It's turned into a monster.

Like, really. It wasn't meant to go on as long as it has on Word.

But like...the more I write about it, the more I develop Hyukjae and Donghae's character, the more I touch on their pasts and watch them interact both on paper and behind my eyelids, the more I kind of want to expand on their story.

And so, I think I kind of need to explain where this story is going to go, just so you guys know where it'll be headed, so you can unsubscribe if it's not your cup o' tea.

It's not a simple love story, and it's not a pretty one. A majority of it will be ugly (already is ugly), and honestly I don't know how many of you will like it as it goes on. It gets questionable, kind of dirty and gritty at times; neither Hyukjae or Donghae are perfect, they're not meant to be, but they make mistakes more often than not. They hurt each other on purpose, emotionally and physically; yes, there will be moments of abuse, but both are victims as well as monsters. The is almost never out of passion but rather out of anger and hatred. There is no definite good guy and no definite bad guy; their relationship is unhealthy, really. However, it doesn't just stay that way; between the really terrible times, there are some good times. There are some sweet moments inbetween the spiteful words, sometimes the isn't bruising, and sometimes they might think that their hatred is just a mask for something else.

I can't say if the ending is good or bad because frankly that would be giving too much away; I will say it doesn't end on a particularly high note, but nor does it end in terrible heartbreak and "they'll forever be alone".

What I will say though, is that I've tried very hard to make these characters realistic; it's worked out in my head, so I can only hope it comes across that way on paper.

Donghae isn't going to be the typical fanfic Donghae, and neither is Hyukjae. Donghae is not very whiny (accept occasionally when inebraited), and he's not codependant; and with Hyukjae, while he is independant and takes the lead on occasion, is very uncertain about everything and borders on scaredy when it comes to certain things. I can't give away too much else about how they will develop or how they are, because that's what the story is for. But I will tell you that Donghae is not the type to rely solely on someone else to heal; he's not the type of character that wants to go through life with someone holding his hand and babying him. Some have expressed some concerns that Donghae's going to end up "only living/getting better for Hyukjae" but I just want you guys to be rest assured that Donghae most certainly isn't like that in this story. Honestly he's the type of character that if he's going to do anything, it's going to be for himself, because he wants to, not because someone asked him to.

Can't reveal much else, but hopefully you guys just take my word for it ^^.

And also, for those that were curious about the title of the story, I already kind of explained in my last blog. Basically, on my new meds, all I want to do is sit around and listen to The Smiths (and praise Morrissey for the almighty being that he is (phantom voice and all)). And, sometimes, The Smiths inspire some of the darkest, weirdest story ideas from me.

This story was inspired by the song of the same name, which for those that want to give it a listen: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VHnt3o_nAVo

Also on another note, for those that didn't see the story message/alert, the next chapter will indeed be Donghae's point of view ^^ I decided that would make the most sense, since we already got a deep (deeper than intended, actually) look into Hyukjae's head, it's only fair to see Donghae's side too.

[Sorry about the rambles btw. Haven't slept in two days, been in a lot of pain and a constant state of anxiety ._. this is what happens, kids.]