Damn these people, they make me trust them only to leave me in the end, what the hell is wrong with this world?

A lot of people asks me why I don't get attached and why I don't give my trust, why there is a thick wall surrounding my heart that they can't seem to cross; to these questions, I only have one answer, it is because once I trust them and get attached they would just hurt me in the end. This world runs in corruption and lies, distrust and pain. So why go through the hardships of it all when I already have a person I know wouldn't hurt me like everyone else did?

I knew from the beginning this so called friends of mine will leave, and I am not the slightest bit disappointed, you know that feeling inside your brain when you know that they aren't there to be your friends, they are there to treat you like one and use you only to leave you hanging right after they are done with you? Yes people, that is the exact feeling I have, and I don't just feel it, I know it, I know I am right, but I can't leave them, why? Because I am afraid to be alone once again. I spent more than half of my life keeping everything to myself becasue of the trauma of being left behind, I am trying my best here, to be friendly, to smile more, to be livelier, but it scared me how much a person can change in just a blink of an eye, it scares me to change because in the process I might lose myself.

Damn you! Damn you people but I can't leave you because deep inside I might be wrong, deep inside I am hoping I was wrong from the beginning, so do not disappoint me, I am not leaving you, not anytime soon because I am hoping you six people who already know who you are will not be like anyone else who just needs me to pass their exams.

Damn you! Because no matter how much I deny it to myself I am getting attached to the six of you.

So will you please be one of those people who will take me away from the pain? That is the only favor I am asking of you.