I’ve been meaning to write a blog post in regards to these topics for a while, but haven’t had the chance.  If anything at all, I’m forcing myself to write this post in between the many things that I currently have to do.  

    Although this may or may not concern my readers, I’m sure they’ve noticed that I have been writing less.  Yes, I am busy but I know that I could squeeze in some time to write a bit here and there.  Well, I’m not going to lie.  There’s many times I just don’t feel like writing.  And, that’s just it.  I don’t know how other authors do it, but when I don’t feel like it, I just don’t feel like it.  

    In addition, I’ve beginning to feel like I’m becoming even less creative than before.  I just don’t feel like my stories are up to par with others.  (Unfortunately, the most I ever read would be descriptions because I’m not really a fan of reading things electronically.  I like holding books.)  It makes me upset because I don’t know what to make myself more creative.  I have many story ideas floating in my head, but only the ones that I think is the most interesting to readers ever make to the writing process.  Even then, they’re pretty meh.  :(  My lack of creativity is also one of the many reasons as to why I decided not to get a writing degree, for those that may be wondering if I had ever considered.

    I’m easily inspired by many things - concepts, aesthetics, emotions, and especially music, but I feel like I’ve lost my ability to covey my feelings upon being inspired.  I’ve started to read, but especially analyze how an author establishes everything in regards to a plot line, characters, and character development.  In simple words, I want my writing style to change and I’m trying to find my voice as a writer.  It’s hard since I’m not entirely sure where my niche lies.  My recent stories seem fine for now, but I still feel as if they’re not great enough.  There’s so much I have to work on.

    Some are probably wondering why I’m taking this so seriously when it’s really just a hobby, but this “hobby” can definitely turn into something worthwhile when I’m ready to write a real book.  A lot of AFF writers I’ve heard about have stopped writing because they feel like they’re going nowhere with this hobby.  In many ways, it is very true.  We’re not getting paid to write.  In fact, we’re wasting our precious time to write for free and for fun.  It doesn’t help us in any way.  We can’t even really put this on our resumes when we’re applying for jobs because this “experience” isn’t reasonable nor is it professional enough.  I, on the other had, feel that even though I’m not thinking about publishing now I’m sure I’ll eventually do it.  It won’t be any time soon though.  It’ll be at a time when I’m much older, with a concise and clear voice and a story that hopefully many can relate to.  I’ve seriously started to like short stories more than novels in the past year so if I ever publish anything, I’ll probably publish a short story collection.

    As many of my readers my realize, my stories like to depict life as realistic as possible.  Fan fiction isn’t necessarily “reality,” but I try my best to do what I can with them.  This is probably why I can’t write crack fics, but I think I already did with one of my Lee Jonghyun fics with the KMF concert.  LOL  As I turned 24 this year, I’ve come to realize that I want to break away from writing fanfics but I’m not entirely sure how.  A writing professor I once had a class with said that when you write, you have to share it or else it’s just a waste of time and I find this very true.  There’s no point to write if there’s no audience besides yourself.  

    I also want to write about more “slice of life fics/one shots” now that I’m completely out of my cliche fanfic phase.  I’ve been wanting to do that for a long time already and I’m currently in the process of writing a one shot right now.  I recently came up with a new one, loosely inspired by Cheese in the Trap’s characters Baek Inha/Inho and my own life experiences too.  Although I’d also like to explore more fantasy and/or sic fi, I’ve come to realized that it’s REALLY hard to set up a story for those genres.  I’m currently not in the mood nor really have the mood to just set up a story for something like fantasy/sci fi.  LOL  Sorry, not sorry, you all.  I’m sure you wouldn’t want to read any of those genres from me any ways.  They’d be worst than the ones I’m currently writing right now.

Last but not least, sorry about boring you all with my rambling.  I doubt it anyone would actually read it.  HA!

LOVE,

loveFORyunho