Why is life so unfair? You love her, she tells you she loves you even if she has a girlfriend. But you're pretty sure you love her more than she loves you. And you're pretty sure she loves her more than she loves you. Why can't you love yourself more than you love her? Why can't you give yourself that respect and care you so badly want from her? Why can't you just let her go? Why can't you end your pain? It's up to you anyway. It's up to you to say "I don't want to be your option anymore" or "please, just let me go." You need to see you're worth so much more, you deserve so much better than being a secret affair.