point. If Donghae stayed with him anymore, the guilt of ruining the happiness of the man he loved would eat him alive. But if Eunhyuk knew that he was getting hurt too, the elder boy would probably feel bad about all of this. But Donghae didn’t want him to feel like that because it wasn’t Eunhyuk’s fault at all.

 

So, he had to lie.

 

“I-I’m getting tired of loving you, Eunhyuk. I don’t want to l-love you anymore,” he said with a small voice, trying to keep his voice firm so it wouldn’t crack.

 

Eunhyuk’s eyes widened in shock and he felt like someone just stabbed his heart with a knife, twisting it agonizingly to make his heart bleed from the abused wound. He doesn’t w-want to love me anymore?

 

“W-What? What do you mean?”

 

Donghae looked up and stared straight into his eyes.

 

“Just like I said in the letter, Eunhyuk. There’s no us anymore. Though there really wasn’t an us before, still consider that whatever force of responsibilities and duties we had, we are letting it all end. Now let me go,” Donghae tried to struggle out of Eunhyuk’s hold. He was struggling so hard not to shed tears but he wasn’t sure how long he could hold back.

 

He just wanted to jump into Eunhyuk’s arms and beg him to take him back, to give him another chance but he knew that he couldn’t be selfish. And even if Eunhyuk gave him another chance, there was no way the elder would ever fall in love with him.

 

He wasn’t pretty, hot or beautiful like all the girls out there. And he would never be. And binding the elder boy by his own selfish urges would only hurt them more.

 

But Eunhyuk could see the gloss in his eyes, could sense the wound Donghae was trying to hide in his heart. The way his lips were trembling was an enough giveaway of the emotions that were swirling in his mind. Eunhyuk knew that Donghae was lying.

 

He cupped the brunette’s face with his hands and brushed his thumb over his lower lip, freeing it from the unconscious bite of Donghae’s teeth, “Hae, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. Please, trust me. I-I don’t know that girl. I didn’t even have any idea about what was happening or else I would never bring her to our home. Please, believe me, please. Come back home, Hae. I miss you, please. I miss you so much.”

 

A tear slid down Donghae’s cheek, “Please, let me go. I don’t care about you anymore, Eunhyuk. Just let me go.”

 

“No,” the redheaded male shook his head firmly. He wasn’t going to let his Hae leave him so easily.

 

Closing his eyes, Eunhyuk only concentrated on the male before him and leaned forward with the intention of a kiss. Too engrossed in the moment, he didn’t hear the faint sound of footsteps and didn’t notice the way Donghae’s eyes widened in panic.

 

He groaned as the brunette stepped on his foot hard, backing away a bit by reflex and before his brain could register the happenings, Donghae took the chance to escape and sprinted down the hall.

 

“Hae!” Eunhyuk yelled after him, not being able to run after Donghae because of the pain in his foot.

 

“Dude, are you okay?” Eunhyuk only noticed then that Siwon was standing a short distance away in front of him. He sighed as he understood why Donghae ran away so suddenly.

 

“Yeah, I’m okay,” he replied, cursing inwardly for his friend’s bad timing.

 

He screamed loudly a few moments later, kicking the lockers in frustration only to wince as pain shot through his injured leg. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Eunhyuk’s eyes searched through the whole cafeteria with pure impatience in his eyes. He had a feeling that Donghae would come to the cafeteria for lunch that day. He didn’t know why but he just had that feeling and he knew that his gut feeling wasn’t wrong.

 

He was just afraid that even if Donghae came, the brunette would leave immediately seeing him before Eunhyuk even had the chance to notice him. So, he was trying to keep his eyes and ears open in case the brunette really came.

 

After that incident in the corridor near the lockers, Donghae had begun avoiding him again. The last couple of days, Eunhyuk saw no sign of him except for the class they had together but the brunette somehow escaped before he could corner him again.

 

Eunhyuk thought a lot about Donghae’s words. Some moments he would get scared thinking what if Donghae really didn’t love him anymore? But the next moment, his mind would remind him how the younger boy’s eyes said something different. His eyes were filled with so much love for Eunhyuk that even if he lied, just looking at his brown orbs were enough to tell all the truth.

 

“Hae, come here,” he suddenly heard Kyuhyun’s loud voice calling out and snapped his head towards the direction the taller boy was waving at.

 

He saw Donghae hesitating while staring at him and so he averted his eyes so that Donghae wouldn’t try to run away again.

 

“Hey, why are you standing there? Come join us. We don’t even see you around much these days,” Ryeowook complained. As Donghae still wasn’t moving, Ryeowook got out of his chair and dragged him to the table.

 

“Now sit,” he commanded, pointing at the empty chair beside Heechul who gave him a sympathetic look.

 

Donghae hesitatingly sat down, trying to mask his nervousness with a smile.

 

Hangeng suddenly remembered something after seeing his friend, “Oh, Hae, Hyuk was looking for you a few days ago. Did you guys talk?”

 

Donghae’s eyes widened in surprise, “U-Uh......he was?” He glanced at the redheaded boy who was now staring at him intensely and wasn’t even trying not to be so obvious about it.

 

“Dude, stop staring at him like you want to kill him. It’s freaking me out,” Kyuhyun muttered as he noticed the tense atmosphere between the two boys who couldn’t stand each other and always fought like enemies. He didn’t even understand why they refused to try to become friends.

 

Eunhyuk finally averted his eyes and began to eat his lunch quietly.

 

As all of them chatted and ate, the topic suddenly reached to having a hangout. They were trying to decide where to hang out when an idea came to Sungmin’s mind, “Guys, how about a sleepover?”

 

“That’s a very good idea,” Siwon nodded in agreement, “But to whose place?”

 

Eunhyuk thanked the heavens in his head because he had the perfect opportunity to know where Donghae lived after leaving their apartment. He just needed to convince everyone to go to Donghae’s new apartment or wherever he lived. He wasn’t going to call it the brunette’s home because he already had a home in which Eunhyuk was waiting for him to come back.

 

“How about we all go to Donghae’s place?” Eunhyuk smirked.

 

 

 

 

 

 

The sky looked gloomy and cloudy. Eunhyuk was sure that it would start raining soon. It was almost evening and Eunhyuk wanted to give a visit to Merin’s café.

 

He wanted to see Donghae so badly that his feelings were getting uncontrollable. He promised himself that he wouldn’t try to talk to the brunette when he was working. He’d just sit in a corner and watch him so that the longing in his heart would somewhat become endurable.

 

Parking his car in a nearby parking lot, Eunhyuk walked the two minutes distance to the café. He halted in his steps when he saw Donghae through the window, serving the customers.

 

Donghae was wearing his uniform for the café and Eunhyuk stared because he looked good in that. The apron he was wearing made the elder boy wonder if Donghae would look even prettier if he had worn that while working in the kitchen in their apartment. He’d look perfect, just like a house-wife.

 

Smiling at his own thoughts, Eunhyuk entered the café. As the bell of the café entrance rang, it picked some of the customers and employees’ attention.

 

Donghae also looked up and froze when he saw who it was. With a little wave at the brunette, Eunhyuk sat down at one of the tables.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Eunhyuk inserted the key in the ignition and started his car. He carefully drove out of the parking lot and towards the direction of his apartment.

 

Donghae’s shift was over and so when the brunette left to the staffs’ room to change into his clothes, Eunhyuk decided to take his leave too.

 

If he had wanted, he could confront the brunette again but instead, he had decided to just watch him. Eunhyuk knew that if he tried to talk to him, he would’ve run away again. But the redheaded boy wanted to feel his presence to soothe his broken heart so he didn’t approach Donghae.

 

And after watching Donghae work around the café for two hours, he had felt a sense of familiarity and it was surprisingly calming. If Donghae wanted space, then at least Eunhyuk could go to the café to see him.

 

As the redheaded boy’s car reached the apartment building, suddenly some drops of water started falling onto the front glass of his car. With furrowed eyebrows, he noticed that it was raining.

 

How will Hae leave the café in the rain? he thought as worry began flowing into his mind.

 

Making up his mind, Eunhyuk turned his car around and started driving towards the café again. He knew that Donghae wouldn’t want to ride in his car with him but he would convince the brunette because he couldn’t let him walk in the rain and catch a cold. Not when there was nobody to take care of him in his new place.

 

As he parked his car in front of Merin’s café, he got out and ran inside. He saw Kei and walked to her, “Hey, Kei, where is Hae?”

 

Kei looked surprised at his sudden appearance, “You mean Donghae? He already left a couple of minutes ago.”

 

Eunhyuk thanked her and left the café with hurried steps. What if Donghae was walking in the rain and got sick?

 

He didn’t see the brunette in the streets when he was driving to the café so he guessed that Donghae must be walking towards the opposite direction.

 

And he was right. He could see Donghae standing under the shade of the bus stop as he came near.

 

Eunhyuk stopped his car in front of the younger boy who looked up hearing the sound of the tyres of the car.

 

“Get in,” Eunhyuk called out as he lowered the glass of the window.

 

Donghae eyes were wide with surprise but he soon composed himself and shook his head, “No, I’m okay. Thanks.”

 

Eunhyuk frowned, “Hae, it’s raining. How will you go home in this weather? Please, get in.”

 

Donghae shook his head again, “No, Eunhyuk. I’m okay really. I can go by myself. Or I can just take the bus.”

 

Eunhyuk sighed, “What if the bus is late?”

 

“I’ll wait,” Donghae replied firmly.

 

Eunhyuk ruffled his red hair in frustration, ”Hae, I’m sorry. But please, get in. I don’t want you to become sick.”

 

“Go home, Eunhyuk,” Donghae protested.

 

The brunette was nervous as he saw how the rain started pouring even harder but he didn’t want to bother Eunhyuk. He was really touched that Eunhyuk cared for him. Did he come back for me because it is raining? He could feel his heart warming at the thought.

 

But then he saw the redheaded boy getting out if his car and panic filled his mind. Without caring about anything else, he started running. He knew that he was acting like a coward but he didn’t want Eunhyuk to ask him those questions again. Because he couldn’t lie again. It was painful enough when he had to lie in his face in the corridor the other day.

 

“Hae, wait! You’re getting drenched,” he could hear the elder boy shouting behind him.

 

Donghae tried to speed up his pace only to stumble badly. He could feel the fear of getting hurt settling in his mind, making him gasp.

 

But then there were arms wrapping around his waist, saving him from the fall and hugging him protectively.

 

“Be careful,” he heard Eunhyuk’s reassuring voice whispering in his ear.

 

Donghae’s fear lessened slowly, feeling the elder boy’s chin resting on his shoulder.

 

When he finally registered their position, he tried to struggle, “Let me go.”

 

“You’re running away again. Why do you always run away from me, Hae?” he heard the redheaded boy ask.

 

They were standing in the rain, one holding the other, refusing to let go and the other trying to struggle free. The rain was pouring heavily but none of them paid any heed to it. They were drenched from head to toe, shivering from the cold but enjoying each other’s warmth.

 

Eunhyuk wished that he could hold Donghae like this forever without the younger boy trying to run away.

 

“Please, baby. Tell me how should I make you forgive me?”

 

The term baby surprised Donghae because why would Eunhyuk call him that? But at the same time, he was sure that if it wasn’t so cold and the night wasn’t so dark, Eunhyuk would see how his cheeks warmed up with color. Donghae turned around, facing Eunhyuk who had a desperate look on his face. And if the rain wasn’t there, he might’ve seen the tears sliding down the elder boy’s cheeks.

 

“You did nothing wrong, Eunhyuk. So, why should I forgive you? It’s you who should forgive me, can you?” Donghae muttered, feeling the guilt clawing up his heart again.

 

“Why, Hae? It’s me who has been wrong all this time. It’s me who has been making you suffer alone. I know you can’t forget what I did so easily but please, give me a chance.” Eunhyuk cupped Donghae’s face. He didn’t want to break down in front of Donghae but he knew that he would soon.

 

A lot of emotions played in Donghae’s eyes at the same time but one of those was anger. He didn’t understand why Eunhyuk was even bothering running after him because he clearly remembered what he had told Heechul in the bathroom.

 

“What do you want, Hyukkie? I’m finally doing what you wanted so why? You were forced to marry me and you don’t even love me. You never will. I’m a man. I’m not pretty, I’m not beautiful. Y-You’ll never be able to h-hold me the way you hold all those girls and I...... I’m just not good enough for you. So, please, I know that you were going to leave me someday anyway. But it’ll hurt so much more to....... to see you with the girl you love.” Donghae was sobbing by then, “I don’t think I can wait for that day so please, let me stop now. Let me stop hoping that I can have you one day because I know t-that...... I can’t. Please, don’t make this harder for me. I’m letting you go before you do.”

 

Donghae panted after finishing his complains and then, a bus came and Donghae got in, leaving Eunhyuk in the rain.

 

As the bus went away, Eunhyuk finally let himself break down. He fell onto his knees and sobbed hard, resenting himself again and again for what he had done. But why couldn’t Donghae see that he was hurting too?

 

He was hurting so much because he didn’t think that he could be alive if the brunette didn’t come back to his life. He’d do anything just to wake up next to his Hae again. He’d do anything but Donghae didn’t want him anymore. He didn’t want to live if Donghae wasn’t there to share his life with him.

 

“But I don’t want you to let me go, Hae. I don’t want you to stop loving me,” he sobbed harder.

 

The rain stopped after a while, leaving after it left traces of the water everywhere.

 

Donghae was just like the rain. He came and left his traces everywhere in his life. And when Eunhyuk got used to being loved by him and learned to love him back, he left like the rain.

 

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 A/N: So, my exams are finally over and I finished writing this chapter. Thanks a lot, guys, for supporting me so much and waiting patiently. I'm so sorry that I've been making you guys cry with all these angst but I promise that this is the last chapter that you're crying while reading. (Though I don't know if this chapter made you cry.)

 

SJ is finally back! Donghae's song is soooo damn beautiful I can't live, omg! The last scene of this chapter was planned by me a long time ago but after listening to One More Chance, it became so much easier to write it. Are you guys streaming? Please, let's support our boys as much as we can and I can't wait for Black Suit to finally release. They all looked so beautiful in the trailers!

 

I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I'm so happy that you guys are loving this story, upvoting and commenting. Thanks a lot for your support. I'll start writing the next chapter tomorrow and try to update it sooner. My results will come out the same day Black Suit will release. So I'm really nervous. Thanks for wishing me.

 

I hope you listened to the songs I recommended and enjoyed them. Please, leave comments for this chapter too. Love ya all~ <333