I don't think I show affection for this girl enough, seriously she means so much to me - like way more than I can put into words. Shes been there for me for four years now and what have I ever done for her? I feel like I've done nothing to fully show my appreciation for having her in my life. 

Ash, I know I don't show it but you're my bestfriend and you can tell me anything, whenever you need a shoulder to lean on mines always free - but only for you because you're my special friend haha!

I know that I hurt you when I broke our relationship off them times, and when I spoke to you like for no reason or when I got too posessive towards you and I'm sorry about that. I would just get so jealous, and I still do! When I'm not talking to you I want to be, I just want to be around you every second possible. You're like all I think about 24/7 lol.

I want you to know that you have no reason to be guilty about the arguments that we had, its all my fault, it always is. You're amazing for putting up with my bull for so long. But I guess I started the arguments because at least then you were there adn we were talking because all I wanted to be is as close to you as I can be, if that makes sense? I'm sorry I got jealous because you were busy helping your dad work and I'm sorry I expected you to pick me up when Spot died. 

And all them things I said about getting that flat with you and moving to London and going to the same university as you, I'd still love to do all that, even if it isn't as girlfriends. I'd still love to cuddle you and be your teddy, and get a ferret named Chases with you haha, and watch movies with you and try not to bite eachothes heads off. I know its lame but I really can't see myself ever stopping talking to you because you're my baby...

I think you're the only person I've ever really shown myself to, and thats what makes you so special to me. I appreciate you more than air.

And even though we're not dating, I still love you because you're perfect. I just care so much about you, I care about your wellbeing, like how you're going to come out to your family, because I don't want you to get hurt. I care about how you're feeling even though I don't show it or act like it (like ever I think and I hate it js) but I do. You're all I ever think about and its really annoying because its gives me headaches wondering who you're talking to and what you could be doing at that moment or what class you're in at your posh sixth form. You're the most important person in my life and always will be.

I love the fact that we have a song, I love the fact that you're still bothering to talk to me even though I hurt you so many times and I love the fact that you're a part of my life.

I just love you.