I could feel his hands on my neck, his grip on my hips, and the burn from the steam engine at my back. His breath and his voice were echoing in my head. It was the middle of the night, and I had just woken up from the nightmare of reliving the horrible events of the day before. Sweat dripped down my spine as I fought to catch my breath. Even though I was awake, I felt like Jae was still lurking in the darkness, waiting to take hold of me again. The main hall was practically pitch black, but as my eyes adjusted, I found just a little comfort in the diffuse light from the night sky filtering through the windows. Slowly, I moved back so I could lean my back against the wall, letting my head fall back against the concrete with a soft thump. Continuing to breathe heavily through my mouth, I took a look around at the room full of sleeping bodies. It was tempting to wake Yoongi up, but both warning and experience had taught me that it was a potentially catastrophic mistake. So instead, I let my eyes close as I made a concerted effort to calm myself down. I hadn’t even noticed that I had been crying until I felt a drip fall onto my collar. I was reaching up to rub my eyes with my sleeve when I heard the quiet sound of movement. Gripped with fear, I snapped my eyes open to find a tall silhouette at my bedside. Instantly I shrank back away from the figure, nearly falling off of my cot in the process.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay,” a low whisper spoke urgently as the silhouette came closer. Relief washed over me. I knew that voice anywhere. As I pressed my hand against my sternum to calm my erratic heartbeat, Taehyung gently sat on the steel pipe frame of the bed. A glint of moonlight shone on his face, revealing his deeply concerned expression, his already over-expressive face pulling into a deep frown, his brows inclined into his rusty hairline. “Are you okay?” he finally whispered again as he stretched over to pull me back properly upright.

I relaxed into his touch, still trying to recover from the scare. “Yeah,” I finally breathed, glancing up into his narrow eyes briefly. “Nightmare.” He looked like he wanted to talk more, to ask questions, but to my surprise and great joy, he let him mouth close with a little click of his teeth. And then he was moving to lay down on my cot, and I couldn’t help but stare at him for a long moment. “Taehyung?” I prompted in a quiet whisper.

He gave me a little grin before patting the space next to me, “You need to sleep, and I don’t think you want to be alone.” He was right, of course, but I was still apprehensive. Of course, TaeTae saw right through me, and I heard him stifle a laugh, “Come on, it’ll be fine, I’ll just tell Yoongi you invited me into your bed.”

With a quick jerk of my hand, I gave him a quick jab to the ribs, though I couldn’t repress my smile. Taehyung moved quickly to cover his mouth to suppress his giggle, though he made no indication of moving. I knew I shouldn’t have been surprised that they all knew about what happened with Yoongi and I. As Hobie and Namjoon had both told me in the past, they had nothing better to do than turn my love life into their own personal soap opera. Relenting to Taehyung’s stubbornness, I slid down the wall back into the bed in the narrow space remaining. It made me wonder how Taehyung and Hobie bunked together so often- it was a tight fit. But then again, the closeness was certainly comforting. Just hearing Taehyung’s deep and even breathing helped me to relax, coaxing me back to sleep.

It had felt like I had just closed my eyes when a rather loud noise woke me up. To my surprise, it was daytime, bright light filling the entire room. So I must have been asleep for some time. I sat up suddenly, causing an unhappy groan to come from beside me. My bleary eyes and fuzzy head were having a hard time putting together what was happening. Taehyung must have still been asleep, so the sound came from somewhere else. Squinting slightly, I looked up, only to be met with a very confused looking Yoongi. “Oh hey, Yoongi,” Taehyung greeted brightly as he sat up next to me. “Zoey had a nightmare,” he spoke quickly, much to my relief. I had half expected him to actually antagonize Yoongi about it.

Yoongi’s scowl only deepened, though his eyes softened considerably. “Why didn’t you wake me?” he asked me earnestly, stepping forward to sit lightly on the cot frame.

I did my best to reassure him with a smile, “Yoongi, the very first rule I was taught when I got here six months ago was ‘don’t wake up Yoongi, he loves sleep more than any of us’, remember?” He looked away, mumbling something unintelligible. I could have sworn his neck began to turn a slight tint of red. “And you almost took my hand off when I almost woke you up on accident that one time,” I reminded him, doing my best to keep my tone light in order to get that frown off of his face.

When he glanced back at me over his shoulder, his one weary eye peered at me over his little half-smile. “Yeah, yeah, don’t remind me,” he mumbled, though I could tell his mood had already improved. When our gaze met, I was struck by a thought. During my half-year stay at the compound, I had done everything in my power to build my relationships with each of the boys entirely on emotional trust and support. Of course I knew they were all attractive young men who had once been idols with obnoxious screaming fangirls, but I did my best to ignore that. Sure, there had been that one time I caught myself staring at Hobie while he changed his shirt, and there was my initial gawking of Jungkook when I first laid eyes on him, my brief fascination with Jin’s face, and the time I briefly watched Yoongi sleep before he nearly murdered me. But in the grand scheme of things, those moments were few and far between. But now, after sharing that one agonizingly brief kiss with Yoongi, it was like a switch had been flipped in my brain, allowing myself to really look at him. It was probably not a good idea to start staring mid-conversation, but there was an indescribably comfort knowing that the feeling was mutual.

My brief moment of reverie was interrupted, however, when a sharp cramping pain jolted through my whole body, originating from my lower abdomen. As soon as I flinched, I remembered. “I should probably head to the MedLab now,” I groaned quietly through my teeth, trying to breathe through the pain. I began to grow worried- that pain had felt internal. What if I was bleeding from my injuries? Despite my quiet tone, the entire room must have heard me as it grew somberly silent.

“I’m coming with you,” Yoongi announced. It was not a question, and judging by his suddenly very serious face, he wasn’t about to accept an argument. I was tempted to turn him down anyway, mostly out of habit. For one, I had never needed an to the Med Lab, but mostly the idea of being along with Yoongi again made me nervous. Not the typical bad kind of nervous, but the what-if-it’s-awkward kind of nervous. Were we going to talk about it? Was it going to just be silent? Despite the questions swirling through my mind, it was already too late to refuse. Yoongi was already up by the door, holding it open for me.

Taehyung helped me to stand, and I was pleased to find that my legs still worked just fine. Hesitantly, I walked to catch up with Yoongi. I was stopped, however, by Jungkook, who was leaning by the door. “Hope everything is okay,” he spoke lowly but urgently to me, grabbing me gently by the arm.

I gave him a little smile and a nod, “Me too,” I agreed before glancing pointedly at Yoongi on the other side of the doorway. “And thanks… for yesterday.”

“Glad everything worked out,” he responded with a little smug grin. “Now you’d better go before he glares at me again.” He released his grip on my elbow, though I saw his eyes wander to where Yoongi was standing. I rolled my eyes to myself as I watched the chilly exchange. Clearly Jungkook had an affinity for messing with people, and Yoongi was an easy target.

Taking Jungkook’s advice, I removed myself from the situation to join Yoongi, the door closing quickly behind us. We began to walk in silence out the compound and through the gate, stepping onto the slightly icy dirt path. The snowfall from earlier had compacted and refrozen, a phenomena I knew existed, but had never experienced. I was very self-conscious of every step I took, but despite my best efforts, I nearly slipped, a high-pitched squeak escaping my lips as I scrambled to right myself. Thankfully, I did not fall, but the embarrassment still came as a little stifled chuckle came from beside me. I could tell he was trying not to laugh audibly, but he was failing. “Are you okay?” he finally spoke, still trying to disguise his giggles.

“I’m fine,” I grumbled, pressing my hand to my sternum to calm my deviant beating heart. With a defiant frown on my face, I began to walk forward again, my legs stiff and wary. In just a couple of steps, I felt unsteady again. Before I could even think of wavering, I felt Yoongi’s cold, but firm hand take mine.

I looked over at him, surprised by the sudden contact, but he was looking anywhere but at my face. “Come on, we’ll take it slow,” he murmured as he tugged me along. And in that moment, I suddenly felt very normal. There we were, nervously holding hands like any other new, young couple. He had held my hand before, but now it was different. And if I were being honest, I didn’t want to waste time being awkward. I absolutely relished the feeling of normalcy in my fluttering romantic girl heart, but I was also on my way to the MedLab to get my assault injuries treated. Nothing about this situation was normal.

Gripping Yoongi’s hand a bit tighter to get his attention, I looked at him expectantly. As I predicted, he looked at me quickly, brows raised as we came to a stop. “Yoongi,” I spoke warmly, then realized I had no idea what to say. I needed a subject. Slightly stammering, I managed to speak, “You weren’t upset about Taehyung this morning, were you?” I realized very quickly that asking about his potential jealousy wasn’t exactly calming small talk. Thankfully, he broke into a little laugh before pulling my hand gently to start our slow walk again.

“No, not really,” he admitted, his voice still carrying an air of amusement. “You’re right, if you had woken me up, I might have been an ,” he admitted. I was glad he had relaxed, at least. “Plus,” he added offhandedly, “I’ve watched you walk into that back room with Jungkook every night for six months. I think I can handle just about anything you can throw at me by now.”

My heart sank at his words. I felt guilt consume me. “You know I’ll still have to be with Jungkook every night once I’m recovered, right?”

“Oh, I know,” he answered, though there was a hint of bitterness in his low voice. “But as I said,” he pulled me a little closer to his side, “I’ve had half a year to come to terms with that.”

Tentatively, I spoke again, lacing my fingers through his as if holding his hand tighter would prevent him from fleeing. “And you still want to be… with me anyway?” I finally managed to choke out the question.

We kept walking, but Yoongi gave my hand a gentle little squeeze, “Yes I still want to be with you,” he replied, his voice dripping with sarcasm at the ‘with’ word, clearly mocking me. Still, I appreciated that he was taking the conversation lightly. We both felt awkward enough as it was. “And what about you?” he finally looked over at me, making brief eye contact, “I know