Sehun paces up and down his bedroom floor, his kitten lazily watching him as he does so. His exams were just two weeks away, and he was internally and externally panicking. A week or so before, he was ready for this exam and felt like he would pass easily. At this moment however, he felt that if he was to take the exam now, he would fail and never get into university.

He only had himself to blame though. If he hadn’t had kissed Jongdae, he would have still gone to those tutoring sessions. If he didn’t have such an inflated ego, he would have sorted things out with Jongdae and not do what Kyungsoo had done with Jongin. He hadn’t sorted it out yet, and Sehun feared that he was going to be worse than Kyungsoo was.

Every couple of days since kissing him, Sehun would still get a call or a message from Jongdae. His most recent one reminding Sehun that he couldn’t put his future in jeopardy because of the incident. Sehun had expected him to come to the café, and a part of him felt offended when Jongdae hadn’t. Now that he thought back to it, maybe it was for the best that Jongdae didn’t come.

“I’m gonna have to go see him” Sehun says out loud, turning towards his kitten who only blinks at him in return.

“Wow, thanks for the moral support Vivi” he says sarcastically, reaching for his phone and sending a message to Jongdae before he chickened out.

Exams are in two weeks and I’m panicking. Help.

Sehun doesn’t have to wait long for Jongdae to reply. He could do a session in two days’ time. Sehun could go after he finished work, texting Jongdae back the time he could be there by.

“No going back now Vivi” he says, flopping down onto his bed with a sigh, his pet under the chin when she cuddles up to him. There was definitely no way he could back out now.

“Here” Jongdae says, handing Sehun a glass of juice and sitting down next to him.

This had been the second day in a row that Sehun was over Jongdae’s place getting ready for his exams. He had been there since ten that morning and it was only three hours later that Jongdae had called for a lunch break. Now, the two of them were sat in silence, the television acting as background noise for them.

“Eat” Jongdae next says, nudging Sehun’s plate towards them. Neither of them had spoken about the kiss since Sehun had arrived the evening before, but both of them were still obviously tense from it. The atmosphere was too awkward between them and though Sehun tried, he couldn’t concentrate.

“I’m sorry, about the whole… kissing you thing.”

Jongdae sighs and shakes his head. “Not now, not while your exams are around the corner.”

“We’ll need to talk about it eventually” Sehun argues back, feeling angry that Jongdae just brushed his apology to the side like that. “It’s obvious we’re both still thinking about it!”

“Alright, you wanna talk about it? How about you start by telling me why you did it?” Jongdae asks angrily. Sehun pauses at the question. How was he supposed to answer this without making things worse than they already were?

“Wasn’t it obvious?”

“You did it because you were happy about the university offer. It was a spur of the moment thing. Right, I get it” Jongdae replies, almost bitterly by the sounds of it. His reply stuns Sehun before he regains his composure.

“N-no! That’s not it!” he exclaims, “I’ve been crushing on you for ages! I kissed you because I like you… I really like you.”

For a second, Jongdae’s expression looks hopeful. Sehun barely catches it before Jongdae scoffs. “As if you like me, you’re only eighteen” he mutters, getting up before Sehun pushes him back down.

“Even though I was to you in the beginning, you still kept trying to talk to me. You even cracked really bad jokes hoping to make me laugh every time we had a session” he begins, watching Jongdae’s reaction before he starts again. “When I argued with my parents, you never brought it up, instead you carried on like nothing had happened and made me forget about them for a while. When I said I wanted to be a teacher, you didn’t laugh at me like others did. Instead you helped me with everything and never gave up on me. I was proud because you were proud of me. I deliberately kept some of my grades low so that you’d keep tutoring me… I didn’t want to lose you!”

“You’re too young” Jongdae says quietly, “You say this, but you’re still a young man. You still have to go to university. And then what? What if you meet someone your own age? I’m too old for you.”

“Age doesn’t matter!” Sehun shouts in frustration. “Though not exactly parents of the year, there’s almost a ten-year gap between my mum and dad, and they’ve been happily married for almost thirty years!”

Something about Jongdae’s expression makes him look hopeful at Sehun’s words, but even then, he still has his doubts. “You’re not nineteen yet. If anything, this would be illegal.”

“Then we won’t do anything until after my birthday! We’ll just pass it off as tutoring sessions or I’ll tell my parents I’m at work or with friends. We’ll figure something out Jongdae! Please stop making this difficult for me!”

Jongdae remains silent and Sehun begins to wonder if he’s just screwed it all up again, thinking of something to say that he can make another quick exit and leave it that for the day.

“You’re gonna be the death of me one day Sehun” he finally says, the grin on his face making Sehun relax for the first time since he had arrived. Jongdae was still sat down, looking up at Sehun with the warmest expression the latter had probably seen him give before. Hesitantly, Jongdae takes Sehun’s hand in his, gently running his thumb over Sehun’s palm.

Did this mean that the two of them were okay now? That Jongdae like Sehun as well? He made a whole speech about how he was too old for Sehun, so that must have meant he was only insecure about his age because he had feelings for Sehun as well, right?

“Can I… can I kiss you again?” Sehun asks, needing to be absolutely sure that this was what Jongdae wanted.

There’s a pause, and both stare at each other silence before Jongdae finally nods his head. Sehun’s nervous again. Jongdae was now letting Sehun kiss him again, there was no way Sehun could screw this up now.

“I’m gonna be thirty by the time you kiss me” Jongdae teases, making Sehun smile and lightly kick his legs. Finally, Sehun starts to lean down and Jongdae meets him halfway, finally getting to kiss him again.

Jongdae was wrong. He was actually gonna be the death of Sehun one day. 

And 30 chapters later, they're all finally together... thank if you ask me! If you guys were getting frustrated by how much was going on, I was getting frustrated... I write this thing! 

Now I can get onto the next couple of chapters where I have all these cute little things planned. It's gonna be great! 

Until then!!