I still get surprised about the fact that my brain can get preoccupied with thinking about school when I literally don't give two s about school... Does that make sense? Of course it doesn't. Well, what I mean is that, I'm not really studious, I don't pay extra attention to school and I don't exert half as much of the efforts that are actually needed for it. I kinda just literally go there, do stuff sometimes, but most of the time I'm stressed about it. Probably this happy-go-lucky attitude adds up to that stress, because the anxiety piles up and lots of works are getting stacked up unnoticed. I'm still slightly *shookt* over the fact that I do almost nothing for school and yet it stops me from doing things that I actually wanna invest my time in. HA HA HA I'm a useless piece of , I know. I'm not self-pitying when I say that, it's a god honest fact about myself. No worries, I've kinda learned to accept that.
On the lighter side of things, speaking of learning to accept facts about myself, I'm probably speaking a little too soon, but I'm kinda slowly becoming able to handle myself better these days. I still get angry, cranky, and still a lot whiny, but when I complain about things, I let myself complain. I mean, I'm finally able to express my emotions more without having to feel the need to regret about it later. I'm me, happens to me, and I have the right to be ty for feeling ty. I'm not the best person in the world, and I don't want to be that. Almost all of the people who sees me complaining probably doesn't even care about me, so why should I feel guilty about letting my frustrations out? If they're affected, well, not my fault.
Yes, I'm finally able to feel less responsible about what other people feel about me, and I'm slowly unlearning the unhealthy habit of giving a about what other people think.
What are you guys doing anyway? How have you been? :D